Chapter Thirty-Three
Indi
It’s been five long, horrible weeks since everything blew apart at the funfair. One second, I was happy, laughing with Caleb, feeling like maybe life was finally giving me something good for once, and the next, Sasha appeared and destroyed everything.
Although really, Caleb destroyed it the second he slept with her.
Yeah, technically, we weren’t together at the time, so it wasn’t cheating in the strictest sense, but that doesn’t stop it from hurting. The fact remains that hours after almost sleeping with me, he slept with another woman instead. No explanation in the world makes that sit right in my chest.
Then Sasha claimed they’d been sneaking around behind my back for weeks. Caleb denied it, but I couldn’t even bring myself to look into his eyes long enough to know whether he was telling the truth.
And honestly? The fact that she said it at all planted a seed of doubt I can’t seem to rip out.
If he really was sleeping with her while telling me he loved me, then he’s not the man I thought he was.
So why does it feel like my entire heart is missing without him?
God, I miss him.
Every single day, every time my phone rings and his name flashes across the screen, every cell in my body wants to answer. But I can’t do it. It hurts too much. He broke something inside me this time that feels impossible to repair.
I still love him.
Still miss him.
Still crave him.
But the pain Sasha caused that night drove so deep into my chest that it feels embedded there permanently. Maybe one day I’ll be able to hear his explanation. Maybe time will soften this enough for me to listen.
But not yet.
Living with Kenzi has been strange, but good. She keeps me grounded when I start spiraling and reminds me why I left in the first place, why I can’t just run back to Caleb because I miss him.
He sold our story to the press.
My story.
Combined with the Sasha disaster, it makes me question whether I ever truly knew him at all.
Tonight’s shift has been unusually quiet. The emergency department is calm for once, with barely any serious cases coming through. The nurses are joking around while trying to keep the few patients we do have entertained and comfortable.
Then suddenly the emergency alarm sounds.
Kenzi and I immediately move toward the ambulance bay, waiting for the paramedics to wheel in whoever’s coming through the doors next.
I hear the patient before I properly see him.
Male voice. Young. Groaning in agony.
The hairs all over my body rise instantly.
“Male, early twenties,” one of the paramedics rattles off quickly while pushing the gurney inside. “Single-vehicle collision with a tree. Possible intoxication. Blood pressure dropping. Complaining of severe pain on the left side. Possible concussion and multiple lacerations from shattered debris.”
The patient groans again.
Something cold sweeps through me.
People crowd around the gurney, blocking my view, but every instinct in my body suddenly starts screaming.
Kenzi steps closer to assess him, and the second she sees his face, her eyes widen in horror, then she looks straight at me.
My heart stops.
Everything suddenly clicks into place.
“No…” I whisper.
My feet move before my brain catches up. I shove forward through the crowd just as the paramedics step aside.
And there he is.
Caleb.
Broken, bloody, and barely conscious.
A strangled sound catches in my throat as my eyes rake frantically over him in automatic assessment mode.
Laceration to his forehead. Cuts and abrasions everywhere.
Bruising blooming violently beneath a tear in his shirt near his ribs.
His jeans are shredded on the left leg. His face is twisted in pain beneath the oxygen mask while he writhes weakly on the gurney.
My hand flies to my mouth. “Oh my God,” I whisper shakily.
“Indi, get out of here,” Kenzi says sharply while examining his side.
The second she presses near his ribs, Caleb lets out a horrifying groan of pain, and I start shaking violently.
“Kenzi…” Tears blur my vision instantly while doctors and nurses rush around him, attaching monitors and shouting observations.
Kenzi looks up at me, her face softening. “I know, hun. I’ve got him. Just step back for me, okay?”
I nod.
But my feet refuse to move.
I’m frozen, watching the man I love lying there broken in front of me.
“We need to prep him for emergency surgery,” the doctor beside Kenzi says urgently. “Possible internal bleeding.”
Oh God.
Panic explodes through me, and before anyone can stop me, I shove past Rachel and rush to Caleb’s side. “C-Caleb!” My voice cracks as I grab his face gently between my shaking hands. “Caleb, can you h-hear me?”
“Indi, what are you doing?” Rachel asks in shock.
“Let her go,” Kenzi says quietly.
Caleb’s eyes remain squeezed shut while pain tears through him in waves.
“Caleb, please,” I sob, brushing my fingers over his cheek. “Please come back to me. I promise we can talk. We can talk as long as you want, okay? Just please make it through this.”
“Indi, we have to move,” Kenzi says urgently.
I nod frantically, and then, before they wheel him away, I do something completely reckless. I pull off his oxygen mask and lean down, pressing my trembling lips softly against his.
There’s no response.
But if he dies on that operating table and I never kiss him again, I’ll never survive it.
Pulling back, I see a single tear slip down the side of his face.
My breath catches painfully.
I replace the oxygen mask with shaking hands and caress his cheek one last time while tears pour uncontrollably down my face. “Come back to me, Caleb,” I whisper.
Then… he’s gone.
Whisked away toward surgery while I’m left standing there, covered in his blood and trying not to fall apart completely. My heart races violently inside my chest. I can’t breathe. My stomach churns so hard that bile burns the back of my throat.
His image keeps replaying in my head.
Caleb.
My Caleb.
Broken and bleeding and in pain.
My knees buckle.
Reaching blindly for the instrument tray beside me, I miss completely and crash to the floor along with the tray, metal clattering deafeningly around me.
Rachel rushes over immediately while I curl inward, sobbing into my hands.
“Oh, Indi,” she says gently, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
I can’t tell her the love of my life might be dying upstairs while I sit here helplessly on the emergency room floor.
The sobs only get worse until I’m gagging from how hard I’m crying. All I can think about is everything left unsaid between us. Every wasted day. Every ignored phone call. Every stubborn decision to stay away from him.
I should have listened.
Should have talked to him.
Should have found out the truth.
Because now he might die before I ever get the chance.
A violent twist hits my stomach, and I barely manage to pull my hands away before vomiting onto the emergency room floor.
“Geez, Indi,” Rachel says sympathetically while cleaning up around me. “You’ve worked yourself into a proper state.”
I feel weak. Completely hollow.
All I can picture is Caleb in a coffin.
And I never told him one last time that I love him.
“Indi!” Kenzi’s voice cuts through my breakdown moments before running footsteps approach rapidly.
I don’t even have the strength to lift my head before she’s kneeling beside me, pulling me straight into her lap.
“It’s okay,” she says quickly while I cling to her desperately. “His spleen was lacerated and close to rupturing, but they caught it in time. They’re doing a splenectomy now to stop the bleeding. They’ll remove the glass shards while he’s under.”
My mind spins so fast I can barely process the words.
Then suddenly another thought slams into me.
“His kidney!” I gasp, looking up at her frantically. “Kenz, he had a transplant. They have to check his kidney.”
Kenzi immediately brushes hair back from my face, reassuringly. “Already told the surgeon. I remembered you mentioning it before. His kidney is fine, Indi.”
Relief crashes through me so hard.
“He’s not completely out of danger yet,” she continues carefully. “But they found the bleed. As long as nothing else major comes up during surgery, he should be okay.”
I bury my face against her shoulder while she hugs me tightly.
“I know how much he means to you,” she murmurs.
“And watching you react when he came through those doors told me everything I needed to know.” More tears spill down my cheeks.
“You love him. That’s obvious.” I close my eyes tightly.
“When he wakes up,” she says softly. “You two need to sort this out. Because clearly he makes terrible decisions without you, and without him, you’ve been miserable.
” A watery laugh escapes me through the tears.
“Sometimes it takes something huge like this…” Kenzi whispers, “… to make people realize what’s been right in front of them the whole time. ”
I nod weakly while wiping my face. “Can I watch the surgery?” I ask quietly.
Kenzi shakes her head immediately. “No chance. But maybe you should call his family.”
Hux, Macy. Dee, Colt. Oh God.
“Okay,” I whisper. “Sorry, I completely lost it.”
“Hey.” She squeezes my hand firmly. “The man you love nearly died. You’re allowed to fall apart a little.”
She stands and helps me to my feet, shakily. My knees still wobble badly, but she keeps an arm around my waist while guiding me toward the staff lounge.
Pulling my cell from my pocket, I stare down at the screen for a long moment before opening Hux’s contact for the first time in years.
***
Macy and Hux come rushing through the emergency room doors, spotting me almost instantly.
I stand on shaky legs as Macy throws her arms around me so tightly it nearly knocks the breath from my lungs.
“Oh, sweet Indi,” she says emotionally while holding onto me. “It’s so good to see you. How is he?”
She pulls back only long enough to move straight into Hux’s arms while he wraps himself protectively around her shoulders.
“Hi guys,” I say softly, trying to keep my composure. “I’m sorry it’s under circumstances like this.”