Chapter Forty-Three #2
Dad’s grip tightens on my shoulder. “What are you talking about?”
“She’ll go to the police. Hell, she’ll probably be talking to the press already.”
“Where is she?”
“She got away.”
“Is she all right?”
I nod once. “She’ll live.”
He exhales heavily and glances up and down the hallway before pulling me into his room and quietly shutting the door behind us. “Keep your voice down.”
I rake both hands through my hair, unable to stand still while he watches me with a mixture of disbelief and concern. “Are you being serious?”
I nod again. “She was unconscious for a second. I let go before…” My voice catches. “Before it was too late.”
“Jesus Christ, Caleb.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone.
“What are you doing?”
“Trying to get ahead of this before it gets any worse.”
I watch him type furiously while I pace the room, every muscle in my body wound so tightly I feel like I’m vibrating beneath my own skin.
“Caleb,” he says after sending the message. “You need to calm down.”
“I can’t.”
“You have to.”
“I have to get to Indi.”
“No.” I stop pacing and stare at him. “If you leave Germany now and Sasha goes to the police, it’ll look like you’re running.”
“I don’t fucking care!”
“You will if the authorities decide to charge you.”
I close my eyes and drag a hand through my hair, trying to force my thoughts into some kind of order, but everything keeps circling back to Indi. “Dad, she’ll leave.”
“I know.”
“You know exactly what she’s like.”
“I do.”
“And if I get back in two weeks, she will be gone.”
Dad sighs. “Maybe. But if you leave now and this blows up, you could lose far more than your relationship.”
I laugh bitterly. “I don’t give a shit about my career.”
“This isn’t about your career, son. His voice softens. “This is about your future.”
The fight drains out of me all at once, and I lower myself onto the edge of his bed, dropping my head into my hands, feeling every ounce of exhaustion crash over me now that the adrenaline has finally started to fade. “What the fuck am I supposed to do?”
Dad sits beside me, resting his forearms on his knees. “Right now? You stay here.” I don’t answer. “You think clearly, you wait to see whether Sasha reports this, and you let me deal with the rest.”
My laugh is humorless. “While Indi sits in London thinking I’ve betrayed her.”
“I know.”
“She’ll hate me.”
“I don’t think she could ever hate you, Caleb.”
“She won’t need to.” I stare blankly at the carpet. “Walking away will hurt just as much.”
Silence settles between us.
The reality of everything I’ve done begins pressing down on me all at once.
Sasha.
The police.
The media.
The tour.
The band.
My family.
If this gets out, it won’t just destroy me. It will drag everyone else down with me.
And then there’s Indi.
God… when she finds out how close I came to killing someone, what will she think? The thought twists something deep inside my chest.
Dad places a hand on my shoulder. “Listen to me. We’ll deal with one problem at a time.”
I shake my head. “I don’t even know where to start.”
“You start by breathing.”
I let out a slow, shaky breath, but it does nothing to ease the ache hollowing out my chest.
Somewhere in London, Indi is sitting alone, convinced I’ve broken her trust… again.
She doesn’t know the truth.
She doesn’t know that everything she had believed about that night was a lie.
A tear slips free before I can stop it.
Then another.
Dad slides an arm around my shoulders. “I hate seeing you like this.”
I swipe at my face with the heel of my hand and laugh bitterly. “Everyone thinks I’m strong.”
“You are.”
I shake my head. “Not where Indi’s concerned.
” The words scrape their way out of me. “That woman has always been my weakness.” I swallow hard against the lump in my throat.
“And this time, I think I’ve finally lost her.
” Saying it aloud makes the pain almost unbearable. “I don’t know how to fix this.”
Dad doesn’t try to tell me everything will be okay.
He doesn’t make promises he can’t keep.
He simply sits beside me, his arm still around my shoulders, while the silence settles between us and I mourn the possibility that, after everything we had survived to find our way back to each other, I might have lost the only woman I’ve ever truly loved.
***
Whatever Dad did to silence Sasha worked.
We never heard another word about what happened that night, and I stayed in Germany until it was time to continue the tour.
For two weeks, I lived in limbo.
I tried reaching Indi every way I could think of.
I called, texted, emailed, messaged her on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, you name it, and even rang her at work, but no one would put me through.
Desperation eventually got the better of me, and I even spoke to her from the stage during one of our shows, hoping she’d be watching the livestream and somehow understand that every word was meant for her.
Instead, I copped an earful from both Dad and Rob about declaring my love on stage and sending not-so-subtle messages for her to contact me.
None of it mattered.
She never replied.
The silence has been eating me alive, and I don’t know what else to do except go to her. The moment I step off this plane, I’m heading straight to her house. If she won’t answer the phone, then I’ll stand on her doorstep until she listens to me.
We’ve been on the ground for ten minutes, yet the cabin doors still haven’t opened.
“For fuck’s sake.”
“Caleb,” Dad calls from a few rows behind me. I glance back. “Just stay calm when you see her, okay?”
I nod, although I am not sure I’m capable of being calm anymore.
The moment the doors open, I am down the stairs before anyone else has even unbuckled their seatbelt. I barely manage a hurried goodbye before sprinting toward the cab stand.
“Thornhill Road,” I tell the driver as I climb into the back seat.
During the drive, I try calling Indi again…
Voicemail.
I leave yet another message. “Baby, I’m back in London. I’m coming to see you. Please… just let me explain.”
The line disconnects.
Twenty minutes later, the cab pulls up outside her house.
Everything looks exactly the way I remember it.
Everything except one thing.
Her car isn’t there.
That’s okay.
She could be at work.
I’ll wait as long as I have to.
I pay the driver, hurry up the path, and knock firmly on the front door. Part of me expects Mrs. Latham to appear from next door, pretending not to be watching while listening to every word, but the curtains remain still.
I knock again.
A few moments later, the door opens.
“Indi, I promise I…” The words die in my throat.
A little girl, no older than five, stares up at me with curious blue eyes.
I blink. “Uh… hi.” I manage an awkward smile. “Is Indi home?”
She shakes her head. “Nope. Just me and Mummy.”
“Mummy?”
Footsteps sound from inside the house before a red-haired woman appears behind her, gently resting a hand on the little girl’s shoulder. “Can I help you?”
“Sorry,” I say quickly. “I’m looking for Indi. She… she lives here.”
Realization crosses the woman’s face. “Oh, right. We moved in about a week ago. The previous tenant moved out.”
The words hit me like a damn punch.
She left.
Again.
I swallow hard. “Did she leave a forwarding address?”
The woman gives me an apologetic smile, then shakes her head. “I’m sorry. No.”
“Right.” The word barely makes it past the knot tightening in my throat. “Thanks.” I step back from the doorway, managing a polite smile that feels anything but genuine before turning away.
Every step down the path feels heavier than the last.
This house holds almost every memory I have of us.
Our first nights together.
The laughter.
The arguments.
The makeup sex.
The plans we had made for a future that suddenly feels further away than ever.
And now she’s gone.
I stop at the front gate and drag a hand through my hair, fighting the sinking feeling in my chest.
Goddammit! She could be anywhere.
But one person might know where she’s gone.
Kenzi.