Chapter 12 Pry Those Cracks Open
PRY THOSE CRACKS OPEN
Grocery shopping together wasn’t exactly how he’d thought he’d spend some time with Nora outside of work.
But he wasn’t one to let an opportunity pass.
The fact that she replied so quickly and said yes was enough for him to give this a try.
She was waiting outside her apartment building when he pulled up, he’d told her what he was driving, got next to the side of the road for her to hop in and then pulled out.
Anyone else might think he was an Uber driver grabbing her.
In a Cayenne GTS. Probably not.
“Say it,” he said when she buckled in.
“I expected a sports car and not an SUV. Maybe a Porsche or Lamborghini.”
He laughed and pointed to the steering wheel. “Got myself a Porsche, but a responsible one.”
She cringed. “Now I feel like an idiot. I didn’t even know they made SUVs. Sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’ve been labeled most of my life.
As for sports cars, I had one. A Porsche and it was fun, but I don’t do a lot of driving and when I moved to my new condo, even less.
If I really want to have some fun, Eli has the Lamborghini.
Though he rarely drives it. He let’s me take it out now and again to get some usage, but I don’t have the time. ”
Nor did he always like the eyes on him now like he had years ago.
Him and a friend hitting the highway, driving around Boston and getting the looks.
Women ate it up, but those weren’t the type of women he wanted in his life anymore.
“That’s a bit over my head. I drive a Subaru SUV.”
“Seems to fit coming from Vermont. Bet you haven’t driven it much lately, have you?”
“No. I almost don’t even want to, but once a week I start it up and drive around the block a few times, which takes me almost thirty minutes, then park it again.”
“It’s much easier to walk everywhere. Faster to walk to work, even than taking mass transit.”
“I’m concerned how it’s going to be come winter and a snowy cold day. I’ll bundle up and I’m assuming sidewalks and everything are cleared.”
“They are. And since we are less than a half a mile away, on those days I tend to either drive in or work from home. If I’m not in, you don’t have to be. Or I can pick you up. It’s not as if it’s out of my way.”
“Really?” she asked.
“Why do you seem so shocked? I swear my mother didn’t raise a heathen.”
“Blair said you’re really nice. I mean, I knew that... from before.”
“I’m still that person,” he said. “Put it behind you I’m your boss right now. Consider me that guy you met a month ago, this time showing you the best places to pick up canned goods.”
She turned her head. They were just sitting in traffic like he’d expected would happen for the short drive.
“I’ll try. Where are we going?”
“Stop and Shop. It’s technically Boston, but really the Brookline area. Less than five miles but could take thirty minutes. So welcome to Boston.”
“I’m learning that. I guess it explains why everyone is so fit around here. They are always walking. Maybe if we had stayed here when I was younger, I would have thinned out sooner.”
“I don’t know that I remembered you as chubby as you might think you were.”
He tried to think back when she was a kid. The glasses and sitting by herself with a book stood out more than wild hair or chubbiness.
“Back then maybe not really. As I got older, it happened. There isn’t a lot to do in Vermont. I didn’t play sports and found comfort in food. Not the right kind either.”
“Doesn’t seem as if it’s a problem now. Not that I’m watching you, but I haven’t seen any greasy burgers or hot Cheetos.”
“I do love me a bacon burger,” she said. “But hot Cheetos? No. Anything that leaves stains on my fingers just grosses me out. Please, don’t tell me you eat them.”
“No comment,” he said, turning back to the road even though they weren’t moving.
Now that meant not throwing his favorite indulgence in the cart.
Fuck that.
He was doing his shopping for the month, he’d get them if he wanted and she could judge. Everyone had a guilty pleasure.
The one he wanted was in the passenger seat, but today had to be about something else completely.
“Well then,” she said. “I’ll know to add that to the chocolate list.”
“Oh God, don’t tell Blair. She has no idea.”
He felt Nora’s eyes on him, so he turned his head. They still hadn’t moved from the light. “Are you afraid of her? How could she not know? I thought she knew everything about you.”
“Not everything,” he murmured. “She doesn’t know about us.”
A flush filled Nora’s face similar to that of his favorite late night snack. Hot and red, ready for him to lick clean off his fingers. This separation thing was fucking hard!
“Are you sure?” she asked.
“Yes,” he said. “Why? I have said nothing and I won’t.”
“Just some things she’s commented on.”
“Like?”
“I don’t know. Forget I said it.”
“It’s hard to do that. Give me an example.”
His eyes drifted over her as they sat in the car.
She wore jean shorts that hit mid-thigh when she was walking, but sitting now, they rode up just a little higher. The muscles in her legs that had been taut and smooth when they ran side by side were relaxed now, loose and unguarded.
That’s how he wanted her to feel.
But he wasn’t sure she ever fully did.
Her mint-green T-shirt was soft and wide, brushing the waistband of her shorts. For someone with a body that strong, she never showed it off... except for that one night.
Even then, she hadn’t dressed to impress. Maybe that was part of what drew him in.
He could still picture her sitting at the bar that night. Black cropped pants hugging her legs, the thin straps of her sandals wrapping her ankles, one leg crossed over the other. The purple silk top tucked neatly into her waistband, flowing just enough to tease a hint of what was beneath.
She wasn’t trying to turn heads.
She just did.
The way her light brown hair was tousled with loose curls as if someone had run their fingers through holding on for a deep kiss.
Her hazel eyes darker at the bar, assessing his actions with his words before she spoke her own.
There was a quiet confidence about her. Something that came from inside, something she didn’t need to advertise.
That was who he thought she was.
Lately, he realized that some of that confidence had been a front.
But every so often, he’d catch glimpses of the woman from that night. The spark, the humor, the soft ease behind her eyes, and he couldn’t help himself.
He wanted to pry those cracks open again.
To see her let go.
To find the woman who’d all but beckoned him with her presence even though he’d promised himself that he’d put it in the past.
Seemed to him she couldn’t do it as easily as she boasted either.
Maybe they could come to terms of sorts. A little arrangement.
“It’s hard to pinpoint one,” she said. “Blair likes to sell you.”
“Sell me? How?” he croaked out. That was the last thing he needed.
That his soon-to-be-old assistant was pimping him out to his new one.
Would Nora think he hit on women all the time?
“You should see your face right now,” she said, pointing. “You’re almost appalled. It’s not bad.”
“Thank God. But it might be in my mind. What’s she’s saying?”
“Nothing to get her in trouble and now I wish I hadn’t said anything.”
“But you said something, so I’d like you to continue.”
“Are you asking as my boss?”
It was the questioning tone. The one that said he could make a huge misstep if he didn’t find the right line to balance on.
“No. We aren’t on the clock. And if it’s making you feel uncomfortable, I’ll apologize. We agreed that what happened that night has nothing to do with what goes on in the office.”
“I don’t remember agreeing to that,” she said.
At least there was humor this time. “So you tell me then, what are you feeling when she brings up nice things about me? All those good qualities that make me a stellar boss who is sought by many? Who everyone is fighting the masses to be graced with my presence?”
“Wow, talk about full of yourself. And that’s what she said. That you are. But in a good way. You don’t lack confidence and turn a lot into humor.”
“Those things are true,” he said, shrugging. “But I take my job very seriously.”
“I see that. And she made that clear too. Never think otherwise. She speaks highly of you. It’s not the words as much as the tone, if that helps. I can’t explain it any other way.”
“That’s good enough for now,” he said. Because it’d have to be.
Traffic was moving a little more now, the silence stretching on his nerves as if his skin was almost translucent and ready to be cut open exposing some insecurities he rarely felt around women.
What was it about Nora that had him doubting his every thought, every action?
“So...do you really stock up on groceries or are you just being nice to me?”
“Both,” he said. “I really do. It was my plan and I thought I’d extend it to you. Just show you around some. You could have said no.”
“I could have but wanted to check some things out. I’ve been a little nervous exploring too far on my own. I know it’s silly, but it’s taken a lot for me to do this. I don’t even go that far past the office building. I will at some point, but being alone... just makes me nervous.”
“You’re not today,” he said. “And if you want, we can explore some together. How about we just get our food, return to our places and then figure out the rest of the day as it comes?”
“I find it hard to believe this is what you do on your weekends. It’s barely nine on a Saturday morning. You were out running at seven.”
“You before seven,” he said.
“But I’ve got no life. I don’t know anyone here other than my father.”
“And me,” he said.
“And you. But that’s it. My apartment is tiny and not a lot to do in it. I walk around the area, read, maybe hit the gym, but this time of year it’s too nice to do it.”
“I feel the same way, which is why I get my butt up bright and early for the run to get it out of the way. If you don’t want to do much more than buy some food, that’s fine.
I’ve got a lot of work I could do, but I try to disconnect when I can.
And it’s rarely. So be a pal. If I’m not working, then you don’t have to worry about going in on Monday to stuff too. ”
“Well, when you put it that way.”