Chapter 22 A Purpose
A PURPOSE
“Iwondered how long it’d be before you let me see your place,” Arik said the next Friday.
“I figured if you were going to meet my family in a few days, the least you could do was see where I lived. You can pick me up here.”
Or maybe stay the night.
She was running out of the strength to fight off the heat he ignited inside of her.
“I can do that,” he said. “Show me around.”
“Not much to see. It’s a tiny space with little view or quiet, but it works.”
She could get a bigger place now. A nicer view. But she could save more if she stayed and this worked for her.
It wasn’t as if she spent much time here.
“I live in hotels, so this is bigger than anything I’ve had in years.”
“I’m surprised you haven’t rented homes or villas or beaches in foreign countries.”
“I have but rarely. I like staying in the US most times. No clue why. It’s hard enough being alone when you travel, but when you don’t understand the language it’s even harder to fit in.”
“Learning a new language should be a hobby then,” she said, poking her finger into his side.
“I need to feel a passion for it.”
“Oh, like puzzles,” she said.
She’d gone back yesterday and they finished the puzzle. He’d been working on it without her. He said he couldn’t just leave it there. The mountain design had been staring at him, begging him to fit the pieces in place.
She wondered if that was how he looked at her.
As if she were a missing puzzle piece he was jamming in quickly.
Since she felt the same, it was hard for her to hold it against him.
He said time wasn’t running out, but her ears heard the ticking of the clock that he’d only be here another two weeks.
It didn’t seem possible he’d been here half his stay already.
“I bought another one,” he said. “We can start that one.”
“Or you’ll do it alone.”
He shrugged. “Sorry. I’ve been researching the island while checking on my investments. There is only so much of that I want to do.”
“I’d think you’d get sucked into it.”
“I did early on and it turned into a job. It’s not what I want.”
“What do you want?” she asked. “In terms of a career or your time during the day?”
Things she should know.
She had to work. Had to have structure. Had to feel as if there was a purpose in her life.
“I don’t know. I hate I can’t figure it out. It doesn’t sit well with me.”
“Why?”
He stared at her and then moved to the couch and patted the seat. “Sit down. I’m going to bare my soul to you and hope you don’t laugh.”
“I’d never do that.”
“You wouldn’t because you’ll put your politically correct people pleaser work face on, but I’m more concerned with the reaction inside that you hide.”
“I don’t hide much from you. I told you that.”
“And I don’t want you to. You asked why this feeling doesn’t sit well with me. It’s because I worry that there is some gene I’ve got from my parents that makes me not be able to commit to anything.”
Not exactly what she wanted to hear and was struggling to keep her reaction hidden.
“You have committed before to work, right?”
“If you can count a few years. Both my jobs had an end goal.”
“But if the businesses hadn’t sold, do you think you’d still be there?”
“I could have stayed and continued to work,” he said. “I would have been given some lofty title on a gold plaque that I’d cringe at every time I walked past it.”
“Which means it wasn’t meant for you. Some people take longer to find that thing. Your parents both have careers they’ve stuck with. They can commit.”
“I don’t know why I haven’t thought of that.”
“What about women?” she asked. “Have you been in relationships?”
“Sure. Not anything more than a year. I had a few when I was more stable in my living situation. After that, just dating here and there. No one has made me want to stay where I was.”
She pursed her lips and nodded her head. “I see.”
“I’m being honest. I’m not ready to leave here. Don’t think that. I’m looking for a house to rent and it’s not easy. I hadn’t realized how hard it’d be on the island. I’m not fussy, but the only place I found right now is just for a month.”
That was promising. “How much longer do you want to stay?”
“No end date for me. It’s open. If I have to take that house for the month, I will while I find something else. I can get a hotel too, but hopping around isn’t something I always enjoy despite what you think.”
“I never thought you enjoyed that,” she said. “Don’t lump me in with other people.”
“Did I just hit a nerve?”
“I think you might have.”
She stood up to walk to her kitchen for a drink. Her throat was scratchy with the urge to lecture him.
“I’m glad that I can.”
“You are?”
“Yes. Because it proves without words that you are letting your guard down around me.”
“I wouldn’t lie about that. If you really want to stay here longer, have you reached out to Bond Realty? They normally have a line on houses that could be rented long term.”
“I haven’t. It was my next step but wanted to see your thoughts on it.”
“How come?”
“Because I’m doing it for you, Natalie. For us. If you tell me there is no us, then why waste my time?”
She wrinkled her nose. “Waste your time? I thought you had a lot of it.”
“And there is the nerve I wanted to tap with a hot poker.”
“You said that on purpose?” she asked, taking the top off her water and drinking it fast, cooling her heated throat.
“Yep. I wanted to know how much you wanted this. Do you know how many women in my life don’t care enough? It was a game to them. A win in the end.”
“Women like Brandi? That’s who you spent your time with?”
“No. Never. Don’t think that. Most times, I didn’t even tell them what I did or who I was, or my background. I told you that. But the longer we’d spend together they’d search. If you look deep enough you’ll find some things about my business. Not specifics but enough to give an idea.”
“I wouldn’t like that,” she said.
“And I don’t either.”
“This isn’t a game to me. If anything, I might have thought it was one to you considering what we did last weekend.”
“No game. And I’m sorry if it came off that way.” He stood to get close in her space. “I don’t want to fight, but I’m glad to know you can. That you’ll give me shit.”
“I will if I have to.”
“I want us to be open with the other. You gave me the answer I needed and I’ll make the call on Monday about a long-term rental.”
“I’m not making promises,” she said.
“I’m not asking for them. I’m looking for six months on the island. If it’s spent with you, I’ll be in heaven.”
“Heaven?” she asked. He was back to joking.
“That’s how I want it to feel,” he said. “How it’s felt so far.” His hand caressed the side of her face, tucking her hair behind her ears. “How about you?”
“I’ve never felt like heaven with anyone before.”
“Do you want to?” he asked, his lips a whisper away from hers.
“Doesn’t every woman want to feel desired?”
“I only want to know about you, Natalie.”
“Then yes,” she said. “I want you to desire me. I want you to feel what you have lit inside of me.”
Her mouth landed on his, her tongue invading and tasting, the heat she’d talked of was stoking a fire in her core and spreading between her legs.
They’d gotten off track with the conversation but were able to swing it back quickly enough.
Words and actions didn’t always have to align.
Or more like their actions with each other proved more than words could.
The chemistry between them was unlike anything she’d ever known. Undeniable, electric, and terrifyingly real.
She longed to have a partner who felt the same.
Someone who could let go with her the way she craved to let go with him.
“Are you going to show me to your room or do we still need to dance around each other?”
“I brought you here for that,” she said. “Glad to know our words didn’t slow us down too much.”
She didn’t want their first time to be in the place she worked.
Where people knew her.
Leaving his room, as it was, was a risk, but she never looked as if she had a hair out of place and always left as if she was working late.
But getting naked or spending the night…that would result in more comments than she was prepared for.
“Thank God,” he said. “I hoped that was your reason.”
He picked her up in his arms, cradling her as he moved down a small hall toward her bedroom.
Her body was laid on the bed, him coming down on top of her.
Her fingers tangled in his hair, her hips rising to meet his, and their mouths moved in a rhythm that promised everything still to come.
His hand slid up her side, slipping beneath her sweater before curving around to cup her breast. Her nipple responded instantly, straining beneath the fabric, silently pleading for the barrier of her bra to disappear.
He didn’t keep her waiting, his fingers finding their way to her tender puckered flesh.
She groaned and pressed her hips to his, her legs coming up to wrap around his back.
It was as if a starting gun exploded, his body reared back, his shirt coming off.
She’d been dying to see his chest again. The contours of the muscles, the sprinkling of hair. This time she could touch without embarrassment and pure abandonment.
She sat up, undressing just as quickly as him. She didn’t want tender. She didn’t want gentle.
They’d driven each other to the edge for days, so taut with need that only a fast, burning release could bring the satisfaction they craved.
Their pants were lowered, undergarments discarded. She was on the bed with him diving next to her, a condom in his hand.
She took it away from him, opened the package, got on her knees and covered him in jerky motions until they were both done stripping.
He flipped her onto her back, the laughter of that move filling the room.
Maybe she’d imagined their first time would be slow and unforgettable, drawn out with aching touches and breathless longing. But the heat, the urgency, the laughter between kisses? It was better. So much better.
He landed on top of her, his knees pushing her thighs apart more, probing for entrance that she gladly granted.
He slammed into her, her back arched, his mouth crushed hers and their tongues were matching the speed of their hips mashing together. Lifting and lowering, grinding for more.
Her ankles crossed behind his back, his hand in her hair holding her head steady as he pounded into her.
Her bed had never seen or felt action this fierce before but was holding up like a champ even with all the squeaking.
The pressure in her was building, the quest to reach the end in sight.
“Please get me there,” she said. “I’m so close.”
His hand slid under her hips, pulled her up from the mattress so that she was lifted in the air as he continued to make their bodies one.
She was barely holding on until that peak was there, in her vision, and calling her name.
It was Arik, he was coming with her, the two of them throbbing and letting the other know they had them.
Her body landed with a loud thunk on her bed, him on top of her, knocking the breath from her lungs.
She burst into laughter.
“What’s so funny?”
“That’s not how I thought our first time would be, and I’m so glad I was wrong!”