Chapter 28 #2
‘I think,’ Zoe said carefully, deciding that there was no point in pussyfooting around the issue now, ‘it’s Lennon everyone has a problem with, not you.’
‘Don’t know why…’ Her dad scratched the back of his neck. ‘Lennon’s done nothing bad… apart from that fight, and there’s two sides to every story.’
‘Dad, why are you still defending him?’
‘Chantal’s ever so upset you know.’
‘I’m sorry about that. It was nobody’s intention to upset her. I do like Chantal, you know. I never had a problem with her.’
‘I know, love. Between you and me, I think she got carried away with the idea of countryside living. I don’t— Ah, here she is!’
Whatever he’d been about to say was cut short by Chantal herself coming out of the house with a shopping bag. ‘This is all the scourers and cleaning things from under the sink,’ she said, handing the bag to Nigel. Then she looked at Zoe with a tight smile. ‘Come to say goodbye?’
‘Don’t say it like that,’ Zoe said.
‘I’m not… You’re right. If it sounded arsy, I didn’t mean it to. I’m OK with moving out. I know I was upset before, but frankly it’s too quiet here for me. I think I need all the things going on in the city.’
‘It takes some adjustment, and it’s not for everyone.’ Zoe glanced at her dad, wondering if he’d add anything, but he simply shoved his hands back into his pockets and watched them.
‘We could have stayed,’ Chantal said. ‘Victor told us we could after Lennon went. But that’s the other thing… Lennon needs someone to look out for him. I can’t do that from here.’
Zoe tried not to frown. Lennon was quite capable of looking out for himself. Unless by ‘looking out’ Chantal meant someone had to keep him from getting into trouble of his own making. That she fully agreed with.
‘I know you’ve only been here a short while,’ Zoe said, ‘but it will be weird walking past Kestrel Cottage and you not being there.’
‘At least it’s empty in case you need to move back in, eh?’
Zoe stared at Chantal, surprised by her statement. Did it look like her relationship with Alex wasn’t going to last? Or was it just a mean little dig, a hope that it wouldn’t?
‘I’d better get on if we’re going to be on the road before lunch,’ Nigel said.
Chantal nodded and then turned to Zoe. ‘Thanks for coming to see us off.’
‘You’ll stay in touch, won’t you?’ Zoe asked. ‘And remember, if you need any advice about the pregnancy—’
‘But I’ll have my old midwife back,’ Chantal cut in. ‘She’s really good.’
‘Right. Well, the offer is there anyway.’
After a quick and strangely charged farewell to both of them, she turned and headed back towards Hilltop.
A low mist was hanging in the hollows, but the sun was already burning it away.
It was going to be a glorious spring day.
Feeling low, despite the promise of a golden morning, she took a detour.
Alex would be on the camping field now, working on his pods.
He would be busy, but right now she desperately needed a friendly face.
She had to laugh. She found him sitting on a camping chair with a flask of tea listening to a podcast.
‘I thought you’d be toiling away!’
He looked up with a sheepish smile. ‘You’re ten minutes too late. I was toiling, honest. I thought I’d take a break.’
Zoe picked up the flask. ‘Hello, old friend.’ She smiled at him. ‘I remember having cups of tea from this when we came looking for treasure… Isn’t it Victor’s?’
‘It might be. Somehow it’s ended up with me. I meant to give it back, but he hasn’t asked, and I keep forgetting.’
‘I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if you use it while it’s in your possession.’
‘That’s what I thought.’
‘And secretly you quite like that you’ve turned into an old man who drinks tea from a flask in a camping chair and listens to stuff about politics.’
‘Well, you keep telling me I’m a grandad. Might as well embrace it.’ He put his cup down and slapped his knees. ‘Come and sit for a while.’
‘We’ll collapse the chair!’
‘We won’t. You’re like an inch tall – you barely weigh anything.’
‘Idiot!’ She smiled as she went to sit on his lap.
He circled her with his arms and kissed her. ‘It’d be good to think life will get back on track now. We can hope. Have you seen your dad?’
‘Yes, and Chantal.’
‘How were they?’
‘Pissed off at me.’
‘I’m sure that’s not true. It was only Lennon who had to go; nobody made them follow him. It was their decision in the end.’
‘You’re right – so why do I feel like it’s my fault Chantal’s rural dream has been crushed?’
‘That’s a bit dramatic. I don’t think it was quite so…’
‘I feel dramatic about it.’
‘I think you’re taking it worse than they are.’
‘You might be right.’
He held her closer. ‘It’ll be OK, you know.’
‘I hope so. I’ve managed to upset my mum, my dad, my stepmum… Sometimes Billie’s none too keen on me either. But at least you’re still speaking to me.’
He let out a warm laugh. ‘Now you’re really scraping the bottom of the barrel!’
‘It’s sad, isn’t it?’
‘For what it’s worth, I love you. I love you enough to make up for everyone else who’s gone off you. In fact, I’d say I love you enough for everyone else in the world. How’s that?’
She rested her head on his shoulder and breathed in.
Her entire world was in that breath – the frosty air of the hills, the grass, the wood of the pods, the faint scent of his soap and his skin and the smell of his hair.
Being in his arms, here, was enough to ground her, to make her feel like everything would be all right.
In this moment, she could understand why people did crazy things for love.
Like her dad, who wanted to be with Chantal no matter the cost. And even Billie, who had a different kind of love for Louisa but no less single-minded in its intensity.
‘I’d say that makes me very happy,’ she said. ‘I’m sure I don’t need anyone else with all that love from you.’
Alex wrapped his arms around her. She turned her face towards Hilltop Farm in the distance and let out a sigh of contentment. Things were already calmer, and she looked forward to getting back to normal.
Once, she might have understood how Chantal could find Thimblebury boring, but not now. Everything she wanted was here, and it always would be.