Chapter 1 #2
The other men were moving around the small area, getting food and water.
I didn’t move. I knew better than to try to run.
I’d be lucky if I made it five steps before one of them caught me.
A gust of wind blew some of the powdery snow into my face, and I shivered, miserably cold.
If only my hands were tied in front of me so I could try to warm them up.
Jaw clenched to keep my teeth from chattering, I risked glancing up, scanning the three men who traveled with my brother.
It didn’t look like they planned to make a fire, just getting food and water and resting.
In the morning light, I could see them clearly now.
Sable’s long hair fell to his collarbones in a silky sheet, and his eyes were so pale blue they almost looked white.
He studied me often with a scrutiny that made my stomach churn.
Tuck was the tallest and had brown skin; his head of messy black curls seemed permanently mussed.
His glances at me seemed more cautiously curious, bordering on concern.
Maybe he was the weak link in my brother’s group.
I glanced at Lee, and all my muscles tensed when I realized he was staring at me.
His hair was pulled up in a messy top knot with a shaved undercut below.
He had high cheekbones and almond-shaped eyes, and again, vague recognition tickled my brain.
For a few seconds, I held his gaze, and then the memory crashed over me.
He was the prisoner from the cells at the Vault—the man who looked at me like he knew me, and Mac had later accused me of helping escape. So he had recognized me. I guessed that answered the question of how Wolf found me.
My revelation must have shown on my face because he smirked again and then said something to Sable and Tuck. They both glanced up, and then all three stared boldly back at me. I dropped my eyes back to the ground again, my skin crawling.
Wolf’s boots appeared before me again, and I tensed but refused to look up. His knees came into view as he crouched in front of me.
“What’s wrong with you?” he asked. “You forget how to talk?”
I didn’t answer, focused on breathing in and out.
Wolf’s hand shot out and seized my jaw, pulling my face up to look at him.
His eyes narrowed as his fingers squeezed into my cheeks and pried my mouth open.
Terrified, I jerked my head back, and he let go, watching as I nearly fell off the rock in my haste to escape. He raised an eyebrow.
“Just making sure you still had your tongue. Never thought I’d see you so quiet.”
I pressed my trembling lips together hard, trying not to think about all the times I watched Juck cut people’s tongues out. Wolf scanned me again with those sharp eyes, taking in my filthy, muddy clothes and the dried blood all over my front.
“Whose blood is that?” he demanded.
I looked away. I was not going to cry. I was going to be numb and empty.
“Godsdamnit, Em, if you don’t tell me, I’m gonna have to search you for injuries.”
Em. The familiar nickname hurt, but his threat terrified me.
“Not mine,” I choked out.
“So she does speak.” He smirked, looking so satisfied that fury roared through me. “Who’d you kill this time?”
My anger fizzled out like he’d dumped a bucket of ice-cold water on my head. I dropped my eyes again, staring at the ground. The fierce ache in my chest surprised me. Apparently, I still had a heart, or just enough of one to break again. Gods, I wished he’d just kill me already and be done with it.
“Here.”
He held out a bottle of water as though offering me a drink. I looked between his face and the water bottle, hesitating.
“It’s just water,” he frowned.
I leaned forward and let him tip some water into my mouth, feeling awkward.
After I got a drink, he reached into his pack again, and I tensed, but he just pulled out a piece of dried meat and held it out to me.
I shook my head and knew he was glaring at me before I even looked. I could feel the heat of it.
“We’re not stoppin’ again until nightfall. You should eat, now.”
I shook my head again, my stomach churning. If I ate anything, I’d just be sick with all this anxiety.
“Fine,” he snapped, dropping the food into his pack and taking it with him as he strode away.
I rested my forehead on my knees, trying to take deep breaths. Was my brother waiting for nightfall for a reason? At least I had an idea of their timetable. I could hear the low mumble of their voices and feel the weight of their eyes, but no one else spoke to me.
Maybe I would get lucky for once in my miserable life and see Trey after I died.
I didn’t know what I believed about the afterlife, but I did know if there was any chance to find him, I would take it.
I’d teased him when he said he’d wait a thousand years for me, but I understood with painful clarity now.
I would live and die and claw my way back a thousand times over just to have one more moment with him.
My throat ached with the force of holding back tears. It’d been over three months, but the pain hadn’t dulled; I’d just grown more accustomed to feeling it.
They only rested for about an hour before they were packing up.
When Wolf’s boots appeared in front of me again, I uncurled from my protective position, and he grabbed my upper arm and hauled me to my feet without a word.
He lifted me onto the horse again and then marched around to the horse’s head to take the lead.
As we traveled, I could feel exhaustion creeping over me.
I tried to fight it, watching Wolf and the others in an attempt to distract myself.
All of them stalked through the woods with an unnatural grace.
Wolf had always been that way, able to adapt and move through his environment like he was a part of it.
He either found others like him or taught them his tricks.
They were quiet, but the few times they interacted, it was with an easy camaraderie that reminded me of Mac’s crew.
I swallowed hard. Mac must have realized I was gone by now.
Would he even think of searching outside the hold?
I might be dead before they realized I wasn’t in the Vault.
The ache in my chest worsened. Talking to Mac, actually talking, had felt like gasping in air after being underwater.
I wished I could have said goodbye and told them I wasn’t abandoning them—not of my own free will, anyway.
How would Wolf kill me? A bullet to the head? A knife in my gut? The bloody images flashed through my mind—Dune bleeding out on the rooftop and Madame slicing into Mac’s stomach in the dungeon. I forced myself to recite an entire chapter on medical annotations until I felt nothing again.
I made it a few hours before exhaustion won and pulled me under.
I woke up to the sensation of falling from the saddle and somebody shouting.
I couldn’t even try to catch myself because my damn hands were tied behind my back, so I ended up going face-first into the brush.
My chin scraped on some ice, and there was a sharp stabbing pain in my cheek.
I didn’t move, stunned and burning with humiliation, but someone yanked me up by my jacket.
Wolf glared at me, swearing under his breath.
As soon as I got my feet under me, I jerked away, only to run into Tuck— again .
He caught me by the shoulders to keep me from falling and frowned.
“She sliced open her cheek,” he said.
The concern in Tuck’s face looked real. Maybe I could manipulate him?—
A vise squeezed the air from my lungs as memories of Trey overwhelmed me.
“Lemme see.” Wolf sounded annoyed.
Tuck started to turn me by the shoulders like I wasn’t fucking capable of moving on my own.
I jerked free, flooded by the familiar queasy feeling of being surrounded by men I didn’t know—even my brother was a stranger.
I turned to Wolf just in time to see his arm moving toward my face, and I flinched.
He froze with his arm still outstretched, and my face flamed hot.
Godsdamnit, I’d gotten better at not doing that, but all this adrenaline and anxiety had me on high alert.
He pulled his arm back, and in the silence, I stared at the snowy ground, willing myself not to cry.
“Wolf,” Sable’s voice had a sharp edge.
“I know,” Wolf snapped. I heard him take a deep breath. “Lee, can you grab the kit?”
Behind him, Lee dropped his pack and dug through it to pull out a battered tin. He opened it, took out a tube of ointment, and handed it to Wolf.
“Hold still, Ember. You just about put a branch through your cheek,” Wolf said.
I looked warily at the tube in his hands, but it appeared to be some sort of sealing astringent.
He reached out, much slower this time, gripped my chin in one hand, and dabbed at the wound with a handkerchief with his other.
His hands were gentle as he applied the ointment, and that small detail almost brought all the emotion back up my throat.
I dug my fingernails into my palms hard enough to hurt and stared at the trees.
I had to remember this person wasn’t the brother who had brought me dandelions and taught me how to fight.
This person was a stranger who hated me.
I just didn’t understand why he was bothering to patch me up before he killed me.
“We better get movin’ if we’re gonna get there before nightfall,” Wolf added as he screwed the lid back on.
I couldn’t tell if he was talking to me or the others. I wanted to ask where “there” was, but I kept my mouth shut. Lee put the kit away, and my gaze locked on Wolf as he pulled out a knife.
“Turn around, I’m gonna cut the tie,” Wolf ordered.
I did as he said, trying to ignore how turning my back to him made fear prickle my skin.
Tuck and Sable stood a few feet behind me, watching, and I dropped my eyes.
Wolf cut the tie, spun me around, and then gripped my wrist, examining the red welts already forming on my skin.
He pulled my jacket sleeves down and re-bound my wrists over top of the fabric, keeping the plastic ties off my skin.
When he lifted me back onto the horse, my head was spinning for more than one reason, but at least I could cling to the saddle horn now.
I did not understand what Wolf was doing. Maybe he was playing mind games? Juck did shit like that all the time.
Pa’s words just kept echoing in my head. “Run, girl. ‘Fore Wolf tears you apart like a lil rabbit.”