22. Lindsey
22
LINDSEY
A t the end of the hall, I turn toward the kitchen to fill a kettle with water and put it on the stove for tea. What I wouldn’t give for a hard drink right now, to steady my nerves, but I won’t give in to that temptation—even if my emotions are reeling after what happened in the office. For a second there, I thought Maks might kiss me. It felt like he was going to. He was definitely close enough, and when he looked at my lips, I was sure he would. But then he didn’t, and I’m still trying to wrap my mind around my intense disappointment. I’m the one who’s trying to put distance between us. I’ve given him every indication that I’m done being his plaything.
But I would be lying if I said I don’t miss him. I miss his touch so much after just one week that it physically hurts me. Being near him only made that more apparent, and it’s painfully clear to me now that if he did try to kiss me, I would have no strength to resist him. For all my determination to walk away from him, it took next to nothing to make me realize how much I still want him—how much I’m always going to want him. It brings me back to the same question I’ve been asking myself from the beginning. Why am I so drawn to him? And is it enough to make up for all the reasons I shouldn’t want to be with him?
Icy heat rushes across my skin as my emotions war inside me, and I run the back of my wrist across my forehead as a trickle of sweat dampens my hairline. I’m not prepared for all the changes my body is starting to go through—the hormone overload, the emotional exhaustion, the hot flashes and tender breasts. The kettle starts to whistle, and I pull it off the burner and turn off the stove. With my pulse racing after that almost kiss and me suddenly overheating, I don’t need tea right now. I need a cold shower to get my body back under control. Maybe then, I can better focus on the reason I need to keep my distance from Maks, now more than ever.
Turning abruptly, I head back down the hallway toward the bedroom. My eyes drift toward the closed door of his office as I pass it. He’s probably working more on his master plan with Lucian now that he has the tickets to get into the masquerade. My pulse flutters at the thought of going to a gala with him—even if I’ll only be tagging along to witness a murder. Worrying my lip with my teeth, I glance down at my belly. I wonder how smart it really is to be getting in the middle of what could turn violent. But Maks isn’t even going to be directly involved, so we shouldn’t be in immediate danger.
Opening the bedroom door, I pull my sweater up over my head and toss it onto the bed as I make my way to the bathroom. Stepping through the archway, I stop abruptly as my heart skips a beat. I was so caught up in my thoughts about Maks and what’s supposed to take place at the gala, I didn’t notice the sound of running water. But as I stay frozen in the doorway, I’m struck by the sight before me. Maks stands in the shower, steam rising up around him as the water rains down on his broad, powerful back. He’s bowed forward, one palm pressed against the wall, his dark hair dripping down his forehead, his muscles jumping and knotting as they flex. His eyes are closed, his expression almost pained as his other hand strokes the thick, hard length of his erection.
My mouth goes dry, my pulse breaking into a sprint at the erotic sight, and I know without him telling me that it’s because he felt the same sexual tension in the office as I did. He wanted to kiss me as much as I wanted him to, and now he’s taking care of his arousal on his own because I told him I don’t want him to touch me. The tension in his face makes me think that, as much as he says he’s been getting me out of his system and that our marriage will only be temporary, he’s not as unaffected by me as he would like me to think. Heat floods my body at the realization, and my core clenches as I watch the intimate scene with stunned fascination.
There are a hundred and one reasons I shouldn’t give in to temptation, but the desire to join him is so intense, I’m stripping out of my pants and panties before I even realize what I’m doing. The wet spot in the crotch of my blue lace says just how much I want him, and my clit pulses with anticipation as I drop my bra and glasses on the pile of my clothes and step inside the shower.
Breath trapped in my throat, I kneel before him, grasping Maks’s thighs, and my heart stutters when he releases a choked grunt, his sharp blue eyes flying open. He stops his steady strokes, his fist wrapped around the base of his cock as the tendons in his neck strain with tension. Molten heat burns in his gaze, and he swallows hard as I wrap my hand around his swollen length and swirl my thumb across his thick tip.
“Lindsey,” he rasps, his voice agonized as his hips jerk forward.
“I want this,” I murmur and lean in to wrap my lips around his dripping head, licking up the salty precum.
“ Fuuuck, ” he hisses, his eyes sliding closed as he gently cups the back of my head, and when I take him slowly into my mouth, his fingers curl in my hair.
A shiver races up my spine at his deep groan of appreciation, and when his abs tighten, his hips rocking with my motion, my core starts to throb. Wet heat floods my channel, and I moan as the intensity of my arousal makes the world spin around me. Goosebumps prickle along my scalp as Maks drags the elastic from my hair and the soft strands fall across my back. Closing my eyes, I take him deeper down my throat, and my stomach flip-flops excitedly when he twitches against my tongue.
“You’re so fucking beautiful, zaya ,” Maks growls, his touch so gentle it makes me tingle.
As he lets me suck his cock the way I want to—without taking control or pushing my boundaries—a strange, quivering anticipation flutters in my stomach. I don’t know this side of Maks. I’m used to him taking charge. I’ve always been turned on by the way he does that—commanding me, controlling my pleasure as he claims me the way he wants to. And it sends a thrill through my body to realize he’s letting me set the pace this time. I’m in control.
“God, fuck ,” he moans, his cock thickening against the back of my throat as I take as much of him as I can without gagging. “If you keep doing that, I’m gonna come.”
Anticipation pools in my belly, and I squirm with the desire to play with myself.
“Fuck, Lindsey, I want to touch you so fucking bad,” Maks rasps, echoing my thoughts, and I can’t resist the temptation.
Heat hammers through my veins, and I groan as the excitement building in my core comes spilling out across my folds. Opening my eyes, I look up at Maks, watching him pointedly as I slowly release his cock with a soft pop. His tip bounces upward, nearly hitting his abdomen, he’s so hard, and I suck my lip into my mouth to savor the taste of him before I get up. Maks’s large hands take mine as he helps me to my feet, and the air is heavy with steam and the heat of anticipation as he leans toward me.
“Please, Lindsey,” he murmurs, his words whispering across my skin as his eyes ask for my permission.
My heart hammers against my ribs, as I realize he’s not going to touch me without my consent, and the sense of empowerment that gives me takes my breath away. Dizzy with need, I nod as I step into him, splaying my fingers across his strong chest. “Touch me,” I whisper.
Fierce desire consumes his chiseled face, and he cradles my cheek with one palm as his arm wraps around my waist, pulling me firmly against him. I gasp as his erection presses against my belly, making my clit throb. Then his lips seal against mine in a tender kiss. His tongue darts out, teasing the seam of my mouth, and when I wrap my arms around his neck, all my resistance—all the tension from keeping my distance—comes crashing down around me. His fingers are soft and inviting as they trail slowly down my neck and chest to curve around my breast, and he palms me gently as his thumb circles the taut flesh.
Goosebumps ripple across my skin at the way he caresses me, each movement deliberate and so tender it makes my chest ache. My lungs are screaming for oxygen when he finally breaks our kiss, and he sinks to a knee in front of me as he wraps his lips around my nipple, teasing one with his fingers and the other with his tongue. His free hand grasps my hip, his fingers pressing into my skin. I gasp as a jolt of pleasure races up my spine, my clit throbbing as he stimulates me with the lightest touch. Combing my fingers into his hair, I brush it back from his beautiful face, mesmerized by the way he seems to be worshiping my body. My breasts feel so tender and swollen, each teasing brush of his tongue makes me pulse with growing need, and I arch into him.
“ Oh my god, ” I breathe, my stomach fluttering as I climb quickly toward an orgasm before he’s even touched that part of me that’s desperate for release.
Maks hums appreciatively, the deep sound vibrating through my body as his fingers knead my sensitive flesh, and I cry out as an orgasm rips through me with astonishing force. I pant with the intensity of it and the way it hits me like a bolt out of the blue. As all the blood rushes from my head to pool between my thighs, I’m suddenly swaying on my feet. Maks’s strong hand grasps my hip more firmly, steadying me as his mouth continues to suck and tease my breast until the last pulsing waves of pleasure subside. Releasing my nipples, he looks up the length of my body, and the burning hunger in his eyes melts my core.
“God, I’ve missed that sound,” he rasps, both hands grasping my hips as he turns me so my back is pressed against the cool stone of the shower wall. Then his head dips as he brushes a soft kiss across my clit.
I whimper, pulsing desire throbbing to life between my thighs. Maks isn’t holding back at all this time. It feels like he’s determined to wring every last drop of pleasure from my body, and I’m so eager for relief, I’m powerless to stop it. I don’t doubt that I’ll regret letting down my walls again, when it was so painful to put them up, but right now, all I can think about is the pleasure only Maks can give me. So when he takes my knee, hooking it over his shoulder, I willingly let him spread my legs as he kneels between my thighs. Electricity crackles up my spine as his tongue parts my folds, delving into me. His agonized groan vibrates against my flesh, making me gasp and my walls clench.
“You’re so fucking wet for me, zaya ,” he murmurs, his hot breath rushing across my oversensitive flesh, and my leg still holding me up nearly buckles as our eyes meet between my breasts.
Swallowing hard, I nod and lick my lips as I stare down at the single sexiest man I’ve ever met. Maks kneeling before me, his fingers indenting my skin as he holds me upright, his lips whispering across my clit as he looks up at me makes my pulse spike, and I release a shaky breath to try and calm my racing heart. Then he wraps his lips around my sensitive bundle of nerves, and I see stars as he starts to gently suck.
Mewling with pleasure, I tremble uncontrollably in his hands, each throbbing pulse washing through me like a tidal wave. I writhe against his hot mouth as he lashes his tongue across my oversensitive flesh. He’s not teasing me at all tonight. He’s chasing my pleasure, driving my arousal with deliberation, granting me every orgasm he deprived me of the last time we were together, and when he slides two fingers inside my hot channel, I completely fall apart.
“Fuck—Maks, fuck !” I scream, my walls clenching around the slow, steady penetration as I urge him deeper inside me.
His fingers curl, coaxing my orgasm to new heights as he thrusts in rhythm with my pulsing release, and I pant, my grip tightening on the roots of his hair as I ride the molten euphoria. Trembling uncontrollably, I lean heavily against the wall as my spine tingles. My legs feel like noodles, and without Maks’s firm grip on my hip, I know I would be on the shower floor.
With a hum of approval, he releases the suction on my clit and slowly lowers my foot to the ground before coming to a stand. My fingers slip from his wet locks as he towers over me, my body so weak with relief it’s all I can do to stay upright, and my heart flutters as he traps me against the shower wall with his arms.
“I love it when you scream my name,” he purrs, grasping my chin and tipping it up until our lips meet.
I can taste the tang of my arousal on his tongue, and my stomach knots with fresh anticipation as his hips rock forward, trapping his swollen cock between us.
“I want you,” I breathe against his lips, and when I reach down to grip his hard length, a low growl rumbles from his chest.
Heat crawls up my spine as Maks grasps my thighs, lifting me effortlessly as he wraps my legs around his waist and pins me against the wall with his hips.
“Put me where you want me,” he says as a bead of precum trickles down his shaft and onto my fingers.
I’m desperate to feel him bare inside me—it’s a craving I haven’t been able to shake since that first time, and now that the damage is done, I can’t resist the temptation. It’s not like I can get any more pregnant from not using a condom. Adjusting my hips, I guide his swollen tip between my folds and line him up with my throbbing entrance.
Maks presses forward, sliding inside me, and I gasp at the burst of pleasure that explodes through my veins.
“ Fuck, ” Maks groans as he buries his face against the curve of my neck, and my pulse hammers against his lips.
He rocks slowly inside me, and my skin ignites as I feel each glorious inch of him pressing deep into my depths. Goosebumps prickle across my flesh as he holds me close, sliding into me and back out with such tenderness it brings tears to my eyes. After all the sex we’ve had, this time, it feels like something more. Maybe it’s how gentle he’s being, or maybe it’s the knowledge that I’m carrying his child. Whatever the reason, it makes me want to be with him so much more—but that might not be enough. I need to decide what’s right for my baby, and as much as I might wish otherwise, that means living a life far from Maks. But that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy tonight with him. If I’m going to live without him, at least I want this as a lasting memory to keep with me when I go.
A dark, throbbing ache swells in my core, an overwhelming need to have all of him, to feel him flood my body with his cum, and I know I’m in trouble because, when I’m with Maks, enough is never enough. I want him to come inside me, to claim me for his own because he never wants to let me go. But I know him well enough to understand that’s not what this is. The way he’s fucking me so gently feels dangerously close to making love, and it tears my heart to shreds.
“Come for me, little rabbit,” he murmurs against my throat, and he trails kisses up the sensitive curve until his lips brush the shell of my ear. “I want to feel you soak my cock.”
Fuck. The way he talks dirty to me is so damn hot, and each slow, tantalizing penetration is driving me crazy, rattling the dark thoughts loose from my mind. His deep thrusts release fireworks behind my eyelids, and as he grinds against my clit, electricity dances up my spine.
“Maks!” I whimper as I ripple around him, and as he presses inside me to the hilt, I topple into oblivion.
He stills inside me, a soft moan vibrating from him as if he’s savoring me coming on his cock. My walls throb, milking his hard length as I tremble in his arms. Gasping for air, I let my head fall back against the shower wall as we stay locked together, and only after the last of my aftershocks subside does Maks ease out of me and carefully lower me back to the ground.