Chapter Nineteen
Audra’s temper fizzled through breakfast. Because Copeland was very clearly not welcome, but he settled himself at the table and filled in everyone on what had happened in a very matter-of-fact police way that didn’t leave much room for Rosalie or Franny to overreact too, too much.
And she knew that was by design, not accident. He was trying to help, even when he was doing what she expressly wished he wouldn’t.
She didn’t know how to fight him. He was too…reasonable. Too fair. And she didn’t know how to stay angry with him when he did things like sit at the breakfast table with just about everyone she loved and weather their hostility like it didn’t matter to him in the slightest.
Which was something he probably dealt with at work plenty. Not everyone liked the law poking around, and not everyone liked what a detective might find. She could sit here and try to convince herself that was all it was—work.
But it wasn’t.
“Whether she wanted to or not, Karly made it pretty clear Austin is our culprit. Or could be. We’re working on tracking him down, seeing if we can prove it,” Copeland explained in patient cop tones. “There’s a lot of anger and bitterness there, so it tracks.”
“Wow, they’re so unique,” Rosalie muttered, stabbing at her eggs. “Bitterness. Anger. Over our SOB of a dad. Weird how I didn’t think to take it out on the random kids we didn’t know he had.”
Those words settled into Audra differently, because hadn’t she essentially said the same to Karly? They were the same. They were all victims of their father.
But the anger and bitterness she’d felt from Karly was geared toward her, toward the ranch. Not the situation. Not Tim Young.
With Rosalie back home, something about the entire interaction with Karly suddenly had a far more discordant note. Pretending someone didn’t exist didn’t mesh with anger. Anger was born of time and offense and hurt.
Then again, there’d been time—all these years—to nurture that hurt, so maybe it made sense, even if Audra didn’t feel the same. Not everyone was going to react to betrayal in the same way.
But something was chewing at her, deep in the pit of her stomach. She’d make sense of it, but she needed…work. Cold air, animals, physical labor. Some alone time.
“I’d better get started on chores,” Audra said, pushing back from the table. She wanted to clear the table, clean up after breakfast, but chores were more pressing and—
Duncan and Copeland stood, like they were some kind of partnered unit. Without even discussing it, they blocked her path.
“Duncan and I can handle it,” Copeland said, like he spoke for her newly minted brother-in-law. And he must, because Duncan stood next to Copeland looking like just the same kind of brick wall.
“But—”
“Catch up with your family,” Copeland said. Ordered. “And lock the door behind us.”
She would have argued. She would have told him where to shove it, but he simply stepped forward, pressed a hard kiss to her mouth, then walked away, like that was that and he just got to…tell her what to do.
And kiss her in front of everyone.
She stood there, frozen with irritation and embarrassment and…something a lot warmer and nicer than those two things. But the darker emotions felt easier. Safer.
So why were the warmer, nicer ones winning?
“See?” Franny said, gesturing at Rosalie once the men were out of earshot.
Rosalie only scowled as she moved forward and locked the door.
“See what?” Audra demanded.
“You need someone bossy,” Franny said with complete sincerity. “And hot. Copeland fits the bill.”
“Bossy is obnoxious,” Rosalie muttered before Audra could think of something to say.
They were moving around her. Everyone was taking over, and Audra simply didn’t know what to do. It was like she was stuck in some vortex, some alternate reality, where she wasn’t the one holding everything together.
“You say that because you’re the bossy one in your relationship,” Franny retorted as she began to clear the table.
Rosalie scoffed.
“Duncan’s a marshmallow for you,” Audra addeed with just a hint of wistfulness, unable to stop herself.
Then she grabbed the rest of the dirty dishes and walked over to the sink.
She wasn’t going to be…helpless, frozen, vortexed.
This was her life, her family, her ranch.
She’d always been in charge of all those things.
Always.
“Oh, Duncan’s plenty bossy.” Rosalie wiggled her eyebrows until Franny and Audra were laughing, and it felt good. For her sister and cousin to be home. To be laughing.
But… She wasn’t in control, and she didn’t know what to do with that feeling. Except wrestling some of it back. She bumped Franny away from the sink. “You must be exhausted, rushing home. Why don’t you go unpack and rest?”
“It was hardly a rush or a sacrifice. I can go back and visit my parents anytime, Audra.” Franny bumped her right back out of the way. And then Rosalie slid in between them, like she was going to fight Audra off.
So Audra started in on her campaign to get Rosalie out of here. “I hope you know you don’t have to stay here, and Duncan certainly doesn’t need to help with my chores. Your house is just a stone’s throw away. Franny’s home and—”
“And you’ve got a detective cozied up in your bed?” Rosalie interrupted, arms crossed over her chest, expression somewhere between disapproving and assessing.
Audra wasn’t sure what was going to happen now that everyone was back. She’d try to get Copeland to leave too. She’d have to convince him that she was well taken care of now, and he didn’t need to be here twenty-four seven.
She didn’t want to.
Which made saying the rest hard, but she’d swallow her pride if it got her sister living her very nice life over worrying about Audra’s. “If it’ll get you to go home and stop putting yourself out for me, he can stay here.”
Rosalie rolled her eyes. “He can stay here, my butt. You couldn’t get him out of here at gunpoint. Or you would have by now.”
Audra opened her mouth to argue with Rosalie, but she couldn’t find the words.
Because she was a little too scared that she was letting her personal feelings for Copeland undermine all the strength she’d built up these past few years, which had been scary enough on its own, but with her family back it felt… dangerous.
Everything was flying out of control, and Audra needed to find a way to center it all, anchor it all, before…
Before something.
Maybe if she convinced everyone to leave her alone, she could accomplish something and feel more in control.
“I’m so glad you’re both back,” Audra said, forcing some cheer into her voice.
“I wish you hadn’t closed out your trips early, but it’s good to have you home.
And since you are, I just… I haven’t had a moment to myself in days.
I… I just need some alone time. To think things through.
Copeland’s been all up on this twenty-four-seven nonsense, and I haven’t had a moment to myself. ”
She smiled hopefully at Franny, who kept her head bent and focused on washing the dishes. So she turned to Rosalie, who was scowling.
“How about this, just this once, for the slightest change, you try to talk it through, instead of isolating yourself and thinking through a problem without any help. I’m a private investigator, Audra. This is my job. I’m your sister. This is my family.”
Maybe it was Karly firmly rejecting those terms—sister, family—that had Audra relenting. Because she liked to think she could maneuver Rosalie when she wanted to, but not when Rosalie sounded hurt. Not when there was someone who wanted to be her sister.
She let out a long breath. Maybe it was only fair to give Rosalie this, even if Audra wanted to handle it herself. Even if she wanted…
What the hell do you want, Audra? She felt like Copeland Beckett had swept into her life—on her own invitation—and jumbled it all up.
But Rosalie tugged on her arm, nudged her into a seat at the table. “I want to hear the whole story. The real story. From your point of view.” Rosalie went to a drawer, pulled out a little notebook and a pen. “This might be Copeland’s case, but it’s mine now too.”
“And once we’re done with that,” Franny said, settling herself on Audra’s other side, “you can share the details on just what twenty-four seven with Copeland Beckett entails.”
“It entails Copeland Beckett in his underwear in her bed this morning,” Rosalie grumbled, clearly disgusted.
“Ooh,” Franny said, clearly not disgusted.
The juxtaposition almost made Audra smile.
“First things first. Start at the beginning. No leaving things out to keep me from worrying. I’m worried. There’s no more or less.”
Audra really didn’t want to, but it was clear Copeland wasn’t going to let her minimize this to Rosalie, and Rosalie would get the details out of someone, one way or another. So Audra had no choice but to relent.
Which left her feeling…exhausted and like a failure. Something she was so tired of. So…over.
What if you stopped blaming yourself for everything?
She wanted to laugh, because the voice in her head sounded far too much like Copeland blaming her for being a martyr.
Because she was. Because… Because by handling everything these past four years, she’d built her life on the crumbling foundation of her father’s lies, and it wasn’t earning her any awards.
What if she could…use this as a new starting point? What if she could…think about change, about leaning instead of all the holding tight that hadn’t really served her?
It was terrifying, but she started with the very small step of telling Rosalie and Franny everything from the beginning, without glossing over things. Without downplaying or insisting it was fine.
Franny was gripping her arm by the time she got to the fire, and Rosalie looked like she was going to start throwing punches, but Audra forced herself to keep going. All the way to Karly’s arrival and her interaction with their half sister.