Chapter 30 – Alex
Chapter Thirty
ALEX
The door swings wide, and the impostor queen saunters in. “Alexander, did you enjoy my gift?”
“Go away,” I grunt.
The smoke finally dissipated some hours ago, but the craving remains. All the hard work I’ve done to clear myself of vespira, gone in an instant.
“I expected a thank you,” she croons, crossing the room and taking a seat in one of the chairs. “I plucked that longing right out of your mind. It was nearly as strong as your longing for her.” A slight sneer crosses her face, but she smoothes it.
Guilt at my weakness guts me. One idiotic decision made months ago has given the queen the power to ruin me. This is my fault.
“Have you broken her curse?” I ask, the tiniest bit of hope lighting the shredded remains of my soul. I need some good news.
“I’m afraid not,” the queen says calmly.
“Why the hells not?”
“Dearest little Seraphine is not here. I can hardly free her if she’s not around for me to do so.”
“You told me she was in a cage,” I growl.
Her lips curl. “She is in a cage of her own design. She took on that curse willingly.”
“You tricked me!”
“In a manner of speaking.” She shrugs. “As I said, I will do anything I can to free her, but it’s a little hard to do when she’s not here.”
“Where is she?”
Another shrug. “My hunters are searching for her as we speak.”
“Hunters?”
A wicked smile. “Death will surely free her from her curse, no?”
“That is not what we agreed to, and you know it!” I shout.
“You should know better than to bargain in the land of the fae,” the queen replies. “Perhaps I was wrong about her. I thought, since you are her mate, she’d have come to your aid by now, but no. She’s abandoned you.”
I don’t want to believe her, but I also need to look the truth in the face.
Sera isn’t here. She never even deigned to tell me I was her mate to begin with.
The queen’s words worm their way into my mind, attempting to burrow deep, but the faintest warning buzz in the back of my mind resists.
That’s not like Sera. Surely she will do something to help me.
Maybe she’s trying to find Kian and Rae?
I shake my head, fighting off a wave of nausea.
“Come here, Alexander,” the queen says, and I find myself moving to her against my will. “Kneel,” she commands, and I sink onto the small rug in front of her, loathing every moment of her control.
She rubs a hand over my head, petting me like a dog, and I want to put my hands around her neck and squeeze.
“Ah, ah, ah, none of that,” she says. “Not unless you really want to play.”
Bile rises up my throat, and I press my eyes shut.
“I have a gift for you.”
I’m almost afraid to ask, but she withdraws a small sachet from a pocket in her dress and waves it in front of my nose.
“I don’t want it.”
“You can try to lie to me, Alexander, but I’ll have you know, it won’t work.”
Without another word, she rises, leaving the sachet behind on the chair. I’m frozen in place. The subtle scent tickles my nose, and I stare at it with hatred. Longing. The queen asked for my soul, and she took it. There is nothing left.
To my relief, the queen hasn’t filled my room with vespira root vapors again.
That doesn’t do anything to stop the craving burning through me every minute of every day though.
It’s stronger here than back home. It’s worse.
Every meal, another packet of vespira is left with my plate, along with a wooden pipe.
A taunting, teasing torture. I’d rather she beat me bloody than attempt to destroy my body with the one thing I’ve been trying to fight.
I stare out the closed window, looking at the suns peeking behind the clouds. Like twins, they move through the sky, showing the slow passage of time. Sera is out there somewhere. She has to be all right. Did she find somewhere safe to hide? Have Rae and Kian come to help her?
I tug on the window again, longing for fresh air, for something to get my mind off the vespira screaming my name.
Once more, I’m reminded that all of my progress is gone.
Wasted in a moment when my weak mind couldn’t keep the queen out.
If only I had defeated this wretched addiction for good, perhaps it couldn’t have been used against me.
Despair and self-loathing threaten to pull me under.
It’s for the best Sera abandoned me. I would have only dragged her down, destroyed her too.
“Alexander.” The queen’s velvety voice curls around me like a noose and tightens. I want to fight the control she has over me, but it’s harder than I thought it would be. She lets out a sound of aggravation. “Look at me.”
My body isn’t my own when it turns to face her.
“Good boy,” she praises, and I want to throw up.
She takes a few steps closer, her eyes flicking toward the unopened packets of vespira root on the table. I instantly realize my mistake. I should have disposed of them, but the hold they have . . .
“What, you haven’t enjoyed the gifts I’ve been sending you?” she asks. “Perhaps I should take them back.”
No! my craving screams, and I stiffen, but I can’t let her win. I can’t let her continue to destroy me. “If you must,” I say, trying to sound casual.
A knowing smile lights her eyes. “Do I need to make you enjoy my gifts, Alexander? Don’t even think of lying to me.”
I shake my head. “I’m still experiencing the effects of the last dose.
” Not truly a lie. The craving has been eating me alive.
There’s a prickle in my mind, as if she’s prodding around, and I squeeze my hands into fists, allowing the craving to overwhelm my thoughts, to let her feel the control she’s taken.
The queen rolls her shoulders back and straightens, looking far too pleased with herself.
The sensation subsides, and I try not to show my relief.
If only there was a way to keep her out or to only show her what I want her to see.
I never thought I’d need to learn to protect my mind from an evil enchantress queen.
Unlocked by my thoughts, a memory of my father surfaces.
I vaguely recall him discussing mind-training techniques when I was a young boy to evade truth-sayers during interrogations.
People can learn how to protect their minds, but that also means truth-sayers have to learn how to beat those skills.
My father could have surely kept her out.
I wish I had paid more attention. Perhaps I can learn though.
“Come with me,” the queen says, and my blood runs cold. I suspect this isn’t something I will enjoy.
Like a string pulling me from my navel, I’m drawn forward. When I follow willingly, the leash slackens. I need to pretend. I need to play along, then hopefully I can figure out how to block some of this control.
The queen leads me back down through the palace until we reach a hallway I’m familiar with. She’s leading me to her chambers. Shit. She could literally force me to do anything, and my stomach churns at the thought of it.
I keep my eyes open for something that might give me an edge, but I don’t even know what I’m looking for.
Movement catches my eye, and I think I spy a small furry creature darting behind a tapestry. Odd.
There are guards in front of the queen’s rooms, and they open the door for us when we approach.
My body is on high alert as we enter the scene of that disastrous breakfast, and I grow even more tense when she leads me toward another door. If this enchantress brings me to her bedchamber, I will gladly put a dagger through my chest. The thought of her taking my body like that is unthinkable.
The queen guides me into a dark room, and while I’m relieved at first not to spy a bed, the temperature drops dramatically, causing a sense of unease.
With a snap of her fingers, candles blaze to life, revealing a large reflective gilded frame, face up on a round table in the center of the room.
I can’t tell if it’s glass or water, but there’s an ominous air to it and this entire space.
The walls are draped in black velvet, and the only light comes from the candles that circle the room.
There are shelves covered in bottles to the right, and to the left, I spy a variety of blades. Oh hells, I do not want to be here.
The queen walks to the table and peers into the reflective surface. “Seraphine has been quite adept at evading my hunters this past week,” she says. “I need something of hers to make my scrying more effective.”
I stiffen, even as a swell of relief rushes through me. “I’m not hers,” I croak, hating myself for the words about to come out of my mouth. “I’m yours now.”
An ugly sneer twists the queen’s lips. “While you aren’t completely wrong, you are still her mate and the closest thing I have to something that matters to her.”
Thoughts of Sera and all the things we’ve never said cause the ache in my chest to throb.
The queen clucks her tongue. “As I’ve said, I thought she would have tried to come to you by now, but perhaps I’m overestimating how much she values you.”
Her words pierce my heart like daggers, another reminder of just how unworthy I am.
“Be that as it may,” she continues, “I cannot allow her to wander this realm unchecked.”
I bite my tongue. The last thing I need is to argue with her. She has her mind made up about Sera, and I’m clearly not going to change it. Even if Sera has no plans to claim her birthright, it’s more than obvious that this power-hungry queen needs to be overthrown.
“Come,” she commands.
I join her at the giant mirror-like surface, and she runs a finger over it. It ripples and changes, the reflection no longer showing us but a murky and cloudy plane.
“Give me your hand.”
My hand shoots toward her, and she slices her sharp fingernail across my palm before I can blink. The pain is brief, but my hand burns when she not so gently squeezes it. Blood drips down and hisses as it hits the surface.
The queen starts to chant in an unfamiliar tongue, and the surface churns like it’s angry. My gaze is glued to it. I can’t look away as the haze clears and familiar eyes stare right through me.
Longing and fear clench in my chest, and I want to cry out and tell her to run, to leave me here. She’s not safe.
“Where are you, Seraphine?” the enchantress fumes, angered that the picture isn’t growing clearer. “What trickery is this?” she screams, ruining the image of Sera’s face with a swipe of her hand through the surface.