Chapter 32
Ian
Iwait until I’m sure Julia is deeply asleep before I extract myself from the bed.
It takes every ounce of willpower I have to leave her there, warm and satisfied and smelling like me, but I manage.
I let myself out the front door and drive home with the windows down, the cold November air doing nothing to ease the ache in my groin.
The cabin feels bigger than usual when I walk in. I built this place for a family, and tonight, I can finally see one filling it. I strip off my clothes and climb into the shower, cranking the water as hot as I can stand it.
I last about thirty seconds before I give in and wrap my hand around my cock.
I’m already leaking, and the first stroke makes me groan loud enough to echo off the tiles.
I brace one arm against the wall and let myself think about everything I’ve been trying not to think about over the past couple months.
Julia’s taste. The quiet little rabbit sounds she made when she came.
The way she looked at me afterward, like she wanted to eat me up even though she could barely keep her eyes open.
I imagine her here with me in the shower, the water bouncing off her belly. I imagine dropping to my knees and burying my face between her thighs, licking until she screams. I imagine sliding inside her and feeling her walls flutter around my knot as I fill her up.
I imagine her in my bed. Not for a night, not for a week, but forever. Waking up beside her every morning. Reading to our pups. Singing lullabies. Growing old together, gray-muzzled and happy.
My release hits me like a freight train, and I howl, the sound ragged as it echoes off the tiles. I come so hard my knees nearly buckle, and I slide to the floor after my seed washes down the drain.
It’s so intense and I’m so godsdamned happy, I feel lightheaded. Drunk on lust and possibility. A giddy laugh bursts out of me, one that goes on and on until I can’t breathe. I must look crazy, howling at the moon and laughing like a hyena.
When I can breathe again, I clean up and drag myself to bed. The sheets smell faintly of Julia from the last time she stayed here. I bury my face in the pillow and finally, finally fall asleep.
The phone wakes me at nine the next morning. It’s Julia, and my heart leaps before I even answer.
“Hey, pretty girl. How’d you sleep?”
A sniffle comes through the line, and my stomach drops.
“Julia? What’s wrong?”
“I’m at the grocery store.” Her voice is thick with tears. “I was trying to restock Heidi and Nicole’s pantry as a thank-you for letting me stay, and my credit card got declined. All of them. My debit card too. The store took them and won’t give them back. I think Richard reported them stolen.”
Red-hot fury floods my veins. That vindictive piece of shit.
He couldn’t stand to let her leave with any dignity at all.
Well, the mother of my children is not going to stand in a grocery store in tears because her asshole soon-to-be-ex-husband decided to be petty. I take a breath, reining in my anger.
“Don’t worry about it, I’ve got you.” I force my voice to stay calm even though I want to punch something. She’s still crying and apologizing, and I want to reach through the phone and hold her. “Sweetheart, put the cashier on the phone.”
There’s a shuffling sound, and then a new voice comes on the line. “Hello?”
“Hi there. I’m going to give you my credit card number to pay for whatever the lady has in her cart.”
I rattle off the digits, wait for the authorization, and thank the cashier before asking to be passed back to Julia.
“It’s taken care of,” I tell her. “You okay?”
“I’ll pay you back. I don’t know when, but I will, I promise.”
“Don’t worry about it. Just go home, put away the groceries, and have some tea or something so you can relax before work. I’ll check on you this evening after your shift.”
“I’m so sorry I had to call you,” she sniffles.
“Don’t you dare be sorry. You did exactly the right thing, okay? Always call me. Always, Julia. Promise me.”
After I extract her promise and her groceries are bagged, we hang up, and I throw my phone across the room. It bounces off the sofa cushion, which is lucky for me, because I’m not in control of my strength right now.
I pace the living room like it’s a cage, my tail lashing. Apparently, Richard is going to make her life hell. He has the money and the connections to do it, and she has nothing. No job that pays enough to live on. No family in the country. No resources except what her friends can spare.
And me. Everything I have is hers, too.
The thought crystallizes into determination. I can’t murder Richard, not if I want to stay out of jail and see my pups grow up. And I can’t fix her whole life. But I can make sure she has a safe place to land, whenever she’s ready.
I spend the rest of the day preparing her room.
Not the guest room, but the master bedroom.
I wash the sheets and fluff the pillows.
I clear out the closet and empty the dresser drawers.
I stock the bathroom with girly stuff and the kitchen with dairy-free snacks and the prenatal vitamins Helena recommended.
I’m not trying to pressure her. I just want her to know that this is her space. She belongs here in the home I built for our family. If she wants me in her bed, I’ll be there, but it’s her house now.
By evening, I’m exhausted but satisfied. The room looks good. It’s ready for her. When I talk to her later, I’ll try to work it into the conversation in a low-pressure way.
But before I can text her, my phone rings. The number is unfamiliar, but it’s a local landline, so I answer.
“Ian?” Julia’s voice is stretched thin. “It’s me.”
Dread coils in my gut. “What happened? Where are you?”
“I’m at the bookstore still. My car got repossessed from the parking lot while I was working. And my phone was shut off. I tried to call you, but it wouldn’t go through.” She laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “Richard’s really pulling out all the stops, isn’t he?”
I’m already grabbing my keys. “I’m on my way. Don’t move.”
The drive to Dog-Eared Pages usually takes twenty minutes. I make it in twelve.
Julia is waiting on the bench outside the store, her arms wrapped around herself against the cold. She’s surprisingly calm when I pull up, climbing into the Jeep without a word.
“Are you okay?” I ask, searching her face.
“I expected something like this.” She buckles her seatbelt with steady hands. “This is how Richard operates. When he feels like he’s losing control, he tries to take everything away so you have no choice but to come crawling back to him. But I’m not going back.”
“Damn right you’re not.” My hands white-knuckle on the steering wheel. “Don’t worry about him. We’re going to fix this.”
“How? I don’t have a car or a phone or any money. I can’t even pay for my own groceries.”
“First things first, I’m adding you to my plan.” I pull up the app on my phone and walk her through the steps to add her device to my account. It only takes a couple of minutes, and her phone has service again. “You can’t keep the same number, but at least you can make calls.”
She blinks back some tears. “Thank you, Ian.”
“I’m also adding you to my credit card account. The card should arrive in a few days, but I’ve got some cash for you in the meantime.” I grab an envelope from the glove compartment and hand it to her.
She opens it and her eyes go wide. “I can’t take this much!”
“Use it for whatever you need. And before you argue with me, think about the pups. They need their mother to have food and safe transportation and a roof over her head. This isn’t charity on my part. I’m providing for my children.”
She’s quiet for a long moment, and I can see the war playing out on her face. She feels guilty accepting my help, but she knows it’s the right thing to do.
Finally, she tucks the envelope into her purse. “Thank you.”
I reach over to hold her hand. We drive in silence, her small fingers intertwined with mine. I want to take her back to my cabin and wrap her in blankets and never let her out of my sight. But she needs more time to process everything that’s happened.
I pull into her cul-de-sac, where Heidi and Nicole’s purple Victorian looks like a beacon of warmth against the encroaching winter darkness. It’s no wonder Julia feels safe with them here. As much as I want to take her to our home, I get why she wants to be here right now.
“I wonder how long it’s going to be before they get tired of me,” she jokes.
“I have a feeling they’d let you stay forever if you wanted to.”
She laughs. “No way! Nicole’s only tolerating me in her TV room because the regular season is over and the NCAA tournament hasn’t started yet. If I’m nursing triplets on her couch during the bowl games, she’ll have something to say about it.”
“She’s a college football fan, I take it?”
“That’s putting it mildly.”
“Well, the cabin has a room for you whenever you want it.” I keep my eyes on the front door of their house. “One for the pups, too. No pressure. Just a reminder that it’s half yours. You’ve got a key.”
Her hand squeezes mine. “I know. I think… I’ll be ready soon.”
My heart squeezes so hard, it hurts. “Will you be okay tonight?”
“I’ll be fine.” She leans over and kisses my cheek. “Thanks for coming to get me. And for everything else.”
“Any time.”
I watch her walk inside, phone clutched in her hand, and wait until the door closes behind her before I drive away. Richard might be able to take her car and her credit cards and her phone service, but he can’t take me.