Chapter 14 #2
And honestly? Part of me found it endearing that he’d cared enough to keep track of me, even when we were apart.
But there was something else I needed to know. Something that had been nagging at me since we’d gotten back together.
“Can I ask you something else?” I said, my voice quieter now.
“Anything,” Ryder said immediately.
I took a breath, trying to figure out how to phrase this. “Have you... dated anyone? Or been with anyone? In the last five years?”
I saw understanding dawn in his eyes, and he reached across the table to take my hand. “You mean since you know I dated and was still a virgin until you?”
I nodded, feeling vulnerable. I knew he’d seen me with that guy at the college party five years ago, the one who’d been hitting on me. And I’d dated a few people during my time in Europe, though nothing serious. But I didn’t know what Ryder had done in that time.
Ryder’s face flushed, and he looked almost embarrassed. “I haven’t been with anyone since that girl you saw me with five years ago.”
I stared at him in shock. “What? Ryder, that was five years ago.”
“I know.” He squeezed my hand. “But Em, it really wasn’t that bad. I couldn’t even stand another female touching me. I wouldn’t have been able to get it up.”
I couldn’t help it—I laughed. The image of Ryder, the powerful Alpha, unable to perform because he was so hung up on me was both ridiculous and incredibly sweet.
“Wow,” I managed to say between laughs.
Ryder smiled, but there was something sad in his eyes.
“I channeled all that energy into work. Into making the pack stronger, into making the world safer for you.”
He paused, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of my hand.
“I figured it was the Moon Goddess’s punishment for me, since I tried to reject you.”
The laughter died in my throat, replaced by a familiar ache. I gave him a sad smile, hating that he still carried that guilt, hating that I still felt the hurt of that rejection even though I understood why he’d done it.
“Ryder—”
“I deserved it,” he said firmly, his eyes locked on mine. “And I’m going to spend the rest of our lives showing you how much I love you and that I deserve you.”
I felt tears prick at my eyes, and I squeezed his hand back. “You already do. You already show me every day.”
“Not enough,” he said softly. “It’ll never be enough to make up for the time we lost.”
We finished dinner in a more subdued mood, though not an unhappy one. There was something healing about these conversations, about finally addressing all the hurt and misunderstandings that had kept us apart.
After we paid the bill—Ryder insisted, despite my protests—we walked out into the warm evening air. Pinewood was bustling with activity, and I realized there must be some kind of festival going on.
“Want to walk around for a bit?” Ryder asked, pulling me close to his side.
“I’d love that,” I said.
We walked through the streets of Pinewood, and I was struck by how much things had changed while also staying the same.
Some of the storefronts had been updated with fresh paint and new signs.
There were a few new shops I didn’t recognize—a boutique clothing store, a fancy coffee shop, a bookstore that looked cozy and inviting.
But the bones of the town were the same. The same streets I’d walked as a kid, the same buildings I’d passed on my way to school, the same sense of community that had always made Pinewood feel like home.
The festival was in full swing, with people everywhere—families with children, couples holding hands, groups of teenagers laughing and joking. There was an outdoor market set up in the town square, with vendors selling everything from handmade jewelry to local produce to baked goods.
And in the center of it all, there was a live band playing on a small stage, their music filling the air with upbeat, joyful melodies.
Several couples were dancing in front of the stage, swaying to the music, and I found myself smiling at the sight.
Then Ryder was pulling me forward, leading me right to the front of the crowd.
“Ryder, what are you—”
“Dance with me,” he said, and it wasn’t a question.
He pulled me into his arms, one hand on my waist and the other holding mine, and we started to sway to the music. I wrapped my free arm around his neck, letting him lead, and felt myself relax into his embrace.
It was perfect.
The music, the warm evening air, the feeling of being in Ryder’s arms—all of it combined to create this moment that felt almost magical. I rested my head against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, and felt completely at peace.
We danced through two songs, just holding each other and moving to the music, and I wished we could stay like this forever.
Eventually, though, the band took a break, and we decided to walk around the market.
We stopped at various booths, looking at handmade crafts and local artwork.
Ryder bought me a delicate silver bracelet from one vendor, insisting on clasping it around my wrist himself.
We picked up some homemade jam and honey from another booth, and some handcrafted soaps that smelled amazing.
The last booth we stopped at happened to be run by someone I recognized.
“Oh my God! Emily!”
I looked up to see Kat standing behind the table, her face lit up with excitement. She looked exactly the same as I remembered—curly red hair, bright green eyes, a smattering of freckles across her nose.
“Kat!” I said, smiling as we hugged each other over the table.
I hadn’t spoken to Kat in a while. We’d been close in high school—she’d been one of the friends I’d made after Ryder left—but we’d just lost touch as life went on. I’d gone to Europe, she’d stayed in Pinewood, and our lives had taken different paths.
Kat pulled back and looked at me, her eyes taking in every detail. Then her gaze shifted to Ryder, who was standing beside me with his hand on my lower back, and she smiled knowingly.
Kat and I had become friends after Ryder left, but I’d told her about him. About the boy I’d loved, about the heartbreak of him leaving, about the complicated feelings I still carried.
“Kat, this is Ryder,” I said, gesturing between them. “Ryder, this is Kat. We were friends in high school.”
Kat nodded at Ryder, and then gave me a look that clearly said, So this is him.
I felt my cheeks heat, but I just smiled back.
“I’m so happy you’re back,” Kat said, her voice warm and genuine. “We should get together sometime. Catch up properly.”
“Yes, we should,” I agreed immediately. “I’d love that.”
We exchanged phone numbers, promising to set something up soon. I learned that Kat ran a bakery out of her house now, which explained the booth full of delicious-looking baked goods.
“These look amazing,” I said, eyeing the display of cupcakes and cookies.
“Try one,” Kat insisted, pushing a sample toward me.
I took a bite of a chocolate cupcake and nearly moaned. It was incredible—moist and rich, with the perfect amount of frosting.
“Kat, this is so good,” I said around my mouthful.
She beamed. “Thanks! It’s my grandma’s recipe.”
We ended up buying a box of assorted cupcakes and cookies, with Kat insisting on giving us extra because she was “so happy to see me again.”
“We’ll definitely get together soon,” I promised as we said goodbye. “I’ll text you.”
“You better,” Kat said, giving me one more hug. “It’s really good to see you, Em.”
As Ryder and I walked away from the booth, I felt a warmth in my chest. It was nice to reconnect with old friends, to be reminded that I had a life here in Pinewood beyond just Ryder and the pack.
The drive home was nice and quiet, both of us content to just be together without needing to fill the silence with conversation. I held the box of baked goods in my lap and watched the scenery pass by, feeling more relaxed than I had in days.
When we got back to the packhouse, Ryder parked the car and we walked up to our apartment, his arm around my shoulders, mine around his waist.
Once we were inside, Ryder turned to me, his expression soft. “I hope you had a nice time tonight.”
“It was the best date ever,” I said honestly. Then I grinned, unable to resist adding, “Probably because you didn’t sabotage it like my past dates.”
Ryder’s face flushed with embarrassment, and he rubbed the back of his neck. “Um, yeah. Sorry about that. But also...not sorry.”
I burst out laughing. “You’re terrible.”
“I’m possessive,” he corrected, pulling me against him. “There’s a difference.”
“Is there though?” I teased.
Instead of answering, he kissed me. And this kiss was different from the heated ones earlier—this was slow and tender, full of love and promise.
When we finally made it to the bedroom, we took our time with each other. There was no urgency, no desperate need. Just slow, tender lovemaking that left me feeling cherished and loved and completely satisfied.
As I drifted off to sleep in Ryder’s arms, I thought about how perfect the night had been. How perfect my life was becoming.
And I couldn’t wait to see what came next.