Chapter Seventeen #3
Her alpha’s gaze fell to the space between them. The garage fell quiet besides the whoosh of the summer wind through the garage bay and the rumble of cars in the street.
“When?” he asked, a bit of gloom feathering his voice, just like when he heard of Michael’s death.
“Not sure. He still has to get the finances and make arrangements. He said a couple of weeks, maybe.”
Gage nodded thoughtfully as if he mentally calculated the time and the steps Shane would need to take. He was calculating how much time they would have left with her.
“You love him?”
She smiled, knowing she didn’t have to think too much about that answer. “I do.”
“Have you told him?”
“Not yet, but I will. We’re going to meet up tonight after the alpha meeting.”
She had other plans for that night with Shane, but Gage didn’t need to know about them.
He let out a sigh and pushed himself to his feet. “Then, it sounds like you already know what you should do.” He picked up his tools and made his way to one of the large red tool caddies. “Why are you asking me?”
Kimberly hated how quickly he slid from cheerful to pensive to cold. “I need your permission to leave the pack.”
He barked a laugh. “Permission? You don’t need that.”
“You’re my alpha, Gage. It’s protocol, right?”
He slammed some of the tools in the drawers, the metal clatter echoing off the walls, making Kimberly flinch. “Is it? Am I? Who knows anymore? Who fucking cares?”
She glared at him as she stood and approached. “Where is this coming from?”
Gage stopped, his back to her.
His shoulders sagged. “I’m just tired. It’s been a long day.
” He lazily turned to face her and slung his hands in his pockets, stance casual like this wasn’t an important conversation, though they both knew it meant a lot more.
“If you want my permission, you have it. But you don’t need it.
I don’t know what kind of alpha I’ll be, but I don’t want to be the kind that gatekeeps and has to grant permissions like the Pope or something.
You’re an adult and can make your own choices.
You love him and that’s what matters, I guess.
When the time comes, I’ll cut off the pack bond, and you can go on your merry way. ”
Kimberly hated it when he got in these moods, like being alpha was nothing, like the pack and the bonds they shared were nothing.
She knew better. He hid so much under that brooding bad-boy facade.
He didn’t need to hide from her. She knew how hard it was when their alpha died, how he didn’t feel worthy of the title, how the rest of their pack taking off after Michael’s death had wounded him so deeply.
So, she gave him a soft smile. “I can make my own choices, but you know the pack has always meant the world to me. You guys helped me through a rough period of adjustment in my life when I was just trying to figure stuff out and find a place. You and Declan are like the brothers I never had. That is so special for me. Leaving you guys behind is a hard choice to make, and I don’t want to mess up our friendship.
It’d be just you and Declan. I don’t want to be the reason the pack breaks up. ”
Gage softened and came to stand in front of her.
He lifted his hands like he was going to take her shoulders but remembered they were still dirty and refrained.
“If the pack ever breaks up, it will not be your fault. It’ll be mine.
And even if it does, I would rather all of us part ways because we found our true homes and true loves.
That seems like a pretty noble reason to leave a wolf pack, for love, I mean.
And if you’ve found that, then I’m happy for you.
” He held up a cautionary finger. “And I’ll kick your ass if you deny yourself the happiness for one more day of your life. ”
Kimberly broke off a laugh and took in his soiled mechanics shirt just once before diving in for a hug. He returned the embrace like the brother she claimed him to be.
“Thank you … and I’ll come back and kick your ass myself if you deny yourself your rightful place as alpha. You’d make a great one.”
Gage grumbled, “Yeah, yeah. Get in line.”
Kimberly held onto Gage’s warmth. It wouldn’t be the last time they hugged, but she made a point of memorizing the moment.
Sure, they would probably visit each other in the future, but it wouldn’t be the same without the pack bond there.
She’d trade one bond for another. It almost felt like leaving one family to join another. It felt like marriage.
Her mouth curved at the thought. Marriage and Shane.
Mating with Shane. That combo didn’t terrify her nearly as much as it did before.
Maybe because she finally allowed herself to see a future with him, regardless of who she was or what she could or couldn’t do.
Now equipped with her release from the pack, there was only one thing to hold her back, one big hurdle left to jump before she felt she could give herself fully and unconditionally to Shane. And her wolf felt more than ready.