Chapter 27 #2
I lean over and grab the makeshift foam tray and take a bite out of the cheese, instantly regretting it, shoving the remaining piece under my mattress.
I take a second to swallow what's in my mouth and try to wash it down with the water. If he sees that I won’t eat the cheese, he might not bring me anything else and I need all the energy I can get if we want to get out of here.
I’ll take soggy bread over this gross cheese.
“It’s like you liked being drowned. You should have confessed whatever bullshit sin and he would have stopped. Why must you taunt him like that?” Mother hen over here thinks she can speak logic to me, but she has no idea how a psycho mind works.
“Yeah, and then he would move onto you or Samantha next. She’s taken on enough and you wouldn’t last as you’ve never been through any sort of torture.
Your little academy trains you to chase after the bad guys, but doesn’t train you to withstand the worse-case scenario.
He got frustrated and he left without looking twice.
How long was I out for?” I ask as I look over to Samantha to make sure she’s doing okay.
She’s nibbling on her bread as she rocks back and forth.
It’s as if she’s trying to comfort herself but waiting for something to happen at any moment.
There’s still fear in her which tells me that I haven’t completely lost her.
I’ll take this over him touching her one more time.
I want to ask her what all he’s done to her to be more prepared, but I can’t bring myself to ask.
“I’m not 100 percent sure, but it had to be hours.
He came down and removed everything, did some sort of ritual before he left.
He came back a while later and brought the food.
The drowning and the hit against the wall seemed to drain you.
Your body seemed to know it was time to knock you out.
Please stop provoking him. If we want to get out of here, we need all the energy we can preserve.
” She gives me an update without a snide remark and puts on an act like she really cares if I live or die. I roll my eyes at that thought.
“Five hours,” Samantha whispers after she stops rocking back and forth. “The cuts will come next. You have about four to five hours before he comes back to begin the next form of repenting.”
Her soft, sudden voice causes me to freeze in place.
She’s been here long enough to time when he comes back, what the next torture or punishment will be, and each movement he makes.
She finally looks up and stares at me with her sad, tired eyes.
I get up to go to her and wrap my arms around her but I’m yanked back by the chain that I keep forgetting holds me in place.
We’re given little distance to move around and the sting from the metal cuff rubbing against my ankle reminds me that I’m a caged animal.
“Sam, he won’t harm you again, I promise. What else has he done to you?” I ask softly, hoping she’ll give me a little more to prepare for.
Monroe is quiet as she too is waiting to hear of his methods. Samantha takes a moment to think back to everything he’s done. I really don’t want to trigger her but right now, I need her to be brave and tell me.
“Depending on what ‘they’ tell him to do. Normally, tasing would come next, or locking you in a box with some sort of device that brings the temperature down and you almost freeze to death, but he stops it before it does. Death is too easy, it’ll be his last resort from my assumptions.
I thought my death was coming but when he heard about your party, he became obsessed over you and left me alone,” she confirms.
After her reveal, we all stay quiet for a while.
I take in all the new information she gives me and replay different tactics and scenarios in my head.
Mentally, I need to be prepared. My father always said that pain is in your head and if you set up your mind to block it out, you’ll last longer.
So, that’s what I do. I picture myself in each category and pull myself under where I feel nothing.
As if I have someone else in control of my body who can handle it far better than I can.
“Were you ever going to tell Alaric who you really are?” Monroe breaks my concentration and I turn my head to look at her.
She genuinely wants to know if I would have told him.
This time, her question is void of any venom but of sadness for her friend.
She doesn’t want to see him suffer from all the secrets I keep.
I wouldn’t blame him if he begins to hate me and turns on me.
The thought of him doing that hurts deeper than I want to admit.
“Do you really know who I am?” I tilt my head.
“It was never supposed to be this way. I wasn’t supposed to love him the way that I do.
I’m too selfish to let him go. Eventually, yes, I would have told him and I knew he would have to make a choice between me and his career.
I would never ask him to choose me no matter how bad it would hurt.
I tried to warn him before, but he didn’t give up on me. ”
She ponders on that for a moment. A rush of emotions flash her face, trying so hard to be civil. I can see her protectiveness coming forward and winning the fight between peace and starting an argument.
“He’s crazy about you. I don’t like you, nor do I think you’re good for him.
You have to let him go before it becomes too unbearable for him.
He’s worked so hard to get to the place he’s at now.
Not just work, but mentally. He was fucked up when he got out of the SEALs.
This is the one thing that keeps him level-headed.
Would you truly take that away from him?
” Her words dig deeper than I thought they would.
She’s right, but that doesn't mean I need to hear those words from her.
“Just when I thought I could tolerate you, within a minute you changed my mind. I know you’ve known him for years and think you can read him inside and out, but you want me out of the picture so he’ll lean into you for comfort.
Stop pretending you actually give a shit about him.
You’ve been adamant about your perception of me before you even met me.
Will you still be saying the same when I get free while you’re still chained?
” I turn away from her to face the wall.
If she said anything after that, I didn’t hear her.
My mind instantly goes back to what she said.
I’m not good for him. Our world clashes too much and will our love be strong enough or will it crumble to the ground?
The mere thought of letting him go makes my chest squeeze and I have to push it far down to avoid thinking about it right now.
My mind wanders to my cousin and best friends wondering if they figured out that my tracker is gone.
Who they called for help or what city they blew up to find me.
There’s no doubt Alaric has figured out that his partner is gone as well as me.
I wonder if he has the whole damn city looking for us, if he’s working with my cousin or burning down every damn building until he finds me.
I know for damn sure he’s in panic mode since The Jawbreaker has slipped through his grasp again.
My mind clicks over to imagining his warm body wrapped around me shielding me from everything in sight.
His breath against my neck and how safe I feel when I’m with him, his smoky amber scent filling my nose.
My eyes begin to shut heavily as I drift back to my safe place before hell freezes over.