Radioactive
The clouds roll through, black and ominous.
Thunder rumbles in the distance, and for a moment I consider abandoning my post to watch from the shelter of the barn.
But that wouldn’t be wise. I draw my strength from the energy produced by such storms. The closer I am, the more power I can harness, and I will need it.
Tonight, I hunt.
The thunder booms as the storm moves closer. The wind begins its shrill howl, slicing through the trees. Branches tremble at its force. The promise of destruction comes with every gust.
It won’t be long.
A twinge of excitement courses through me at the prospect.
I throw my head back, inhaling the fresh air as it caresses my skin.
It’s then that the sky opens up, bathing me with cool drops of heaven’s tears.
I cry out as the vortex of energy swirls around me.
The warming begins in my toes and I sigh as it crawls up my body, every hair electrified by the energy’s touch.
A human could not withstand such a process.
Their minds have been closed off from the day of their birth.
If they only knew the power they could wield, they’d be unstoppable.
The mind is an extraordinary tool capable of anything, but humans rarely tap into that power.
Instead, they live their lives defenseless and weak, unable to protect themselves from the evil that surrounds them.
Luckily for me, I am no human. Fallen from grace, I roam the earth determined to earn back my place in the heavens. Stripped of my standing and banished, I now walk amongst Heaven’s greatest enemies—demons.
Lightning flashes overhead, pinning me to this spot.
Sparks erupt from my hands and I cry out at the exquisite pain.
As quickly as the storm began, it’s over.
The energy recedes, leaving me powerful yet hollow.
As a virtue angel, I controlled the elements, and I’ve somehow carried that gift here to Earth.
During storms is the only time I can come close to feeling like I did in Heaven, and it’s an effective slap in the face.
I fall to my knees, allowing the residual energy to create spasms throughout my body. Soon all of it will be soaked into my skin and stored for use. I begin to pray—a force of habit I’ve yet to break. My words are useless. God is undoubtedly not listening.
“Victoria?” I raise my head to a fellow fallen, Ezekiel. “Are you ready?” he asks, voice quiet as he realizes what I’m doing.
I stand to my feet, brushing off the dirt that coats my knees. “I told you, I work alone now.”
Two years ago, it was always him by my side. We’d fight together every night and wake up next to each other every morning. Those days ended the moment I realized Zeke was my Band-Aid.
He saved me from crippling despair and helped mold me into what I am today. For that, I owe him my life. But it’s not my life he wants. No, that would be my heart, and that was stolen from me.
“It’s dangerous, Tori. Why must you be so stubborn?” he practically growls, bringing me back to the present. It’s nothing new. We’ve had this same argument no less than twice per week for the past two years. Since the day I gave him my virginity. Yet he still persists.
“It’s not stubbornness; I just don’t need you slowing me down,” I say, turning my back to one of God’s finest creations. He’s a work of art, there’s no doubt, and that is exactly why I don’t need to be anywhere near Ezekiel Kincaid.
I don’t trust myself around him. I’ve already been weak in his presence, and I don’t intend to be that person again. He helped me through a trying time, but now I need to help myself.
Then there’s the fact that he’s teamed up with a few mortals who also hunt demons.
Early on, they almost got us killed, because Zeke isn’t honest with them.
They don’t know who or what he really is.
He hides his true power. A power he too brought from Heaven.
That’s a gift that shouldn’t be hidden, so I refuse to hunt with them.
Why delay the monsters’ deaths just to deceive humans?
He barks a laugh. “I’m the best hunter on Earth. It’s you who can’t keep up with me.” My eyes meet his, and the sexy grin he has plastered all over his face makes my insides lava. I push down the lustful feelings, determined to resist.
He’s a test and I will not fail. Not this time.
“I’ll let you believe what you want to, but as for me, I go alone.” As I walk past him, his hand shoots out, grabbing me by the elbow.
“The easiest way to get yourself killed, Tori. I’m just trying to help. Why won’t you let anyone help?”
Tearing my arm free, I spin to look right into his cobalt blue eyes. “Because I have a job to do, and your help comes with ulterior motives. You want something we once had, and that’s no longer on the table.”
“Such as?” he drawls.
“Such as,” I repeat snippily, “sex.”
His brows rise and his lip quirks in a sexy-as-sin smirk. “Sex?”
“That’s what I said.”
“You know cuddling is just as good. Maybe a little makeout session.” He shrugs. “It doesn’t have to necessarily be sex, Tori. I’m open to all forms of foreplay.”
“Ugh. See?” I groan. “That’s exactly what I’m talking about, Zeke. Unlike you, I don’t want to be here,” I nearly spit. “I want to go home, and in order to do that, I need to prove my loyalty and allegiance. Falling back into old habits won’t get me there.”
“I remember a time when you enjoyed those habits.”
I did. Zeke was passionate. He took his time and always made sure I was content. He provided comfort in a world that was foreign. I was lonely and he was good company. More importantly, he mended my shattered heart and battered ego. For a short time, at least.
“Yes. I did. Until I finally got my head on straight and my priorities in line.”
He scoffs. “You strive for the impossible. No one has ever been allowed back through the gates, and you know that. Once you’re forsaken, it’s done.” His eyes nearly beg me to heed his words.
I continue walking toward the barn, trying to put some distance between us.
I’ve closed the door for us to be more because we have two entirely different paths.
I want back in, and he’s determined to stay on Earth.
He’d be my temptation and the very reason I’d never get home.
I’ve tried to convince him, but he’s unmovable in his resolve.
Which begs the question … why? What is he running from?
I don’t ask, because that would mean I’d have to share my own past. For two years that’s been the one topic of conversation off limits.
I don’t ask him why he fell, and he doesn’t ask me.
“One of these days you’re going to admit I’m right,” he shouts, but I pay him no mind. “You’ll spend a lonely existence until then.”
“Good,” I call over my shoulder. “Alone is what I need. Alone is what’s best. Maybe you should ditch your human shields and use your power to its fullest.”
“I’m no fool, Tori. I take help where I can get it. They’re safer with me on their team.”
“You’ll get them killed,” I shoot back in frustration. “What will God think then?”
“Nobody is watching, Tori. We’re on our own where He’s concerned.” He doesn’t need to clarify who He is. “Move on with your life. Embrace Earth. It holds plenty of its own perks.”
I whip around, stalking back toward Zeke. “If that’s true, then why do you insist on hunting?” I ask, folding my arms over my chest when I’m mere inches from him. “Why not go about your life?” I raise a brow, waiting for his answer.
I’m tired of him constantly questioning me. His actions make less sense. He doesn’t want back in Heaven, but he can’t help but continue God’s work here. It doesn’t add up. It never has. Yet another reason to add to my growing list of why I need to stay far away from Zeke. If he’d allow it.
“I’m a hunter, Tori. A power angel. When evil presents itself, I’m called.”
“Tsk tsk,” I say, waving my fingers in front of his face. “You’re a forsaken power angel. According to your own words, you’re no longer needed. Nobody’s watching, so who are you trying to impress, Zeke?”
His hands are at either side of his temples, massaging out the headache I’ve certainly given him.
This is our thing. Fight in circles, getting nowhere.
“Maybe I don’t like to see God’s creation destroyed by those beasts,” he shrugs.
“All of the perks of Earth depend on Earth’s existence.
Someone has to save the humans from vampires. ”
I sigh. “If it’s not the vampires, it’ll be another form of demon, Zeke. You can’t stop them from coming. Lucifer will send legion after legion until this world is destroyed.”
But not until he’s done toying with humanity—and other beings.
“If you truly have no intention of trying to get back to Heaven, then why not just throw in the towel and enjoy what time is left?” I ask, not understanding why he’s committed so much time fighting for a god he chose not to serve.
I know little about why he fell, but he has admitted it was his choice. God did not cast him out.
“I’ve made it my mission to slow down his progress. Like I said, I kinda like Earth, and since I’m immortal and all, I might as well do something of significance.”
“You’re only immortal until Lucifer finds your weakness. None of us are truly immortal, Zeke. All of our existences can be ended.”
“If we work together, we’ll have a better chance of survival,” he says, leaning forward and taking a piece of my errant hair between his fingers. “We could both enjoy those perks.”
I inhale, breathing in the smell of sandalwood and wet earth, my eyes closing to hide the fact that it affects me. He affects me.
“Tori, look at me,” he commands, voice husky with want.
I do as he instructs, eyes roaming the six-foot-three warrior. He’s tanned and toned everywhere. The muscles in his arms bulge under his white Henley shirt. In the years I’ve been in this area, I’ve never seen him do a single thing aside from hunt, and it shows.
“Why did you fall, Zeke?” I whisper.
My hair falls from his grasp as he steps back, running his hands through his raven hair.
“You and I both know that’s not a conversation we want to have. When you’re ready to share, then I’ll consider doing the same.”
I sigh, knowing he’s right. I haven’t uttered a word of why I fell since the day it happened, and I have no intention to. Ever. The shame plagues me daily, and the nightmare of it all haunts my dreams.
“You have to open up to someone, Tori, and I’m all you’ve got. For reasons I don’t understand, we were brought together, and you can’t deny it.”
“It was a chance encounter,” I say, averting my eyes. “And I’ve been trying to escape you ever since.”
“I found you at your lowest point. It was fate.”
“You don’t believe in fate. It was a simple right place, right time scenario, Zeke.”
Completely ignoring my words, he goes on. “Once, I thought you’d share everything with me. You freaked out and I don’t understand why.”
He knows. I’ve told him several times a day. Because I want back into Heaven. God is love personified. In his presence, you don’t feel things like hate and anger. Here, you feel everything, and it can be painful. Why would anyone choose that? For something like human love? No, thank you.
“You know there are more fallen here on Earth,” I say, pumping as much exasperation as possible into my voice. “There have to be. Go find them.”
“There aren’t,” he says, sounding annoyed.
“Perhaps the other fallen are doing exactly what you suggested and enjoying all of Earth’s pleasures,” I mock, rolling my eyes as I say it.
He grins, moving forward and invading my personal space. I back up, caught off guard by his sudden movement. “There are a lot of pleasures, Tori. Let me remind you. Like old times,” he says seductively, leaning into me, inches from my mouth.
I trip backward slightly. “Knock it off, Zeke.”
He shoves his hands into his jean pockets and rocks back and forth on his feet. “Ah, come on, Tori, lighten up. It’s going to be a long life if you can’t have a little fun.”
“The only fun I need is slicing my sword into the heart of a vampire,” I growl.
I’m frustrated by how much power he has over me.
I hate what he makes me want. Makes me crave.
He doesn’t need to remind me of anything.
I remember it all in great detail. The way his hands roamed over my body.
His demanding tongue dancing with my own.
The way he felt inside of me. I shiver at the thought.
Zeke’s phone rings, and he pulls it out from his back pocket. “What?” he barks. His eyes narrow. “Where? … I’ll be there,” he says, before disconnecting the call and placing his phone back into his jeans. “Vamps just outside of Jackson Square.”
They’re getting braver, coming out earlier and practically in the heart of New Orleans. Rage sweeps through me, the need to unleash the energy trapped inside coursing its way up my spine. It needs to be released.
“Are you coming?” Zeke asks, sounding far too hopeful.
I want to. I miss the days when we fought together, but falling back into our old routines is a recipe for disaster. Zeke doesn’t deserve to be my crutch. That’s what he was in the beginning, and that’s what he’d be now. There’s no sense in trying to deny it.
“No. Like I said, I don’t fight alongside humans.”
His eyes narrow. “If I ditch the humans, will you fight beside me?”
“Get rid of them first, and then we’ll talk.”
He grins, nodding in satisfaction. “I’ll be back,” he promises, before turning and jogging off to join the fight.
I have no intention of fighting with him.
With or without the humans, my words still stand.
I need to do this alone, and Zeke would only complicate things.
Getting back to Heaven is my greatest goal, and staying the course is imperative.
Angels aren’t supposed to enjoy the perks of Earth.
They’re not meant to dabble in human emotions and pleasure.
Zeke surely does, and that can’t have him in God’s good graces.
Battling demons or not, you don’t turn your back on God and get a pass.
I’m hoping that atoning in more ways than one will convince Him to give me a second chance.
The truth that nobody knows is that I fell to Earth for an angel—one who deceived me.