Chapter 29
“I was their client,” Alex says. “I’d hired Ledge to kill my uncle.”
My eyes widen. “I’m sorry, what?”
Varsha chuckles. “It’s true; he was.”
“I’m going to need more than just that, guys,” I say.
We’re sitting on the hallway floor, waiting for Jayce and Dorran to return. And so, to spend the time I have on my hands, I decided to ask Alex and Varsha if they’d be comfortable in telling me how they met Dorran, and how they came to be a part of his crew.
“My parents separated when I was six,” Alex starts.
“My dad changed states, remarried, and didn’t want anything to do with Mom and I.
Soon after, the two of us started living with her elder brother, Declan, and things were back to normal.
I mean, as normal as can be for a middleclass bunch like us.
” He lets go of a breath and picks at a lint on his pant.
“Declan owned a diner, and Mom and I helped him with it as much as we could. I had to drop out of school because we were always low on cash, so most of my time was spent in the diner’s kitchen – cooking.
When I turned 17, Mom was diagnosed with AML – acute myelogenous leukemia.
Doctors said it’s treatable, but again, we didn’t have the money for it.
I…” He swallows, and his eyes glaze over a little.
“I had to watch her die,” he whispers. “She wasn’t the strongest person I’ve known, but she still stood strong against everything that came her way.
Until she couldn’t.” He laughs and shakes his head.
“But life isn’t fair, especially to people like her.
” He sniffs a little. “So anyway.” He waves a hand in front of his face.
“A couple of years after Mom passed, I came out to my uncle; told him I’m gay.
And, well, let’s just say he didn’t take it well.
He beat me up so bad, I could barely see straight for days.
He took me to church, tried to “change” me by showing me “the Lord’s way”, but I kept telling him that who I was, was never going to change.
” He’s staring straight ahead – at nothing – as if he’s lost in a memory from his past.
I place a hand over his and give it a squeeze. “That’s awful, Alex. I’m so sorry you went through that.”
“Thanks, Cigs. I appreciate it.”
A person’s sexuality – whatever it may be – is their identity, sure, but it’s also their own damn preference and business. No
one is allowed to judge another for who they love or feel attracted to. Having a sense of independence in one’s desires is so important, and so fucking beautiful. It shouldn’t be taken away from anyone.
I rub the pad of my thumb over Alex’s palm. “Is that why you had him killed?” I ask him.
He clicks his tongue. “No. It was because he tried to lock me inside his diner’s walk-in freezer,” he says.
“What?”
He gives me a rueful smile. “Yeah. I’m pretty sure he thought he could get away with it – call it an accident, maybe – and wash his hands of a sinner like me.
But unfortunately for him, I managed to escape.
” He turns his hand and twines his fingers with mine.
“I ran to the sheriff’s office, told Solo everything, and he offered to assign Jay, Varsha, and Ledge to kill Declan.
I immediately said yes, but I also had to keep my mouth shut about everything if I didn’t wanna end up underground.
” He chuckles. “The four of them came over to my house a few days later like they were there to have a fucking friendly dinner or something – all casual and shit – and when Jay saw me, I think it triggered something in him, because he was on Declan in seconds. He finished him off before the rest of us could say anything, and Declan was a skinny motherfucker, so he didn’t stand a chance against my guy.
” He laughs again. “Ledge asked if I wanted to get a farewell retribution, to which I said hell
yeah, and put all my strength in smashing Declan’s head in with the first thing I could find: a metal vase.” He grins. “That feeling of his skull cracking open for me was just…” He shudders a little. “So
hot. I still remember how Jay had looked at me in that moment – like he was transfixed by me. It’s something I’ll never forget, and it’s also one of the reasons I asked Solo if I could join the crew.”
I chuckle. “You and Jayce are adorable together.”
Alex gags, and Varsha makes a sound between a cough and a snort.
“What?” I ask, glancing between them.
“If you call us adorable in front of Jayce, he’ll probably choke you for it,” Alex tells me.
“And then have the street dogs feast on your bones,” adds Varsha.
I raise a brow. “Seriously?”
“Yup,” Alex says. “My husband doesn’t do adorable.”
I shake my head. “When did you two get married anyway?”
“Last year,” Alex provides, then grins again. “And in the same church Declan used to take me to, to cleanse me of the evil inside me.”
I laugh. “Savage.”
He joins me. “I know; I had so much fun. And then Ledge killed the pastor because he kept telling Jay and I how we’d sinned in the eyes of God, and my wedding day got so much better.”
I don’t know why, but I can’t help but laugh at that. He’s so fucking ecstatic as he says all that, that I can’t control myself.
Varsha laughs along with me, making me feel validated.
“I’m serious!” he says. “I mean, have you seen the guy ending a life? He’s magnificent while he works.” He fans himself.
I swat him on the arm. “If you got married to Jayce last year, when did you join the crew?” I ask.
“Three years ago – right before Solo retired.”
I turn to Varsha. “And you?”
“Five years ago,” she tells me. “Dorran and Jayce found me naked and starving in an alley after my parents threw me out of the house upon having found me fucking a guy in my bedroom.”
I open my mouth, but nothing comes out, because what the fuck?
Varsha chuckles. “Confusing, I know. The thing is: I’m an Indian, so my family was very conservative when it came to a lot of things.
No smoking or drinking, no sex before marriage, etcetera.
My dad, especially, was too overbearing.
When they found a guy balls-deep inside me, they lost their shit.
They tied me up, hit me, and shaved my head, then kicked me out of the house.
For days, I lived off of scrapes I found in dumpsters, and I had to stay in the shadows as I had no clothes on me.
I think it was a week after living hidden in the alley that Jayce and Dorran found me.
They took me in and treated me like family, and if it wasn’t for them and Solo, I’d have rotted in a darkened corner, and no one would have even cared. ”
My chest tightens at her words; at the haunting expression on her face.
I make my way over to her, and Alex does the same.
“I don’t think saying I’m sorry is enough for what you’ve faced,” I tell her. “But still, I’m so very sorry, Varsha.”
Her expression clears as she smiles at me, then nudges my shoulder with hers. “Thanks. You’ve been through a lot of shit yourself, so I’m sorry, too, Cignette.”
“Me too,” Alex adds. “I apologize for not having said it sooner, but I mean it.”
A lump forms in my throat, but I swallow it down and give them a grateful nod. “Thanks, guys.”
“V, you have to tell Cigs how Ledge killed your parents,” Alex urges, then sighs. “I wish I’d known you guys then. It would have been so cool to watch their demise.”
Again, the three of us laugh at Alex’s eccentricity.
“Well, Dorran cut my parents into pieces – while they were alive,” Varsha provides. “He asked me to watch as he took turns dismembering them, and even though it was a lot for me to witness, I enjoyed every single one of their screams.”
“You had every right to,” Alex tells her. “It’s a good thing we’ve got Cignette’s uncle at our backs, or else we wouldn’t have the kind of liberty we do right now.”
My breath catches in my lungs as I stare at Alex, and a chill runs through my entire body as I’m completely taken over by shock.
“What did you just say?” I all but whisper the question.
Alex blinks at me. “Huh?”
I’m breathing a little heavily now as the impact of his words finally takes over.
“Cignette?” Varsha looks at me in concern, then places a hand on my shoulder. “Didn’t Dorran tell you that Chase and Miranda are our top-tier clients?”
I thought I’d heard it all, but I apparently haven’t.
“My mom’s involved too?” I sound and feel so dumb right now.
“I wouldn’t say they’re involved,” Alex says. “We kill whoever they want us to kill, and in turn, Chase keeps our information out of the law’s hands. And, if there’s any evidence against us, he extracts and destroys it. It’s sort of a barter system, nothing more.”
My head feels heavy; my body feels hot. There’s a pressure on my chest that makes me wanna heave, but I need to know more, so I press on.
“Did Dorran know about me before last week?” I question.
“The whole of Riverside knows you, Cignette,” Varsha states. “But if you’re asking for specifics, then no, none of us knew anything about you but your name and relationship to the Adler siblings.”
“Is that what you call Uncle Chase and Mom, then?”
“Among other things,” Alex chimes, and I can’t help but smile a little.
“So, my uncle has contracted kills to you?”
“Your mother as well, yes,” he says.
“She’s basically a demon, so I’m not surprised, but my uncle…”
“He’s just as ruthless towards his rivals,” Varsha provides. “We’ve ended quite a few lives for him.”
I shake my head in disbelief.
I know Uncle Chase is driven – towards his job, his responsibilities to the county, and towards Mom and I – but I’ve just now grasped the full extent of his power, and how it works in his advantage when he needs it.
“When did this start?” I ask. “I mean, when did my uncle and mom get involved with you guys?”
Alex huffs a little. “Again: I wouldn’t use the word involved to–”
“You know what I mean,” I say, cutting him off.