25. Margeaux
25
MARGEAUX
The teacher in the Charlie Brown cartoon specials makes more sense than my bosses do right now.
I understand all of the words they’re using—I’m no dummy after all—yet somehow, they are failing to compute.
Complaint. Favoritism. Violation of company policy.
Sucking in a breath, I force myself to focus. Percy, Auggie, and Carl from HR are sitting across the large wooden table from me, their expressions knitted into something I can’t name. Something that tells me they are just as uncomfortable as I am.
Yet, they aren’t the ones who got caught with their hands in the cookie jar. The one who has spent the last couple of months sneaking around, risking her job and professional reputation. Something I always said I’d never do.
Nope, that was me.
“I’m sure you can understand and respect that it’s a complicated situation,” Auggie says, trying to be delicate.
“That’s one word for it,” I comment, numbness taking over as I try to wrap my brain around the bomb they just dropped .
Because this is real. This isn’t simply a nightmare that I’m going to wake up from to roll over and snuggle into Gus for comfort. Nope. This is my life. My actual Friday afternoon. The future of my career.
An HR complaint.
Someone ratted us out.
The walls of the large conference room close in on me, a space that seemed so massive when filled with an entire department the other day now feeling claustrophobic. Then again, that moment was one of happiness and celebration, rather than admonishment and censure.
“We want to do what’s right for everyone involved,” Percy adds. “And in order to do that, we need to properly investigate these allegations.”
“And what exactly are the allegations?” I press, letting some indignation slip into the pins and needles prickling my skin. I look my boss straight in the eye, lawyer to lawyer, wanting an answer. A real answer. “You said there has been a complaint regarding a personal relationship between Gus and me, and therefore a potential conflict of interest. What conflict of interest? What examples of favoritism were provided?”
The corner of Percy’s mouth twitches and I can tell he’s fighting back a smile. That the lawyer in him is proud of me for demanding such proof. However, the manager in him wins out, and he remains straight-faced.
Carl clears his throat, leaning forward, preparing himself to tackle this one. “For the last two months, Gus has been the interim head of the legal department, to which you are assigned. Per Hayes policy, personal relationships between direct reports is not allowed. If we can confirm that there was indeed a relationship of this nature, that then substantiates the belief that this may have led to a conflict of interest during this time. ”
The well-practiced, jargon-filled statement does nothing to ease the fury building in me. If anything it stokes the fire—fans the flames of outrage at the situation. I have so many questions, my head and my heart competing for the chance to lead this fight.
“What proof is there of a relationship?”
“Are you denying the relationship, Miss Finnegan?” Carl asks.
“I’m asking what proof you and the accuser have,” I retort.
All three men reel back, Carl the most, my question catching them off guard. The air shifts, unease sinking in further, as they look at each other. They were not expecting me to fight back. Well, too bad. That’s who I am.
Shows how well they know me.
I didn’t get to this point in my career by backing down from a fight. I won’t go down without one either.
Percy clears his throat, shifting in his seat, indecision written all over his face. I know they know. Or, I assume they know . Gus told me that he confided in Percy on Monday that he has a “personal interest” in me, but from the way it sounded it was more that he would be acting on it rather than he has acted on it.
As for Auggie, well, he is Gus’s father. The Hayes family is close. Really close. There is no way that I’ve spent as much time as I have with them—all of them—and their parents weren’t aware. Not to mention, I am—was?—expected at Sunday dinner this weekend. As his girlfriend. Can’t imagine Auggie is in the dark on that one.
Question is, do they know that I know that they know?
As for Carl, well, he’s the wild card here. He could go either way. I think back, trying to remember if Gus said anything over these last few weeks about whether or not he’d talked with HR when I first arrived, but there’s too much noise from this mess to think clearly. And I don’t think he did anything this week. Because I said we should wait until Monday.
Good going, Margeaux…
Auggie nods to Carl, a silent signal that makes my heart plummet. Internally, I scramble, my defense crumbling before me by the second. Reaching into his pocket, Carl pulls out his tablet, tapping it to life, then turning it to face me. Filling the screen is a photo. One that takes my already plummeting heart and sends it straight through the floorboards.
In the dim glow of the church parking lot lights is Gus, his arms wrapped around me, my hands resting on the lapels of his coat. The angle of the photo shows our profiles perfectly, leaving no question that it’s us. My insides squeeze, remembering the moment. That kiss. The one that was over too quickly, but also completely told me that he was mine, and I was his. Right after he’d told me we were about to be able to stop sneaking around.
So much for that.
“We probably shouldn’t be showing you this,” Auggie says. “But, we know, and moreover, we know that you know that we know. Or something like that.”
That answers that question…
His voice is easy, even through the heaviness that I can see weighing on him. His thick Georgia accent is comforting though, something about the timbre of his voice putting me a little more at ease.
“I like you, Margeaux, a lot,” Percy adds. “I feel that you add a great deal of value to our department. However, we’ve been put in a tough spot. Trust me, this was not how I saw this meeting going this morning.”
“Meeting?” The question squeaks out of me unintentionally. An internal thought that was meant to stay that way, that somehow made its way outside .
Percy’s slow nod says it all.
“The allegation was made this morning, to me, by one of your colleagues.”
“Teresa…”
I have got to stop saying the inside thoughts out loud…
Percy nods again, this time Auggie joining in. I look to Carl, who quickly looks away, a guilty expression painted across his face. They all know. And they know that I know that they know. And they hate that we’re all here. Just like I do. At least we’re all in that boat together.
“So you don’t deny the relationship?” Carl asks carefully.
Sucking in a breath, I stretch my diaphragm, letting my lungs burn, just so that my heart won’t be the only part of me that hurts. I shake my head—there’s no use in denying it now. Even if I wanted to. Even if we were all willing to play dumb and look the other way. They have the fucking photo.
“Forgive me, I do have to ask,” he continues. “This has been an entirely consensual relationship, correct?”
I bark out a laugh, unsure on whose behalf I’m more insulted—mine or Gus’s. “Thank you for your concern, as artificial as it may be. Yes, everything about our relationship has been consensual. Do you know the man you work for? I’m pretty sure this is the first rule Gus has ever broken.”
“Second,” Carl mutters. “He got a speeding ticket in high school.”
“Third,” Percy counters. “He had Carly home after curfew once. But only once.”
Auggie fights a smile, shrugging slightly, as if he has nothing more to contribute to the list. I shake my head, my ire releasing slightly—but only slightly—not sure how I feel that the three men sent to reprimand me are clearly going through the motions because they have to. They certainly don’t seem to think this whole thing is a very big deal.
“All kidding aside,”—Percy clears his throat—“we are in a tough spot. In a normal circumstance I’m not sure that we could share this, but given your background, I know that you will understand. There’s been the threat of legal action.”
There’s been the threat of legal action…
He cannot be fucking serious.
That little…no, I’m not sinking to her level. I will save my choice words for a later date. Preferably one when I’m back in New Orleans and have found the highest Voodoo Priestess I can find to do her thing.
“Made that much more complicated by the fact that Gus is a Hayes,” Auggie continues. “The temporary nature of his overseeing the department adds to it as well, but what it all comes down to?—”
“We knowingly violated company policy,” I cut him off.
They nod.
I inhale deeply, holding my breath until my lungs burn some more. Suddenly, every inch of me wants to break down. To let loose. Rage. Cry. Break things. Put on a display that rivals the She-Hulk. But I know I can’t.
“What now?”
It’s the only logical question. Even though being logical is the last thing I want to be right now. Nope. I’m holding myself together with dental floss internally, my heart’s desire to take over gaining ground with each passing second.
“We’ll conduct our review. Figure out if there was any kind of wrongdoing, conflict of interests, favoritism, etc., and if discovered, take the necessary action,” Percy says.
Take the necessary action…
My stomach flips, pulse kicking into high gear. How I’ve kept my heart rate under control until now I have no idea, but those four words set it loose like the starting gun at the Olympics. Because they can only mean one thing.
Termination.
Conflict of interest is hard to prove in situations like this. Especially on the receiving end. What isn’t going to take much is the violation of the fraternization policy. Even if we try to claim that it started prior to his overseeing the legal department, we weren’t official or public, nor had it been declared—three conditions that I’m sure are required. Conditions I’d require if I were the one drawing up the contract. And Hayes has much better lawyers than me.
“Understood.” I bite out the answer, the single word leaving a sour taste in my mouth.
Still, there’s a chance this could all blow over. That they decide there was no wrongdoing. A decision they would be well within their right to come to. We went to great lengths to keep our relationship out of the office.
Other than that one night on my desk.
I suppose the trip to Savannah was technically a Hayes-sponsored trip. But neither of those events affected the others in the department. And when it came to the others, everyone was treated fairly. Mabel even said so the other day.
“Until then, we’re placing you on administrative leave.”
Or not.
“You’re suspending me?”
I lurch forward so fast my chair almost rolls out from under me. Steadying myself, I try to regain control, over my emotions and my body, but it’s hard. The underlying numbness still thrums through me, and paired with the Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride of emotions and the fire crackling through my veins, each new hit has me reeling.
“Administrative leave,” Percy repeats. As if somehow calling it that makes it better. Softens the blow. Three days ago he was putting me in charge of a new project, and today he’s removing me from the building. “Paid, of course. It’s standard practice. Just until we can figure this out.”
A soft ping resounds in the back of mind, my whole world shattering around me. Everything I’ve worked for, my entire career crumbling underneath me.
I’m going to lose everything.
“We know this isn’t ideal,” Carl states. “But we want you to know that?—”
“Thank you for your time,” I cut him off, each word more terse and clipped than the one before.
Pushing to my feet, I tighten the knot around the string that is precariously keeping me stitched together. My temper flares under my skin, but I don’t let it show. Instead, I force it down deep, letting it turn into lava that can boil and bubble, spreading through me. Seep into every crack and space there is. That’s the only way I’m going to get through the rest of this.
I can fall apart later. Once I’m behind closed doors and I can fully be alone with myself and the consequences of my actions. Of the risk I took.
I nod, silently thanking my bosses for their time, unable to say anything else. What else is there to say?
Plenty actually, but none of it is going to solve anything.
None of the counterarguments I could present about Teresa and her actions or attitude toward me since I arrived matter. I’ve kept them to myself, trying not to cause drama, so there isn’t documentation backing them up. All they would be now is she said-she said. A thin grasping at straws as a last-ditch effort.
No, I took a risk and it came back to bite me in the ass. Time to woman up and own it.
“I promise that we’ll make this as swift as we can,” Percy says as I reach for the door handle.
“I trust that you will,” I reply, my voice warbling. And I mean it. If there is anything that I know in my gut, it’s that they won’t try and drag this out.
Making my way to my desk, I keep my head down, gathering the personal effects that I can fit in my purse. Thankfully, no one seems to be around this afternoon, so I can do this without an audience. I have no idea if this is by design, but I’m grateful either way.
“Margeaux.”
I look up, Auggie’s deep voice catching me off guard. His face is somber, his brown eyes as soulful as each one of his sons’. Must be where they all get it from.
He looks around, checking there is no one around us. “This is not how I wanted our first meeting to go.”
I force a small smile, appreciating his sentiment. Slinging my purse over my shoulder, I turn to go, but then stop, looking back at him. “That makes two of us.”
I don’t wait for a response, heading straight for the door. I need time and space to think. To figure out what comes next. How I could have been so stupid.
My career has always been the most important thing. My number one focus. I let that slip—for a relationship.
The buzz in my purse stops me, my already on-edge self wondering what now. What else could happen. After that meeting, there doesn’t really seem like there’s another shoe to drop. Then again, I thought we were in the clear in the first place, so maybe I need to not get ahead of myself in thinking that nothing worse can happen.
I do a double take at the name on my screen, having to read the message a couple of times before it sinks in. Maybe the universe is trying to tell me something.
Dexter Wynn
M, heard things at Hayes are getting a shake-up. We should talk…