Chapter Ten
Aster
I slept so soundly it was like I switched off the same time the bedroom light did. Mickey’s arms were the safest place in the world.
When I woke up it was mid-morning and Mickey was long gone.
I stretched, showered and fixed myself an extra large bowl of Mickey’s granola, and sat at my laptop, ready to send another round of emails to the town council.
To my surprise I had some replies.
Out of seven council members, four had replied. None of them had any idea what I was talking about, but one by the name of Barbara Traylor had a distinct note of concern to her email. She promised to look into it further from her end. I sent follow ups to the others.
I posted the article I’d written on all my socials, making the settings public so anyone could see and share it. I sent a link to Tane, knowing he’d boost the post when he had time.
Then I did some noodling around online, looking for companies who wanted to expand into our area of Southern California. It didn’t turn up much.
My phone buzzed, I opened it to see a message from Joel, my drag queen bestie.
Joel: Hey babe, haven’t heard from you in a hot minute. Still alive down there?
I smiled as I tapped out a reply.
Aster: yeah, I’m alive. Staying at Harlow’s family farm with her older brother, trying to dig up some shady government conspiracy.
Joel: how very Agent Mulder of you
Joel: omg we should do an X-Files drag duet
Joel: I’d be hot as hell in those shoulder pads and almond shaped pumps with pale pantyhose
I burst out laughing.
Aster: I don’t think I’ve ever seen an episode, just bits on Reels and stuff.
Joel: gay sacrilege! Watch it immediately.
Joel: Now, is this the older brother that brought you lunch and cheered from the front row of the show?
Aster: yeah same guy, Mickey
Joel: dude is so hot, and so into you. Have you done it yet?
I felt my cheeks warm up. Joel cut right through the BS and got straight to the point and I loved him for that, but also I wasn’t so sure I wanted to gush about everything to him.
Aster: there may have been a moment. But he was pretty worried about me being younger and stuff so idk. I don’t know it’s going anywhere
My phone rang two seconds after I pressed ‘send’.
“What does a moment mean?” Joel demanded.
“Hi Joel, nice to hear from you. I’m fine thanks,” I teased.
“Yeah yeah, tell me more. You kissed hotty mcbeardface. I want the details.”
“You are getting absolutely no details.” I looked up at the door, convinced Mickey was about to walk in. “I’m staying with him so I don’t get buried in wedding planning by proxy, and he’s sweet and we’re cooking for each other, and I’m sometimes helping with the alpacas.”
Joel squealed into the phone and I had to hold it away from my ear until he was done. “You’re basically married! Get a ring and put it on him before he beats you to it.”
“Joel...” I got up and looked out the window.
I could see Mickey wearing a wide brimmed hat in the distance.
Pitching hay. Safe. No chance of him walking in.
“I’ve had a crush on him since forever. FOREVER.
He’s my best friend’s big brother, you know?
He’s hot and sweet and kind and capable and we played fucking board games last night.
But he’s... he’s not sure, and I don’t think I should do anything more or my heart will wilt and never revive. You know?” I took a breath.
To his credit, Joel was patient and listened through my whole rant without interrupting.
“I know what you’re saying, but if he’s cooking for you and playing board games and he kissed you, that means he thinks of you as more than his kid sister’s friend. Nobody goes around cooking for people they don’t care about.”
“Well, maybe not in Sacramento,” I said. “Here it’s kind of a hospitality thing.”
“You’re making excuses and I don’t want to hear it.”
“I don’t know. Maybe I should just move back out again, stop freaking him out. I don’t want to make him uncomfortable. Something about me clearly does.”
Joel was silent for a moment and then hummed. “Well, I know you, and you’ll make the right decision, but for god’s sake talk to the guy before you pack up and leave. It might not be the issue that you’re assuming it is.”
We both left unsaid the issue could be me being trans.
“Thanks Joel. And thanks for checking in. How are things with you?”
Joel launched into a diatribe about some bitchy co-worker, and I smiled and listened, comforted by his familiar patter.
I let my mind wander, my mouth providing the required ‘mmhm’s and ‘yeah’s as required.
Mickey was sweet and he’d handled last night very well, but I knew it was complicated. People had preconceptions and weird notions, and it was hard to shake those off in one night.
Look how things had gone with Harlow! She’d initially taken my transition as a weird slight against her personally.
Thinking back to nights at clubs and bars in Sacramento, I shuddered to think of some of the weird stuff people had suggested to me. There was no shortage of creeps who wanted me just because I was trans, seeing me as ‘woman-lite’ or ‘not really gay if I sleep with you’ or shit like that.
Whatever Mickey was dealing with, I knew he wasn’t a creepo like those people, but I also knew being with me, wasn’t cut and dry, Especially since I hadn’t had top surgery yet.
But there was something going on, some reason Mickey didn’t want to go there with me, and I had to respect that.
I couldn’t pressure him in any way. I’d have to go back to sleeping in my own bed and treat him as a friend. It was best for both of us.
Mickey
I was chatting with the alpacas, reassuring them everything was okay when a truck came up the road from Lakeside Drive, parked up and offloaded a crew of people in high-vis. There wasn't even a lane there, they'd just driven over the wild grass. Bold, given there were bound to be potholes aplenty.
They called out to each other, holding wooden stakes and tape measures and walking around the stretch of land the suits had investigated. Obviously on the same project, the data center…
The herd didn’t like this one bit. They all moved, rather hurriedly towards me gathering behind me, keeping watchful eyes on the strangers.
The workers weren’t technically on my land. They were staying a good few yards from my fence, but as I approached I realized they were demarcating something.
I didn’t like that one bit.
I couldn’t yell at them to leave, or they’d be back in the dead of night, or something.
Was it them that had been around in the night? That was a creepy thought. Had they been working on this undercover?
I went to the herd, walking amongst them and soothing them.
“It’s all right, babies. You’re safe, you’re safe with me.”
Aladdin blinked up at me, his eyelashes so long it reminded me of the drag kings and queens at Aster’s show.
God, Aster was so hot. Just thinking of his face as we touched each other the night before threatened to give me a boner.
But I had to focus.
First, I had to soothe my charges, then I had to interfere with these workers in some way. I didn’t like what they were doing. I didn’t like that the suits were being secretive about it, and I didn’t like that they seemed to be planning to build so close to my field.
The herd was already relaxing. I pulled out a plastic baggie of carrot sticks and started handing them out, reassuring them all they were safe and cared for.
Gus Gus nosed into my side and I petted his shoulder. He was a pleasant brown color and one of my favorites, although I never admitted to having favorites.
My mind wandered back to June when one of the alpacas had escaped onto the highway and had to be rescued...
The crew were working close to the fence... If I opened the gate, the alpacas would be naturally curious. Although I’d need to give it a bit of time for them to truly relax enough to interfere.
I could wait a couple hours.
Wait until the work crew was gone and then loose the alpacas. They’d mess up all the stakes and strings and markings they’d put in the soil...
Grinning to myself, I handed Gus Gus the last carrot stick, petted Mulan’s flank and extricated myself form the herd. I could make some lunch for me and Aster and then we could have some fun this afternoon.
But not civil disobedience fun, not like... making out. Even though I wanted to. I couldn’t do that to Aster. I couldn’t start something that I knew would end in heartbreak. I had to protect him, not put him in a situation where only misery would follow.
I swallowed down the flood of emotions that threatened to overwhelm me, and kicked a piece of sod out of the grass. I bent to fix it, shaking my head at myself. I was behaving like an idiot. I knew the right course of action. I had to be brave enough to take it, that was all.
Aster looked up from his laptop was I walked in. “Want a grilled cheese?” I asked.
“Yeah, that sounds awesome.” Aster’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. I wasn’t sure mine did either.
I hated the tension between us so I cleared my throat. “So, um, you planning another show?” Aster’s Pride show had been the first drag event I’d ever seen, and I couldn’t wait to see another. Aster was also the first drag king I’d ever met, and damn but he was hot like that.
“Hmm? Oh, maybe. I do miss regular gigs,” Aster said. “There was basically one every week back in Sacramento.”
“I reckon a lot of the town would be keen for another,” I said. “Myself included.”
“I’d need to get back into regular practice.” Aster got up from the table and wandered over to help me with the lunch preparations. “I’ve been a bit sedentary since I moved back.”
I nodded some. “Must be hard coming up with all the choreo and stuff.”
“It’s a challenge, sometimes. I usually start with a character and a song and then just kinda see what works. Then I practice it as much as humanly possible.”
“That’s cool. I really only have knitting to occupy me outside of the farm.” I heated the pan with a generous amount of butter.
“And board games,” Aster said.