37. Even Playing Field
EVEN PLAYING FIELD
Two days later, Tasha sat on a bench in the park after work.
October had barely begun. The air carried a hint of crispness, but it was still warm in the high seventies instead of ninety. The sun pressed against her face, bright and relentless, as her gaze swept the park waiting for her ex to appear.
Hoping he would. That she could write this off as a nightmare.
But she couldn’t. She had to put one foot in front of the other.
Baker wasn’t far away. She knew that much, even if she couldn’t see him yet. There was comfort in knowing he had her back, mixed with a sting of embarrassment. That he might witness what she was about to do. What might spill from her mouth once Shane was in front of her.
The last thing she wanted was for Baker to compare himself to her past. To measure himself against a man who no longer mattered.
What she wanted, what she needed, was the man she loved now.
The one who stood steady beside her.
The one who was nothing like the men she’d chosen before.
“I knew you’d change your mind,” Shane said.
Her head turned from where he’d come behind her. Sneaking around like he had perfected it for ages.
Well hell, he had.
“About what?” she asked.
She didn’t stand for him. Didn’t give him that courtesy.
In her eyes, he didn’t deserve to be taking up the same air as her.
“That you’d want another piece of us.” His eyes roamed over her. “You still look good. I didn’t get a chance to tell you that. Got some more curves on you too. I like it. All in the right places.”
Her fist clenched on her thigh, she closed her eyes, took a steadying breath, then opened them back up and focused on his face.
“I don’t care what you think of how I look. That isn’t why I called you here.”
His smile dropped. His blue eyes, she realized now, the same color blue as Micah’s that she’d thought her son got from her. She was wrong. His eyes were intent on her, no humor, no niceness, more like annoyance.
Good. They could be on an even playing field then.
No. He’d never catch up to what she’d felt once the truth came out.
Or maybe she was wrong. Maybe he would feel it.
“Then why did you?” Shane asked. “Is this some kind of game you’re playing?”
“I don’t play games,” she said. “I need to tell you something and it’s best to do it face to face.”
Shane laughed. As if she was going to give him a tongue-lashing and he decided not to stay around for it. He stood up. “I don’t have time for this shit.”
“Sit your ass down now,” she hissed. “Don’t you leave until I tell you to.”
The sound that came out now was impatience. “You’ve got two minutes to get it off your chest, then I’m out of here. I get it. You want to let me know what you really think of me being married. You refused to hear my side of it. I told you we were on the outs.”
Her hand came up. “Just stop. You’re not eating into my time. Two weeks after I left you I found out I was pregnant.”
Shane straightened from where he was slouched on the bench. Where he was trying to come off as casually granting her the time to unload her anger.
But he was upright and tense now. Ready to battle.
She wasn’t sure what she expected, but it wasn’t that.
She heard a cough and glanced around Shane, catching sight of Baker on the bench next to them, at her ex’s back.
There Baker was, right where she needed him to lend a hand if it came to that.
She just hoped it wouldn’t and had asked him to stay out of it unless she was in trouble.
She was nowhere near being in trouble and didn’t think Shane would be stupid enough to do anything other than put his foot in his mouth.
“Bullshit,” Shane snarled. “You would have told me.”
“No, I wouldn’t. I didn’t.”
Shane looked panicked. Scared. As if his world might come crashing down when it was only balancing on a few pebbles as it was.
Not her problem.
Well, it kind of was, but she was tired of the secrets. Of the lies. Of holding this all in.
She was ready to move on with her life.
Ready to face the judgment of her friends and her peers.
Those who mattered in her life, they’d be by her side. She knew that now.
“I don’t believe you,” Shane said. “We weren’t exclusive. We never said we were.”
As if the knife couldn’t be jammed into her chest more and then twisted.
“We never had that discussion because I thought it was a given. Obviously I was wrong on your end. Not that I thought you’d admit you were married.”
He didn’t reply to that. She hadn’t expected him to.
“So what?” Shane said finally. “You want me to believe you had my kid? It’s been years, Tasha. No fucking way. I don’t buy it.” His mouth twisted. “Or did you get an abortion and now you’re just trying to stir up drama? Let me guess, it messed you up and now you can’t have kids.”
The words hit her like multiple slaps to the cheek. One after another. Brutal. Careless. Cruel.
For a split second, she couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t focus. She couldn’t even think.
She stared at him, stunned, not by the accusation, but by the man standing in front of her. That she had ever loved someone capable of saying something so vile. So casually cruel. So empty inside.
It had always been about him.
His comfort. His ego. His version of suffering. His injustice.
Never the damage he left behind.
Never the people he hurt along the way.
And in that moment, any lingering doubt she’d carried, any shred of guilt or what-if, evaporated.
This was who he was.
This told her that she’d made the right decision keeping her secret and now she’d do anything she could to make sure this man didn’t touch her child’s life.
“I can have kids. I have one. You’ve got a son.”
“Nope,” Shane said, shaking his head. “Not possible. I don’t need this shit. It’s like your form of revenge. Dumping someone’s bastard on me.”
She took a deep breath, then let it out. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Baker’s frown. The tension in his body, his urge to step in and put her ex in his place.
“I’m not dumping my son on you at all.” She turned and pulled out the documents. “I need you to take a DNA test. I knew you’d doubt it, but I want it on record.”
“No, no, no,” Shane said. “I’m not paying for some bastard that you had.”
She ground her teeth. “He’s not a bastard. He’s my son. He has two half siblings on top of it. A whole other family that he knows nothing about. I don’t want to be the person who kept him from it.”
Which was a lie because she wanted to do that, but her attorney advised she didn’t come out of the gate like that.
“You just want money or trouble for me.” He waved his hands at the papers, as if it would make them disappear. “I’m out of here.”
“Shane,” she said, her voice firm and final. “If you don’t take this paperwork and get a DNA test, I’ll have no choice but to submit it to your legal address back in Atlanta.” Which her attorney had found and was ready to send.
“You wouldn’t dare,” Shane snarled and got closer to her face. He was standing over her now. Baker looked ready to pounce, but they needed no more confrontations.
What she needed was this put behind her. This was the first step.
“I would dare. Do you think I want you in my life? I don’t. But you’re here. You sought me out. I didn’t want you to find out through someone else. I’ve seen my attorney and this is the first step. You’re accusing me of being with someone else, then prove it.”
He snatched the papers out of her hand. “You’re the one who is going to regret this. You’re going to look like a fool, and when it comes out that I’m not the father, be ready for me to make sure everyone knows you’re trying to extort money from me.”
He stormed off, leaving her sitting there staring at the other bystanders walking around, trying not to gawk at the show she’d just provided them.
Baker stood and came over next to her, pulling her under his arm.
“It’s over with.”
“Not even close,” she said. “Once his anger is done over getting hit with this, he’s going to get his attorney and do exactly what he said. He’s going to make my life hell.”
“Do you really believe that? That when it comes back that Micah is his child, that he’ll want to be in his life? Do you want him there? Financially even?”
“I don’t. I told you that. But he should know and have that choice. I can’t buy him off. I can’t tell him to leave. Once it comes back Micah is his child, I can get him for support and he knows it. But he can also push me for visitations and I can’t fight it.”
The tears fell, her fight was gone. She was just drained in a way she hadn’t felt in years.
“I’ve got you, Tasha.” He helped her up. “Let’s go home.”
“I need to get Micah at daycare.”
“Go get him, then we’ll have dinner together. I’ll pick something up.”
She was too tired to argue. Too tired to put up much of a fight when someone was being helpful.
Nor did she care if Shane was still around and watching her. Seeing her with Baker.
Maybe it’d be better if her ex did see that.
Then she asked herself why she cared what Shane thought of anything.