Chapter 11
Padraig lifted Cairren into his arms and carried her to the bed.
Someone had already turned down the sheets.
He laid her down with such gentleness that Cairren’s heart lurched.
Padraig slid onto the bed beside her. He lay on his side as his fingers grazed over her breasts.
It was the barest contact, but it made Cairren shiver as an ache began low in her belly.
She rolled onto her side and tentatively raised her hand.
When Padraig nodded, she ran her hand over the bronzed skin of his chest and shoulders.
It was clear that he trained outside without his leine; his torso, arms, and calves were darker than his thighs.
She hadn’t anticipated how much tanner he would be without his shirt covering him.
She marveled at how strong Padraig’s muscles felt under her palm.
He’d carried her twice, but the moments were so brief that she hadn’t a chance to discover the power he possessed.
She trailed her hand up his neck until she cupped his jaw.
“May I kiss you?” she whispered.
“You never need to ask, Cairren.”
She scooted closer until she could press her lips to his.
He let her control this kiss, opening to her but not thrusting forth his tongue.
Hers flicked out, brushing the inside of his mouth.
He groaned as the need to thrust into her sheath grew, but he kept himself still, encouraging her to explore, to gain more courage to discover what she liked.
She pulled back, offering him three quick kisses before she rolled onto her back, her arms open to him.
“There is no rush,” Padraig murmured, but Cairren’s eyes flashed to the door.
“Shh. Wynda will wait. She’s on your side, Cairren.
I hate saying there are sides, but we both know there are.
She won’t want you to miss out on what should be special for you.
I know my sister-by-marriage. Her first time was not enjoyable. I know she’d want better for you.”
Cairren darted another glance at the door before she nodded.
Padraig rested on his forearm as he leaned in for another kiss.
He’d tasted nothing so sweet at Cairren, her floral scent enticing, her lips soft and plump, her mouth warm and inviting.
He kissed his way down her neck, shifting down the bed to take her breast in his mouth.
As the heat from his tongue swirled around her, he flicked her nipple before drawing it into a peak.
Cairren couldn’t contain her moan or keep her back from arching, offering herself to him.
He kneaded the supple flesh of her other breast as he continued to worship the one he suckled.
He shifted again, capturing the other breast in his mouth.
His hand slid along her belly until it brushed over the satiny skin of her mons.
He’d felt nothing like it. As his fingers explored the bare skin, Cairren’s legs fell open, the invitation clear.
Padraig used the hand of the arm he rested on to massage her breast as he continued to suckle the other.
With no thatch of hair hiding the hood over her pearl, he found the source of her pleasure and slowly ran circles over it with the pad of his thumb.
He dipped a finger into her entrance, dew coating it.
She sighed at the feeling of him finally touching her where her body felt like it would go up in flames.
The ache in her belly spread, making her writhe under his ministrations as her body searched for relief.
As he dipped a second fingertip into her, she moaned again, and Padraig recognized the sound of frustration.
He eased the fingers in until he brushed her barrier.
He’d known all along that she was an innocent, but the unprovoked possessiveness he’d already experienced twice swept over him.
He couldn’t recall every feeling this way about Myrna.
He’d always assumed he would be her first and only, but the need to know, to claim what he believed was his, had never consumed him, never even entered his mind before Cairren.
He pushed thoughts of Myrna away, refusing to think of another woman while he coupled with Cairren.
She deserved more respect and loyalty, and he refused to risk her suspecting where his mind drifted to.
He worked her sheath as her hips rocked against his hand.
The women he’d bedded in the past were all experienced.
The feel of his touch was nothing new to them, and he rarely paid as much attention to their responses.
But watching Cairren discover the pleasure they could find with one another was captivating.
Her changing expressions, the sound of her breathing, how she moved as she learned what she enjoyed.
All of it mesmerized him, and his cock pulsed with unspent need.
He glanced down and noticed he was leaking, but he wanted to draw out her introduction to passion before he inevitably caused her pain.
“Padraig,” Cairren moaned. She didn’t know what to do.
Her body ached, and it was so strong that the places he touched burned with the need for something more.
She knew her body was begging for him to join his with her, but she didn’t know how to ask.
Her heels dug into the mattress but slipped along the sheets as she tried to bring his fingers deeper.
“Wheest, Ren. I know. You’re almost there.
” Padraig circled her bud again as he added more force to both his thumb and his fingers as he worked her sheath.
Her chin tilted up as her eyes squeezed shut, and he felt the spasms grip his fingers.
Cairren felt breathless as pleasure spread from within her core out through her belly as though she glided along a wave. “Open for me, little one.”
Cairren heard Padraig’s request through her haze, and she felt something thicker than his fingers pressing against her entrance.
She looked down to find Padraig’s length slowly disappearing within her.
There was an ache and a burn of a different sort as he pressed further into her, but she fought to remain calm and breathe.
She’d heard plenty of women speak of their first time and the pain.
She’d also heard plenty tell how their partner had been rough and uncaring.
Padraig seemed attuned to her and how her body reacted to his.
“Look at me, Cairren. I wish we could skip what comes next. I don’t want to hurt you, but I believe it’s inevitable. Give it a moment, and the pain will subside. But if it’s too miserable, tell me, and we will stop.”
“Won’t that make you miserable?”
“Not as much as knowing I’ve hurt you. I’ve done that enough already,” Padraig hung his head.
“Padraig?” Cairren waited for him to look at her, then she cupped his jaw.
“I trust you.” And she found that she did.
In that moment as they lay together in bed, putting aside all that had happened and the undoubtable fallout they would face in the morning, she trusted him. “Will you kiss me while…”
Padraig pressed his mouth to her, his tongue sweeping inside then thrusting, mimicking what he intended to do with his sword in her sheath.
He drove into her, breaking her barrier and barely withdrawing his tongue before her teeth snapped shut.
She whimpered as her nails dug into his upper arms where she’d wrapped her hands to brace herself.
“Ren, look at me. Shh, it’ll pass. Lie here with me, catch your breath.” Padraig’s voice soothed her as he brushed hair back from her temple. He kissed away the stray tear that fell from each eye.
“Will you kiss me again? I promise I didn’t mean to bite.”
Padraig’s smile was boyish and soft. “I ken you didn’t, little one.
” As their kiss deepened and Padraig felt Cairren’s body soften, he rocked his hips against her.
The moan that reached his ears was once again one of passion and need.
As his hips thrust forward, she raised hers and tilted to meet him.
Her hands ran over his back, leaving a trail of tingling skin until she reached his buttocks.
The next moan was deep and purely carnal as her hands grasped his chiseled backside.
She’d never imagined a part of any person’s body could be so hard and taut.
Her hands slipped into the grooves at the sides, and she found they were the perfect place to hold on.
Padraig couldn’t slow down. He was racing toward his climax faster than he could control.
His body demanded relief, but his mind demanded he ensure Cairren climaxed at least once while they were joined.
He wouldn’t cheat her out of the pleasure he was on the cusp of grasping.
He feared he was too rough, and his conscience screamed that he should be gentle.
He recognized she was far smaller than him and this was her first time, but as she met him thrust for thrust, and her moans filled his ears, he couldn’t control himself.
He panted as he tried to regain some restraint, but when he tried to slow, her fingers dug into his backside.
“No. Don’t stop. Please,” Cairren begged.
“Ren, I could only stop if you told me to, but I need you. Dear God, how could aught feel this good and not be a sin?”
“You’ll keep going?” Cairren’s eyes drifted closed as her concentration centered on how their bodies moved together.
“God, yes. Cairren, I want you more than I’ve ever wanted aught in my life. What’re you doing to me?”
“I don’t know.” Cairren’s innocent response made Padraig smile. His sweet bride with the luscious body was temptation incarnate. “I feel it again, Padraig. Like before. That feeling.”
“Good, little one. You should. I want you to.”
“Will you? I mean, will it be that way for you?”
“I suspect even better than ever before.” Before he could say more, he felt Cairren’s core clamp around him as her breath hitched.
He let go of the restraint he’d mustered, and his climax consumed him.
He’d never experienced such physical pleasure before, and as he watched Cairren with her eyes closed, he’d never felt so close to another person. Not even Myrna.
Padraig felt as much as saw Cairren’s heaving chest, and he feared he was crushing her. When he made to roll off, her eyes sprang open and her arms and legs held him in place. He saw a flash of uncertainty in her eyes, almost fear, but she whispered. “Please, not yet.”
He lowered himself back down to his forearms, brushing hair from her damp forehead. “I don’t want to go anywhere.” He kissed her with a tenderness he didn’t know he possessed. When they pulled apart, Cairren pushed hair away from Padraig’s eyes and caressed his cheek.
“Thank you for being gentle with me, for making sure this was—I don’t even know how to describe it. I’m just thankful that you thought of me.” Cairren froze as her own words sunk in. He felt her tense, and he knew what she feared.
“You fill every one of my senses, my need for you consumes me with such power that the keep could burn down around us, and I wouldn’t be able to think of aught but you.
” The kiss he pressed against her mouth was passionate.
The tender sentimentality was gone, replaced by hunger he thought he’d surely sated.
But his need for his wife made him harden within her narrow frame.
“I don’t want to hurt you any more than I have. We should stop. I should let you rest.”
Cairren shook her head. “I need this. Padraig, I don’t understand how my body aches so much when you touch me or why it’s so strong that it hurts, but please, I don’t want to stop.”
If Padraig feared he’d been too rough the first time, he’d underestimated how little control he had around Cairren.
He thrust into her over and over, holding little back as she pushed her heels into the mattress, lifting her hips to meet his every time he drove into her.
Her moans encouraged him as their kisses grew wild.
“I may never let you out of this bed,” Padraig growled.
“Only if you stay in it with me,” Cairren panted.
“I’d stay buried inside you like I am now.”
“I wouldn’t stop—” Cairren’s release ripped through, and she screamed.
“Ren!” Padraig bellowed as he followed her over the edge. He rolled them over, so she lay sprawled across his chest. “There is no way my arms will hold me up. I can barely breathe,” he panted.
Cairren could only nod. She’d only been this breathless once before.
It was when she was ten summers, and she fell from her horse.
The landing had knocked the wind out of her, and she’d panicked that she would never draw another breath.
This time, with Padraig beneath her and his arms cradling her, she wasn’t afraid.
She closed her eyes, but she needed something else.
She strained to kiss him, not sure why it felt so urgent when she still hadn’t caught her breath.
When they pulled apart, she rested her head over his heart, the steady thump calming.
“Where’d you go just now? Before we kissed. You seemed far away.”
Cairren tilted her head back and smiled.
“I was remembering when I was ten and fell from my horse. The impact left me breathless. It felt like I would never draw air into my chest again, and I remember the sense of panic. A moment ago, I felt just as breathless as I did then, but I didn’t panic.
I wasn’t scared, and I felt…” Cairren trailed off, suddenly uncomfortable admitting her feelings.
“How did you feel, Ren? Tell me. Please don’t shut me out. Not now,” Padraig’s voice was just as soothing as listening to his heart. His fingered caressed her back, and she relaxed again.
“I felt protected,” she whispered. Padraig could see her face, and a lump rose in his throat as she flinched, then squeezed her eyes shut.
It was as though she expected him to scoff at her or reject her.
Padraig realized, for Cairren, that fear was reasonable.
Nothing in the past day had made her feel protected except for when she was with her parents.
She’d admitted something that made her vulnerable, and it scared her that he would use it against her.
His heart ached to know that while she trusted him with her body, her mind—her heart—was nowhere near as sure.
“I will protect you. Not because I’m a Highlander and honor bound.
Not because you’re a lady and my wife. Because you’re you, Cairren, and you deserve to be safe.
” Padraig felt her swallow and a slight nod.
She took a deep breath before she lifted her head.
Her smile was weak, but he saw relief in her eyes.
She eased off of his body and moved across the bed.