Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“So then you ate lunch and he dropped you home with a chaste kiss on the lips?”
Nadia nodded at Cerise’s question, while she chewed on the sandwich she’d gotten from the cafeteria. Her dinner was a lot less fun than what Mitch had supplied for lunch. She’d been so full after the fried chicken and potato salad she’d eaten, Nadia thought she’d be sleeping through her shift.
Once she swallowed her mouthful, she confirmed her nod. “Yep, it was kind of a letdown after the hot kisses we’d shared at our place then at the creek.”
“Maybe they were only hot to you. Maybe he found them lukewarm.” Cerise said, but her eyes twinkled with mischief. Her friend was well on the road to recovery and for that, Nadia was extremely grateful.
“Very funny.” She tossed her sandwich wrapping at Cerise. “I’ll have you know I had plenty of evidence to suggest that he found our kisses more than lukewarm.”
Cerise fake gagged. “Hey, I’m sick and injured here, you gotta be gentle with me.”
Nadia rolled her eyes. “Puleese, I’ve heard through the grapevine that you’ve been nothing but a pain in everyone’s ass. Telling them what to do and how to dress your wounds. You know they’re professionals and know what they’re doing.”
Cerise stuck her nose in the air. “I can do it better.”
Nadia laughed at her friend’s arrogance. “You are too much. Now can we get back to Mitch, please?”
“Oh sure, Mitch and the lukewarm kisses you shared.”
“Cerise.” Nadia warned.
She held up her hands. “Fine. Fine. I mean if he was with you all the way with the kisses then I don’t think you have anything to worry about. You did say he said he wanted your first time together to not be rushed.”
“Yeah, he did.”
“But?”
“But I feel like there’s another reason why he held back. I wonder if it’s to do with his.” Nadia stopped herself from saying anything more. She had no idea if anyone knew about Mitch’s PTSD attacks and it wasn’t her place to blab about it—even to her best friend.
“To do with what? You can’t leave me hanging here, Nads.”
Nadia shook her head. No way was she going to break his confidence. “It’s nothing. You’re right, he probably just wants to make our first time special. His kiss on the lips when we parted was sensible. One touch and he sets my heart racing and I feel so alive.”
“Whoa there, city girl, are you falling for a cowboy?” Cerise asked propping herself up on her pillow.
Cerise’s question gave her pause, was she falling for Mitch?
She couldn’t deny she was definitely attracted to him and she wanted to see what happened between them, but she also wasn’t sure how long she planned to stay in Kerrville.
Her contract was for a year with the option to renew for another one.
Her initial plan had been to take this job, get a buttload of experience and then apply back to the major ER departments at Boston area hospitals. With the experience she’d gained working in a busy regional ER, she hoped that would work in her favor.
If she got a job in Boston, it would mean leaving the friends she’d made here.
Friends who were more genuine than the ones she’d had since middle school.
Also she had distance from her family. As much as she loved them, they drove her crazy and the pressure to compete with her siblings was tiring.
Here in Kerrville she could be herself and she found that she was beginning to like who she was here in Texas.
She loved the independence and freedom she had away from the glare of her family. She was needed here.
“Now you’re taking such a long time to answer my question I’m not sure that’s a good thing. What’s going on, Nadia?”
“I like Mitch, Cerise. I’d like to see what would happen with us.
But I also know that my parents would throw a fit if I told them I wanted to stay here.
They figured this job was just a temporary one, and maybe it had started out that way.
But now, I love working here. I love who I work with.
I love being able to be a hands-on doctor that I wouldn’t get the opportunity to be if I’d gotten one of the jobs I’d applied for in Boston. ”
Cerise shrugged. “Then stay.”
“If only it was that simple.”
“It really is. You’re in control of your life. You make the decisions and I’d say now you’re away from your family, you’re finding you like your independence.”
“You’re not saying anything I haven’t already thought about.”
“Well then, there you go. Decision made.”
Nadia laughed. “Maybe. But I’m not going to jump in and make stupid mistakes. My parents would have a field day with that.”
Cerise leaned forward and grabbed Nadia’s hand. “How about this—I want you to stay. Besides you promised when I get out of here that I can glitterfy you. I’m holding you to that.”
“You and your glitter. But yes, I did and I always keep my promises.” Nadia glanced at her watch. “Oh shoot, I’ve got to go. I’m already late.” She leaned over and gave Cerise a quick hug. “I probably won’t be able to pop in again. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Yep, and hopefully in a couple of days I’ll be home.”
Nadia clutched the doorframe. “I can’t wait. See ya.”
“Bye.”
As she hurried down the hall Nadia went over the conversation she’d shared with Cerise. There were so many things to think about, her career trajectory was a big one. But her possible relationship with Mitch was even bigger.
Relationships had never played a huge part in her life.
She’d been so busy concentrating on college and then medical school.
She’d had boyfriends who’d turned to lovers, but she’d never envisioned a future with them.
They’d been for-right-now boyfriends. Mitch didn’t fit in that box though.
She wanted to know all about him. She wanted to help him with his PTSD issues.
Encourage him to get help, but not force him too.
If she pressured him, she may as well kiss any chance of a relationship away.
There were so many factors for her to consider but she was excited at all the possibilities available to her. Her parents may not have thought her move to Kerrville was a good idea. But she did. It was turning out to be the best decision she’d ever made.
Mitch wiped his sweaty palms down the side of his jeans.
A sense of accomplishment had filled him when he’d made the appointment to see Dr. Valero.
Now all he wanted to do was turn around and walk away.
Facing his demons wasn’t going to be easy and he wasn’t sure he was ready to delve into the psyche of his mind.
What if he didn’t like what he uncovered the more he talked?
Intellectually he knew that he’d done everything right. He’d saved many lives during his tenure in the army. But had he done enough to help those he hadn’t been able to save?
His pocket vibrated pulling him from sinking further into the abyss of doubts. He grabbed his phone out smiled when he saw Nadia had texted him.
Hey, I just had a feeling I needed to send you a text to say you can do it. I know it’s scary but you’ve got this. Can’t wait to see you when my schedule isn’t so crazy. Nadia xxxoooxxx
How the hell had she known he was having second thoughts? That he was about two seconds away from blowing off the appointment and sucking up the fee he’d be charged. He couldn’t let her down. Couldn’t look her in the face and admit he’d been too scared to take the necessary steps to help himself.
They hadn’t seen each other since the picnic because of life and their busy schedules.
But they’d talked on the phone and they’d gotten to know each a whole lot better.
They’d talked about their families and they’d touched on his attacks.
She’d encouraged him to seek help when he’d mentioned he was considering it.
Mitch could admit he was doing this as much for Nadia as for himself.
Quickly he typed out a response. A brutally honest response because that’s what Nadia deserved.
Are you some kind of mind reader? I was standing out the front of the building getting ready to skip the appointment. Your message was timely. I’ll text you after. Mitch xx
He hit send and pocketed the phone. It vibrated again, and he didn’t need to look at it know Nadia had responded. He would check the message when he got out.
Rolling his shoulders and shaking out his arms a couple of times he strode into the building toward the bank of elevators.
The ride up to the floor was quick and he was glad he was alone.
He used the time to get his head in the right space it needed to be for the journey he was about to embark on.
He was surprised he hadn’t succumbed to another attack, he was stressed about the appointment and sometimes stress caused his attacks.
What he hoped to achieve was to find out what his major triggers were and some techniques to combat them.
He figured medical situations were high on the list, but over the last few days the urge to flex his medical muscles again had increased.
Working on the injured after the tornado had awoken his dormant medical instincts.
But he had to fix himself first before he travelled down that path.
Mitch paused when he reached the wooden door to the doctor’s office. This was it. The doubts that had bugged him out the front of the building had been tempered and he felt more in control. Nadia was right—he had this.
Fifteen minutes later, Mitch wasn’t feeling so confident. His flight instinct was kicking in again as he sat in front of Dr. Richard Valero.
“So Mitchell, good to meet you. Glad you made the time to come and see me.”
“Not sure I am,” Mitch responded.
Dr. Valero chuckled. “Not the first time I’ve heard that. You’ve taken a big step in getting help and that’s a good thing.”
“Yeah.” Mitch sighed and shifted in his seat. Dr. Valero’s scrutiny wasn’t anything sinister, but it made him feel like he was in front of his CO and was about to get a dressing down for something he’d done wrong.
“How about you tell me what you hope to get out of our sessions.” He consulted the papers in front of him. “From your Army records you voluntarily discharged a year ago and you had a couple of sessions with an Army psychologist but nothing since. Is that correct?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Relax, Mitchell, you’re a civilian now and I’m just a regular guy with a fancy degree which gives me a few extra letters after my name.”
Mitch smiled and relaxed his shoulders a fraction. “In answer to what I want out of the sessions is an understanding of my PTSD attacks. I’ve been having them more and more recently and I don’t think it’s healthy for me to keep on ignoring them.”
“Acknowledging them and seeking help is the best way to start down the road to recovery. How about you describe to me what happens when you’re in an attack? Or tell me, if you know, the triggers that can cause you to have one.”
An hour later Mitch walked out of the building and breathed deeply.
The sunlight hit his back, warming his shirt.
The office had been cold and he welcomed the heat of the day.
The session had been difficult and he’d had a minor attack while talking to Dr. Valero.
The other man had helped Mitch out and they’d worked on how to combat the possible triggers.
Mitch had also made an appointment to see him again in a couple of days.
Now that he’d started the process he wanted to get to a stage where everything was manageable and he could go back to doing what he most wanted to do in his life—be a doctor.
He loved being a doctor. Loved being able to help someone when they were injured.
Operate on them to give them back their life.
During his talk with his therapist he’d acknowledged that it wouldn’t always be successful that there would be times of tragedy and he would have to cope with that.
Mitch wasn’t about to march down to the medical center where Nadia worked to demand he be given a chance to be surgeon there, he wasn’t that dumb.
To be able to get to where he wanted to be in life, he’d need more than just one therapy session.
But in time, and after many more visits to Dr. Valero, he hoped he’d be able to get back to his purpose in life.
He couldn’t wait to tell Nadia what he’d learned and figured out in just one short session. The next chapter in his life was commencing and he wanted Nadia to feature on every page. She was becoming as important to him as breathing and he never thought he’d feel this way about a woman—ever.