Chapter 5 – Eden
EDEN
This can’t be happening.
I shove my back up against the elevator wall. Maybe if I push hard enough, I could make more space between Luke and me. He stands against the opposite wall, only three feet away from me. It’s too fucking close.
My mind scrambles to make sense of everything that happened in the past three minutes. Seeing Luke and the lobby and panicking, wondering if he’d tell Brinley I was here. Him chasing me into the elevator. His lips forming the words Prairie Smoke.
Holy shit.
Luke Windsor bought my virginity.
My best friend’s brother. The first boy I ever had a real crush on. He knows I’m a camgirl, and he’s watched me do—oh god, I don’t even want to think about all the things JAL29871 watched me do.
Maybe I was delusional to think that nobody in my life would find out about it, but it was a necessary lie.
I wouldn’t have been able to go through with the shows except by thinking of my audience as strangers.
Anonymous faces who’d never know the real me.
I didn’t let myself imagine someone I know might watch it. Well, someone did. And not just anyone.
The last person on earth I’d want watching me touch myself.
My eyes dart up toward Luke’s. His ocean-colored eyes are completely shuttered.
I have no idea what he’s thinking, whether he’s judging me or laughing at me.
He’s not looking at me with desire, that’s for sure.
His eyes don’t dip down to my body, to the stupid dark coat I wore over a minidress and heels, like I’m someone’s mistress in an old movie.
No, Luke doesn’t want me. He never has. Which means he was only following PrairieSmoke to feel superior to me.
Fury fills my mind like wildfire, burning through fear and humiliation and taking over everything.
“Six weeks,” I snap. “You spent six weeks sitting in the dark, watching me strip for you. You saw my body. You heard my voice. You seriously expect me to believe that you just figured out it was me tonight?”
His mouth opens. Whatever he wants to say, I don't want to fucking hear it.
“You sat next to me at your sister's birthday and Maura’s gallery shows, and the whole time, you were getting off to me without me knowing.
That's sick. It's disgusting, and it's fucking wrong. You sat across from me at Friendsgiving for hours, knowing you were going to buy my virginity and pretending you didn’t know who I was. Pretending you were normal, instead of some pervert taking advantage of his sister’s best friend!”
“Eden.” He's about to try and charm me out of being mad at him, like he charms everyone. Well, that's not happening.
“No, you don't get to talk,” I say loudly, before he can say anything other than my name. “You don't get to be the calm one when I just walked into this hotel to lose my virginity to a stranger, only to find out that the stranger was Luke Windsor, trying to humiliate me.”
“Humiliate you?” he echoes disbelievingly.
“Why else would you do it? Obviously, you just want to hold it over my head for the rest of my life. Every Christmas, every Friendsgiving, every time Brinley invites us both to anything, you’ll be able to lord it over me about the time you paid $1.3 million for my virginity.”
“No,” he chokes out. “God, no, I’d never—”
I don’t wait for him to finish that sentence.
I’m running on rage and embarrassment, and I need him to feel at least a fraction of it, too.
“I should have known JAL two-six-whatever the numbers were, it was obviously someone like you. A loser who pays to watch from the dark, because the dark is the only place where you actually like yourself.”
Luke’s jaw tightens, and I know the barb landed. He doesn’t try to defend himself anymore.
The elevator numbers tick up, and I arbitrarily jab my finger on the button for the 50th floor.
“You’re getting off there,” I snap. “We’re done talking.
If you even try to come to the suite, I’ll call security.
Because I need the peace and quiet to figure out what I’m going to do with the rest of my life, and you’re going to take the stairs back to your car and never speak to me ever again. ”
I cross my arms and dare him to say another word.
He doesn’t.
He just pulls the emergency stop.
The car jolts to a stop, sending me stumbling on my heels. An alarm chirps, low and mechanical. I gape at him.
“Are you serious right now—”
A voice emerges from the speaker before I can yell at him anymore.
“Hello. Our system shows that the emergency stop was activated. Are you in need of assistance?”
Luke presses a button to speak back. “Hi. Everything’s fine. This is Luke Windsor—you should have my card on file.”
There’s a pause on the other line, then the sound of typing. “Yes, I have your information, Mr. Windsor.”
“Fantastic. Listen, my friend and I were in the middle of a conversation that needs to be had in private. If I were to tip you, say, $15,000, could that buy me fifteen minutes in this elevator?”
Another pause. “I—well, there are two other people working the front desk tonight, Mr. Windsor.”
Something like approval flashes across Luke’s face. “Of course, you need to look out for your coworkers. I’d be happy to write them checks for the same number.”
“I think your request can be arranged, Mr. Windsor.” The voice sounds downright thrilled. “Thank you for staying at the St. Regis.”
In the upper corner of the elevator, a small light blinks out. The security camera is off. Our privacy has officially been purchased.
I stare at him, stunned. “Did you just bribe a five-star hotel into trapping me in an elevator?”
He sighs. “No. You can press that button right now and tell the operator to send the elevator down immediately. I won’t stop you. I just want three minutes of your time. If you still want to walk after that, you can go ahead. You’ll never hear another word from me about any of this, I promise.”
I don’t press the button. I cross my arms and wait, because if I don’t listen, I know I’ll spend weeks of my life wondering what he might have said.
When I don't immediately call the operator, Luke’s posture relaxes a little. He retreats back to his side of the elevator, giving me space as he talks.
“There's a reason I never asked for your name on CamCuties.
It's because I didn't want PrairieSmoke to be a real person.” He fiddles with his hands for a second before shoving them in his pockets.
“After that article went viral, being with anyone felt too high stakes.
All a hookup would have to do is email the Toronto Tea and I'd be all over the internet again.
I needed someone… safe. Just one woman who couldn't break my life.
One person I didn't have to perform for who I didn't even know.
That's what I thought I had. Until I realized that you weren't a stranger at all.”
I swallow. “What gave me away?”
“Your birthmark. The one on your lower back.
I saw it on the poster, right before the auction started.
I recognized it from when you visited Brinley when we were kids.
I could've called Brinley or Beau, but I didn’t because I respect your privacy.
I bid on you instead because there were five strange men in the auction who could have walked into that suite tonight.
I couldn't live with any of them winning, any of them taking that from you.
“I'm not here to sleep with you. I have no intention of taking what I paid for. I just came here to make sure that nobody else did. As soon as we leave this elevator, that auction never happens. You'll walk out of this hotel with your virginity intact, and I’ll let you keep the money. Brinley will never know, and your brothers will never have to know.”
He shoots me a self-conscious smile, like we've both embarrassed ourselves and he's offering me an out. My nails dig into my arms through the fabric of my coat. I believe his explanation—he didn't do this to humiliate me. It makes sense why Luke would opt for a camgirl after Peppermint's article.
It doesn't make me any less furious at him.
When he placed his bid, he stole my choice from me.
The choice I spent six weeks sitting with and eight hours preparing for.
I walked into this hotel on my own two feet because I chose to.
My decision wasn't Luke’s to stop or override.
He paid $1.3 million and bought himself the right to walk into my hotel suite and tell me what to do with my own body.
I don't give a fuck what his reasons were.
I didn't need him to save me from myself.
Even though under that fury, there's a tiny threat of relief. The auction felt like a mistake from the second the bidding closed, but I'm not telling him that. I'm not telling anyone, ever.
“I won’t take the money,” I say. “I'm not taking $1.3 million from my best friend's brother as a favor. It's not happening. I’m desperate, but not that desperate.”
He frowns. “You must need the money, Eden. I know you wouldn’t have gone this far unless you were desperate.”
“You don’t know a single thing about me,” I snap. Even though he’s right, he doesn’t get to act like he’s doing me a favor.
“I know that you’re smart,” he retorts. “Smart enough to know how risky it is to meet a stranger like this. You must have calculated the risk and decided it was worth it, which means you need the money. Take it. I have it.”
I roll my eyes. “You just have a million bucks to give away.”
“Yeah,” he says, almost defiantly. “Yeah, I do. And I know if you don’t take it from me, you’ll go right back to CamCuties and have another auction. You’re not leaving this elevator without the money.”
“No.” I’m aware that the way I say it makes me sound like a petulant child, and I hate it.
“Then we’ll stay here for as long as it takes.” He leans back against his elevator wall casually, like he’s waiting for a bus. Or rather, like he’s a model pretending to be a guy waiting for a bus.
“I don’t want it, Luke. I won’t take it.”
“Then how do I guarantee you won’t pull the same stunt again in a week?”
“I guess you’re going to have to trust me.”
“I don’t. I know you’re trustworthy,” he adds before I can argue. “I’d trust you to take care of Brinley if she was sick, or watch my dog, if I had one. You’re a reliable person. But you need the money, and right now, you have no other plans to get it.”
“I could get a job.”
“You’ve been job-hunting for months, Eden. If you don’t have a job, it’s because there isn’t one available.”
“Or maybe my resume just sucks.”
He laughs. “Don’t lie. I’ve known you for fifteen years, Eden. Your resume is perfect. Seriously, Eden. Would it be so bad to borrow some money from me?”
I frown. I would rather pull out every one of my teeth. My pride hurts enough from him finding out about my camgirl gig. Owing him money on top of that would destroy me.
Luke’s eyes narrow, like he’s reading something in my expression. Then he nods.
“Let’s make a deal,” he says.
“What kind of deal?” I ask cautiously.
“I’ll give you two weeks to find a job, or some other explanation of where you’re getting the money. If you find it, great. If you don’t, then trust me, I’ll find a way to make your bank account $1.3 million higher.”
“What happened to not trusting me?”
“I still don’t. But right now, I’m not sharp enough to argue with you. I think we’d both like to walk out of this elevator and forget tonight ever happened.”
I scrutinize his face for a long moment.
The version of Luke Windsor in this elevator isn’t the version I’ve spent the last fifteen years watching.
He’s not charming, smooth, and enthusiastic.
He just looks tired, like he’s been on his feet since the auction ended and hasn’t decided yet who he's going to be when this is over.
“Fine,” I sigh. “Officially, nothing happens tonight. We're just two people who happen to take the same elevator.”
Luke exhales. “Sounds good. It’s just…look, I don't know about you, but I could really use a drink right about now. Have a drink with me at the bar. Then we'll forget this ever happened.”
I hesitate. I could abso-fucking-lutely use a drink right now. Besides, it would probably be good for Luke and I to reestablish normalcy around each other, so we don’t end up acting suspiciously awkward the next time we’re in a room together.
“Fine,” I say, nodding. “One drink.”
Luke flashes a small, slightly shaky smile. He releases the emergency stop and the little red light on the camera blinks back on. I press the button for the lobby, and the elevator begins a slow descent.
Neither of us speaks as the numbers on the panel tick down. I stare down at my shoes while Luke stares at the doors. We seem to have silently agreed that any words would be better exchanged after alcohol has been procured.
The elevator doors open, and I instantly realize that my nightmare day is nowhere close to over.
Brinley’s standing in the lobby between the elevator bank and the front doors. Behind her are three very large, very familiar men in worn jeans, flannels, and sturdy outdoor coats. All four of them turn to look at us at the same moment.
Wade, Jasper, and Reed are here. My brothers somehow figured out where to find me. They all scowl as their eyes lock on me—and on Luke.