Chapter 27 #2
‘But Auntie Alex never cries. She’s the most supercool, got-it-together human on the planet. With the exception of when she drinks two blue cocktails at an awards ceremony, of course.’
‘Auntie Alex has cried more in the past month than most of her life put together.’
‘Because of Mum’s big secret, or the other stuff?’
‘Both.’
She picked at her lip.
‘I’m scared.’
I wrapped my arms around her, cradling her narrow shoulders like I did when she was younger. ‘Me too. But I promised it would be okay, and I meant it. We might have a tough ride ahead of us, but whatever happens, we will get through it.’
‘And no one is dying?’
‘No.’
‘Not even Nana?’
‘Okay, Nana is not a well woman. I can’t make any promises about her. But all of us are dying, when you think about it.’
‘What a jolly, festive thought.’
I rested my chin against the top of her head, savouring this precious moment while also knowing it was down to me to cheer things up a bit.
‘How about cheese on toast, with a hot chocolate?’
‘Do you eat cheese on toast every night?’
‘I’m making up for years of no gluten or dairy. So, quite possibly, yes.’
‘It’s almost two. The kids will probably be up in four hours.’
‘Then we might as well make the most of the peace while we have it. Come on, I want to hear all about Zendon, college and this new nail business.’
‘Really? Because I’m knackered. Can we watch the rest of Polar Express instead?’
I decided to wait until a more sociable hour before sending the photo I’d chosen to the Advent Challenge chat.
Lennon, Harley and Kaylynn in a tangled octopus of arms and legs, hair mussed and angelic faces rosy, Ernest squeezed in with them.
It would be a day late, but the advent challenge word for Friday was PRICELESS.
We made it through Saturday, just about.
It swiftly became clear that inviting children to stay on the spur of the moment was not setting us up for success.
I’d dumped anything perishable from the fridge before leaving, so the only breakfast item in the house was oats, and we’d used up all the milk I’d brought from Crandon the night before.
The offer of going to a café was firmly rejected.
These kids were not up to eating out, even if I could find somewhere open at six-forty on a Saturday morning.
I tried cajoling them into at least coming to the shop with me, reluctant to wake up Bronte and ask her to babysit after persuading her to stay up so late with me.
Lennon kept demanding I order Uber Eats, refusing to believe that such a service didn’t exist this far into the countryside.
An online shopping delivery wouldn’t arrive until tomorrow.
For a moment, I considered asking someone – Will or Merry – to bring food over, but that was admitting defeat before we’d even started.
If the kids were living with me, I’d need to learn how to handle spontaneous challenges.
Of course, if the kids were living with me, I’d need to be prepared. Plus, accept all the help I could get. It took another twenty-four hours or so for me to realise that, though.
In the end, I reheated the leftover chips, with the promise they could have whatever they wanted for lunch.
Harley devoured his happily, but Lennon grew tearful about not having his usual cereal, and the clumsy way I handled that led to him banging his head against the wall, seriously upsetting Kaylynn.
I felt horrible at how badly I was messing this up.
After an endless morning watching TV, drawing Christmas cards, playing every game I could think of that only needed a pen and paper, building a blanket fort under the kitchen table and finding more activities for them to play with for about three minutes before they got bored and started squabbling or wrestling with each other again, Bronte finally woke up.
She took one look at my wan face and suggested it was time to walk Ernest. I’d not dared take the kids on a walk myself in case Lennon took off again.
Really, he could do with his own lead, Bronte mused, but that led to the genius idea of him holding Ernest’s lead, a challenge he was keen to accept.
The walk was a merciful respite. Although Kaylynn couldn’t go far, the boys used up plenty of energy lugging branches, squelching in muddy puddles, cavorting with Ernest and generally relishing the fresh air.
By sheer coincidence, the advent challenge word was OUTSIDE, and I felt a smidgen of pride as I sent my contribution along with the photos of Darya and Lola wild swimming, Donovan feeding the birds in his garden and Merry and Joel each linking arms with a newly returned Ray as they walked the Christmas trail at Newstead Abbey.
Will sent a video of his family dancing to a brass band playing carols at an outdoor Santa’s grotto, reindeers in the background, and for a moment I wondered whether if I’d spoken to him, he’d have invited me and we could have all gone together.
Then I pictured the reality of Lennon, Harley and Kaylynn loose in the vicinity of large animals, a food truck and a huge pile of presents, and felt grateful we were out here in the middle of nowhere, instead.
As if to prove me right, a split second after taking one last gorgeous shot of us all balancing on a log, Lennon pushed Kaylynn off.
She landed spreadeagled in the freezing cold mud.
Harley then felt the need to join her, doing vigorous ‘mud-angels’ while I tried to comfort his sister, and Bronte yet again set off after Lennon, who in the heat of the moment couldn’t anticipate that running off meant he was in double trouble.