Twenty-One
Twenty-One
GUNNER
?
Feeling like I’ve been hit with a Mac truck. My head’s filled with cotton balls, my arm feels like it’s been through a meat grinder. And yet, I’m still aware enough to know shit has gone so far left with my woman and my son. Despite my anger at discovering why I was the target, my focus was on Savvy and how she spoke to our son. That shit was out of line. I know she’s used to being the boss. Believing the last word and decision is hers and hers alone. I understand her anger, but it only takes one look in her eyes to see the truth.
Savvy was scared.
Watching my son react to her words, the pain in his eyes and the slumping of his shoulders nearly sent me to my knees. I hated to see the look in his eyes because I know what it is to disappoint the one person you strive to make proud. Blaze made a choice that was the right one, and Savvy needs to understand that. Blaze isn’t just our son, he’s also a brother in my club, not only a member of the organization. If there is a threat to the club, or to me. He, along with all the brothers, knows to come to me or my VP. He wasn’t wrong in that. He would never be wrong in that, no matter how pissed off Savvy gets about it. I’m damn proud of him because, until tonight and this moment, I wasn’t sure if he would ever see us, me and the brothers in the club, for who and what we are. Family. Family to love, protect, and cherish. Now to get his pissed meerkat of a mother to understand that.
As I watch Blaze retreat from our little group, my good hand hangs as I clench and unclench my fists in frustration at the situation. My eyes leave Blaze meeting my other sons, Bull and Vex, whose eyes bounce back and forth between us. I can see that they understand what their brother is going through and want to go with him. I smirk at how close my boys have become in the last year and a half. I also see indecision in their eyes on what to do. Unfortunately, or fortunately, this isn’t the first time my boys have seen me banged up. With a nod in their direction. Vex visibly sags in relief at my okay to follow his brother. Bull looks between me and Savvy and back to me, his eyes remaining on mine. So many emotions swirl in them and I understand without words that he isn’t happy with me or what just went down with his brother and Savvy.
“I’m good boy. Go to your brother.”
As the last words leave my lips, Savvy turns her glare on me. And unlike my son, she is about to learn real quick that I will not put up with her shit. I’ve let this woman run roughshod over me because I deserved it, but we are past that now. She has accepted my claim as my woman and she needs to understand exactly what that means. Her little fit out here with Blaze shouldn’t have happened. She is in my world now, and she needs to respect the order of things. Which I know is going to be a hard as-hell pill for her to swallow, being a boss in her own right. Savvy is used to being in charge, being the one to make the decisions, and the one our children go to. And then it clicks.
Turning away from her. I look over when I feel a tug on my arm. Doc has been working on me since Savvy dug the bullet out of my arm not so gently. The shit still throbs, but dealing with my family and cleaning this shit up is more important.
Looking around, I hadn’t noticed the road had become busy with activity while I was being patched up. I’ve always known the capacity of the organization, but to see it in action is something else. The unmistakable unmarked vehicles of the organization’s cleanup crew dot the road with a few additions. My eyes find Petrov, who is standing on the side of the road speaking to a group similarly dressed like him. I assume they are his men. When our eyes connect, his narrow as he takes me in from head to toe before turning away and barking out orders in Russian. He turns and stares at me as his men disperse, but I don’t break eye contact with him until he turns away to say something to one of his men and walks toward his awaiting vehicle.
I hadn’t known he’d arrived. I guess I wouldn’t have since it had to have happened during the gunfight and before my club brothers came to my rescue.
My eyes leave where he is standing and look around, taking in the scene and not seeing what I’m expecting. I chuckle, realizing they’ve up their game. There isn’t a cop or paramedic in sight, but there are an ambulance and cruisers stationed on either side of where we are currently standing. Before I ask, Bellamy must see the question in my eyes.
“Oh, yeah. Well, you know we didn’t want an innocent bystander to come across this and want to be a hero. So you know… Badda Bing Badda Boom. Cop cars and ambulances for you.” She chuckles.
I shake my head at her explanation, expecting nothing less from my girl. Taz gives me a look and a shrug. He knows that is all the explanation we are going to get about it. With a nod, he turns and pulls her away, no doubt to give me a moment with my still fuming woman.
Looking at Savvy, she is glaring at the road, bloody fists clenched at her sides as she mumbles to herself. I look down at Doc who catches my eye understanding what I want. He mumbles he’ll deal with the rest of my injuries at the clubhouse and he takes off.
When I take a step toward Savvy, she doesn’t react. Her back remains to me, but I know she can feel me. She always feels me as I feel her. As much as I want to pull her into my arms and reassure her, I’m okay. She and I need to have a few words. Releasing a breath, knowing how pissed she is, this conversation is going to get ugly. I’d rather do it here and now than at the clubhouse because our rules are different. The brothers may have given her leeway in the past, but that’s over now and her getting froggy with me there will not fly. Hell, Bellamy has learned that lesson on more than one occasion. So that is a fight I’m just not in the mood for. And honestly, when I get back, I’ll have shit to do and a bitch to hunt down and deal with my fucking way. Savvy needs to know now that, even if this Julia bitch is her past, she is squarely in my present and came for me. And when you send for me, I’ll come for you and come hard. The shit with Beverly was different, and Savvy needs to understand who the fuck I am. I allowed her and our kids to do their thing and I appreciated them coming to my, Princesses, and the club’s aid, but she needs to know that I’m not some weak motherfucker that can be so easily fucked with without repercussions.
“When he is wearing his cut Savvy, you are his mother, not his boss. His mother.” I say my voice even, but letting her know exactly whose side I’m on.
She whips around, leveling me with a glare, one that I’ve become immune to.
“Nope, before you pop off. Fucking listen. I’ve let you say and do shit out of respect for you. I’ve taken more shit from you than I have anyone in my forty-plus years of life, and I deserved it. I know I deserved your ire and wrath. But in this, when it comes to my club, you don’t get a say.” The deadly glare she gives me makes it clear my words are pissing her off. Before she can respond, I raise my hand with a shake of my head and a glare of my own, one I wouldn’t usually level on her. One that lesser men would shrink away from. One that says that I am not talking shit, but damn serious. A glare this situation, unfortunately, calls for.
“You don’t get to come down on one of my brothers because he didn’t do something the way you wanted him to. Son or not, member of the organization or not. When Blaze is wearing my club’s colors, he is mine. He follows my lead, my orders, and my decree as a brother of my club.” I glare at her. She’s pissed, but so am I.
“You. Do. Not. Run. Shit. Here.” I step closer, leveling her with a look that says I’m not backing down from this. “You do not disrespect him. You do not make demands of him. And you sure as shit do not embarrass him in front of his club brothers.” My anger is palpable, and she knows it, her lips thin, but her anger fades from her eyes.
I know what had her pissed off. I understand where she was coming from, the worry for me. I know the moment she’d heard that something had gone down and I could be in some shit. She went into Widowmaker mode. Savvy was scared, and that fear had her lashing out at our son. I get it. I do. Sometimes, she can’t be that. Sometimes she has to let someone else hold the reins. I take a breath, my anger and frustration dissipating, knowing that I need her to hear me and understand me about this.
Wrapping my good arm around her waist, she stiffens, but I don’t relent. My eyes soften as I take in every curve of her face. Leaning in, I kiss her lips, one that she doesn’t return.
Still pissed.
“You were scared and felt out of control. I get it. I understand it. Sometimes shit is going to be out of your control, baby. Our kids are not always going to do what you want. You’ve spent their entire lives being their person, their mother, leader, shoulder to cry on, confidante, friend, and advisor. And now they have me.”
She goes to speak, but I kiss her again, cutting off her response. This time she lets me in and the world fades away as I taste her hurt, anger, and fear on her lips. Reluctantly, she melts into me and I count it as a small win.
“You will always be their mother. They will always need you. I will always need you. Let go a little. Let them live their lives. Let our son find his way without you. He didn’t do what he did, to spite you. He wasn’t trying to disrespect you. You have to know that…” I pause. “He made a choice tonight. His decision made it clear that he was all in. To see me as he sees you. To respect me as he respects you. When he is wearing his club colors, and when shit is about the club, tonight he showed me he showed all of us he will do what is best for the club. And Savvy, I respect and appreciate him for that. You can’t hold that against him. We had this conversation when he and the boys patched in. You know this but your fear… Your fear for me baby… it got the better of you.”
Savvy’s eyes shine, and I know she’s still pissed, but she hears me, she understands me.
“The choice he made was a hard call. You know it was. So you coming down on him the way you do, that hurt, baby. That hurt him badly. You gotta make that right, yeah.” I say, kissing her softly, wincing when her hand comes up to my bad shoulder.
“Shit.” She pulls away
Savvy looks into my eyes and then to my shoulder. She checks the bandage wordlessly and begins fussing with it. I know this is her way of processing what I said and how she feels. She knows I’m right, though, even if she doesn’t like our new normal.
“Yo Prez. I got one of the prospects loading your bike up and dropping it at the shop. Do you need anything else?”
I look up and away from my woman to see Boomer jogging over to me. His eyes take me in, then trail to Savvy. He stops next to us, brows lower in concern for my woman, who has a look of devastation in her eyes. I don’t know if it is because of my bike being turned into Swiss cheese or the fact that she realizes she may have fucked up with our boy. Either way, I pull her to my side.
“Oh, you alright Miss Savvy?”
She tries to give Boomer a reassuring smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. I pull her closer to my side.
“Yeah, that’s good. Did someone bring an SUV to ride back?” Not acknowledging the question in his eyes.
He looks between me and Savvy again, but doesn’t comment when she lowers her head and stares at the ground.
“Yeah… uh, VP left keys with Miko to drive you and Miss Savvy back to the clubhouse. We loaded up his and Doc’s bikes cause they are going to ride back with you. Uh… Miko and Doc are over there.” He points to where one of the club SUVs is parked on the side of the road.
Looking down at Savvy, she is now glaring off into nothing.
Shit.
“Let’s go, baby. You can gather your thoughts and read my ass for filth on the way back to the clubhouse.”
She says nothing as she allows me to direct her to the vehicle.
She does although read my ass once the door to the SUVs closed. Some of what I expected came flying out of her mouth while she fussed over me. Never talk to her like I did and such. She also admitted she needed to apologize to our son. And admitted that it is going to take some time to get used to not being in charge of shit all the time.
Well, she is going to have to get used to it quickly, because I will not sit back and play by anyone’s rules but my own.