Chapter 35
CHAPTER 35
YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE ME KILLED.
Griffin
Exiting my truck, I round the hood to let Blair out.
Her eyes widen as she steps out, taking in the ranch. Likely because she’s never seen it this close before. At least that I know of. Lily could have brought her here to ride one day for all I know. Either way, I’m treating this like her first time here.
Because it’s her first time with me .
I interlock her fingers with mine, guiding her inside the open barn.
With every step toward the horses’ stalls, my nerves heighten.
Of all my horses I’ve never let anyone near Storm before.
He’s the one thing that’s always been mine. The one thing no one can take from me, and that won’t willingly leave me.
Once we reach the stall I let go of her, despite my body screaming to keep holding on, and I unlock the stall gate. Entering first, I turn to find her still standing there, staring at Storm with worry in her eyes.
“Come on”—I gesture to the horse—“He won’t hurt you.”
“Are you sure? He looks mean.”
I shake my head, huffing out a laugh. “I promise. ”
Her head snaps in my direction, and I know those two little words hold more power than I meant for them to hold. Instantly my head swirls with ideas of her past and promises that she thought would remain true but ended up broken.
I move to stand before her, bending to level my gaze with her.
“I promise,” I repeat the words that now hold more meaning.
She swallows before she nods and follows me into the stall. Storm lifts a foreleg, stomps his hoof in the hay, and shakes his head with a neigh.
She brings her hands up in defense as if he’s about to attack.
“That’s his way of saying hi,” I tell her, before moving to put the halter on him and securing it in place. Once it’s secure I give him a small pat on the head. I swallow past a nervous lump in my throat because I want her to know all of me. But it’s scary to open up past a physical connection. “Storm has been in my life since my ex left. A light inside of me died, and I had a feeling I would spend the rest of my life alone. I needed an outlet. I needed some peace in my life and something that brought me an inkling of joy.”
She remains quiet to let me continue.
“I want you to see that too. I’m not sure if you’ve ever ridden a horse before,” I say, grinning as I turn my head to face her. “But I want to know if you want to give Storm a ride?”
“I…” She pauses. “I don’t know, Griffin. From watching television shows, can’t the horses tell if you’re nervous? I really don’t want to be thrown off a horse when I’m having a good day.”
“You’re having a good day?”
She rolls her eyes as if I should already know, but smiles. “Yes.”
“Why?”
“For starters, I woke up aching everywhere.” She winks at me. “The good kind of ache that makes me want more.”
“Blair,” I cut her off with a warning tone .
Just remembering last night sends blood straight to my cock. That was not how I wanted it to happen, nor was it my reason for taking her out there. But it happened and I don’t regret it for a second. It was perfect. I know the reason behind that is the woman standing in front of me.
“And then this cowboy showed up at my work this morning to bring me coffee,” she continues, the corners of her mouth rising painfully slow into a smile. “And that’s when I realized I was having the best day. All of this to say, I’m not sure I want to be thrown off a horse today.”
She laughs, and I just offer her a weak smile.
“I won’t let that happen,” I say honestly.
She stares at me as if she’s trying to figure out if I’m telling the truth. I guide the horse out of his stall before making my way to the small tack room to grab his saddle. Taking the time to mount it on his back before making sure everything is in place and safe.
The last thing I would want is for her to get hurt. If I thought Storm would throw her off him there’s no way we would be here right now.
It’s a big deal to bring someone here, because this is my safe space. The one thing that’s mine. Opening this part of me up to someone when I haven’t heard the words I’ve wanted to hear is only opening myself up for the potential for heartbreak.
It’s becoming a risk I’m willing to take with her.
Can I make her stay?
If she breaks my heart, then it’s just another lesson I’ve learned too late.
I don’t give her a choice before I interlock her hand in mine again and use my other to guide Storm out of the barn and into the open field. The skies are gray as if it might rain any minute.
I gesture to Storm. “I’ll help you up.”
She looks from me to the horse and back to me before taking slow steps across the tall grass to get on him. She reaches up to grab the pommel and hooks one foot in the stirrup. Standing behind her, I grip her waist to give her a little boost up.
She mounts the horse as if she’s done it a hundred times before, like she’s been riding all her life.
The idea of it excites me, while simultaneously turning me on. Riding is my life outside of the bar; and seeing her on my horse only ignites the feelings racing through me that have been growing for her. If I didn’t want everything with her before this, I sure as fuck do now.
“How does it feel?” I ask, keeping the reins tight in my hand.
“This feels like nothing I ever imagined.” She laughs. “I’ve never been on a horse before. It’s scary. It’s exciting. It’s…can we go?”
This woman .
I nod, guiding Storm through the field at a slow walking pace. I’m unable to take my eyes off Blair as she looks forward. Every so often her eyes trail down to the top of the horse's head, making sure the horse is good. I can tell by her white knuckles that she’s holding on for her life.
“I can see why you like this,” she says. “It feels…calming.”
“Most of the time it is. Other times it’s exhilarating. When Storm and I need to blow off steam it’s fast and wild.”
“That sounds…wow. I hope to feel that someday.”
I stop walking, which forces Storm to stop too. Turning my body to face Blair, I give her a look. The look in my eyes asking if she’s ready for that right now, letting a grin form on my face.
“Oh no.” She waves her hand around, keeping the other tight on the pommel. “You’re going to have me killed.”
I reach up, cupping the outside of her hand gripping the pommel, and pull myself up behind her. Swinging my leg around the other side of the horse until I’m sitting directly behind her in the saddle. My other arm reaches around, caging her in. She leans back, melting into me, and I fight the urge to just hold her up here. Not move or go anywhere. Just simply hold her the way I want to .
Bringing my lips to the shell of her ear, I pause, inhaling her scent. She smells like sugar from working today. The kind of sweet I want to devour.
“Are you going to be a good girl and hold on tight for me?” I whisper.
I want to regret the words as soon as they leave my lips, because now I’m more turned on than ever. With Blair, any filter I have is out the window. Her back stiffens, and I don’t miss the way she sucks in a sharp breath before placing one hand on my thigh and adjusting her grip under my hand on the pommel.
She nods, before turning her head to the side, looking at me out of the corner of her eyes in front of me. “Let’s ride, cowboy.”
Pressing a kiss to her shoulder, I take the reins in one hand and wrap my other hand around her midsection to hold her against me while urging Storm to move quickly.
He takes off the only way he knows how with my command.
Blair’s grip on my thigh tightens as we move in perfect rhythm through the field. I guide the horse onto an open trail, where we gallop at a steady pace until we reach the outside of the lake. She turns her head to take in the view, and I can tell she has a look of wonder in her eyes while she takes it all in. With her back pressed to my chest, I feel the worry drain from her body as she slowly inhales the crisp mountain air before releasing it.
For a small town, there’s so much to see.
One lake, but fifty different ways to view it.
One woman in my arms, and a hundred different ways to love her.
Is that what this is?
My heartbeat pounds in my chest while my hold on her tightens. This feeling is stronger than ever. The need to tell her. I can do it right here and now. Whispering the feelings I have in her ear with just three little words.
But something stops me.
Blair lets go of the saddle and my thigh, bringing both arms out to the side as if she’s a bird in the wind. Letting her head tilt up to the sky, she stays locked in that position as the rest of our bodies move with the gallop of the horse.
This is her letting go.
This is her feeling the freest she’s ever been.
Without saying the words, I know that to be true because I once did the same thing on this very horse.
Once we turn back onto the trail, her hands come down as she holds me for the rest of the ride. I do the same, not wanting this to end, but also eager to spill everything on my mind.
We reach the open field outside of the barn and come to a stop. I dismount the horse first, reaching for her waist as she puts her hand on my shoulders and leans into me for support as I guide her off the horse’s back.
“That was amazing.” She beams. “I can’t believe I was afraid of that. I felt so free.”
I guide Storm to the wooden beam set up outside the barn and secure him to it. “It’s amazing, isn’t it?”
She answers me with closed eyes, tilting her head to the sky and deeply inhaling the moment. The smile that stretches her face tells me she’s letting herself feel the peace and serenity that comes with the ranch.
I stare at her, unable to wipe the smile off of my face.
I’m in love with this woman standing before me.
If I questioned it before, there’s no doubt about it now.
She turns to face me, and it’s as if she can hear the words in my head when she grabs my hand and guides me into the barn.
She stops me in my tracks once we’re tucked under the opening, spinning around to face me. She wraps her arms around my neck. I pull her into me, holding her body flush with mine. She reaches up to press her lips to mine.
She’s claiming me with this kiss.
My hands find the small of her back to keep her pressed into me. She angles her head just enough to deepen the kiss. Another reminder of how everything she does turns me on .
Despite my hold, she leans her hips into me. I know she can feel what she’s doing to me. I know she can feel my cock hardening in my jeans at just the press of her lips on mine.
“Blair,” I say, pulling away from the kiss and letting my forehead fall to hers. “What are you doing to me?” I breathe out.
She smiles against my mouth. “I’m losing control with you.”
I pull back. Her eyes twinkle in the dim barn light and like every time before this that I’ve stared into them, I find myself lost. In a complete trance.
I lift her in my arms, and she wraps her legs around my waist on instinct. Her lips are on mine in seconds as I walk her over to the little bunk room off to the side that never gets used.
I kick the door shut behind me, but I don’t let her go. I spin her, pressing her back against the door. Driving my hips against her, she moans into my kiss.
“I’m not going to push this, but I want you, Blair,” I say honestly, holding her up. She grinds her hips against me, chasing the pleasure. “You turn me on in the most unimaginable ways.”
“Stop being a gentleman and fuck me, Griffin,” she pants out. With her hands behind my head, she pulls my face to her with a searing kiss.
I let her feet stand on the ground. Both of us ripping at each other’s clothes. As if we both can’t wait another minute to feel this as our lips locked in a frenzied kiss for all of it.
To my surprise, she stops, taking a step back and letting her eyes trail my body. I reach for the hem of the T-shirt I had on under my flannel and pull it over my head. Bringing her bottom lip between her teeth, she stares at me with eyes that are begging me to claim her.
I have every intention of doing so .
“Blair,” I growl, and her head snaps up to meet my stare. “I should warn you,” I start before bringing my body close to hers, gripping her chin between my fingers and forcing her to look up at me. “I’m going to fuck you as hard as you just eye-fucked me. ”
She smirks. “I just didn’t know how much muscle you had under those flannels all this time.”
Moving fast, I lift her in my arms again and sit her down on the desk in the corner of the room. Hooking a finger in the side of her panties, I swipe a finger through her already wet pussy.
“Tell me,” I breathe out. “Tell me how bad you want my cock, sweetheart.”
“So bad,” she moans.
Letting her head fall back, I trail kisses down her neck. My lips brush over her pulse pounding hard and fast just below the surface. “Your pussy is begging for me isn’t it.”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Take it out,” I whisper into the shell of her ear. “Take it out and show me.”
She reaches between us, unbuttoning my jeans quickly before pushing them to the ground, my boxer briefs right behind them. Instantly her hands wrap around my cock and I can’t help the moan I release against her skin.
“ Fuck ,” I draw out.
She sits back on the desk, tugging her panties down until they are around her ankles, then kicks them to the side. She lifts a foot to wrap around my waist while reaching up around my neck to pull her to me.
Lining my cock up with her entrance, she sucks in a sharp breath, but my movements still.
“Wait.” I pull back. “I don’t have a condom.”
She cups the sides of my face, her thumbs brushing the scruff that lines my jaw. “I want you, Griffin Barlow. I want all of you and nothing between us.”
“Are you sure? I’m safe.”
“I’m on birth control and I’m safe, too. I was tested twice after I found out about…you know, my past,” she says, clearly not wanting to bring that up right now.
“I haven’t been with anyone else in years,” I admit.
Saying it out loud makes it feel that much more real. Blair is the first woman I’ve been with since my ex left town years ago. She’s been the first woman to ignite something inside of me that isn’t gloom or painful memories.
“I want all of you, Blair.”
She pulls me into her again, the tip of my cock grazing her entrance. It's so hard that I don’t even need to use my hands to guide it inside of her. With one thrust I bury myself deep inside of her. Her back arches and she falls back on her elbows.
“Oh my god,” she cries out.
I position myself so I can rest both hands on the sides of her, driving in and out of her. Harder and faster until the only sound around us is the echo of wet skin slapping against each other, mixed with her moans.
“So tight,” I rasp. “The way you stretch around me and take my cock like you own it. You’re so fucking perfect.”
“Griffin,” she moans.
I slow my thrusts, but pound into her harder. “Say my name again, Blair.” Another thrust. “Scream it.”
“Griffin,” she shouts again through labored breaths. “Harder. Fuck me like I’m yours. Only yours.”
I give her one more hard thrust before keeping myself buried inside of her full hilt. I lean forward, grazing her lips with mine, our breaths mixing in the small space between.
“Let me make one thing clear,” I say, my lips grazing against her cheek as they move to her ear. “ I’m yours. You own me.” I grind against her, not pulling out even an inch. Her mouth opens on a sharp inhale, the friction against her clit increasing. “You’ve owned me since the day you moved in, and every single time you got on my nerves after that.”
“Yes,” she moans.
“You have ruined every part of me,” I continue, this time pulling out of her painfully slow until my tip grazes her entrance and then I slam into her again. “And I fully plan to ruin you for anyone else. ”
“Ahhh.” Her moan mixes with a scream of pleasure. “Don’t stop. Ruin me, Griffin. I don’t want anyone else, only you.”
The admission almost knocks me off my feet. Lifting my body up, I grip her sides again to give myself the momentum to fuck her hard. Hard enough that she can’t stop the orgasm about to wash over her.
“Then come for me, sweetheart. Soak my cock with this tight, pretty cunt.”
She bucks her hips into me, matching my steady pace. In seconds, her legs are shaking around me and her pussy pulses around my cock. She feels so good. It catapults me into my own orgasm right behind her.
My abdominal muscles tighten, and I grunt out a string of curse words under my breath because I don’t think I’ve ever come this hard. Not even doing this with Blair before today. I know that these feelings in my chest for her are only making this one more intense.
The words spoken.
How she feels around me.
How it feels being with her.
All of it.
Once our breathing slows down, I pull out of her, looking around the room for something to clean up with. I find a towel hanging from the hook on the wall. Wetting it in the sink from the bathroom connected to the room, I return to help clean her up before cleaning myself up.
After we’re both dressed, we stand there staring at each other. The feelings of words unspoken linger between us and I want to scream it, but something holds me back.
She has to be staying.
I need her to tell me she’s staying before I do.
“Let me just get Storm back in the stall and then we can head out,” I say, breaking the silence before guiding her out of the room and back into the barn. “Are you up for dinner? ”
She hikes a thumb behind her. “After all of that, I’m starving.”
We both laugh as I make my way to get Storm, who’s standing where I left him against the wooden beam. For the next twenty minutes, Blair watches as I get him situated in the stall, brush him, and put his saddle away. She stays there, curious about it all, as if she wants to do it herself one day.
It would have been a perfect time to ask her about her plans.
I tell myself I will ask her over dinner.
Making our way to my truck parked by the ranch entrance, Blair puts her hand in mine. Confirmation I needed to bring up this topic in a little bit when we get back to my place.
“Griffin?” she asks, pulling me to a stop and positioning her body for me to face her. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you. I think now’s a good time for it.”
My nerves spike and I feel the skip of my heart before it goes into overdrive.
She grins as if she can feel the energy radiating off of me. Placing a hand on my chest, I’m sure she can feel the way my heart's thumping. “All good things, Griffin. Take a breath.” She laughs.
I do, letting the corner of my lips twist up, feeling at ease already with her words.
“This thing between us…I want you to know that?—”
Tires screeching along the asphalt have her words falling short, and both of our heads turning in the direction of the main road. An all-black, tinted sports car stops in the middle of the road. The way they stop feels like they are looking for us, but from the looks of the car, it could be someone lost and needing directions.
The car doesn’t move from where it’s stopped, but the front door opens, and I narrow my eyes. The man is in black dress pants and a white button-down dress shirt as if he’s headed to a business meeting.
The grin on his face is mischievous .
“Can I help you, sir?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “You can’t, but she can.”
I turn to face Blair and her face is sheet white. A look of horror written across her features. A stark contrast to the smile she wore moments ago.
She pulls her hand from mine and my eyes bounce between the man and her.
Is this…
No.
The man comes to a stop in front of her, stuffing his hands in his suit pocket. “Hi, babe.”