Chapter 11
Chapter
Eleven
KENDRIX
I couldn’t keep my eyes off this woman. Her loose curls adored the pillow in a way that made me jealous. She took the faux locs out, and I missed her curls. We went upstairs to get ready for bed, and when I tried to kiss her goodnight in the room she had been staying in, she looked at me like I was crazy for suggesting anything other than her staying with me.
Phoenix always kept me on my toes, and I hated it. She should have walked away from me, but Levi and Brian told me that she wouldn’t.
I stared into the faces of my two best friends and mentally prepared myself for our dynamic to change. I kept my voice strong and void of any emotion so that I could recount the details of that horrible night without crying. My feelings about the whole situation were complex; becoming a murderer and having my mother take the fall was not in God’s plan for my life.
“Ken, I wish we were friends back then. I would have helped you kill that piece of shit myself. Right Lee? You have to give Phoenix more credit than that. I’m sure she would have at least heard you out about the situation. You were a kid in a messed-up situation forced to do something that I’m sure you did not want to do.” Brian said, pacing up and down the porch. We have been out here for almost two hours because they kept questioning me.
“That’s right, B, Kendrix, you could have told us what happened. You have been carrying this burden for years since you were a kid. Does anyone else know besides your mother and that social worker?” Levi placed his hand on my shoulder in comfort.
“Grandma Lucy does; that woman knows everything. She told me that she knew when I was around 15 years old and told me if I ever wanted to talk to her about it, I could. I never did, though; all my life, I spent my time wishing it never happened. Fuck but that’s not all though.” I mumbled, tugging on a loose loc.
Brian pushed my shoulder in frustration, “Kendrix you need to stop being so damn secretive. It’s so isolating, and it gives room for the enemy to tell you lies, such as your friends and family will judge you. We are not judging you, get that shit through your thick head. Now say it!”
“Ms. Destiny knows; she came up to the house when I went back home in college to visit Lucy. Phoenix stayed on campus because she was taking a winter course. Destiny barged in on Gran and me talking about it, and she cornered me on the way to the bathroom. I’ll never forget her saying, ‘Don’t you know that you are too tainted for my daughter. She deserves more than what you can ever give her.
“I knew there was something off about you; now I know what it is. How could you possibly kill your father and then expect to live life as normal with my mother and daughter in here? The first thing I should do is call the police, but I won’t if you stay away from her. Don’t look at her, don’t talk to her, stop breathing the same air as her. Trust me, I will find out if you do, and you’ll be sitting in a jail cell like your mother!’.
“I kept my distance and tried to stay away from Phoenix until my mother’s sentence was up. Then things got out of hand, and now, with this stalker on the loose, I need to keep her in my home until we figure out who this person is. All I ever wanted was to protect the women I love; all of this extra shit came along with it. I wanted Phoenix from the minute she placed her hand in mine; all my life, I was the selfless kid, became the obedient child my mother needed to survive, and I didn’t question her authority either.
“My wants and needs were nonexistent for the most part, and from what I can remember, Phoenix Diamond is the first thing I wanted in a very, very long time. I’ll be damned if I let her mother tear the roots up before it can really blossom, so I played my cards right. She wanted me to stay away from Phoenix, and I did that to the naked eye, but my heart has been in her pocket. I watched from the sidelines and did my best to protect her from everything that tried to hurt her, her own mother included. My visits to Just Expresso almost five times a week were to quench my soul's thirst without her.
“Brian, you asked me to take care of her when you went off to the military, and though it did not seem that way, I promise I did in more ways than one. I’ll die if something happens to that woman in there; both of you know what that feels like.” I coughed to disrupt the emotion in my voice; my heart was crumpling at the thought.
Brian shook his head by the time I was finished. “I don’t know what’s wrong with her. She wasn’t always this trifling, was she?” I smirked and nodded at him. He was one of the people she liked, so she treated him differently.
“We will make sure nothing affects your mother getting out of prison. Is this why you didn’t want me to look into her case?” I nodded officially at my emotional cap for tonight.
Levi pulled me into him for a hug, and his big brother energy made it easier to express how I felt to my friends… my brothers.
“We will get this shit figured out together,” Brian said, joining our group hug.
“Together.” Levi and I echoed .
“Why are you still awake?” Her sleepy tone was sexy as hell; I mean, everything she did was sexy to me. I turned the bedside lamp on so I could stare at her face even though I had every freckle of hers memorized—25 freckles she inherited from her mother. I hated the woman, but she birthed the bravest, kindest, and best part of my world. That was all God, though. He knew I needed my jewel to bring some relief into my life.
“I can’t stop thinking about the fact that you are here right now. Why are you still here right now?” I grabbed her hand and brought it to my mouth. Holding her in any way made me feel pure as if it crystallized off her and latched onto me, making me a bit more fitting for her.
“Do you want me to go?” Her eyes were closed, and I cuffed her chin so she could remind me why I called her jewel in the first place.
“Absolutely not; you didn’t even flinch when I told you. You didn’t ask for time to think about it or anything. You took my story and left it at that, and my brain is trying to understand, but I’m falling short.” The abandonment issues I’ve always had and been recently talking to a therapist about sprung up and laid on the bed with us.
Phoenix’s eyelashes fluttered when she opened her eyes. She always stared into my soul, and it was strange how she was the only woman outside of my mother who really saw me. The kindness of her spirit didn’t allow her to be put off by my standoffish behavior, the selfish moments when I told her I loved her but couldn’t be with her. She stuck with me.
“You had your mother ripped away from you and your dad was a piece of shit. The day you ended up on Gran’s steps told me you were just like the rest of us; you needed love and family. I could never quite put you in the family category; it always felt like more because that’s what we were meant to be. I will not give up on you, Kendrix Morgan. I see the man God created you to be, and I’d be stupid to walk away from you. You think I don’t have abandonment issues either, my parents dropped me off at Gran’s and only came to visit maybe three times every three years.
“We are the same person; I cling to love, and it’s hard for me to let go, even if it means I allow people to hurt me. You did the opposite; you held those you love at a distance because you didn’t want them to see the real you and hurt you. What we look for in other people, we have found in each other, so is that everything you’ve been hiding from me?” How does she expect me to talk after revealing everything I have been feeling? I have been looking for family and love all of this time when I should have been sharing more with the family I got the moment I met Grandma Lucy and Pop Brian .
I told her everything, from the problems at my job to my side business of helping the ladies in The UnKept Woman Inc. There were certain things I couldn’t disclose due to the job, and I would never put her in a position to be hurt because of something I told her.
“Wow, you can never catch a break, can you?” She sat up from her position on my chest and then climbed up to straddle me. My jewel is so damn beautiful I swear it drives me crazy.
“I do whenever I’m with you, I told you, Jewel. You are my peace. Now that I know you aren’t going anywhere and I’m not going anywhere, can we go back to that conversation from some time ago?” I placed one hand in her hair to draw her face closer to mine. Her soft hands were on my bare chest, sending a charged energy through me.
“What conversation?” Her voice turned husky when I slowly started to rock back and forth, pushing my hardness into her heat. It felt wrong to be with her in that one way before when I was still holding on to secrets; I couldn’t be with her knowing that she didn’t know everything and still had the choice to walk away from me after she found out.
I kissed the delicate flesh of her collarbone, taking my time to show her the attention she deserved. Phoenix drew her head back, extending her neck to give me more access. My lips, teeth, and tongue created a nice pattern of kisses all the way up to her earlobe.
“That feels really good, Ken.” I sped up to thrust my body into her, faster and faster because I could smell her arousal and that shit was making me wild.
“How good, baby?” I groaned in her ear. Pulling back slightly to look at her flushed cheeks and closed eyes she was gorgeous like this. The nightgown she wore was a sheer pink, and her brown nipples and large areolas made my mouth water.
“Fuck Ken, you’re not even inside me yet and I’m already losing my mind.” She lazily opened her eyes when I pulled the gown over her head to expose her beautiful body to me. Phoenix looked so innocent every time she smiled, but when she was naked, she became a seductress. The roundness of her breast bounced up and down, hypnotizing me; I licked all around it, not hitting the area I wanted to prolong her awaiting orgasm.
“Phoenix, you don’t even know how beautiful you are to me; even with all of the degrees and education, I know I still don’t have enough words to tell you.” I sang her praises and pulled her left nipple into my mouth sucking on it so hard I heard her yelp. The wetness through her pantyless gown was seeping into my boxers.
“I’m so close…” She cried, and I rolled her nipples harder and thrust in an upward motion to hit every po int I could. My mouth never stopped moving from her breast, not after she came so hard it gushed onto my stomach, not after she begged me to stop. I kept thrusting into her now spent body until I felt her body sag, and the twitching stopped.
I looked at her, barely holding her eyes open, and her hair was clinging to her forehead.
“Listen, Jewel, you’re my woman now, okay? This back-and-forth thing between us is over. I’m about to make up for all those times here and now. We got five years’ worth of lovemaking to catch up on, so I’m giving you a few minutes to get your bearings together, and then you won’t be leaving this bed for the next 48 hours.” She looked at me with her mouth agape, and I smirked at her.
“It’s nothing to talk about, Jewel. Close your mouth. It’s not time for it to be too full yet.” I kissed her mouth briefly and lifted her off me so I could check the cameras and triple-check the alarms.
PHOENIX
A whole twenty minutes passed, and my mind was still blown from the first orgasm, and I was a little nervous about this. Kendrix and I hadn’t had sex since we were in college when we took each other’s virginities, and it was the sweetest thing. That young man that he was before had grown into a man that left out of the room with that dangerous drug in the middle of his legs.
I quickly pulled out my phone, and it was almost 2:00 in the morning, but I had to text my girls.
Me
Listen, I’m about to have sex with Ken, and he told me he’s holding me hostage for days, so please say a little prayer for me and drop off some food for us because I promise I’m not letting up off of this man… my man. He told me that we were together, and he was lucky that I was post-orgasm and my hearing was coming from my eye because I wanted a proper girlfriend proposal. I know one of yall are awake… Asha, you’re like a vampire.
Asha
Yes, girl, I am awake, lol, and praise him! We have been waiting for this day since forever! Nix, you better put it on him so good that 48 hours turns into 72 hours. You know Kay Kay is most likely having her own fun right now Brian can’t keep his hands off her.
Makayla
I am not. Unfortunately, yall Goddaughter is cock-blocking right now because she woke up right before it got good. Have fun, and I’ll drop you off some food soonish. Don’t be like me, a woman who can never tell her man no because I’m too far gone off him. It’s like a drug.
Me
Hahaha, I miss you guys.. Promise we’ll FaceTime soon and see each other.
Makayla
Promise, and I love you too.
Asha
Love you for life, sisters, I promise too.
I got up to light some candles and turn on some music; I wanted this to be special, even better than the last time we were together.
“Here, drink this and eat some of the food for me.” Kendrix was light on his feet to be such a big man. I didn’t even hear him come back in the room; he placed a plate of fruits and nuts on the nightstand table. He must have cleaned up a bit because he was now naked as the day he was born, like me. I tried not to stare, but who was I kidding ?
The brown veiny muscle stood at attention, and I crossed my legs to tame the heat from my core. It matched the beautiful man trotting it around. Kendrix looked at me and smiled a sexy grin.
I grabbed a piece of orange and a few cashews, “how are you just gonna manhandle me into a relationship with you, Kendrix? I deserve more than a sex-hazed proposal, and you know it.” He sat across from me on the bed, eating and drinking a blue Gatorade.
His eyes twinkled at me when he came closer to feed me the food I could have very easily fed myself. Damn, I sounded like Makayla now.
“I know what you deserve, Phoenix; I wanted us to come to a clear understanding that this progression in our relationship was leading us to where we should be, together. The gasps and moans that you will cry for me won’t be because of some sex arrangement; it’s because you're my woman, and I owe you long strokes and an endless number of orgasms. I was buying my time agreeing to that until my mom came home, and there was nothing your mother could hold over my head anymore. She’s coming home pretty soon, around my birthday, which would have been the time for me to have both girls with me. You know I will give you anything and everything you deserve.
“You don’t know this, but I paid for your tuition at that fancy culinary school you went to straight out of college. I asked Grandma Lucy if I could pay for it and she let me. Do you remember I was staying in that shitty apartment that barely kept the heat working in the winter? I sent my money from the first few years working for the agency to Slatesville Culinary Collectives Academy; I overheard you telling her that you couldn’t afford it, so I made it happen. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Phoenix. I’m not telling you this for extra brownie points; I want you to understand the gravity of my love for you. It might not have been plain to see on the outside, but I have always felt it right here and right here.” He pointed to his heart and the mouth-watering muscle that I was doing an excellent job at ignoring, for the most part, during his admission.
I was devastated when I graduated from SSU and got the acceptance letter to SCCA, but once my aid didn’t cover it all, I thought I would have to ask my Grandmother to pay for it. For some odd reason, I wanted to avoid doing that because I felt like Gran was going through a lot with all the changes at that time. Pops was gone, and Brian was in the military, and I didn’t want to benefit from nepotism, but that was stupid. There was no reason I should have felt guilty for benefiting from the opportunities that became more accessible to me because of my family. Knowing that Kendrix was why I got in had me ready to burst at the seams for him. In my head, this man didn’t care about me; he avoided me after returning from Jamaica to see Gran that winter, and I never really got an explanation. After I finally tracked him down in his dorm room two weeks later, he said he wanted to be friends and was sorry for leading me on.
Once I take the time to enjoy this new thing between us, my mother and I will have a few words.
“Wow, I didn’t know that; I want to thank you,” I said, putting my plate down, walking over to the side of the bed he was on, and dropping to my knees before him.
“Jewel, you've got two seconds to get up. I’m hanging on by a thread right now.” I ignored him and placed my hands on his thighs. I bit my bottom lip and tried to think about where I wanted to start. I hadn't done this much before, but I wanted to impress. I am a pillow princess, but Kendrix was different.
“Baby get—” I cut him off by licking the head and sucking the precum that tried to slide down his shaft. Kendrix groaned loudly, and I wanted to smile, but I was preoccupied with making him fall apart. It was my time to moan when he grabbed my hair in that blissful way that brought shocks of pain and pleasure from the top of my head to my tingling body.
Omarion singing “In The Dark” brought so many memories about us being two kids experimenting with one another. I used one hand to massage his balls and created a nice flow that had Kendrix cursing and praising me at the time.
“Baby fuck!” This moan was louder than the rest, so I went faster, ignoring the painful way my knees wanted to buckle. Kendrix chased his orgasm, and I let him take what he needed from me to give him the utmost release.
He roared, and I cleaned him up nicely, not leaving one drop. Kendrix pulled out and shook his head at me. “You are dangerous; you don’t have to pull out your best skills, Jewel. I’m already in love with you. I will already kill for you, what more do you want from me? You want this house, a car, everything in my bank account. tell me, baby, and it’s yours.” I laughed so hard that I almost fell while trying to get up off the floor.
Kendrix didn’t join me; he was serious. I climbed onto his lap, and he laid back and brought my lips to his. He licked into my mouth, and I felt his fingers enter my core; each curve of his tongue mimicked the way his fingers brought me to my second release of the night.
“Sit on my face.” He didn’t have to tell me twice. I didn’t care that I could suffocate him, especially when he held my thighs in place. I closed my eyes and rode his skillful mouth; he dipped his tongue in and out of me, bringing me wave after wave of every good thing in my life. Kendrix did everything to the best of his ability, even me. I rolled my nipples with both hands, and it only added to all the work Kendrix was putting in; this man knew my body. It doesn’t matter how much time was spent apart; he would deliver like this, and it would be the last time.
“Kendrix, I-I, yes, yes, yes!” I screamed out, unable to finish my sentence; his thumb somehow made its way to my back door and took me over the top. I tried to move off of him because the feeling of everything was making my body overload into the dangerous category of offering this man a baby. Kendrix lightly slapped my thigh, and I felt more essence falling straight into his awaiting mouth.
He dragged my body down so I could see his face through my half-open lids, and he placed kisses all over my neck, and my body was still twitching.
“You are so responsive, mama. Are you okay?” He sounded concerned, and I tried to offer him a smile, but it took too much energy that I didn’t have. Kendrix wrapped his arms around me, and I wanted to wrap around him koala bear style. He massaged my neck and shoulders, eliciting more moans from me. I kissed the part of his body my lips contacted from the way he was holding me. Kendrix’s hand kneaded my butt, he spread me wide and brought his hands up under to touch my core. Rubbing my nipples across his hard chest created a nice buzz that had me ready to keep going into the night like he promised.
“Look at me, baby,” Kendrix commanded. I looked up at him and smiled at the way his heart started beating when our eyes connected.
“I love you so much, Phoenix Diamond McClain; you are the woman for me. I have never wanted any person the way I want you. There should be no doubt about my feelings for you; I will do right by you. I promise to protect your heart and never lie to you again. It killed me not to tell you the truth, but I wanted you to have the relationship you wanted with your mother, and I thought I was doing the right thing. Now I know that was wrong; you will be the mother to my kids if we decide to go that way. This is us, baby, the quiet and the storm, the loud and the reserved. Our love doesn’t have to be understood by others as long as we get it. I have you, which is enough for me; I’m holding you this close for the rest of my life, right here in my heart.” I didn’t bother to wipe the tears that fell on his chest because it was pointless; more would fall.
“I know, I gave you my heart, and I have nothing else to surrender to you. I surrender everything: my pride, heart, and secrets. Are you ready, love? I need you. My body is buzzing.”
I huffed out a laugh, “I love you too, baby; I trust you to allow me to be what you have always been for me and others. You already let me in your heart, and that’s all I ever wanted.” I kissed the place right above his heart .
I used my feet to position myself right above him and took my time to lower myself inch by inch. Kendrix rolled my nipple in his hand, and I felt so full, simulated, and my whole body was on fire.
“Jewel, baby, open your eyes and look at me.” His husky voice added to the equation. I slowly rode him to the beat of “Every Type Of Way” by H.E.R. My playlist was playing all the right songs. Kendrix was biting his bottom lip and matching me stroke for stroke. The sounds our bodies made were louder than the music now.
“I missed this Ken baby, being with you having you fill me up like this.” I could feel him expanding in me; I didn’t forget how much he enjoyed dirty talk. I remembered everything about him.
“Don’t start that shit Jewel, I owe you four more orgasms so keep it up and we can put something in that pretty mouth of yours to keep it closed.” Kendrix sucked my nipple in his mouth and played with my sensitive bud at the same time, how in the world he was hitting all of my spots I had no idea.
“Baby--- please go faster!” I needed it all; I needed him to keep loving me with his words and body.
“Je—jewel, I can deliver whatever you need!” He clenched through his teeth. I squeezed him with each rise and fall of our lovemaking. I cried out when he lifted me up and down, bringing me full force into my fourth one of the night .
I came so hard no words came out of my mouth; I was speechless. Kendrix flipped us over and pushed my ankles to my ears with no care that I was still shaking and could see stars. Kendrix hammered into me, “Jewel I don’t know why I was staying away from this good pussy for so long. I didn’t mean it, baby; Jazmine wrote that song about you. You have the BPW award; I promise I will not let another man have what you give to me so freely. I won’t take this for granted.” Kendrix had his hand wrapped in my hair so tight I’m sure my scalp was pulsating with every part of my body. How he managed to talk and deliver merciless deep-rooted strokes was beyond me.
“Baby, I love you. Tell me you love me back.” He lost control, and I fell into bliss right along with him.
“I love you too,” I said, closing my eyes and resting until he fulfilled his promise.