Chapter 7
My alarm wakes me the next morning. I reach over to my desk, fumbling around until I touch my phone, hitting the stop button.
With a groan, I roll onto my back, stretching my tense muscles.
I slept on and off during the night with a few short nightmares surfacing.
At least they were imaginary instead of actual events.
Unfortunately, they all revolved around new living situations, which doesn’t help my nervousness.
My belly is queasy already, and I just woke up.
Thank goodness I requested a morning call. I can’t imagine waiting all day.
Sue knocks and peeks her head into my room. “Hi sweetheart, checking if you’re up. Shall I make some breakfast while you get ready?”
“Sue, I don’t think I’ll be able to eat this morning. I’m already nervous and queasy.”
“I’ll make you some mint tea. How does that sound?”
“Sounds good. Thank you. I’ll be down after I shower.”
“Okay, I’ll get your tea ready. I’ve got blueberry muffins in the oven right now. I’ll set some aside for you for later.” She waves and leaves.
I get up and walk to my closet. Despite the house being warm, I feel chilly this morning. What does one wear to meet their father? I have absolutely no idea, so I grab a tank top and jeans for now, and head to the shower.
I’m still standing in front of my closet 30 minutes later when Sue comes back in. “Okay, sweetheart?”
“I can’t decide if I should dress up or wear my usual tee and hoodie, Sue.” I’ve looked at everything hanging up twice but I’m still undecided, and still feel cold, with waves of pins and needles running down the length of my body at random times. Nervous energy, I guess.
“You wear whatever is comfortable to you right now. Zander won’t care what you’re wearing,” she assures me.
I take another quick scan, then grab Jake’s hoodie to pull over my tank top. I want a part of him with me when I meet Zander. It seems only right.
“Good choice. Come,” she motions, “let’s go down and have tea.”
We head down to the kitchen table where my mug of tea is waiting for me. I take a deep breath of the refreshing, minty smell and sip as Sue fills a tray with hot tea and muffins.
“We should have the call in the living room this morning. Mary can set her laptop on the coffee table, and the three of us can sit along the couch. It should allow all of us to be seen on screen. How does that sound, sweetheart?”
“That sounds good, Sue.” The mint is helping the nauseous feeling, but my palms are getting sweaty. I bring my half-empty cup to the sink to drain, as a knock sounds on the door. I open the door to find Mary. “Hi Mary. Come in. Sue has us setting up in the living room.”
“Hi Summer. How are you doing?” Mary is in a puffer coat, opened to show a rumpled grey business suit, with her purse in one hand and a laptop bag in the other.
“I’m hanging in there,” I reply.
Sue greets Mary and helps her set up on the coffee table as I stand in front of the sink and wash my mug for something to do. My phone rings in my hoodie pocket. Pulling it out, I see Sarah video calling. “Hi Sarah. Is everything all right?”
“Hi Summer. Everything is fine. Just checking in before our call.”
“Oh, okay. I’m really nervous. I was nauseous when I woke up, and I’m fidgeting now, and my palms are sweaty.”
“That’s expected, Summer. This is a big step. Perfectly normal response. Were you able to read through the letter and attachments Zander sent?”
“Yeah, Sue and I both did.” The pile of papers from him is sitting on my desk. It’s as thick as a notebook, making me feel a little more at ease with all the effort he put in.
“What are your thoughts about Zander after reading everything?” Sarah inquires.
“He seems nice. Zander wants you all to stay in my life, and he wants to meet everyone when I’m ready. He said he was nervous too.”
“That’s great, Summer. It sounds as though he already cares about you. Are you ready to meet him?”
Not even a little, I think to myself. “I kinda have to be, right?” I don’t have a choice but to meet him and move. Upending my whole life again, no big deal, right? I internally roll my eyes at myself.
She smiles kindly. “Remember, one moment at a time. I’m going to hang up now, so I’m ready when Mary calls. I’ll see you in a few minutes.”
“Okay, bye, Sarah.” I walk into the living room, tucking my phone back into my pocket, and see Mary working on the laptop, set up in the center of the coffee table.
Mary stands up and turns towards me after finishing, her usual pinched look on her face. “Summer, were you able to read my email?”
“Yes, I read it last night.”
She quirks an eyebrow at me, waiting. So self-righteous, this one.
I look over at Sue, who nods. “Everything is fine, Mary. Let’s move on.” Mary and I have had a bumpy relationship from the beginning. She cares about the kids under her care, I think, in her own way, but she doesn’t have the empathy gene. I often wondered how she ended up at CPS.
“Okay,” Sue claps her hands. “Shall we take a seat on the couch? It’s a few minutes until nine.”
Sue sits and pats the seat between her and Mary for me. Mary bends over and brings up Sarah’s info and dials her in first.
I wave as Sue and Mary greet her. At that moment, the laptop rings.
I suck in a breath, and Sue grabs my hand.
Sarah gives me a smile and a nod. Oh, gosh, this is it.
Can I do this? I don’t know if I can. But I have to.
My ears ring from my rapid heartbeat as I breathe deeply to try and remain calm.
Mary looks at us and presses the accept button. Zander’s face pops up on a split screen with Sarah. He locks onto me, a smile breaking across his face as tears gather in his eyes. “Summer,” he whispers. “You’re so beautiful.”
Sue squeezes my hand as I breathe out slowly and stare at my father for the first time. He looks just like his picture. It’s surreal to comprehend that this man is half of me. I never gave much thought to who my father was growing up. Now he’s smiling at me in wonder.
I must have zoned out for a minute because Sarah calls out to me. “Summer, breathe for me.”
I gaze over at her and let go of the breath I was unconsciously holding. “Sorry.” I duck my head in embarrassment. Great first impression, Summer.
“I’m glad I’m not the only nervous one here,” Zander laughs. His voice is crisp and mild.
When I look up, I see the same crinkles around his eyes as in his picture, and he’s wiping tears from his cheeks. “I’m so happy to meet you, Summer. Thank you for letting me video call you this morning.”
“It’s nice to meet you too,” I manage to get out. This is an out-of-body experience. My heart is booming like thunder in my chest, and an involuntary tremble comes over my cold body. Despite my clammy hand, Sue is still holding strong.
“Would you introduce me to everyone?” Zander asks, which I nearly miss.
“Of course, sure. Sorry,” I stumble. “I’m a bit overwhelmed.” I lean my body towards Sue first. “This is Sue, who I live with.”
“It’s lovely to meet you, Zander.” Sue gives him a bright smile.
“Likewise, Miss Sue. Thank you for taking in and caring for Summer.” There’s sincerity in his voice as he replies to her.
“Sarah is the woman on the screen with you and my therapist,” I point out next.
“Hello Zander. Nice to meet you,” Sarah replies, very businesslike. Her voice is always kind, but there’s more of a detached nuisance to it. Not cool, like when she speaks to Mary, but it’s different from how she interacts with Sue and me.
“Hi Sarah. I’m happy to meet you,” Zander gives her a big wave.
“And this is Mary, my caseworker.” I point to my right.
“Nice to put a face to the name, Mary.” Zander sounds similar to Sarah’s with her. Huh, seems Mary leaves the same impression on us all.
“Nice to see you as well, Zander. This initial contact is simply a meet and greet. There are no set rules here. It’s just a chance for everyone to communicate.”
We all look around at each other as Zander chuckles, “awkward.”
I can’t help but smile a little; some nerves easing at his easygoing manner. Sue and Sarah laugh with him.
“Okay, I’ll start,” Zander offers, rubbing his hands together. “Summer, did you have time to review everything I sent you?”
“I did with Sue last night. Thank you for sending all the info.”
He scrunches up his nose. “Was it too much? I got a little overexcited when I got your list.”
I shake my head. “No, it wasn’t. I have a lot to learn about you.”
“Okay good. I have a tendency to go a little overboard sometimes, or so I’ve been told.” He puts his hand beside his mouth, pretending to tell a secret.
Sue laughs at him. Zander is a bit of a goofball, I think.
“So, do you have questions for me, Summer? Or Sue? Sarah?” he asks.
There’s one big question I need him to reaffirm for me, so I speak up before anyone else can. “Were you serious when you said I could come back and visit whenever I want?”
“Absolutely, I was. As often as you can. Remember, I’m a pilot. That makes traveling easier,” he winks.
“You’re getting precious cargo here, Zander. But I have a sense you are already aware of that,” Sue comments, giving him her serious face.
“I certainly am, Sue. And I hope you know I expect you to come visit as often as you can. I’ve got a guest room with your name on it.”
“Thank you. I appreciate that, Zander,” Sue replies with a nod and a squeeze of my hand.
“And Summer and I will continue our sessions as she needs them,” Sarah pipes in.
“Of course. Whatever Summer needs, Sarah. Where are you located? Is there anything we need to arrange for that?”
“No setup needed. We’ve always done video sessions as I’m in Savannah.”
“No kidding! I’m near Charleston. Looks like you’ll be even closer to Sarah soon, Summer,” Zander says with another smile.
“What information do you have about Summer’s situation, Zander?” Sarah asks him.
He narrows his eyes, thinking. “Not much. There was an accident where she lost her family. I was so sorry to hear about that, Summer.” You can see genuine sorrow in his eyes. “She’s being fostered by Sue, but I’m unaware of the extenuating circumstances.”
“I see. Perhaps we should have a separate discussion surrounding the extenuating circumstances before we get much farther along,” Sarah suggests as she stares at Mary.
“Yes, well,” Mary bristles, “I haven’t had a discussion with Summer about that yet. We didn’t address it on Thursday as planned,” Mary mentions. “Summer, we can discuss that now…”
“That is a private conversation, Mary. Not for all of us to hear at this time,” Sarah quickly interrupts.
Zander looks between all of us with concern.
“I’m not sure what I’m witnessing right now, but I certainly don’t want Summer to be uncomfortable.
Her business is her own. Summer, it doesn’t matter to me what circumstances you have.
I’m excited for you to come here and live with me.
Whatever we need to figure out to suit you, we will.
I’ll move heaven and earth to make sure you’re happy,” he says seriously.
“Thank you, Zander. That means more than you realize.” I hope he feels the same after he knows everything. The thought flits through my mind quickly as I try to pay attention to the conversation.
“Perhaps this is a good breaking point?” Sarah questions.
I nod as Sue and Zander agree. “Sue, Sarah, Mary, it was lovely to officially meet you all.” Zander begins. “Summer, I can’t wait to talk more with you. Mary will give you my number. Use it as often as you wish and please keep me informed as much as you’re comfortable, okay?”
“I will,” I nod.
“Okay, goodbye for now, all,” Zander smiles and waves before disappearing off the screen.
I take a few deep breaths as Sue squeezes the hand she’s still holding, and turns toward Mary. “What did we not cover on Thursday?”
“It seems we should talk in private?” Mary answers in an unpleasant tone of voice.
“No, Sue and Sarah can both stay.”
“As you read in my email, the background check on Mr. Finn came back fine. His home inspection is tomorrow morning. Since he is a blood relative, there’s really nothing else required.
Assuming that passes, I need to inform him about your circumstances so that he is aware of what he will deal with by moving you into his home. ”
I tense. That doesn’t sound ominous at all. “What do you mean, deal with?”
“Well, a copy of your CPS file is emailed to him for review, which includes medical reports and information on your foster placements. A summary of each placement and any behavioral issues are noted. The reported assault is included. Your performance in school will also be in there. I will give him my assessment as well.”
I look over at Sue and Sarah. My fears about his response to my file comes to the surface.
I’m sure Sue can see the emotion written all over my face.
She puts her arm around me to give me a side hug.
“It’ll be okay, sweetheart. He’s already smitten with you.
Nothing in that file will matter to him. I promise.”
“I agree, Summer. While Mary could have been more tactful, it is customary for new homes to be informed of relevant information to provide optimal support. I don’t foresee any issues with Zander regarding this,” she reassures.
“One more thing,” Mary says. “Since the week after next is spring break here, CPS believes the best time to move you to South Carolina is this coming weekend.” After that abrupt announcement, she quickly packs up her laptop and writes a phone number on a slip of paper, leaving it on the coffee table.
I close my eyes and try to breathe. Less than a week until I move to a brand new state with a man I haven’t met in person.
“Come on, let’s go to the kitchen and have muffins and tea.” Sue wraps her arm around my shoulder and guides me to the kitchen table. She brews some fresh tea and brings two mugs and a plate of muffins over to me. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m processing Sue. I can’t believe we have less than a week left.” It’s too soon. It’s too soon, keeps rolling through my thoughts.
“I know, but we knew this would happen quickly. Besides, it looks like I have my own room waiting for me in South Carolina.” She’s trying to lighten the mood for me, which I adore.
“Yeah, he really seems determined to keep everyone I need in my life, doesn’t he?”
“You’ve got a good one there.” Sue takes a sip of her tea before encouraging me to do the same.
“Yeah, I might Sue. I need to distract myself for the rest of the day.” The hot mint tea actually helps to warm my body up a bit.
“Then let’s distract you. Lunch out followed by baking and Gilmore Girls.”