Coda
She sat at the head of the bed, her back against the headboard, her legs drawn to her chest, her arms wrapped around them.
‘Is something wrong?’ she asked softly.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said disconsolately. ‘I don’t seem to be able to manage it.’
‘Is there something I could—’
‘It’s not you, Sparks,’ he said. ‘You are perfection.’
‘Hardly.’
‘Remember the night when we escaped the anti-fascist rally?’
‘Vividly. Our first kiss. And our second.’
‘Do you remember me telling you that I was in an experimental phase?’
‘I do.’
‘Well, this is the experiment,’ he said, looking away from her. ‘Hypothesis: Tony Danforth is not homosexual. Experiment: Tony will make love to the most desirable woman he has ever known. Result: abject failure. Conclusion: Tony Danforth is homosexual. I’m sorry to be such a disappointment.’
She crawled across the bed to hold him.
‘You are not a disappointment,’ she whispered. ‘You will never be one. You are my dear friend, and always will be. I’m so glad you’ve finally told me.’
‘You suspected?’
‘It’s taken this long to get you into bed with me,’ she said, leaning her head on his shoulder. ‘I wondered if that was the case. It’s good that you didn’t force yourself to go through with it. It would have only made things worse later. Do Kevin and Bruce know?’
‘They’ve been making snide comments,’ he said. ‘Dropping nasty little hints about my failures with women. Those eased off when you came into my life. There were quite a few speculations as to what would take place between us this weekend.’
‘But they don’t know.’
‘They would cut me off completely if they did,’ he said. ‘It would get out around the entire university and dash to pieces all of my hopes to join the Foreign Office. Hell, to have a career in anything worthwhile in this country. My desires are prosecutable.’
‘Listen to me, Tony,’ she said, turning him to face her.
‘You are worthwhile, much more so than this wretched, backwards country we are forced to live in. So I promise you this: your secret will always be safe with me, no matter what. And you are going to spend the rest of the night in my bed, and we will emerge for breakfast looking exhausted but triumphant. If the others ask, I will blush becomingly and you will be reticent but quietly proud.’
‘You would do that for me?’ he asked. ‘Risk your reputation for me?’
‘Do you know my reputation?’ she said, laughing. ‘One more conquest for Iris Sparks will raise very few eyebrows. Now, put those pyjamas back on and let’s get some sleep. Oh, one more thing.’
‘What’s that?’ he asked.
She reached up and ruffled his hair vigorously for a few seconds, then sat back and admired her handiwork.
‘Now, you do mine,’ she said.
He reached forwards and gently tousled her hair, then held her head gently with both hands and kissed her.
‘I am forever yours,’ he said.
‘Likewise,’ she said. ‘Come, we can still cuddle under the covers without sabotaging the experiment.’
He put his pyjamas back on, slid under the bedclothes, and embraced her. They fell asleep and stayed in that position.
Until the screaming began.
East Grinstead, 1947
When they had stabilised him enough they transported him by ambulance to the specialised burn facility.
His regular nurse rode in the back with him, maintaining the morphine drip when each jolt caused him to gasp in pain.
Once there, she kissed him on the cheek and whispered, ‘God save you,’ then took the train back to London, crying all the way.
There came a series of debridings and skin grafts, each requiring its own recovery period. The days became a blur, and he spent much of his time asleep. Then one morning, he woke to see a familiar pair of eyes inches from his.
‘Sparks?’ he said. ‘Am I dreaming?’
‘You dreaming of me would be extremely flattering, given everything,’ she said.
She was sitting next to his bed, leaning with her forearms folded on the edge, her chin resting on top so she would be face to face with him.
‘How extraordinary of you to come all this way,’ he said.
‘It’s not that long a trip,’ she said. ‘And I have three questions for you.’
‘All this way for three questions,’ he said. ‘I feel like an oracle. Ask and be enlightened.’
‘Why did you kiss me outside the Barley Mow that night?’ she asked.
‘I’m sorry about that,’ he said.
‘I asked you why, not to apologise.’
‘I spotted a man following me,’ he said reluctantly.
‘I’ve been fearful ever since I came back that the Foreign Office would discover my preferences, and I thought they had sent someone to catch me in pursuit of them.
I thought maybe a brazen display of blatant heterosexuality would appease them.
I’m sorry my paranoia led to your discomfort. ’
She looked at him for a long time. He couldn’t read her expression. Then she nodded.
‘You weren’t being paranoid,’ she said. ‘But you were wrong about the reason you were being followed. Did Parham tell you why you were attacked?’
‘Not in detail,’ said Tony. ‘Just that it was a man who had dated Evelyn before me. I assumed that it was out of some insane level of jealousy.’
‘That was part of it,’ said Sparks. ‘There’s more.’
‘How is it that you know this?’
‘Forster wrote something pretentious before the war that nevertheless has stuck with me,’ she said. ‘That if he had to choose between betraying a friend and betraying his country, he hoped he would be strong enough to save his friend.’
‘I don’t want you to commit treason on my behalf, Sparks,’ he said softly.
‘That isn’t the problem,’ she said. ‘The problem is what to do when you also believe said friend is also a betrayer. Which leads to my second question: what did Sauce tell you when you drove her from the Pickard mansion to the train station?’
He was silent.
‘Did she tell you that Bruce had raped her?’ she continued. ‘That he did it repeatedly while Kevin held her down, and that your two close friends then traded places? That this was all happening while you and I slept unawares in Kevin’s sister’s bed?’
‘Iris, please,’ he whispered.
‘I think she told you,’ said Sparks. ‘Because I asked you when you got back what she had said, and you refused to answer. Which means that instead of helping her, instead of helping a woman who had been brutally victimised by your two dear friends, you took their side instead.’
‘So did you,’ he said.
‘No, I took no position,’ she said. ‘I didn’t have the know-ledge of what she said happened.
I asked her after the weekend, but she shut herself down.
I’m not saying I came out of this clean.
I should have trusted my suspicions. But you made your choice based on much more information than I had. Why?’
‘Because they were my friends, and she wasn’t,’ he said.
‘I couldn’t let them go to jail. I had no idea Sauce would kill herself.
Then when Bruce spiralled down afterwards I offered him a grand soul-cleansing adventure, which ended up killing him.
I’ve lived with that guilt ever since. Guilt over them both. ’
‘She was my friend, Tony,’ said Sparks. ‘So were you. You should have told me.’
‘Were?’ he said, his voice breaking. ‘Is this your judgement upon me?’
‘You’ve already been punished,’ she said. ‘And here is where I betray my country. I was an inadvertent instrumentality of that punishment.’
‘How so?’
‘You were being followed because you were suspected of being a communist double-agent,’ she said. ‘Whether for Uncle Joe or Chairman Mao, I don’t know. I was asked to set you up with a British agent who would find out if it was true.’
‘Evelyn Lowle?’ he said. ‘She works for the government?’
‘Yes,’ said Sparks. ‘Only it turned out there was much more to her than that. How well did you know Bruce’s family?’
‘I met him and Kevin when I started at Cambridge,’ he said. ‘I only met his parents when they came to visit, which was infrequent. Why?’
‘He had a little sister, Charlotte,’ said Sparks. ‘She’s Evelyn Lowle. She was the one who got Lonsdale to attack you. No one knew she was planning this.’
‘My God,’ he said. ‘But she wasn’t charged with any of it.’
‘Nor will she be,’ said Sparks. ‘Everything has been hushed up. Lonsdale will plead guilty and serve his sentence. She will continue on in another place under another name.’
‘What about me?’ he asked.
‘They still suspect you,’ she said. ‘I imagine they always will. It may be true, for all I know. All I can say is if you are working for the other side, give it up now, Tony.’
‘I suppose you’re done with me, then,’ he said bitterly.
‘Almost,’ she said.
‘That’s right. There’s a third question to be asked. I dread hearing it.’
‘This one is less painful,’ she said. ‘Our first date at the Whim. You were planning to take me to a film, but we got caught up in talking for the entire day. Do you remember?’
‘I remember. What’s the question?’
‘Which film were you going to take me to?’
‘The Night Is Young.’
‘Why that one?’
He smiled, closing his eyes and remembering.
‘Because Ramon Novarro was gorgeous,’ he said.
‘He was, wasn’t he?’ she agreed. ‘Fine. No more questions. There’s one last thing.’
‘Which is what?’
‘You’re still a client of The Right Sort,’ she said.
‘I will withdraw my application—’
‘We have a match for you.’
‘What?’
‘Her name is Virginia Barton.’
‘Sparks, you can’t possibly—’
‘Like you, she doesn’t want children,’ continued Sparks. ‘Like you, she wants someone to talk to at the end of the day. And, like you, she loves books. In fact, she’s a librarian.’
‘I don’t know if this is a good idea, Sparks,’ he said.
‘That’s too bad, because she’s waiting in the hall outside,’ said Sparks, rising to her feet.
‘But—’ he protested.
She left. Then another woman entered.
‘Good morning, Mr Danforth,’ she said. ‘I’m Virginia Barton. I believe Miss Sparks has told you about me.’
‘Um, yes,’ he said. ‘Has she told you much about me?’
‘A little,’ she said. ‘I am so sorry about your recent tragedy.’