Chapter Seven
Fallon turned over again, frustrated that sleep wouldn’t come.
Initially, she’d attributed her restlessness to lack of physical activity.
Compared to most days at Firecamp, today had been practically sedentary.
But her mind kept sending reminders of the feel of Nora’s body against hers.
The fresh scent of her shampoo, combined with the smooth material of the dress that clung to her in all the right places, had embedded themselves in Fallon’s memory and were playing on a loop in her thoughts.
She’d admitted to herself on more than one occasion that she found Nora alluring, but before, it had always been abstract, like appreciating a beautiful painting she could never afford.
Having held her took that appeal to a whole other level of physical awareness.
She played through it again, her surprise at having Nora join her and how Nora’s casual lean against the wall next to her had set Fallon’s heart rate soaring.
So much so that when the creak of the bar door and the tipsy giggling had announced it was Gwen and Tina, pulling Nora to her had seemed like the most natural thing she’d ever done.
Afterward, and despite her immediate apology, she’d half expected Nora to slap her or cuss her out.
But in rerunning the incident now, she could feel Nora’s momentary surrender.
That astonishing feeling was keeping her awake. Nora giving in to her. Wanting her?
Fallon sighed and shifted, agitated. It was one thing to have plans or even dreams, but such yearning was useless.
She’d heard Nora talking one night after dinner about her intention to finish college in Arizona.
She envisioned it as mostly desert, although she knew there were higher elevation areas in that state too.
But why anyone would go there when they could stay in a beautiful location like this, Fallon couldn’t imagine.
It didn’t matter what she thought, though.
After all, she’d never included someone like Nora in her own prospects, mostly because she’d been by herself way longer than she’d ever been with someone else.
She tried to think about the future, as she’d always done when the present seemed unmanageable.
After dinner, Jade had told them their work on the road had been exemplary, and they’d begin the next phase of their task tomorrow.
It would be different, she warned them, sawing in the forest. The trees would be closer together, and unlike their last cut, where the road was their escape route, each step would have to be carefully planned.
They’d be working farther apart to minimize any possible accidents, but that meant it would be harder to get help if someone got into trouble.
“You’ll be counting on your partner more than ever, so I’m not going to assign teams for this week.
Since you know each other pretty well by now, you can pick who you want to work with.
And I’d be happy to work with any one of you.
Talk it over and let me know in the morning. ”
After Jade had said good night, Gwen and Tina went to their tent without comment.
Shortly after, Nora had excused herself and walked toward her tent.
The rest of them sat quietly. Everyone knew Gwen and Tina would partner up.
Next to Jade, Nora was the most experienced and should have been working with the person who needed the most help.
But Fallon hadn’t been able to stop thinking of sitting next to Nora in the truck bed, of Nora’s thigh against hers, of Nora’s hands as she’d tried to keep her dress from blowing, and how Fallon had wanted those hands to be hers and for the hemline to be going up, not down.
“I’ll partner with any of you,” Kennedy had offered, but she was looking at Fallon when she spoke.
“Same,” Delores had said.
Hannah had nodded, and Fallon had said, “Me too,” though she’d very much wanted to team with Nora, just to spend time together talking about their next cut and watching the way Nora’s arms flexed as she worked the chainsaw.
Now she wasn’t sure it was a good idea. Maybe it was best to keep admiring her from afar, as they said in books.
She hadn’t gotten much sleep, but Fallon couldn’t lie there anymore. She’d started breakfast when she heard someone come up behind her. “So who are you going to work with, Falcon?”
Nora’s voice was softer than usual and husky from sleep, but what struck Fallon was that Nora had never called her by her sawyer name before.
Frozen in place, Fallon couldn’t bring herself to turn.
She wondered if Nora could hear her breathing.
A sound in the woods drew her attention, and Jade appeared in front of her.
Fallon knew her face was flushed with emotion, but apparently, all Jade saw was uncertainty.
“Fallon’s working with me for today. I need to show her some things about leading a group that’s doing wildland cutting. Who are you working with, Nora?”
After the slightest pause, Nora said, “I’m not sure. Hannah and I have always gotten along, so maybe her?”
“Great. Let’s see what the rest of the crew has decided after we have breakfast.”
* * *
Walking through the forest, Fallon felt her equilibrium returning.
Following as Jade led the crew, she watched how different areas were assigned and helped mark which trees to cut by spraying a dot of bright blue paint at eye level on each trunk.
This was what she had come here for, she reminded herself.
Not to lose herself over someone who had other plans.
It took the better part of the morning, but Fallon began to distinguish the different tree species and find the sick or crooked or what Jade referred to as “worst offenders,” small trees that had sprung up too close to established ones.
She explained how those types would never get much bigger but would steal much-needed nutrients from their older neighbors.
Nora and Hannah were assigned to the area closest to camp. Jade had consulted with Nora after breakfast, and they’d sketched out who should be where, settling on Nora at one end and Jade on the other. “What about Gwen and Tina?” Jade had asked.
“Put them next to you. They should be as far from camp as possible,” Nora had said. Jade had simply nodded.
Watching as they talked, Fallon concluded she’d made entirely too much of what had happened yesterday.
Her emotions had carried her into some place that didn’t actually exist, like escaping into science fiction novels.
The most important thing was Nora’s willingness to reduce the possibility of Gwen making good on her threat.
That explained everything else. And as for this morning, Nora regularly helped with breakfast, and her question was just a question.
Using her sawyer name was a way to tease, to say everything was okay between them, no matter how sexy it had sounded.
After the other teams were set, the buzzing of chainsaws and cracking of splitting timber filled the air. As she and Jade set out their supplies, watching with amusement as Gwen and Tina argued over who would do what, Fallon appreciated being able to focus on the job.
Jade stopped before firing up her saw, surprising Fallon when she asked, “Is everything okay between you and Nora?”
“Uh-huh, sure,” Fallon said quickly. “She actually helped me with something yesterday, so…yeah.”
“Good. Her skills are a real asset.”
Tina’s voice carried over to them. “It is so my turn.”
Jade shook her head. “I’d really like to see those two make it through the program, but I have my doubts. What do you think?”
Fallon stopped herself from mentioning Gwen’s threats. “I want to see everyone make it. But do you think they have enough motivation?”
Jade shrugged. “They need to work on their commitment to the team. It’s too soon to tell, but I’ve seen Firecamp make a real difference in people’s lives. Still, old habits can be hard to break.”
“Do you think I’ll succeed in this program? I mean, can I become a leader like you?”
Jade turned to face her. “I’m sure you can make it through Firecamp.
But don’t try to be a leader like me. Be a leader like you.
” She spread her hands. “You have a good way with people, and your confidence will come in time. If you practice taking charge, you’ll find it feels more natural.
I know you can do it, but I’ll try to help you get there quicker. ”
Fallon nodded, tightened the bandana on her hair, and they went to work.
* * *
Nora didn’t appear to help with breakfast the next morning. When she joined the rest of the crew to eat, she looked tired. Fallon stood behind her as they scraped their dishes into the trash. “You doing okay?”
“I’m fine.” Nora’s voice had a snappish tone.
“I missed you this morning. As my assistant, I mean.”
Nora didn’t turn. Her voice was low, but Fallon heard every word. “Yeah, but you’re not missing me on your team, are you? I’m sure you and Jade are getting along just fine.”
“She’s helping me—” Fallon had to stop as Kennedy came up beside them.
“Are you the new teacher’s pet, Falcon?”
Nora moved away without another word. Jade’s words about taking charge echoed in Fallon’s head.
It was time. She punched Kennedy lightly on the shoulder.
“You know how you asked me what I wanted to do after Firecamp? Well, I think I’ve figured it out.
I don’t want Firecamp to end. I want to be Jade someday.
That’s why she’s working with me. So I can learn at least some of what she knows. ”
“Very cool, dude.” Kennedy punched her back. “You’d be a great Jade.”
Fallon made a point of not trying to see where Nora had gone. It didn’t matter. She had a job to do.
Her day got better when Jade had her assign the areas for the crew and only made one correction about the alignment. Fallon worked with each team to decide which trees to cut, and Jade marked them without comment.