Chapter 10
CHAPTER TEN
Iwas disappointed in myself.
For so many reasons.
But my number one was probably this: I knew I was falling for Tolliver Stone.
Hard.
Elle's words brought it to my attention, but deep down, I already knew. I was just living in denial. It was a happy place. Denial. Honestly, I kinda wished I was still there.
But after that kiss—that amazingly incendiary kiss—it was impossible to ignore my feelings.
Replaying how Tolliver's mouth felt against mine, the way I melted at his touch, how my heart rate sped up when he looked at me, took up way too much of my waking hours.
It was ridiculous. I was losing sight of my goal.
I couldn't count how many times I'd relived the kiss and couldn't believe I hadn't even thought of the tour. I needed to get back on track.
Plus, I couldn't give my heart to another jock.
It was a promise I'd made to myself after ending my relationship with Wayne. And honestly, it hadn't been hard to keep until now.
There was also my secret crush on Ryker Cordova to consider. HERS's drummer didn't know what he was missing. I was nothing if not loyal to my imaginary, one-sided relationships. Hopefully, if by some miracle we ever met, Ryker wouldn't get jealous of my new fake boyfriend—or vice versa.
I groaned, looking up at the ceiling of my bedroom, as I pushed the sleep from my eyes.
All these thoughts had kept me up last night, and they were still here at...
I checked the time on my phone and groaned again.
It was about 20 minutes before sunrise.
My page turner/reading buddy/fake boyfriend would be here soon, and thanks to my racing mind and lack of sleep, I felt like death warmed over.
Lovely.
Tolliver and I were still on the hook to attend Sabrina's sweet 16 as a couple. And okay, I wasn't entirely naive. That kiss had been hot on both sides, and Tolliver told me point-blank that he'd wanted to kiss me for a long time. Still, how could that be if we only met last week?
He looked at me like he meant it.
Tolliver didn't seem to have an insincere bone in his body.
A part of me wanted to believe he was falling for me too.
Tolliver was kind, genuinely. And funny. Gorgeous. Smart. Talented. And, oh goodness, I'd be a fool not to want him.
But I couldn't let anything happen. It wouldn't be fair to Tolliver. My heart was closed to athletes. Period.
Taking a deep breath, I set my mind straight.
My plan to push Tolliver away hadn't worked.
In fact, it had the opposite effect.
It was time to pivot. I'd had the whole weekend to think.
Tolliver was on a short trip with his family, so I hadn't seen him again.
He should be here soon for our morning reading session.
I was looking forward to it despite myself.
And it wasn't just because we were in a really good place in the book we were reading.
The new plan was simple.
Since trying to repulse him hadn't worked, I would pull him closer.
Let him in, let him see the real me.
Flaws and all.
No doubt, it would send Tolliver running.
That was the whole point. I didn't want to fall. I didn't want to hurt Tolliver, and I was determined to prove that he didn't really want me anyway. Being disappointed wasn't anything new—especially this summer—but I was ready to change that starting today.
I was smiling to myself as I stepped into the kitchen when...
"Honestly, I'm disappointed," Mom said.
I jumped, hand flying to my chest in surprise. "Jeez, Mom. What are you doing here so early?"
"I was waiting for you."
"Why are you sitting in the dark?"
She flicked on the light. "Thought I'd surprise you."
"Well, mission accomplished," I mumbled. "Thanks for the near heart attack."
"You've been avoiding my calls and texts."
It wasn't a question.
"I had no choice but to show up when you'd least expect it."
I shook my head, not to disagree because I had been ducking her messages, but that was just because they were always about the wedding. Grabbing a water from the fridge, I said, "I'm glad it was me and not Dad. He's so old he might've actually keeled over."
My father's laughter preceded him into the room. "Ouch, kid," he said, appearing fully dressed and looking wide awake like my mother. "Don't put me in the grave yet."
"Did you know she was coming?" I asked.
"Of course, I did."
"Who do you think let me in?" My mother tilted her head toward the coffee machine. "I put on a pot if you want any."
"Don't mind if I do," Dad said and filled a mug for himself. "Freya?"
I shook my head. "You know I only like the smell."
After he took a seat opposite my mom, I sat between them and waited.
"So, what's up?" I asked.
"Freya," Mom said, "you know what's up."
I did.
"Are you coming to my wedding?"
Glancing at my father to see his reaction, I was met only with raised brows.
"It would mean so much to me to have you there," she said.
I swallowed, voicing the main reason I'd avoided her calls. "Well, was Dad invited?"
"I was," my father said which made my eyes widen, but he placed a hand over mine. "But I'm still not sure if I'll go. I think your mother just did it to be nice."
Mom gave a quiet laugh. "No, I invited you because even though our marriage is over, Thaddeus, our friendship is still strong."
Dad frowned. "Apparently not strong enough to make you stop using my full name—which you know I hate."
"And I love teasing you about it, so..."
"I'll remember that, Francine."
Mom blanched then shook herself. "So?" she said to me.
"Of course, I'll be there, Mom," I said, placing my hand on top of hers. "I love you."
"You better. You're my only daughter after all."
I rolled my eyes then got up to throw my arms around her. "Not for long," I said.
She grunted as her arms circled me in return. "Stacia is a wonderful girl, and she already has a mother. I'm her coach."
"Soon to be stepmom."
"Well, I don't like the sound of that."
"Makes you think of Cinderella?"
"Exactly!"
"Mmm, you'll be a good one," I said then pointed a finger at her. "But just remember, she can't have you for keeps. I came first, and I'll end anyone who tries to take my place."
"So bloodthirsty," Dad said. "That's my Freya."
He kissed my head, and Mom just laughed.
"I think she's more excited about having you as a stepsister," my mother said. "Has she been in contact with you?"
Stepping back, she saw my frown and laughed again.
"I'll take that as a yes."
Yes, I'd gotten the messages from Stacia, asking if I want to look at dresses together, get our nails done, check out flowers and cake—honestly, I'd paused at that one—inquiring if I'd be bringing a plus one.
"Let's just say, you're not the only person I've been avoiding," I said.
"I knew it," Mom said.
I shrugged.
"You should answer her, Freya. I think she just wants to be your friend."
"Why?"
"Because she knows it would make me happy," Mom said.
And I could read between the lines.
I wanted to make my mother happy too, especially on this important day. So...
"I'll reply," I said, and when my parents continued to stare, I pulled out my phone. "Okay, fine, I'll do it now. Even though she's probably asleep and won't get it until—"
My cell buzzed a second later with Stacia's response.
I swallowed. "She said yay with three exclamation marks and that she can't wait to meet up followed by five hearts. And she already sent me the itinerary for the week."
I forced back my dismay, ignoring Mom's smile and my dad's muffled laughter.
"Stacia's really enthusiastic in the morning," I said through a yawn.
"She's like that all the time," Mom said.
I nodded.
When she made no move to leave, I asked, "Was there something else?"
"Oh yes, I'm staying to meet the boy," she said.
"What?"
"The hockey player."
My eyes widened as I looked from her to my dad, who looked guilty as hell.
"Dad!"
"What? She asked how you were doing, if there was anything new going on in your life," he said. "Tolliver's been over here nearly every day since you met."
He sniffed.
"It seemed important."
"Well, it's not," I said.
Mom tilted her head. "That's not what Stacia tells me. She heard that you were hanging around the rink with a certain player. After what your dad told me and her report, I knew I had to meet him."
"He might not even come today," I said.
Just then, a knock came at the door.
Mom shot me a wink. "And he's punctual. Gotta love that."
"He can read too," Dad said with a grin. "That's a plus."
"I'll get the door."
Oh Lord, kill me now.
* * *
"Wow, your mom's almost as scary as you," Tolliver said.
I held back a laugh. "Yeah, she's known for being a ballbuster," I said.
"Sounds like you admire that."
"Oh, I do."
Tolliver chuckled as he brought me a cup of tea and took a seat next to me on the couch. "Good to see where you get it from. She was cool too. I liked your mom."
My amusement vanished. "She liked you too."
"I was surprised she invited me to her wedding. That was wild."
Was it though?
As Mom was leaving, she'd thrown out the invite to him before pulling me into a hug, only to whisper conspiratorially, "Keep him," she said. "Tolliver's much better than that other guy."
"I don't even have him now," I murmured back.
"I think you're wrong. His eyes go soft when he looks at you, Freya."
I scoffed.
"Plus, he brought you tea." Her brows rose as if that was something significant, but I just said, "He always brings me something."
"Like I said," she repeated as she pulled away, "he's a keeper."
She was right, of course.
Tolliver was a total catch—just not for me.
Squaring my shoulders, I faced him on the couch. "Before we start reading, I need to tell you something," I said.
"Okay," he said, sitting back and gesturing for me to go ahead. "I'm listening."
Another pro, I thought.
Tolliver was an awesome listener.
He was all green flags and no red.
I sighed then said quietly, "You're going to make someone very happy someday."
"Thanks," he said.
"Welcome."
Tolliver raised a brow, waiting. "Are there more compliments coming or...?"