Chapter 22
TJ
I’m at an upscale restaurant, sitting across the table from Amber, also known as “hot girl from the MKE mixer” in my phone.
We’re having a delicious lunch. She’s as gorgeous as I remember, and she’s trying really hard to engage me.
She keeps leaning in and giggling at things I say, even when I’m commenting on something stupid like the impressive quality of the table napkins.
Usually I’d be eating this attention up right along with my salmon and salad, but today all I can think about is Lucy.
My friend Lucy.
I keep telling myself that, but it’s no use. I didn’t want to get invested, but I’m afraid it’s too late.
“I’m going to freshen up.” Amber bats her eyelashes at me and slides out of her seat. Before she leaves the table, she leans over and places her long fingers on my bicep. “I’m free all afternoon.”
I smile at her, hoping she can’t tell it’s forced.
She leans forward and places a kiss on my cheek, which is an aggressive move for a first date.
Props to her for her boldness. She hits me with a sultry smile before sauntering off.
She must’ve picked her dress, which hits above mid-thigh, and her soaring high heels for my benefit.
I feel bad that I’m not holding up my end of this date, but the only feeling I have as she struts away is relief. I take my phone out of my pocket and pull up the picture I took of Lucy’s gift.
It’s a cross-stitched hoop. There’s a chicken in the center, and beneath it, she’s stitched the words S-lay all day.
I grin just looking at it.
Lucy can cross-stitch. Lucy made a chicken pun. Lucy left this at my house … for me. It’s all I can think about. She’s all I can think about. I want to see her and talk to her, and none of that is lending itself to a very good date with Amber.
I don’t know what’s gotten into me, but for the first time since Tess died and I decided I never wanted to get so hung up on a woman again, I want to get hung up on a woman.
Or at least, spend more time with one woman in particular. I fear I’m already hung up on my friend.
A text notification drops down at the top of my screen from Anton.
Anton
Look who I found
He’s attached a picture, and when I open it, I’m greeted with the sight of Lucy curled up in a chair with a laptop resting on her knees.
She’s wearing a baseball hat, and her hair hangs like curtains around her face.
The way my pulse kicks up is borderline concerning, but I’m typing back before I can think more about it.
TJ
Where are you?
Anton
Mood Reader with Rose. In Cashmere Cove.
I hold up my hand, signaling to our waitress that I’m ready for the check. She nods in acknowledgment.
TJ
Someone needs to talk to you about the appropriate usage of emojis.
Anton
Rose told me to add them
See you soon, I’m guessing?
TJ
Yes.
Anton
That’s what I thought.
YOU’RE WELCOME
I roll my eyes for real, stashing my phone as the waitress hands me the check. I thank her and hand over my card.
“You ready to get outta here?” Amber purrs as she slips back into her seat.
More than she knows. I’m reenergized at the thought of seeing Lucy. I’m on the north side of the city, but I probably have about a thirty-minute drive to Mood Reader.
“Actually, something’s come up,” I tell Amber. “I’ve gotta run.”
She pouts. “That’s too bad. Rain check?”
“I’m not really interested in anything serious right now. With my busy schedule, I don’t know if I’ll have much free time in the future.”
A sour expression crosses her face. I can tell she thought this lunch date was going to end much differently.
“Well, you know how to get a hold of me. I can be available, even for just a quick rendezvous.” She wiggles her eyebrows, and I fight against a sour look of my own.
Suddenly, hooking up with women feels shallow.
Like it’s not good enough … for me or for them.
It seems the guys’ pep talks are finally getting to me.
That, or thinking about how Lucy has never been kissed—which is a subject I am very curious about but have very little idea how to broach with her—is making me think about how kissing anything that moves and looks my way isn’t how I want to act.
There was a time when I thought Tess would be the last woman I ever kissed, and I was content with that.
After she passed, I snapped. I knew I could never let myself get attached to another woman like I was attached to her.
The pain of losing her was enough for a lifetime.
So why not have some fun in the meantime, right?
It felt like a foolproof plan. It was. Until now … when it … isn’t.
I walk Amber to her car and then all but sprint to my truck.
I make the drive up to Cashmere Cove in twenty-five minutes.
The bell above the door at Mood Reader jingles when I walk inside.
Instrumental Christmas music greets my ears, and my shoulders tense, but I feel myself relaxing when I spot Lucy through the shelves.
She’s in the corner, at the back of the store, curled up in the same chair from the picture. She doesn’t look up when I enter.
Anton is leaning against the check-out desk in the center of the bookstore, angled toward Rose, who calls out a welcome.
Anton waves to me, but I motion for them to be quiet.
I don’t miss the look they exchange, but I ignore it.
I saunter through the cute book shop toward Lucy.
There are several patrons perusing the shelves, but they seem to be more interested in their book selections than they are in me.
I’m used to people making a big fuss when I walk into a room.
It’s kind of nice to blend in. To not feel like I have to put on a show.
Mood Reader is done up for Christmas. Twinkle lights are draped from the top of bookshelves.
The display tables are all covered with red-and-green fabric, and lots of the books feature holiday titles.
It smells like cinnamon and pine, and I have to admit I don’t hate it.
As I get closer to Lucy’s chair, I spot earbuds in her ears.
I drop into the empty chair next to her and stare. It takes a solid sixty seconds, but eventually she blinks as if coming out of a daze and looks over at me. She sucks in a breath.
“TJ,” she practically shouts. She pulls out her earbuds and tips the screen of her laptop down, angling it away from me. “What are you doing here?” she adds in a whisper.
I grin at her. “I came to thank you for the cross-stitched chicken.”
Lucy’s cheeks blush holly-berry red. “Oh, that.” She looks down. “It was silly.”
“Not to me. I love it. I didn’t know you could cross-stitch.”
“I can’t do it very well,” she downplays. “But yeah, I picked up the hobby a year or so ago. Something to do for my creativity that I don’t feel like I have to be perfect at, and … yeah …”
She works her jaw before pressing her lips together, almost like she feels like she said too much. I wish she would keep talking.
She squares her shoulders and finds her train of thought again. “How were the chickens when you got home?”
“Right as rain. Thanks for checking on them.”
“It was nothing. Happy to help.”
I nod. We stare at each other. I can’t get over how beautiful Lucy is up close. It shouldn’t still hit me like this. I’ve seen her a couple times now, but wow, she’s got this glow that steals my breath every time. Her freckles may as well be sugar crystals, and I’ve developed a sweet tooth.
I stretch my legs out in front of me, crossing them at the ankles. “So. Whatcha up to?” I motion to her computer. “Working on that novel?”
Her eyes bug out, and she darts a nervous glance around. “Shhh,” she hisses.
I arch my eyebrows, and the guilty look is back in her eyes. I sit up slowly, shifting so I’m facing her and blocking her view of the rest of the store. “Wait. I’m right, aren’t I? You’re a legit writer.”
Lucy looks almost pained. “Nobody knows. You can’t tell anyone.”
This three-minute conversation with Lucy is already three times more enjoyable than my entire lunch date with Amber.
“I’m an excellent secret keeper.” I cross my heart.
Lucy slouches into her chair and buries her face in her hands. “I can’t believe I told you.” She peeks through her fingers. “We can’t talk about this here. Come on.”
She stands and surprises me when she grabs for my hand and hoists me up. I follow her like a dog on a leash as she weaves through the store.
She pauses by the check-out desk. “Thanks for having me, Rose. I’ll be back.”
“Where are you two off to?” Anton says, and the lilt in his voice isn’t lost on me.
“TJ is having some digestion issues, and I have medicine at Daisy’s,” Lucy says without missing a beat.
“Aw, feel better soon, TJ,” Rose responds.
Anton arches his eyebrows. I shake my head at him over the top of Lucy, but he grins.
“I’m not—” I cut myself off when Lucy glares over her shoulder and levels me with a look that says, Don’t say a word. “I will,” I amend.