Chapter 5
Chapter
Five
NOW
B ram started laughing the moment he opened the door to let Aiden in. “That shell-shocked expression can only mean one thing. The human just posted a new review.”
“No, this is so much worse,” Aiden said as he stepped inside, then threw himself down onto Bram’s couch.
“That bad? Need a drink?”
“Yes, please, but not what you’re drinking.”
Bram scoffed. “I’m not wasting perfectly good blood on you.”
Aiden never would have predicted that his best friend, aside from Zayn, would be a vampire. He hadn’t been around one before. Wolf shifters and vampires tended to avoid each other whenever possible, but there was a natural camaraderie to being part of the small handful of supernaturals at their university. It was nice to have someone who knew what he was and understood the issues he had, even if their particular issues were never quite the same. He’d been surprised by how well they got along, though it had taken time to get used to the scent of a vampire. Bram still smelled a bit like death to him, but Aiden couldn’t hold that against him.
Bram grabbed Aiden a beer and sat on the other end of the couch. “What’s up? Did the human get another boyfriend?”
Thankfully, no. Zayn didn’t date or hook up often anymore, but when he did, it always killed Aiden a little inside. Their sophomore year had been particularly rough. Zayn had been experimenting, but that phase had mostly passed.
Right now, a boyfriend might have been easier to deal with.
“One of his viewers sent him a package to review. And I mean that literally. It was the Richard Knotz merch.”
Bram’s eyes widened. “Seriously? Oh shit, dude. That’s not coo—Wait. Did he review it? Holy shit. Did he post it on his site?” He grabbed for his phone, and Aiden groaned.
“Yes, yes, and not yet.”
Bram sagged against the couch and let out a sigh of relief. “Oh thank god. I was imagining a thousand-plus humans watching him review that thing.” He glanced at Aiden. “But you saw it?”
“Yeah. He… uh… enjoyed it.”
“Same, man. Can’t blame him. Richard’s merch is a work of art. Have you tried it? It’s amazing. But who was the dumbass who sent it to him?”
“Someone with access to MateHub, obviously. He gets higher views when he reviews fantasy dildos, so I’ve always suspected at least a few supernatural types had joined his site.”
“Hold on. Let me check something.” Bram scrolled on his phone as Aiden sipped his beer.
“Oh, here we go. I rarely check the Off Topic board on the MateHub forum. I mean, I’m there for the MateHub stars. Who’d want to talk about anything else? But there’s a thread about him, started a few months ago. Some of the forum members love his reviews.”
He passed over his phone so Aiden could scroll through the thread. Yep, Zayn might not know about the supernatural community, but at least one corner of the supernatural community knew about him. Fuck.
He was about to hand the phone back when Bram’s username caught his eye. “Bram… Stroker?”
“I’ve been told it was a stroke of genius.” Bram shrugged.
“It’s a stroke of something, alright.”
“I can’t believe some idiot sent him Richard’s merch. But damn, can you imagine him reviewing all of MateHub’s merch? The entire Shifter Line. Richard’s is the best, of course, but ooh, I wonder how he’d feel about the shark shifters. Or there are some thick bear shifter toys. He might like those.”
Aiden growled before he could stop himself, and Bram raised an eyebrow at him.
“Really, dude? I’ve never seen you get truly growly and possessive over him, even when he has a boyfriend. The Richard Knotz is where you draw the line?”
It was a dumb reaction, but he was still jealous of a goddamn toy. “It’s one thing when he’s reviewing fake fantasy tentacle dildos, but MateHub’s merch is modeled after real guys, and I do not measure up.”
Bram snorted. “Nobody measures up to Richard. He’s a legend for a reason.” He cocked his head. “If Zayn did reviews for MateHub, do you think he’d get to meet him?”
“He can’t do reviews for MateHub, you know that.”
“And you know you have to report this, right? MateHub has an emergency contact number in case a human finds out about the site. I bet it’s the same for their toys.”
Aiden sighed. “I know. I just… He smells so good.”
Bram looked over at him with a soft expression. “You thought this might be your chance to tell him?”
“It’s stupid, right? The fact that I’ve been mooning over him for more than three years.”
“Nah. It’d be stupid if you waited another three.”
“What if he freaks out?”
“Then he wasn’t good enough for you in the first place.”
“He’s more than good enough for me.”
“Then you shouldn’t have to worry about him freaking out. But if you aren’t going to tell him, you need to contact MateHub. Before he posts that video.”
Aiden grimaced. “I’ll call them tonight.”
Aiden stared at the MateHub contact page and its giant ‘In Case of Emergencies*’ phone number listed right at the top.
The asterisk led to a note farther down the page that said, “Needing to get railed by any or all of our stars does not constitute an emergency.”
He dialed the number.
“MateHub Studios. How may I help you?” a pleasant customer service voice said after it connected.
“Um, I’m not sure if I should contact you about this, or your store, or who, but uh, my roommate is human, and…” He trailed off.
“Did he see the site, sir?” the lady on the phone asked.
“No. Uh. He somehow got a MateHub toy and wants to upload a video of him using it to the internet. The human internet. And that seems like a bad idea.”
“It’s okay,” she said, her tone soothing. “This has happened before. There are protections and protocols in place. It was part of the agreement the mages made with us before making the things. They included safety measures in case some unknowing human got their hands, or other parts of their anatomy, on one. He’ll never be able to upload that video. It’ll corrupt itself if he tries to post it anywhere other than MateHub or OnlyMates.”
Well, that was terrifying. How did they monitor that?
“Can we send a mage to take care of the situation?”
Aiden’s stomach dropped. “What do you mean by ‘ take care of ’?”
“Not like that. We need to make sure he won’t expose us. Our mage will ask him a few questions to assess the situation and go from there. Most of the time, that requires a memory spell or blood oath of secrecy. Neither will harm the human.”
“Okay. I suppose.” He gave her their address, and she told him a mage would be there the following evening.
“In the meantime, would you be able to get the toy back from him?”
“He seems… quite fond of it. I don’t think he’ll give it up without a fight.”
The lady laughed. “That’s usually how it goes. Which model is it?”
“The Richard Knotz model.”
“That’s definitely a fan favorite. Size queens love it.”
Aiden wanted to protest that Zayn wasn’t a size queen, but that didn’t seem like information she needed to know.
“Don’t worry. We’ve got this covered. Our mage will handle it.”
“Okay, thank you,” he said, then stared at his phone for a good minute after he’d hung up, hoping he’d done the right thing.