Chapter 5 ELLA
“We’re going to pick up the new cage. We'll be an hour.“
“It’s the perfect addition,” Ella mumbled.
“Can’t wait to see you in it, girl,” Zee said and brushed her arm. “Come on, Oliver.”
Zee turned from her and headed towards the door with Oliver following.
“See you later at Club Bandit,” Helena said.
“Can’t wait. Thanks for loaning Oliver,” Zee said from the doorway.
“Not a problem. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you guys,” Oliver said.
“And he’s a very good boy.” Helena pulled Oliver’s face to her, cupped the back of his neck and drew him in for a long kiss.
Ella’s heart stabbed with jealousy.
Zee had barely looked at her, so eager to get away from her.
That’s how it had been ever since he told her she had to cancel her trip to see Annie.
He’d spent the last few nights out late, and when he came home, he barely said two words to her.
Ella didn’t like the way her mind drifted, but with Zee choosing to go back to work full time, and this iciness between them, she couldn’t shake this loneliness.
An idea snuck into her thoughts, whispering that he didn’t want her.
The thought tasted sour in her mouth. Ella looked away from her friends, blinking back tears.
“Bye!” Oliver called, closing the door behind Zee.
“He didn’t even set the security alarm,” Ella mumbled, coming to do it.
“Maybe his mind is on tonight. Max told him he couldn’t be there to help with set up at the last minute and Greg finished this custom cage build. It is pet night,” Helena said from the couch.
“Yeah, that must be it.” Ella took the seat opposite her friend and searched for something to say, but the words wouldn’t come.
“You two were quiet at lunch.” Helena raised a cool eyebrow and fluffed her blonde hair.
“Tired. It’s still an adjustment, Zee’s new schedule.” Ella strolled into the kitchen, needing to find something to do.
Her mood had slid back into aloofness, like she was keeping everything detached from her.
She turned the kettle on, bringing down the two mugs.
“That’s a change. Is everything okay, Ella?” Helena’s soft, concerned voice almost undid her.
She swallowed. Her crying wouldn’t solve anything.
Zee apologized to her for having to cancel the trip to see Annie.
She forgave him, and that should have been the end of it, but she couldn’t shake it. She blew out a frustrated sigh, berating herself for feeling like a pouty teenager not getting her way.
The last thing she wanted was for Zee to grovel and beg for her forgiveness.
Ella grabbed her remote and changed the music to something more upbeat, trying to force her mood.
“Nothing’s wrong.”
The kettle boiled. She poured the water over the tea bags.
“You can’t fool me, Ella.”
Ella glanced over her shoulder at one of her oldest friends, shaking her head.
“Helena.”
“Hey, you know you can tell me anything,” Helena said from the kitchen doorway.
Ella was grateful for her long friendship with Helena and Oliver.
They were the first couple they met in the lifestyle shortly after they bought this estate. Zee had gone to a few local events, while Ella stayed at home with the girls.
Helena was also home with her three sons while finishing her master’s, so the couple met when they could, and it was nice to have friends that were in the lifestyle but also knee-deep in homework and sports activities.
“It’s stupid to think he’s cheating.” Ella didn’t mean to blurt the words out, but the way Helena held the silence got to her.
She clapped a hand over her mouth.
“Honey, no,” Helena came over and draped her arm around Ella’s shoulders. “I’m sure you have reasons for thinking that. Zee loves you.”
“I know he loves me, Helena, but…” The words dried up in her throat.
She believed Zee when he told her he didn’t step out on her during those long road trips.
But she knew he casually played with others; that never bothered her because a scene didn’t have to be sexual or a commitment.
“He’s always looking at his phone. There is something he isn’t telling me. And yeah, we’ve been kind of distant. He is treating me as if I’m fragile.”
“Come drink this tea. That helps.” Helena carried the tea through to the great room and set it on the table.
“Does it help, the tea?”
Helena smiled, lifting hers to her lips. “I think rituals help.”
Ella surveyed the pink dress with cartoon dinosaurs she had waiting for her on her mannequin, needing to put space between her and her friend.
The dress was meant for her friend Kayleigh's little girl.
Her cheeks heated in embarrassment; she hadn’t meant to blurt that all out.
“Why do you think he’s treating you as if you’re fragile?”
Ella grabbed a handful of pins from her sewing cart and strode over to the dress Helena had brought her.
The shiny pink fabric with ruffles needed a lot of help.
“I don’t know if I would call this horrible but…”
“It’s a horrible dress!” Helena shook her head, her long curls bouncing on her shoulders. “And you’re a good friend to help me. Talk, and I’ll listen. I know how to do that.”
“You know how to do a lot of things.” Ella stabbed a pin in along the seam, surprised at the bitterness in her voice.
“The fragile thing, care to explain?” Helena strode back to the couch, taking a seat, curling her feet up under her.
Ella put down the pins, knowing she wasn’t going to work on the dress until her friend was satisfied.
“Annie was chosen to play at an art gallery opening on Friday. Zee bought me a ticket to go out.”
“Annie’s going to love that! Maybe you’re anxious about the trip?”
“But then the university decided to name an award after Zee’s coach, and I can’t skip the award ceremony. He didn’t realize it was on the same date when he bought me the ticket.”
“Oh! He’s a scummy bone bastard!” Helena reached over and squeezed her shoulder.
Ella laughed, throwing her head back, and the relief of tension made her relax.
“Thank you. Ever since then, he’s been treating me as if I’m going to break.”
Helena cocked a cool, elegant eyebrow at her.
“He knows how much this hurt you, and he doesn’t want to disappoint you. The man probably thought of any way he could fly you out there and get you back in time for the award thing.”
“Yeah.” That would explain why Zee still searched the airline sites.
“But he needs to bring you in close. Or you need to ask for what you need.”
The sly smile Helena gave her was definitely her Domme look.
“I want him to initiate,” Ella said as she sipped her tea. She knew she sounded petulant.
It took open, honest communication to maintain the kind of relationship they had. But to be fair, she didn’t know what she needed until Helena laid it out for her.
“Ella, the last thing the man wants to do is grab you by the throat and force you to your knees. He’s a Dom, not an asshole.”
And that’s exactly what she liked about Zee, that despite his flaws, he was a decent human who loved her, loved their family and always wanted to do what was right for them.
Their D/s relationship took on different forms throughout the years until it resembled something that flowed effortlessly.
But they still had to nurture it, to feed it every once in a while.
Service made Ella happy. Zee implemented routines and rituals over the years because that was what he needed.
But he warned her when they were dating all those years ago.
“I don’t want a grown-up playing the part of a spoiled brat. You know I expect obedience, you know I expect you to speak up and open your mouth if you want something from me. What I want is a happy submissive who wants to be my sex slave.”
The words had jarred her into complete silence.
That wasn’t what she’d envisioned when Zee introduced her to BDSM.
That wasn’t what the romance books she read gave her a picture of.
Zee lifted her chin, stared right into her eyes, and her insides clenched at how intense his words sounded.
“Happy to serve, yes, but happy to please me, above all else. I want my girl to ask for that spanking she needs, to giggle when I pull her in my lap and feed her dinner and when I spread her legs wide open, she eagerly spreads them wider because she knows I’m in the mood to play with what’s mine. ” Zee held her chin until she squirmed.
“Please let me go,” Ella had whispered.
“I’ll never let you go. But I’ll release your chin because you asked,” Zee had dropped his fingers from his hold and Ella had gasped then flung her arms around his neck, kissing him.
He’d laughed, and they’d fucked like bunnies on the old sofa.
Now, Ella brought her thoughts back to the present.
“I know. Like you said, this new routine is a hard change. I’m going back to the dress. I think you need to put it on.”
“That’s because you don’t like what I said!” Helena grinned, already unbuttoning her blouse.
“No, this isn’t my idea of punishment.” Ella carefully took the dress off the dummy and helped her friend get into it.
“My sister has no taste. It’s like I stepped out of a 1980s catalogue.”
“It’s not horrible,” Ella soothed, walking around her friend in a circle. “It’s an interesting historic garment.“
The neon-pink hue didn’t do much for Helena’s skin tone.
“If I let it out at the waist, it won’t be so molded to your skin and it’ll lose that mermaid vibe. But is that okay? What will the other bridesmaids be wearing?”
“That’s fine. It’s the only way to save it,” Helena said. “I’ll text the others. There are five more… can you do all the dresses like this?”
“When’s the wedding?”
“Three months out.”
“That’s a lot of time. Drop them off on the weekend.”
“Thanks, Ella. You are the kindest friend.“
Ella smiled, making a couple of marks on the dress, pinning it where she had to.
Sewing was just something she did, and she was always happy to help her friends.
Her designs could never grace the catwalks, unlike her friend Sasha, who went to school for fashion design.
She learned to sew from her mother and found that it was something she was good at and stuck with.
Making the corsets for sale with proceeds going to the foundation allowed her to work with beautiful fabrics and create one of a kind pieces.
“This is your last night at the club for a few nights?” Helena asked after she was stripped out of the dress and back in her clothes.
“Yes. Until Sunday for Submissive Discussion night.” Ella laughed. “We have three new submissives coming, obviously recommended by members.”
Club Bandit had tried to open its doors to the public a smattering of times over the years.
The last attempt was having public play parties.
But it was so much work to screen non-members that Ella was relieved when the founding members voted against it. Guests of members were welcome, but they had to be pre-screened.
“Oh, I love newbies,” Helena said. “They scare so easily.”
“That’s not the point of Submissive Discussion Night,” Ella said. “The topic is nonverbal safety cues during a scene.”
“I have a demo planned if we have time” Helena smiled, her eyes bright.
“Your demos are always good,” Ella said. But her heart wasn’t in it.
She loved co-hosting these submissive discussion nights, but this was the first one where she hadn’t put a lot of energy into planning it.
Ella hadn’t ordered catering for the night, hadn’t sent an email reminder to the registered guests who were coming, and she hadn’t checked to see if one of their helpers had availability that night.
Ella cleared the teacups, trying to shake off her moody thoughts.
Her phone beeped, with a text from Zee.
Get over here, dear heart.
Totally silly how her pulse jumped at the text and the grin on her face spread.
“I’ve been summoned,” Ella said, putting down her phone.
“Then let’s not keep your Master waiting.” Helena grabbed her bag from the coffee table, walked with Ella to the front door and slipped on her heels.
“I thought of buying myself a plane ticket and going out there. Isn’t that naughty?” Ella grabbed her jacket, throwing it on.
Helena’s rich laugh made Ella grin in return.
“No. The difference between you and me is I would already be on that plane, not here serving.” Helena held the door open for Ella. “But that’s why you’re his faithful slave and I’m a Domme.”
“Yeah.” Ella set the security system, locked the door and followed Helena to her car, pushing away her jumble of emotions.
She bit the inside of her cheek, knowing that if she told her best friend Nora what happened over the plane ticket, Nora wouldn’t get it.
Ella was grateful Helena understood even if she wouldn’t live the way Ella does.
“Ella, even if something is distracting Zee, you know he only has heart and eyes for you. Maybe he’s not done processing it, whatever it is, and when he’s ready, he’ll tell you.”
“I know. I want to nag.” Ella shook her head, the thought silly.
“But you won’t,” Helena said.
“I won’t.”
Rolling down their estate to Club Bandit, Ella glanced out the window, taking in the twilight sky, the forest in the back lot, the fields they hadn’t gotten to yet along with the three cabins.
Zee had given her adventure over the years.
He was a great husband and father, and if she got overwhelmed by the 24/7 role, she knew her Dominant did too.
She trusted Zee, and all her thoughts were probably a needless exercise causing her worry. She could do what was expected of her and ask for what she needed.