Chapter 28
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Rylee
It felt like forever since I’d seen my man.
In reality, it had only been a month, but I couldn’t shake the feeling he was only making the effort to visit when I had an important doctor’s appointment.
Today we’d be finding out the sex of our baby, and when we talked on the phone, he seemed happy and excited, but he hadn’t said another word about our future, and that scared me.
I was sure I wanted all of the things he’d claimed to want. Marriage. Babies. And that picture-perfect home life he painted. But had he changed his mind? Or was he just giving me the time and space he thought I needed to adjust to all the changes in my life?
I was already waiting outside when Cam pulled up to the curb, but before I could get in his truck, he was jumping out, picking me up in his arms and swinging me around while kissing me like no one was watching.
“Damn, I’ve missed you.” His eyes drifted to my stomach.
I’d purposely worn a tight-fitting black cotton top over leggings with an open jacket, because just this week, I’d started to pop. I had the tiniest little baby bump and it was so exciting I couldn’t wait to show it off.
“Oh, wow.” His hands covered my belly as a smile lit up his handsome face. “You gotta know I’m lovin’ this.” His mouth drifted down my neck, as he whispered in my ear, “I can’t wait to get you alone later, so I can show you how much I love it.”
Just like that, all my fears melted away. I could feel his love for me in the way he held me, touched me, looked at me. No one had ever loved me the way he did… and it healed all the broken parts of me.
“I missed you so much,” I said, fisting his shirt in my hands. “Why the hell did you stay away so long?”
“Patience, beautiful.” He winked before opening the passenger’s door for me. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you good things are worth waiting for?”
“That must be true,” I teased, as he reached over to secure my seatbelt before stealing another kiss. “Look how long you’ve been waiting for me, old man.”
He couldn’t hide his grin as he dipped his head, promising, “I’ll get you for that later,” before closing the door.
I watched him walk in front of the vehicle, and couldn’t still my racing heart. Something felt different today. Sure, I was amped up about seeing Cam and finding out the gender of our baby, but it was even more than that.
When he slipped in beside me and fastened his seatbelt before pulling away from the curb, I realized what felt different.
The fear and anxiety I’d been wearing like a second skin since I was a kid had faded into the background.
It was just a fragment of the past now, like all the other bad memories.
The past couldn’t hurt me anymore. Because I was safe. He made me feel safe.
“I love you,” I whispered, feeling the emotion thicken my words. “Like, I really love you.”
He smiled, frowning slightly as he side-eyed me. “Why do you make it sound like a revelation? You didn’t know you loved me before?”
“It’s never felt like this,” I admitted, still kind of awed by the magnitude of what I was feeling for him. “Nothing has ever felt like this.”
He kissed my hand. “Good, that means you’re finally catching up. Because I’ve been feeling that way for a while now.”
It scared me a little, to feel so much. But I refused to let that fear get in our way anymore.
Because I finally saw Cam for who he was.
Like he told my mama, he was the kind of guy who stayed.
When things got hard, he’d be there. To hold me, dry my tears, chase away all the old ghosts who still tried to spook me sometimes.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you,” I whispered to him. “Or maybe this is God making it up to me, for all that crap I had to go through as a kid. And if it is? I’d do it all again just to have this one shot with you.”
He closed his eyes as we pulled up to a traffic light and swallowed a couple of times before he said, “Girl, you don’t know what you do to me when you say stuff like that.”
“It’s true.” If I’d been given a gift with words, maybe it was so I could tell this man how much I loved him. “And I want to give you what you’ve given me. I want to make you feel safe. I want to make you feel loved. And I want to give you the family you’ve always wanted.”
He drew a shuddering breath and bit his lip, like he was overcome with emotion. “You know how long I’ve been waiting to hear you’re all in? Probably since the night I showed up on your doorstep and you invited me in.”
A burst of laughter spilled out before I covered my mouth with my free hand. “If we have a son, don’t ever tell him about how we met. If he knows his mama propositioned his daddy the first night we met, he’d probably lose all respect for me.”
And more than anything, I wanted our kids to respect me.
He smirked. “I love the way we met.” He winked at me. “I wouldn’t change a thing about it.”
“Did you ever think we’d end up here?” I smiled, feeling deep contentment settle in. “I mean, it’s crazy, isn’t it? Everything about my life feels different, better, since I met you. But it hasn’t been that long.”
“Twin flames, remember?”
We pulled into the doctor’s office parking lot as I echoed, “Yeah, twin flames.”
We were flying high after leaving the doctor’s office. The doctor reassured us all was well with my pregnancy… and we were having a girl!
I couldn’t have been more excited. I would have been thrilled either way, but now that I knew the gender, my daydreaming would surely take on a life of its own.
“Okay,” I said, trying to remember how to breathe. “Baby names. Do you have any favorites?”
Cam laughed. “Uh, no. I just found out ten minutes ago we’re having a girl, so you’ll have to give me a minute to think about it.”
“Callista,” I blurted. “Callie, for short.”
He seemed to consider that for a second before he said, “Actually, I really like that.”
“It means most beautiful.”
His smile grew before he said, “And if she looks anything like her mama, it will be fitting.”
“Keep talking like that,” I warned. “And we won’t even make it back to my place.” I pointed at a boutique hotel not far from the strip. “How ‘bout a pit stop?”
“As tempting as that is,” he said, shifting his seat. “We’re not going back to your place. I’ve got other plans for you tonight.”
“Is that so?” I asked, leaning in to slip my hand under his soft cotton shirt. “Where are you taking me?”
He curled his hand around my wrist when I started venturing below his belt. “Keep doin’ that and I’m pulling this thing over. To hell with my surprise.”
I pouted before withdrawing my hand. “Fine, since I love surprises, I’ll behave. But I hope it won’t take too long. I wasn’t kidding when I told you this pregnancy makes my engine rev constantly, and it’s been a month already.”
I knew I sounded a little whiny, but I couldn’t help myself. I needed him. Now.
He turned on the radio, a country station that often played my music. It made me think of putting my career on hold, and the fact I wasn’t even sad about it anymore.
“Luc’s been so great about postponing my tour.”
“Yeah, bet that’s a relief, huh?”
“It is.” He assured me the label had been built on the ‘family first’ motto and that would never change, confirming I made the right decision when I signed with them.
“He promised me they’d work hard behind the scenes to keep my music out there, and continue to build my fan base, so when I’m ready, I can hit the ground running. ”
“I’m sure you won’t want to be on the sidelines for long. Music is a part of you. You love it. And I want our daughter to grow up knowing what passion like that looks like.”
I loved Cam even more for not making me feel like I had to choose between our daughter and my career. “Luc told me not to rush back. He said, as a parent himself, he didn’t want me to miss those precious infant days because they went by way too fast.”
“I bet they do.”
He was driving out of the city toward Franklin, making me curious, but I didn’t want to ruin his surprise.
“Maybe we’ll have to have a few kids. You know, so we’ll get to enjoy those infant years a little longer, hmm?”
“Maybe we will.”
He lit up when he talked about having kids with me. And that lit me up. My whole life I’d wondered what it would be like to have a family, and thanks to him, I would finally get to experience it.
“Seriously?” he asked, sounding surprised. “You’d consider having more than one or two kids?”
I smiled. “Why does that surprise you?”
“I know how much your career means to you. And it wouldn’t be easy, being pulled in so many different directions.
That was one of Austin’s concerns, actually.
He knows how talented you are, and how hard you’ve worked for this opportunity.
He doesn’t want to see anything or anyone get in the way of that. ”
I caressed my tiny bump absently. “I love Austin, and I appreciate his concern, but he couldn’t possibly understand what this is like for me. Like you, he grew up in a nice, normal family, right?”
“Yeah, they’re good people.”
“When you grow up alone, the way I did, all you want is people to love you.” I breathed through the heaviness in my heart. “When you finally get that, winning awards or becoming rich and famous can’t compare. Nothing can compare to that feeling of belonging.”
I bit my lip to stem the flow of tears. I knew it was probably healthy to let these emotions out, but sometimes I feared if I started, I’d never stop sobbing for the little girl I used to be.
“And you’ve made me feel like I belong… to you. Our baby. Even your family. I mean, I already loved Eden like a sister. But now that she’s going to be my baby’s auntie, we’ll officially be family.”
“Don’t forget my parents.” He rolled his eyes. “Believe me when I tell you, you’re their new favourite person since they found out you’re giving them their first grandbaby.”
I giggled, feeling a rush of warmth infuse me. Just knowing they accepted me, and my relationship with their son was everything.