Chapter Five
Five
Avery looked at herself in the mirror after she got dressed for her now regular Tuesday night with Taylor and bit her lip. She had no idea what they were doing tonight. All Taylor had said about what to wear this time was to “lean risqué.” What did that even mean? Not helpful, Taylor! After she’d mentally surveyed her entire wardrobe (twice), she’d decided on a button-down sundress; she’d undone one button at the top, and enough from the bottom to have a slit up to her thigh. She looked at herself in the mirror, and her face got hot. Wasn’t this too much?
No. She was going to do it. She was pretty sure this was a challenge from Taylor, and she wanted to win it. Yeah, she wasn’t getting graded on this, but she did want to surprise Taylor, show that she had more gumption than Taylor might give her credit for.
And she wanted Taylor to know that she was taking this seriously. After the past two weeks, when she’d whined and complained as soon as Taylor had picked her up—and ended up having a good time—she wanted to start tonight with a better attitude.
So far, Taylor hadn’t made her do any of the scary stuff she’d worried about, like go to bars and make her go talk to women, or buy them drinks, or get their phone numbers. But even scarier had been the idea that Taylor would judge her on what she did, and she hadn’t done that, either.
Granted, Taylor had given her feedback last week, but it wasn’t mean, just friendly. Kind. A little funny, slightly mocking, sure, but in a way that hadn’t made her feel bad. Just like Taylor always was.
“Okay, what is it today?” she asked as she got into Taylor’s car. “Also, I can drive sometimes, you know. I feel bad that you drive every time.”
Taylor shook her head.
“That’s okay, I like driving. Plus, if you drove, I’d have to tell you in advance where we were going.”
Avery grinned at her.
“I know.”
Taylor grinned back.
“Nice try, though.” Her smile got bigger as she glanced over at Avery’s outfit, her eyes lingering, just for a second, at the slit in her dress. How could she make Avery’s whole body tingle just from a look? “I will say this, good work with tonight’s dress code.”
Avery smiled shyly and looked away. And then she remembered what Taylor had said last week and made herself turn to face her.
“Thank you,” she said, looking straight at Taylor.
Taylor looked into her eyes as she nodded slowly.
“You’re welcome,” she said. “You were right, you are a quick study.”
It never felt weird or uncomfortable when Taylor looked at her like that, it just made her feel good. Maybe because her look was appreciative, not leering.
“Here’s another tip,” Taylor said as she started the car. “If someone gives you a compliment, and you want to flirt with them, you give them a compliment in return.”
“Oh.” Avery looked closer at Taylor’s outfit. Oh no. Taylor was so sexy on a normal day, without even really trying, that it was honestly hard to look at her dressed like this. She had on a short-sleeved black jumpsuit that zipped up the front; if Avery had thought she was being adventurous by unbuttoning one button of her dress, that was nothing compared to how far down Taylor’s jumpsuit was unzipped. There was a little bit of her bra peeking out, and a faint glistening of sweat from the heat of the day in the hollow of her breasts. Avery had to look away.
“Um, I like your outfit, too.”
Taylor burst out laughing.
“Oh, sweetheart, your compliments have to sound like you mean them.”
“I did mean it! I just didn’t mean to say it like that.” Avery had known, even as she heard herself say it, that it was the wrong thing, but what was she supposed to say? You’re the sexiest person I’ve ever met, and that is very evident tonight ? She couldn’t say that. She wasn’t supposed to be flirting with Taylor, first of all. And secondly, while she knew Taylor wouldn’t laugh at her, she would probably just pat her on her hand and tell her that was very sweet but Avery wasn’t her type, which would be humiliating.
It wasn’t like Avery wanted to date Taylor, anyway! Taylor was for the 400-level class; Avery was very firmly still in Flirting 101.
Taylor turned to her with a smile. Good, Taylor hadn’t taken offense at her unconvincing compliment.
“Well, thank you,” Taylor said, laughter in her voice. “We’ll work on that delivery. On a different topic: Margot and Luke are together, huh? I always knew he had a thing for her.”
“Oh, she told you?” Avery grinned. “I’m happy for them.”
“She didn’t exactly tell me, but he picked her up from the winery the other day and it was very clear,” Taylor said. “It explains why Margot has been smiling so much lately—it freaked me out.”
They drove over to Sonoma and parked on a side street, a few blocks off the main square. Avery followed Taylor out of the car and toward a divey-looking bar not too far away. She noticed other women were walking in the same direction. Were they going to a lesbian bar? Was she dressed correctly for a lesbian bar? Was a sundress with a high slit and flat sandals the right outfit?
It must be; Taylor had complimented her on the outfit.
Oh God. Maybe Taylor was going to make her hit on women tonight. Should she put more lipstick on? Or take what she had on off? Taylor would tell her if she should, right?
She saw the big chalkboard sign outside the bar and stopped. Then she laughed out loud and turned to Taylor, who had a big grin on her face.
“Burlesque?” she said, still laughing. “We’re going to a burlesque show? Oh my God.”
Taylor patted her on the shoulder.
“I thought it would be a little outside your comfort zone,” she said. “But I wasn’t sure if it would be so far out of your comfort zone that you’d run away screaming; I’m glad that you haven’t done that…yet.”
Avery put an injured expression on her face, even though it was pretty far outside her comfort zone. She’d never been to a burlesque show before—obviously—but what if it was the kind of thing where they did lap dances or things like that? She would die. Or what if it was, like, stand-up comedy where they tried to get audience participation? She would die all over again.
She couldn’t let Taylor know that these scenarios were running through her head, though.
“You think that little of me?” she asked Taylor.
Taylor slid an arm through hers.
“Mmm—I notice we’re still standing outside.”
Avery tossed her head with a bravado that she didn’t feel.
“I was waiting for you. Let’s go inside; we want to get a good seat for the show.”
Taylor laughed again as they walked inside.
It definitely was a lesbian bar; that was clear from the clientele. But it was a very diverse one—women and nonbinary people of many races, ethnicities, and styles of dress. And thank goodness, her outfit wouldn’t be totally out of place here; she saw at least a few other femmes in cute sundresses and lipstick, though most of them also wore Birkenstocks instead of strappy flat sandals like hers. She had Birkenstocks! Next time, she’d wear them. She was probably the only person in the room without a tattoo, but hell, as far as any of them knew, she had a tattoo in a place none of them could see!
Taylor seemed to know quite a few people here, too, from the number of them waving at her from across the room. Taylor knew people everywhere. She nodded back at a few, and then turned to Avery, a sly little smile on her face.
“You said you wanted a good seat—there are still plenty up front?”
Avery blanched, but after what she’d said outside, she felt like she had to do it.
“Sure, okay, yeah, yes, of course. We should definitely grab one of the seats up front. I’ve never been to one of these before; I’ve got to get a good view, after all.”
Taylor looked amused, which irritated Avery a little. Did she think Avery was scared to sit up front? Before she could make fun of her more, Avery charged ahead and settled into one of the little tables near the stage. Taylor followed her a few seconds later.
“Do you want a drink?” Taylor asked. “I’ll head over to the bar to get them—I know the bartender working tonight.”
Of course she did.
“Yeah, sure,” Avery said. “Gin and tonic, please.”
Taylor strolled over to the bar, and Avery bit her lip. Should she have ordered something else? Was a gin and tonic too much of a straight-girl drink? Should she have gotten something with bourbon or a beer or even a cider instead? Was the bartender, the one with the ripped T-shirt and tons of tattoos, whom Taylor was talking to right now, going to roll her eyes when Taylor ordered it and say, Why are you here with someone who would order a gin and tonic?
Well. Then Taylor would just say, I’m not here with her. We’re just friends. And the bartender would laugh and say, Obviously, I should have known.
Avery looked away from the bar and tried to shake her insecurities off. She was here because she wanted new experiences, remember? She was at a burlesque show at a lesbian bar! Those were both brand-new experiences!
She looked around at the crowd. She felt kind of nervous, sitting up here at a table in front all alone, but it was excellent for people watching. Some people here were casually dressed, but she could tell that quite a few had dressed specifically for this event, in outfits they wanted the world to see. They’d put care into what they were wearing, matched their pink lipstick with their pink highlights just so, put on that cute pair of shoes they’d been waiting for a chance to wear. The women in these outfits had clearly chosen them to give themselves a boost, to make themselves happy, to feel good in that dress that showed all that cleavage, in that peacock eye makeup that they’d watched dozens of tutorials to figure out how to do, in those studded combat boots they’d saved up for and finally splurged on.
Did she ever dress like that? Just to please herself, to show off a part of herself that she liked, to make herself feel attractive, to pump herself up? She had her various self-imposed uniforms that she wore for work, but that didn’t count; that was all to make herself feel professional and competent, or make her clients trust her, which usually worked. But outside of work, her clothes were mostly boring, conservative, to make herself blend in with the world. This sundress was as adventurous as she usually got, and this was the first time she’d unbuttoned it at all. She should really buy some more fun clothes.
“One gin and tonic, with a lime,” Taylor said as she set Avery’s drink in front of her.
“Thanks,” Avery said. She took a gulp of the drink, partly because it was hot in here and the drink looked refreshing with that ice, and partly because she was still nervous. “Um, when does the show start, do you know?”
Taylor sat down with her own drink, which was also some sort of tall, iced thing, with lemon instead of lime. Avery didn’t know if Taylor had ordered her own straight-girl drink just to make her feel better, or if that’s the kind of drink she always ordered, but either way, it made her feel better.
“Technically in about five minutes, probably more like thirty minutes or so. We made surprisingly good time; I thought we’d get here just as the show started, but now we have time to relax.” She grinned at Avery again. “And we had time to get good seats.”
Avery narrowed her eyes at Taylor.
“I’m not sure if I like that look on your face. What is it about these seats? Is something bad going to happen to me?”
Taylor laughed.
“I love how suspicious you are. Can we please let the record show that you’re the one who wanted this table, not me? Anything that happens as a result of this is NOT my fault.”
Avery just put her head in her hands, and Taylor laughed harder.
“Okay, but no, really,” Taylor said, the laughter gone from her voice. “There can sometimes be an…audience participation element when you’re up front. If you don’t want to deal with that, which I imagine you don’t, we can move. It’s no big deal.” She patted Avery on the shoulder. “I promise.”
Avery was touched by the serious expression on Taylor’s face. She knew that Taylor meant it, that they could move to a table in the back, that Taylor wouldn’t make fun of her, would never bring it up again. She sat up straight.
“That’s okay,” she said. “Let’s stay here. If I’m going to do this, I’m going to do it all the way.”
Taylor’s hand slid down her shoulder and gripped her upper arm. She looked at Avery and smiled slowly.
“That’s my girl.” She dropped her hand, but the imprint of it was still on Avery’s skin. Avery smiled back at Taylor and felt a little burble of pride in herself.
“Also,” Taylor said. “This table is a great people-watching vantage point, and we need to take advantage of it. Let’s decide on who we think the hottest people in this room are—other than the two of us, obviously. Oh, and what our favorite outfits are tonight, because there are a lot of great ones.”
“Before I answer that first question, I need to know: Are you going to make me flirt with whoever I say the hottest people in the room are?” Avery asked.
Taylor shook her head slowly.
“Avery. When are you going to realize that I’m not going to make you do anything that you don’t want to do?”
Avery let out a sigh.
“No, I know. I do realize that. I’m just…paranoid, that’s all.” She tried to make herself relax and answered Taylor’s question. “Okay, your bartender friend is definitely one of the hottest people in this room.”
Taylor grinned knowingly.
“Roxy? You’re correct about that one. Okay, yes, she goes on the list. What do you think about Polka-Dotted Crop Top over there?”
Avery turned to her left and saw a woman with long, multicolored hair, wide-leg jeans, and the aforementioned polka-dotted crop top lean over and kiss another woman on the cheek. She tossed her hair back and laughed, and her friends laughed with her. She had a round little belly that poked out between her crop top and her jeans; Avery envied her whole attitude.
“Hot, yes,” Avery said, “though not my type. I mostly just want to be friends with her.”
“Hmm, that raises a question that I’ve been meaning to ask you,” Taylor said. “What is your type?”
Avery bit her lip.
“Great question.” She was stalling. But she didn’t know how to answer. Partly because the only thing she was absolutely sure about was that her “type” included Taylor.
“If you don’t really know, that’s all right,” Taylor said. “But, okay, do you like women more femme, like you, or toward the butch end of the spectrum, or—”
“Not like me,” Avery said. “But also, um…”
Taylor lifted a hand to stop her.
“Actually, wait, here’s a better way to do this. Okay, we agree that Roxy is hot; I think you’ll agree with me that Leather Skirt to your left is hot as hell?”
Avery glanced in that direction and her eyes widened.
“Wow, yes, I do agree with you.”
Taylor smirked and nodded.
“Excellent. Okay, what about Pink Mesh Dress over by the bar?”
Avery looked at the tall, thin, brown-skinned woman with short blond hair and shook her head.
“Very attractive, obviously, but not my type.”
Taylor nodded again.
“These are good data points. How do you feel about Ripped Jeans and Black Muscle Tee by the door?”
Avery turned again, and a slow smile spread over her face. Taylor laughed.
“Well, there’s my answer.”
Oh God, was she that obvious? Avery looked down at her drink. But then she made herself look up at Taylor, whose eyes were fixed on her. She grinned, and Taylor grinned back.
“She’s so hot I can barely look at her,” Avery said, which made Taylor giggle.
“I think I may already know the answer to this question,” she said, “but how about Rainbow Petticoats over there?”
Avery swung her head in that direction.
“Beautiful, but not for me. But wait, why am I the only one answering these questions? What about you? What’s your type?”
Taylor laughed.
“Oh, I have too many types. I think all of these people are hot, that’s the problem.”
Avery opened her mouth to ask another question, when a rumble went through the crowd.
Taylor glanced up at the stage and took another sip of her drink.
“Show’s about to start.” Apprehension must have shown on Avery’s face, because Taylor then gestured to Avery’s drink. “You ready for this? Should I have made that a double?”
Avery laughed and shook her head.
“Absolutely not, to both questions.”
Why had Taylor brought Avery to this show tonight? She was already intensely sexually frustrated from this fucking bet with Erica, so why did she come up with the brilliant idea to (a) tell Avery to wear something risqué, (b) come to a place where she knew many hot women would be hanging out, and (c) also where a number of said hot women would be some of her exes with whom she’d had very excellent sex in the past? Any one of those things could have easily set her off; all that combined made her want to explode.
She couldn’t exactly regret this, though. Because hanging out here with Avery was just…fun. The car ride, the people watching, the conversation. To be true to their mission, Taylor probably should have encouraged Avery to go up to the bar to order a drink from Roxy, or beckoned her ex Gillian and her crowd over so Avery could try to flirt with them. But even though that was what she’d planned to do tonight, she didn’t want to push Avery. She wanted this to be fun for Avery, too, after all.
The lights went down, and a big cheer went up throughout the bar. Taylor let out a huge “Wooooo-ooooo-,” and Avery giggled. Taylor pursed her lips at her.
“I’m a very enthusiastic audience member, okay? No performer is ever going to say they had a bad audience on a night I was there.”
Avery nodded, a smile on her face.
“I can see that,” she said.
A dancer ran out onto the makeshift stage, and the cheers got louder. She was in a skintight sparkly red catsuit, with matching sparkly red lipstick, and a very large hot pink wig. The audience laughed and cheered through her opening number, and then three more dancers ran onstage to join her. Taylor paid enough attention to know when to cheer, but she mostly watched Avery’s reactions. At first, her smile looked tentative, obligatory, one that would fool most people that it was real, but not Taylor, at least not anymore. She could tell Avery was still nervous about whether her front-row seat would force her to be a part of the show. But when one of the performers made an extremely off-color joke, a half-horrified and half-delighted laugh burbled out of Avery, and Taylor laughed along with her.
It wasn’t until the fourth number that it happened. One of the performers, known only as the Goddess, who had on a bunch of expertly draped feather boas, stepped off the “stage” and greeted the four people sitting at the closest table.
“Hellooo, don’t you look sexy tonight!” She took a step back and looked each of them up and down. “Oh yeah, at least two of you are dressed to hook up later. The other two…hey, maybe you’ll get lucky.” The crowd laughed, and the people at the table joined in—though Taylor noticed that they all looked around at one another, clearly wondering which of them she’d been talking about. The performer patted one woman on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, baby, you know you’ve got this in the bag.” She moved on, while the woman at the table blushed but also preened a little.
“Now, who is going home with who tonight?” the Goddess asked a table of three. “Or, maybe all three of you are going home together, and if so, more power to you!”
She wandered around the audience doing her patter with the crowd, and Taylor felt Avery tense up next to her. She felt guilty for a moment that she hadn’t moved them to another table under the guise of introducing her to some of her friends so Avery wouldn’t have to do this, but she reminded herself that this had been Avery’s choice.
“Oohhhhhh,” the Goddess said, an arch tone in her voice. Taylor looked up, but she had her eyes on Avery. “I think I’ve found the person I’ve been looking for all night.”
Avery cleared her throat.
“Me?” she asked. Taylor felt unreasonably proud of her. There was no nervousness in her voice, her posture was as upright and ramrod straight as usual, and she’d even managed to have some of that same archness in her voice that the Goddess had in hers.
“Yes, you, oh yes indeed,” the Goddess said. She looked Avery up and down in the same way she’d done to the other table, except the look on her face was even more lascivious, if that were possible. “I think you’re just who I need to help me. You see, you look very competent, like you always know what you’re doing, like you’ll be honest with me, no matter what, and that’s just the kind of person I need right now. Can you help me?”
Taylor touched Avery’s elbow, trying to communicate to her that Avery could always say no and that she didn’t have to do this if she didn’t want to. Avery patted her hand without looking at her, and then smiled up at the Goddess.
“I’d love to,” she said.
Taylor tried to hide her smile. This was going to be entertaining.
“It’s my costume,” the Goddess said. “It’s a new one, and I’m not quite sure about it.”
Avery looked her up and down, almost as boldly as the Goddess had done. This time Taylor couldn’t keep the grin off her face.
“What aren’t you sure about?” Avery asked. “I love a boa.” She turned to the crowd. “Don’t you all love a boa?” The crowd cheered, and Avery grinned. She was getting the crowd on her side, amazing. Taylor knew she was beaming at Avery like she was a proud dance mom whose kid had won a pageant, but she didn’t even care.
The Goddess grinned back at Avery.
“I also love a boa; as a matter of fact, as you can see, I love boas, plural. But are you sure this isn’t…too many boas?”
Avery shook her head.
“Impossible. You can never have too many boas.”
Taylor laughed out loud. Avery met her eyes for just a second and gave her a tiny smirk before she looked back at the Goddess. Incredible. Avery was actually enjoying this, despite her anxiety earlier.
People in the crowd shouted, “Yes, girl,” “She’s right,” and “Love the boas.” But then someone in the back yelled, “Take it off!” which turned into a full-blown chant.
“Take it off, take it off, take it off!”
The Goddess looked at the crowd, then back at Avery.
“You hear what the people say. I think I need to take at least one off, or they’ll be so disappointed. So I need your help to decide which color to take off.”
Oh no. Taylor could see where this was going. At this point all she could do was sit back and hope Avery wouldn’t be so mortified that she would literally sink into the floor. So far, however, she was doing great.
Avery sat back and surveyed the Goddess again, so Taylor looked her over, too. The boas were in every color of the rainbow, along with a gold one and a silver one. She had no idea which one Avery would pick, or why.
“I think the silver one,” Avery said. “Gold is really more your color than silver.”
The Goddess gasped dramatically, and Taylor could tell Avery was trying hard not to grin. She, of course, succeeded; Avery was excellent at keeping a straight face.
“You know, I could choose to be insulted by that,” the Goddess said. “But you’re right—see, I knew I picked the correct person to help me. I really am more of a warm-toned person.” She reached for the silver boa, which was draped around her neck. “Now I need to take it off right now.” The Goddess paused and held out a hand to Avery. “Actually, this is very embarrassing, but I need your help to get it off. It’s attached back here, can you do it for me?”
“Of course.” Avery stood up, without a glance at Taylor. Taylor didn’t know if that was because she had no idea what was about to happen, or if she was already mortified and couldn’t look at Taylor for fear she’d burst into either laughter or tears.
No, not tears, Taylor couldn’t imagine Avery doing something so revealing as crying in public.
“It’s right…there,” the Goddess said as Avery disconnected the silver boa from the rest of them. “Perfect, you’ve got it. Here, let me make this easier on you.” And then the Goddess spun in a circle and the silver boa unraveled from around her neck. She plucked it up off the floor and draped it tenderly around Avery’s neck.
“Oh, that looks great on you,” the Goddess said. “Silver is definitely your color, even if it isn’t mine.” She looked down at herself and then frowned. “Hmm, but there’s still a problem. Hold on to this, will you?” She handed Avery the end of the gold boa, and then twirled faster and faster, as first the gold boa, then the red, then the pink, then the rest of them unraveled from her body. The crowd started clapping as the gold boa fell away, and got louder as the rest fell to the floor. When she was finally devoid of boas, the cheer was deafening. She faced Avery and shimmied back and forth, wearing just sparkly hot pants and bright blue tasseled pasties. The tassels at the ends of her substantial breasts swung back and forth and then around in a circle as she moved, and Taylor couldn’t help the giggle that came out of her mouth.
“There, now, isn’t this better?” she asked the crowd. The crowd cheered and hooted and called out “Swing those titties,” “Yesss, girl, yesss,” and “Tig ol’ bitties!” Taylor couldn’t help herself from yelling out, “Yeahhh, baby.” She saw the corners of Avery’s mouth twitch.
“What do you think, Ms. Thing?” the Goddess asked Avery. “Isn’t this better?”
Taylor had no idea how Avery would respond.
“Well, you know how much I love a boa, so I didn’t think it was possible to get better than what you had before, but…” Avery paused and looked from one tassel to the other. “That little loop de loop blew my mind.”
The Goddess shouted with laughter, kissed Avery on the forehead, pushed her back down into her seat, and shook her boobs in her face one last time for good measure. Avery’s cheeks were bright red, but she laughed and clapped for the Goddess along with the rest of the crowd as she gathered her boas—except for the silver one—back up and gave one more twirl with them before she disappeared.
Once another set of dancers had taken the stage and the attention of the crowd was off their table, Taylor looked over at Avery, who was staring at the stage with that silver boa still around her shoulders. Taylor touched Avery on the knee.
“Do you hate me for not making us change tables?” she asked under her breath.
Avery met her eyes and paused for a long few seconds, before she laughed out loud and shook her head.
“I could never hate you. I mean, yes, of course, I was completely mortified, but it was sort of fun?”
Taylor grinned at her.
“If it helps, I don’t think anyone else in this place had any idea that you were mortified. Other than me, I mean. You did a great job.”
Avery shook her head again.
“?‘Great’ might be overstating it, but as long as I didn’t embarrass myself, I’ll call it a win.”
Taylor threw an arm around her.
“Not only did you not embarrass yourself, but you surprised even me. I did not think you were going to go there with the tassel thing, and you did.”
Avery pulled the boa tighter around her neck with a wide smile.
“Okay, but, Taylor, I couldn’t help myself! Did you SEE the tassels swing in the little circle like that? How did she make them do that? That was total wizardry there!”
“That kind of thing is either years and years of training, or just sheer talent,” Taylor said.
They both laughed again, and then Avery picked up what was left of her drink.
“Um, I have one more question, and it’s a serious one,” she said.
Taylor sat back.
“Go for it,” Taylor said.
What was she going to ask? Something about why Taylor had brought her here tonight and was just hanging out with her instead of giving her flirting lessons, like they’d agreed on? Or if she was Taylor’s type? Or if they could leave right now and go back to Taylor’s place? Or…
Avery looked from side to side and lowered her voice.
“Do I get to keep this boa?”
Taylor dissolved into giggles.