Chapter 11
“Every monster has a story.
And the time has come to tell mine.”
Florian
Florian, five years old
Thunder echoes in the air, the wind whooshing inside and billowing the white curtains backward, and I jump up from the bed.
Running to the window, I sigh in pleasure at the chaos outside, and my feet itch to dart to the garden and open my arms wide, welcoming the rain along with the lightning flashing across the sky.
Grandpa Atlas says beauty should be valued above anything else because in beauty, we shall find inspiration and the desire to move forward. While his words seem a bit confusing…I believe them when I look at nature.
Rain. Snow. Oceans. Even…volcanoes.
All these natural outbursts are scary but so magnetic at the same time that I can’t imagine anyone staying indifferent toward it.
And that’s the thing I hate the most.
Indifference.
“Where have you been?” Daddy’s harsh voice rocks off the walls, and I still, curling my fingers on the windowsill. “We’ve searched for you everywhere.”
A melodic yet bored laughter follows his question, along with the heels clicking against the marble, slowly replacing the beauty in front of me and filling my insides with discomfort and pain.
“Out. Having fun.” I hear some stumbling, so she must be drunk and probably leaning on the wall now. “Something you have no idea about.” More laughter chills my blood because I know what she’ll say next.
She always says it whenever she stays outside for long and comes back reeking of alcohol and weird-smelling perfumes. “If you did, I probably wouldn’t have to go to another man to get it.”
“Watch your mouth, Elizabeth.”
“Jealous, Jacob?”
I can almost imagine the blank expression settling on Daddy’s features while disgust blankets his gaze. He never looks at her differently. “I don’t give a fuck what you do, Elizabeth, as long as it doesn’t affect my boys.” A beat passes. “It was an important night for them, and you missed it because you were fucking around with my cousin?”
I scrunch my eyes, covering my ears and not wanting to listen to them as their arguments usually mean some kind of heartbreak for me.
A rustling from my right snags my attention, and I glance toward the beds where my twin Frederick sits up, blinking the sleep away and frowning, cringing at the fight erupting outside.
We do it for different reasons, so I’m not surprised when he extends his hand to me. “Come here, Florian. Let’s put on headphones and sleep.” He throws his blanket away and pats the bed gently. Looking at the rain longingly one more time, I go to him.
But the voices just grow louder.
“Bellamy loves me! It should have always been him!”
“Take it to your father, darling. He’s the one who arranged this marriage.”
“I want a divorce!” she screams, and we hear some hitting sounds, which means she’s attacking Daddy. He usually just pushes her away but never hurts her.
He hates Mommy. They don’t even sleep in the same room and never did, according to the rumors. He only speaks to her whenever it has something to do with us, and even then, all their conversations end up like this.
They scream in the hallway in the middle of the night, where they think no one hears them when, in fact, the whole house does.
I know because the staff always whispers in the morning.
“Nothing is stopping you, darling. If you want a divorce, I’ll give it to you.” His chuckle is so hollow and cold. I jump on the bed and clench the blanket tight as Frederick wraps his arm around me. “Although I think my cousin will quickly lose interest in you once you don’t have my money to spend on him.”
More hitting follows. “You bastard!” She yelps, so Daddy must have pushed her away now. “I deserve my money.”
“What money, Elizabeth? Your father wrote you off his will once he learned about your affair, and you signed a prenup. Good luck trying to argue it in court.”
“Bellamy loves me.”
“No, Elizabeth. He hates me and uses you as a weapon against me. The minute you aren’t my wife, he’ll lose interest. Like he always does.”
“You’re wrong. And I’ll prove it to you.” Frederick and I glance at each other, both of us frowning because Mom has never said something like this before. “We will get married and build our little family. Bellamy, me, and Frederick.”
My heart pangs painfully in my chest, and Frederick’s arm flexes around me like he wants to shield me from our mom’s cruelty.
Although it’s pointless because she never hid her indifference toward me and her love for my fraternal twin. He looks exactly like her, while I’m the spitting image of our dad.
Which is funny because we are both blond and green-eyed, yet we are nothing alike.
Our mom continues, though, as if sending invisible daggers my way wasn’t enough. I’m not surprised. She never hides how much she hates me.
A hate she has to control because Dad cuts off her finances whenever she shows her true colors toward me.
He might take her bullshit. However, his patience never extends further when it comes to me, and he protects me from her viciously, and for this, he will always be my hero.
“I love my baby boy, and I’ll take you to court for custody! Bellamy has the money,” she yells, probably awakening the entire household. “You won’t be able to keep them both.”
Dad’s laughter probably can scare the dead. “He doesn’t work and soon won’t have even his inheritance left. And let’s not forget something, darling. I have all the evidence to prove your infidelity. No court will grant you custody. Believe me on this.”
“Let’s go to sleep,” Frederick whispers, forcefully pushing me on the pillow and covering us with the blanket while trying to turn on the music and put the headphones on me, but I slap his hand away. “Florian,” he whispers, his voice broken as he hates their arguments for one reason alone.
They always hurt me and leave a lasting impression, not to mention we become at odds with each other for days on end because we both know one simple truth.
He adores our mother and always defends her actions, trying to excuse her behavior. She’s all smiles, hugs, and warm conversations with him and constantly takes him on various trips while proudly announcing to everyone he’s her son.
I’m left behind or dragged along while constantly being berated whenever Daddy finds out, and they have another shouting match.
Sometimes I shudder thinking about what would have happened to me if she married someone else and not Dad, who is the only one on my side in this household besides Grandpa.
They say the bond between twins is eternal, which is not true in my case. I’m closer to my friends than I am to my twin, and while I love him…I can never understand how he can be so clueless about Mom.
A child who is loved cannot understand the resentment of the one who’s constantly ignored, I guess.
“Why are you doing this, Jacob?”
“You know why, Elizabeth. I warned you not to go against me, and you chose a different path. I have no mercy for a woman who betrays me.”
“You never loved me. Youre incapable of loving anyone because you’re a Price man. Fucking around and cheating is what you all do. Great for a good time and disastrous when it comes to relationships.” She quotes what people usually say about the men in my family, and I wince, confused about what it means.
A lot of beautiful women surround Dad and Grandpa, eager for their attention, and while they get it from Grandpa…Dad ignores them all.
I once sneaked into his office to read some books and heard him talk to Padrino Lucian, who asked him why he wouldn’t just take one of these women up on their offers since Mom cheats on him anyway.
Our butler returned before he could answer, so I never found out why.
“A not-so-gentle reminder, Bellamy is a Price.” He chuckles when more hitting sounds echo through the space. “Truth is hard to accept, isn’t it?”
“I will find a way to divorce you.”
“You do that, darling. Meanwhile, if you ever miss any of Florian’s recitals again, you can forget about having access to my money in the future. We both know sustaining my cousin’s greed is a whole-ass job, so play by the rules.”
“I despise him. I wish he was never born.”
“Repeat this shit again, and you’ll be the one to regret being born.” His heavy footsteps follow his ultimatum, which means he’s done with her and has gone back to his room. After a while, so does she, the night becoming quiet once again sans the thunder outside.
I burrow deeper into the blanket, staring at the darkness as Frederick sighs heavily behind me, wrapping his arm around me and whispering, “Shhh, Florian.”
Ignoring him, I stare into the darkness while tears soak the pillow underneath my cheek. No matter how much I wish to pretend her words don’t hurt me…they do.
In ways I can never explain.
I close my eyes, and in a few beats, lulled by the rain and my twin’s steady breathing, I finally fall asleep.
Only to wake up in a nightmare.
Jimena
The loud club music echoes through the space as I lean back in my booth, welcoming the soft cushions surrounding me while scrolling through the tablet in search of some delicious desserts.
My gaze lands on the strawberry cake, and saliva fills my mouth, making me frown because I dislike it, but ever since my cravings started, strawberries are all I can think about.
This only sours my mood because it reminds me about another person who loves strawberries so much. His grandfather ordered them in bushels back in the day so he’ll always have them available at home.
The baby already takes after its father.
“You’re going to get me in trouble,” a soft voice next to me says, but despite the slight hesitation in her tone, I don’t miss the excitement hiding underneath it.
“If my brother says anything, tell him I corrupted your good nature and dragged you here against your will.”
She snorts. “I don’t think he’s going to believe that.” She sighs heavily. “And I don’t expect him to be understanding, all things considered.”
I would have shared her sentiment on the matter about the dinner we had earlier where Dad and Santiago had yet another fight about the past that ended up in him storming off God knows where. However, it’s such a common occurrence in our house, and I’ve gotten used to it, although he never left his wife behind.
That’s right, my brother, who avoided commitment and laughed at just the notion of marriage, got married last night.
Well…
If kidnapping his bride to use her in some revenge plot and blackmailing her to marry him by threatening to kill her father can be called getting married, that is.
The poor thing tried talking to us all, thinking we’d help her escape him, but no such thing happened, and they got hitched at the family church. Father Paul, who might as well be called our uncle since my father grew up with him, consecrated the union.
I believe she cursed us all, and my heart hurt for her at the moment, but family loyalty comes above anything else.
Besides…
The Four Dark Horsemen might be monsters who roam at night and sink their claws in whenever they deem necessary, but they would never force themselves on a woman. They have lines they don’t cross, and I believe he gave her a choice. For whatever reason, she chose to save her father, who hated her guts her whole life, but that’s a whole-ass other drama I’m not going to get into.
And while all these things might have still swayed me to help her out or try to reason with my brother… The minute I saw the look on his face when he spoke about her, I knew there would be no saving when it came to her.
Santiago became obsessed with her from the first glance in true Cortez fashion, and I know better than anyone to stand between a Cortez man and the woman he wants.
“Deep down, my brother is a softy,” I tell her, and amusement flashes in her green and brown eyes, each one a different color, and standing out against her porcelain skin framed by the dark silky locks.
She’s curvy and gentle, her melodic voice almost sounding like a constant lullaby, and based on the work I’ve seen, she is very talented when it comes to art.
She wouldn’t be called beautiful in the classical sense of the word. My blood still boils when I think about her stepsisters, who made fun of her looks for years. In my opinion, Briseis is a stunner. My brother couldn’t have picked a better bride, and she fits right into our crazy family.
“Maybe when it comes to you.” She cocks her head to the side. “Want to spill some secrets about your brother?”
“Nope,” I say and motion for the server to come to us. “We are very loyal to one another.” A beat passes. “Although you’re part of our family now.”
“Not for long,” she warns and glares at me when I laugh because she really thinks this whole thing is temporary. My brother would never let her go, and judging by the various hickeys on her neck, she doesn’t mind it much.
Like I said.
Not my drama to focus on.
“Are you ready to order?” the server, Emma, asks, and I nod. “What would you like? We have a special chocolate cake tonight.”
I swallow past the bile rising in my throat since chocolate makes me nauseous and shake my head. “I’d like a strawberry cake and strawberry milkshake.” Surprise flashes on her face, but she quickly schools her features and widens her smile. “And how about adding a strawberry ice cream to the mix?”
“Someone has a craving,” Briseis jokes, and I jerk at this, glancing her way and studying her but not seeing anything that might have implied she guessed I’m pregnant. “I’ll think some more,” she tells Emma, and after a nod, she disappears in the busy crowd.
The club is packed as usual, but somehow, the atmosphere no longer holds the appeal to me. In fact, it rubs at the festering wounds in my heart, still twisting me in knots about my one night here that changed everything.
And still…
No one knows.
Through the past two months, I tried countless times to reach Florian and talk to him alone, but he wouldn’t give me the time of day. It’s like his one single goal in life became dismissing me or being flat-out rude to the point of Santiago giving him a warning after one of his remarks.
He stopped coming over to our house, and Mom noticed, complaining that her only godson was acting like an ass, and of course, I avoided the Price mansion.
This earned me several concerned calls from my godparents and a straight-up nagging one from Grandpa Atlas.
One of the reasons I dragged Briseis here is because enough is enough. My brother would lose his shit and come here at some point once they tell him we are here, and his friends will be with him. Since Santiago’s focus fully belongs to his wife whenever she’s around, he won’t be paying much attention to me, and I can finally talk to Florian.
“Do you enjoy it?” Briseis’s question makes me realize I’ve zoned out on her, and she must notice because she sends a warm smile my way. “I asked about your college. Do you enjoy studying psychology?”
“Yes. The human mind is an interesting thing.” And it’s true even though my interests lean more toward criminal psychology and understanding why various serial killers do what they do.
I’ve done research over the years. How could I not, considering the dark four killed people left and right, but…still, it wasn’t enough. Besides, when one has no passion in life, you might as well pick a major that stirs some curiosity in your brain. Otherwise, these studies would be a boring chore.
“What about you? Do you love your art?”
Her cheeks heat, and she nods, playing with the napkin on her lap. “Yeah. In my art, I find an odd sense of peace. As if I belong, you know?”
I have no idea what it’s like to belong anywhere, least of all on a professional level, but I still manage to push. “Yeah. Mom can’t live without it either.”
She wouldn’t have any exhibitions during Santiago’s absent years, but she’d still lock herself up in her studio, where she’d paint and paint until she had no strength left.
Only to tear up all the paintings and start anew.
“Here is your order.” Emma places a strawberry cake, milkshake, and ice cream on the table. “If you’d like anything else, just let me know, Miss Cortez.”
“Thank you.” Grabbing the fork, I dip it into the cake and lift it to my mouth, groaning in pleasure when the sweet taste hits me. “Delicious.”
“That looks really good. I’ll have one as well, please.”
“Coming right away, Mrs. Cortez.”
Briseis flinches at the name, and I laugh again, which earns me another glare. “You’d have to get used to it, and besides, our name has a lot of perks. You’ll find out.”
“I doubt it. Your brother will get bored once he achieves whatever he wants, and then will divorce me.”
“Hate to break it to you, but the Cortezes have never had a divorce in their history.”
“What?”
“Yes. We are known for long-lasting love marriages, so I wouldn’t hold your breath for the divorce if I were you.”
Before she can reply, her eyes widen, and she gets up. “Lenora is here!” She rushes to the entrance, where I see a gorgeous redhead, her best friend. We invited her earlier, and she seemed really nice on the phone.
Watching them hug each other makes me miss my own best friend, and snatching the phone from my purse, I’m about to text her but freeze when a message flashes on the display.
Jimena Cortez, I know your secret.
This is Maxwell Price, by the way.
My brow furrows at this rather cryptic message coming from Florian’s second cousin, and an uneasiness rushes through me that I quickly temper.
While the Price family has complicated internal dynamics and relationships when it comes to Uncle Jacob’s cousin, who also happens to be Maxwells father, Bellamy, their conflict never affected us in any way.
I met him once when Bellamy came to our house with some business idea and asked Dad for funding to save his crumbling company. Dad refused, and even though Bellamy cursed him all the way, he remained nice toward Mom and me.
According to everyone, he married some rich heiress desperately in love with him, accepting his son from his previous marriage and raising him as her own.
She also dealt with his constant infidelities and forgave him every single time, even the sex video scandal a few years back.
Since she was her father’s only child and couldn’t have her own children, Maxwell became their dynasty’s heir by default, and right now, he’s on the ‘most sought-after bachelors in the world’ list.
Compared to his philandering alcohol-loving father, though, he has a brilliant mind and expanded the empire and the family’s influence.
Powerful, charming, handsome, and smart are just a few adjectives describing the man who earned the respect of his peers.
Although he still fucked his way through Chicago in true Price fashion.
We’ve never crossed paths. He tried relentlessly to mend his father’s relationship with Uncle Jacob and Florian, but both still dogged all his attempts without wanting to explain why.
I have no idea what you’re talking about. How do you have my number anyway?
It’s not hard to find. And I think you do.
I don’t appreciate rather elusive messages implying something coming from strangers.
Ah, so proper. I think you should be nicer to people who know your secrets.
I roll my eyes at the audacity and wrap my hand around my milkshake, pulling at the straw and enjoying the refreshing drink.
I’m starting to understand why my godfather dislikes you so much.
Obviously, this is a low blow, all things considered, but still. What he says sounds like a threat, and while a lot has been said about him, being kind and empathic wasn’t one of them.
If he wants something, he goes after it and uses any means necessary to achieve it.
Oh, so there is a character under all this perfect princess persona? I’m impressed, Jimena. You being such a doormat when it comes to my cousin made me question your sanity, but I’m happy to be proven wrong.
I place the milkshake back on the table with a loud thud, the sweet liquid splashing a little on my fingers while everything inside me goes still, and my heartbeat speeds up as panic creeps up on me.
I think I have your attention now, darling. So the secret I mentioned earlier? You’re pregnant. Which would have been shocking news in itself, but you’re pregnant with Florian’s baby.
My breathing speeds up, my hand squeezing around the phone while I will myself to stay calm and focus on the situation, racking my mind about where he could have found out the truth.
No one knows besides Luna, but she wouldn’t tell anyone.
Like I said earlier…it’s not hard to find out something. You paid the doctor generously for his silence, but you missed your chance with his secretary.
I can almost see the amused yet cold smile spreading his lips while his green eyes study me like I’m some kind of insect under him he’s ready to destroy.
Straightening up and exhaling heavily, I type my reply while already forming a plan to go to my doctor’s and rip his secretary a new one.
Let’s cut to the chase. What do you want?
Maybe I’m just writing to congratulate you on this blessing.
We both know you’re a shark who searches for blood. You found mine. So I repeat. What do you want?
He would not have sat on this information unless he wanted to use it against me somehow, or rather do his bidding, and I won’t act like some meek weakling.
He’s right, I’m a doormat when it comes to Florian, but that’s about it. And I’m so tired of hating myself for it, so I’m just going to forgive myself and move on with the sad fact.
I believe pregnancy is a sensitive matter, and the last thing I want is to cause any stress for you.
Was this supposed to sound sincere? Because you failed spectacularly.
Darling, you need to be careful, or I might like this fire of yours.
I’m not your darling.
That’s true because if you were, you’d already wear my ring and have the protection of my name. Something my dear cousin failed to do.
He clearly doesn’t hold back his punches.
We live in the twenty-first century, in case you missed it. I don’t need anyone’s protection. Besides, my family name provides me with everything.
Does it, darling?
I notice Briseis stopping by the bar as Lenora explains something to the bartender who nods at her and grabs a shaker, pouring different drinks into it. Which means I have around five minutes to finish this stupid conversation and school my features.
Briseis is very perceptive, and while she’s nice, she’s my brother’s wife, which means she can’t know anything important when it comes to me—for now.
Either tell me what you want or I’m going to block your number.
I wouldn’t do that if I were you. You do remember I know about your secret, right?
It won’t be a secret for long, and besides, blackmailing me will hardly accomplish anything. I don’t react to it well.
I’d say men in your family don’t react to it well. They are ruthless, cunning, and powerful. You’re none of those things. Hard to accept, I imagine.
This freaking guy has some nerve! The gloves are officially off.
It’s interesting how much you know about my family. I wonder if it’s natural curiosity or if you try to compensate for the fact that yours wants nothing to do with you. After all, they love us and despise you.
It’s probably the meanest thing I’ve ever said to someone, but my blood is boiling from all this, plus my nerves at the prospect of telling Florian the truth. Now I really have no choice and have to do it tonight.
Florian and Maxwell have some personal beef too, which exceeded that of their fathers. They are the same age and had a lot of fights back in school, and whenever they mingled in the same company, everyone gave them a wide berth.
The only difference between them is that Florian ended up in a tight group of friends while Maxwell stayed a loner most of the time, hiding his affections well.
I see your baby is already affecting your character. Acting like an asshole is in a Price’s blood.
Anger sparks up inside me because fuck him.
Watch it, Maxwell. Try to insult my baby again, and I’ll show you how ruthless I can truly be.
Relax, mama. I would have preferred to have this conversation in private, but I have a feeling you’ll refuse. Pity if you ask me.
Then it’s good I’m not asking.
Touché, darling.
I grit my teeth at the endearment, but my jaw drops at what he types next, my fingers freezing and hovering over the display as I blink several times, hoping I read it wrong.
Except I haven’t.
Let’s get married.
Have you lost your mind?
This is a rather rhetorical question since he’s known to act like a complete psycho most of the time, especially during takeovers.
Nope. This marriage will be beneficial for both of us. In more ways than one actually. If you’d like to discuss it further, we can meet up so you can understand my point more clearly.
I repeat, have you lost your mind? I’ve never spoken to you until now, and you’re proposing marriage? You think what? I might be pregnant, but I don’t need a husband, okay? So whatever stupid revenge plan against my uncle and Florian you have…find someone else to use for it. And FYI? I won’t keep this conversation a secret, and don’t bother blackmailing me. It won’t end well for you.
I have no time to read all that. I assume it’s a long form of no. Think about it, Jimena. Consider it a business arrangement between two parties who have one goal in mind.
We have no mutual goals. And if it’s some kind of a trick to get me into your bed…
I shudder at just the idea of him touching me.
You’re a beautiful woman, darling. I’m not into family double dipping, though. No offense.
Go to hell, Maxwell.
Hell is here on earth. Sooner or later, you’ll understand it, and when you do…you have my number. This proposition has an expiration date, though. I’ll give you three days to make up your mind.
Don’t hold your breath.
I block his number just as Briseis and Lenora reach our table, my hands still shaking from all the rage and fear, so it takes inhuman strength for me to grin at them. “Hi.” I get up and extend my hand to Lenora, who, to my surprise, hugs me closer, her flowery scent washing over me. “Nice to meet you in person.”
“Likewise. It’s always an aesthetic pleasure to study your outfits that complement your skin tone and enhance your beauty.” I blink at this, and she laughs. “I’m a future fashion designer, so it’s just my thing.”
“Thank you.” I motion at the booth, and they both slide to their seats. I see the crowd parting slightly, murmurs hushing through the space.
They’re here.
The minute the thought flashes in my head, my gaze finds Florian heading toward the elevators leading to their secret floor, and my stomach plummets because it means only one thing.
He’s about to sleep with someone else, and as humiliating as it might be, I have to tell him now. Especially with the other three going in different directions.
“I need to use the bathroom. I’ll be back,” I tell the girls and dart toward Florian, hiding in the crowd so my brother won’t notice me.
I have no time for his inquisitions.
It’s hard pushing through all the sweaty and hot bodies with a few guys sending me suggestive looks that I gently refuse since they don’t act like assholes and finally get out, quickening my step and exhaling in relief when I see no one around.
“Florian!” I call after him, making him freeze on his way to the elevators. He spins around, our gazes clashing, and the air hitches in my throat at the intensity in his eyes.
He’s so painfully handsome in his leather jacket and blue jeans along with leather boots emphasizing the danger and charm pouring from him in spades, and everything in me cries out to run to him, but I hold back.
He wants none of my affection, and goose bumps erupt on my skin when he glides his eyes over my form, unfamiliar heat flaring up in them only to be masked by indifference. I haven’t addressed him directly in the last couple months. “Jimena.”
Even my name sounds sinister on his mouth, dripping with longing and desire that must be all in my head because this man feels nothing for me but dislike.
How the mighty have fallen, the mighty being me because at least in the past, I had his brotherly affection.
“How are you, Florian?” The ridiculous question slips past my lips before I can stop it, and he raises his brow. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”
“We saw each other at the wedding last night.”
The AC buzzes loudly, and coldness nips at my flesh. I cross my arms and rub when fear envelops me, my mind finding the best words to start this life-changing conversation.
In all my dreams about love and babies, I never imagined telling the man I love I’m pregnant with his child while being in his club and him actively avoiding my entire existence.
“Right. But you know what I mean. I hate this awkwardness between us.”
Something crosses his face, but it’s gone so quickly I have no time to study it. “Maybe you shouldn’t have sneaked up in my club and pretended to be someone else so I could fuck you.” I flinch at his detached tone and the crude way he describes what happened between us, shattering any remaining illusions my stupid heart might have had. “If that’s all…”
Self-preservation screams at me to get away from him and his scrutiny because for my whole life, he has been my safe, warm harbor that accepted me with all my flaws and loved me anyway.
Who provided a container for all my pent-up emotions and allowed me to express them without judging me.
Who always found time for me no matter how busy he was and protected me sometimes from myself and my intrusive thoughts that made me wonder about dark things.
Florian was my salvation…why did my love turn him into my damnation?
He resumes his walk to the elevator, snapping me out of my stupor, and I will all my courage and bravery to withstand whatever reaction he’d give me. “I need to talk to you.”
He presses the elevator button. Coldness coats his voice when he replies, causing the disgusting tremor to rush down my spine as if alerting me about the upcoming blow, except I have no choice but to stay glued to the place. “Too bad. My plans for tonight don’t include you.”
I rub my arms some more while bile rises in my throat, understanding the implication in his words at once and wincing because it physically pains me to hear him say that.
I love him.
My whole life, I loved no one but him, and even if he doesn’t love me…why does he have to be so cruel to my heart? Is it such an offense to have someone love him?
He punishes me like I’ve committed a crime.
I straighten my back and internally congratulate myself for keeping my own voice even. “It’s important, Florian. The night we spent together two months ago—”
He doesnt let me finish, interrupting me right away. “Means nothing to me.” I pale at this, and my nails cut into my skin as I welcome the hurtful sensations grounding me to the present and not letting me be consumed by my grief.
“I know. You made that absolutely clear.” I twist my hands together and continue to talk, barely pushing the words out while gulping for deep breaths. He probably sees how hard it is for me, but I’m past caring. The only thing that matters is confessing the truth because that’s the right thing to do. I don’t ever want to be accused of stealing his child from him. “There is something you should know.” I take several steps toward him.
His icy chuckle echoes off the walls, and he tangles his fingers in his hair before spitting out, “I’ve never had someone cling to me so much after sex.” I freeze, and he tips my chin up so our eyes meet while he leans closer, his scent wrapping around me and suffocating me because absolute fury coats it. “No one is attracted to desperate, and you, darling, reek of it.” He glances at the platinum watch on his wrist and announces, “I have a threesome waiting for me. Unless you don’t mind joining me? You can stay and watch if you want.” He taps on my nose. “Might learn a thing or two.”
I slap him hard, my palm bouncing off his cheek and leaving a red imprint on his skin. I hope it fucking hurts like hell, although it would pale compared to the gaping wound he just inflicted on me.
Florian’s jaw tics, but otherwise, he shows no outer reaction while I breathe heavily, each of my words steelier than the previous one. “Did you really think I’d want to be with you after you ran away like a coward? How delusional could you be?” I dig my finger in his chest. “News flash, darling, no dick on this planet is good enough to make me a doormat. Especially not yours.” I flip my hair back, the locks falling over my shoulder, while smoothing down my red summer dress.
All this time, I’ve punished myself for falling in love with my brother’s best friend and allowed him to convince me I’m some kind of criminal for daring to do so.
But you know what?
He was a willing participant in all of this, and I’m sick and tired of him acting as if I somehow corrupted him.
My love is not a poison just because he doesn’t want it, and I’m done coming up with excuses for him.
Florian has a heart. Its too bad that it turned out to be rotten and ruthless, just like his sadistic nature.
“I’m pregnant. I thought you deserved to hear it from me. So now, sincerely, go fuck yourself, Florian.”
I don’t give myself time to study his shocked expression or wait for more bullshit to spit from his mouth.
I turn around and march back to the table, focusing only on my rage; otherwise, the pain and blood seeping from the invisible wound in my heart would destroy me.
Once upon a time, I researched love, craving to know how this process works because my forbidden crush seemed so dirty and unattainable.
According to scientists, we fall in love due to smells, hormones, and other chemical processes happening in our body, while the romantics describe these incredible emotions as swiping you off your feet where all you can think about is this particular person.
And while everyone has a different opinion, what most people agreed on was this.
We don’t control who we love. It just happens.
I can’t control my love for Florian. It can’t just vanish in thin air after years of pining and now carrying his child.
This feeling of mine, though?
It won’t rule over me anymore, urging me to do stupid shit in hopes of him changing his mind and finally seeing me.
I’ve spent my whole life fighting for everyone to see me and failed.
I no longer wish to do so.
Love is either freely given or has no point at all. Can you really be happy if you’re exhausted from fighting for it all the time?
Florian was right.
Unrequited love is an illusion.
And mine just finally crashed and burned.