Chapter 12
Murray took a bit longer than was strictly necessary at the coffee machine. He faffed around loading the puck and tamping it down carefully. Anything to buy himself a bit of time before he had to turn around and face her again.
He was feeling… flustered. It wasn’t a word he’d ever used to describe himself before, but right now, it seemed pretty fitting.
Milly looked far too adorable in his shorts and tee shirt. No one should look that beautiful wearing borrowed gear and sporting tangled, towel-dried hair. The sight of her was making him weak at the knees. Or at least – he thought it was Milly making him feel like that. It might be the head injury, of course!
Frankly, finding the woman of his dreams stuck in the mud right outside his home had been the medicine he didn’t know he needed. Murray had barely given his aches and pains a second thought since he’d ushered her inside the trawler… other than to register the nervous, swooping sensations in his stomach.
‘Frothy milk?’ he said over his shoulder, not turning to actually meet her eye in case he lost control of himself completely and did something idiotic – like pledging his undying love.
‘Oooh yes please!’ she said.
Huh – so it wasn’t just the sight of her that made him feel all… flippy. The sound of her voice was enough to make him feel like he had an entire rainforest of butterflies having a party in his stomach too.
Murray swallowed and then turned back to the machine, sending super-heated steam bubbling into the milk with a strangled hiss.
He knew just how that felt!
At least the noise gave him an excuse not to speak for a few seconds. He was having a hard time trying to figure out how to make small-talk with the goddess sitting right behind him. He just needed a couple of seconds to pull himself together.
‘Sugar?’ he said when the milk was so frothy it was threatening to climb right out of the jug.
‘No thanks.’
Damnit. He was out of excuses not to turn around and face her!
Filling the mug to the brim with the creamy concoction, Murray picked it up and turned slowly on the spot - only to find himself pinned by her eyes. Milly didn’t look any more comfortable than he felt.
Come on man – you’re the host here – say something to make her relax!
‘Here,’ he said, popping the coffee down in front of her and then fidgeting from foot to foot.
Great. Nice job!
Murray winced. Had he always been such a sarcastic asshat inside his own head? He desperately wanted to sit down. The room was suddenly a bit swimmy.
‘Thanks,’ said Milly, not taking her eyes off him. ‘Are you… erm… going to sit?’
Ah… so she was a mind reader. That was bad news!
‘Sit? Yes, good plan,’ he muttered, feeling increasingly awkward – though he wasn’t entirely sure why.
Maybe it had something to do with the fact that the object of his desire had turned up out of nowhere, been naked in his shower, and was now sitting in his kitchen, wearing his clothes. Or maybe it was because they’d only shared about five words before the most memorable kiss of his life… and then not spoken again for a year and a half.
‘You’re looking a bit pale,’ she said with a worried frown.
‘Didn’t sleep too well in hospital,’ he mumbled, scrunching his eyes closed in an attempt to make the room stay still. It didn’t help. He quickly sank down into the chair opposite Milly. Better to sit down before he fell down, after all!
‘I bet,’ said Milly, shooting him a look that was both sympathetic and – for some reason – full of guilt. She pulled her coffee towards her and cradled it in her hands.
‘Are you cold?’ he said.
‘I’m fine, thanks,’ said Milly, shaking her head. ‘But seriously though – are you okay? After the… erm… accident, I mean.’
‘I’m fine,’ he sighed.
‘That’s not what everyone’s been saying and I’ve been so worried!’ she said, her words tripping over themselves. ‘That’s why I’m here, in case you’re wondering. I wanted to apologise.’
‘What on earth for?’ said Murray, raising his eyebrows – then wishing he hadn’t. That hurt! ‘And… what’s everyone saying?’
He wasn’t sure he really wanted to know… but perhaps it was better coming from Milly than finding out the next time Josh left an obnoxious message on his answering machine.
‘I’m sorry about the flowers,’ said Milly, scrubbing at her face. ‘I mean – I know how heavy that bouquet was. It’s what Elizabeth wanted… but they should have come with a health and safety warning or something and…’
Murray held up a hand and shook his head. ‘Milly – seriously,’ he chuckled, ‘there’s no way it was your fault.’
‘But I—’
‘Nope!’ said Murray, cutting across her.
‘The flowers—’
‘Nope!’ said Murray again.
Milly’s worried expression morphed into a grin, and for a second Murray basked in the fact that he’d put that smile on her beautiful face.
‘Okay then,’ she said. ‘Well… thanks. And I am sorry you got hurt. Bet you’ll be forever traumatised by the sight of hand-tied flowers after that!’
‘Honestly?’ said Murray. ‘I don’t remember much about it.’
‘Huh. Well… brace yourself for a few different versions because most of the town’s talking about it,’ said Milly.
‘They are?’ he said on a groan. It shouldn’t really surprise him, given Brian’s report about the whole thing in the taxi earlier on.
‘Yep. In fact – several of them are hunting for your missing teeth like they’re some kind of weird-ass trophy,’ said Milly. ‘Makes me think of those serial-killer documentaries!’
‘My teeth?’ said Murray in confusion.
‘There’s a rumour going around they got knocked out when you went down!’ she said, scrunching up her nose. ‘Jo – my trainee – asked if she could have a longer lunch break to join the hunt for them.’
‘Gross!’ chuckled Murray. ‘Also pointless. No teeth were harmed in the making of this disaster.’
‘Really?’ said Milly.
‘Yep,’ he said, giving her a wide toothy grin to prove the point.
‘Well… that’s something,’ said Milly. ‘And no blood?’
‘Nope,’ said Murray. ‘Just a slightly disappointing bump on my head and a great big dollop of embarrassment.’
‘Don’t be embarrassed,’ said Milly. ‘It’s not like it was your fault!’
‘Erm… well… it is a little bit,’ he said.
‘How?’ demanded Milly.
‘I was distracted,’ he muttered.
‘Right… well, it was very busy,’ said Milly.
Murray nodded and sighed. He should stop talking. He’d already made a big enough prat out of himself in front of her. He didn’t need to confirm the levels he was prepared to stoop to when she was around, did he?!
But then… she was sitting right there in front of him.
He might as well own up to the full, excruciating truth of the situation while he had her undivided attention. After all, he had to face facts – he’d probably never get the chance to talk to her again after this. Why would someone like her want anything to do with him?!
‘I wasn’t paying attention because I was looking for you,’ he said bluntly.
‘Me?’ said Milly, clearly surprised.
‘Yes… in the crowd.’
Why? Why couldn’t he have just let this go?
‘Oh,’ said Milly.
‘In fact,’ he said, preparing himself for abject humiliation, ‘you were pretty much the only reason I agreed to have anything to do with the wedding.’
‘Me?’ she said again, shaking her head slightly.
‘You,’ he agreed. ‘I knew you were doing the flowers, and I knew you’d been invited. I wanted to see you… again. After… well… I don’t know if you remember but… again.’
He was making a real pig’s ear out of this, wasn’t he?
Murray paused and cleared his throat. Poor woman. She was going to leg it off the trawler before she’d even drunk her coffee if he wasn’t careful. Mud be damned!
‘Anyway,’ he said, ‘it didn’t work out quite the way I’d planned.’
‘What did you have planned?’ she said quietly.
‘I was hoping we might at least get to dance,’ he said, feeling his face grow hot as he met her eyes. ‘Instead, I got to ride in the back of an ambulance… and I don’t even remember it. If only I’d stayed inside and gone over my speech, none of it would have happened. Maybe we’d have…’
Murray trailed off. He’d said way too much already. Milly was now fidgeting in her chair and picking at the handle of her coffee cup.
Great, he’d made her feel uncomfortable.
This was why he’d left it so ridiculously long to talk to her again. Why he’d never summoned the courage to do something about his monumental crush. To say he wasn’t good at small talk was an understatement.
Letting out a sigh of defeat, Murray hauled himself out of the chair again and headed back to the coffee machine. He didn’t really want another drink… but it was better than sitting in awkward silence across from Milly while he waited for her look of mild confusion to morph into one of horror.
‘You are kidding me… right?’
Milly’s voice made him turn in surprise. She had a strange look on her face. Quizzical… but definitely not horrified. In fact, she looked like she was caught somewhere between surprise… laughter and… hope?
‘Kidding about what?’ he said, wondering if maybe those flowers had done more damage than the scans had revealed. What if this was one of the side effects they’d told him to look out for – a hallucination, perhaps? Maybe the girl of his dreams – sitting in his kitchen, wearing his clothes after taking a shower in his bathroom – was just a figment of his imagination. A symptom of a good thrashing by a bunch of daisies.
It certainly seemed a lot more plausible than Milly rowing all the way out to the trawler to check he was okay. Of course, if she was just a phantom who was about to disappear in a puff of smoke, it would be safe to tell her. After just one kiss, he’d fallen in love with her - a perfect stranger.
‘Earth to Murray!’ said the phantom gently.
‘Huh?’’ he mumbled, swaying on the spot.
‘Murray?’ the phantom got to her feet, looking a bit freaked out. ‘I think you’d better sit down!’