Chapter 1 #2
“Thank you,” I say, ending the call. Mrs. Ward has been a godsend.
I hate having to travel on the weeks when I have Camden, but I’m a professional athlete, and that’s just the nature of the job.
Having a nanny we trust and who loves my son is a huge weight off my shoulders.
He loves her, just as if she were his grandma.
I oftentimes feel guilty that my parents live so far away, but they visit often, and their lives are in Philadelphia, where I was born and raised.
Besides, they’re traveling the world, living their best life, and I love that for them.
I know it’s my issue. I have so much guilt over the way Natasha is with Camden.
I feel guilty that it’s her who’s my son’s mother.
That’s what it boils down to. I want better for him.
Fuck. A therapist would have a field day with me.
Knowing that if I lie here, I’m going to fall asleep, I force myself to stand and make my way to the upstairs laundry room.
My primary bedroom is downstairs, and there are four additional bedrooms and a loft upstairs.
I bought this house after Natasha told me she was pregnant.
I knew my child needed a yard to play in.
I freaked out the first night I brought him home with me.
His room was upstairs, and I was downstairs.
Single-dad life is tough. I slept on a pile of blankets on his bedroom floor.
The next day, I ordered furniture for one of the spare rooms to use as my own, as well as a bassinet for him to sleep close to me in my room for a few months.
The sales clerk tried to talk me into one of those bed things that attach to my bed, but I was afraid I’d somehow roll over on him.
I’ve read the books, and they all advise against it, so a bassinet right next to my bed was pretty much the same thing, except it had four sides instead of three and wasn’t attached to my bed.
He’s going to be two in two months, and he sleeps soundly in his own bed, in his room, but I’m still sleeping in the guest room upstairs.
Half of my clothes are downstairs, and half are upstairs.
I keep telling myself that he’s old enough now, and that I can sleep in my room, but I’ve yet to change it.
Mrs. Ward just smiles and tells me that I’ll know when the time is right.
Her room is down the hall next to Camden’s.
I’ve offered to let her move into my suite on the first floor, but she refuses.
She’s earned her own space, having to deal with both Natasha and me.
Mostly Natasha, but I might as well toss my name into the hat, too.
I’m sure I have my moments when I’m tired and cranky and have to deal with Natasha. Mrs. Ward is a saint in my eyes.
Grabbing the baby monitor, I peek in on Camden before quietly making my way downstairs.
Once it’s on, I place it on the kitchen island and tackle unloading the dishwasher.
I could pay someone to do this for me, and I do.
I have someone who comes in and cleans once a week.
During the season, I don’t have time, and when not in season, if I’m not at the gym, I’m spending time with Camden.
My mind always goes to Bellamy, Reid’s wife, and how she resented her father for choosing his career.
I never want my son to feel that way. I don’t know the whole story where Bellamy is concerned.
In fact, we were all shocked to find out she was our coach’s daughter.
Hell, we didn’t even know Coach had a daughter.
Regardless, Camden is my priority and always will be.
After closing the dishwasher, I wipe down the counters and sweep the kitchen floor. Camden is in this “let me put everything in my tiny hands so I can put it in my mouth” stage. I have one of those automatic sweeper things, but I still find myself sweeping most days, even after it has run.
By the time I’m done, Camden is chatting away in his bed, and I smile. Little man is up, and it’s time to head to the get-together. I’m sure everyone will be thrilled to see that he’s with me. We all miss him when he’s gone, but lately, that’s not very often.
As I make my way upstairs, I try to remember the last time it’s been a whole week that I didn’t see my son, and it’s too far back for me to remember. Have I ever? Maybe once or twice when he was a newborn.
Fucking Natasha.
I love that I’m getting more time with him, but damn her for her blasé attitude about motherhood. He deserves so much more than what he’s getting from her. I smile when I see my little man standing in his bed, one leg propped up on the railing, ready to make his escape.
“All right, Houdini.” I chuckle, walking into his room.
“Daddy!” He squeals with delight, and my heart melts.
“I’m here to rescue you,” I tell him, lifting him out of his crib. He wraps his little arms around my neck and hugs me. “Daddy loves you.”
“Wove ooh,” he says.
“Mommy’s gotta work, so we’re going to go to Uncle Landry and Aunt Rowan’s house. You ready to see everyone?” I ask him.
“Baby.”
I grin as I place him on the changing table to change his diaper before we go. “That’s right, baby Coral will be there. Let’s get your butt changed, and we’ll head out.”
“Butt!” he says, and I grimace. I keep forgetting that he repeats or at least tries to repeat everything I say. I’ve cleaned up my mouth for the most part. I guess in the grand scheme of things, it could have been worse. I could have said ass.
“There you go,” I tell him, pulling his shorts back up and placing him on the floor.
I grab the diaper bag and toss in some extra diapers, because you can never be too prepared.
Check the wipes, make sure we have some toys, his swim trunks, and a couple of extra outfits—just in case—along with pajamas I can change him into before we leave.
Because once he’s in the truck after playing all evening, he’ll be lights out.
It’s a trick I learned along the way. Never wake a sleeping baby to change their clothes.
Just let them sleep in whatever it is until they wake up on their own.
I grab his favorite blanket from his crib and shove it in the bag, too, before tossing it over my shoulder.
“All right, little man. Let’s hit the kitchen for a sippy cup and some snacks.
” I scoop him up into my arms. I know Landry will have milk there for him, and he has his own drawer of snacks that he can reach.
All of my friends spoil him rotten, and I love that he has them.
Ten minutes later, with a stuffed diaper bag sitting on the floorboard, Camden is strapped into his car seat, and we’re on the road.