Foolish Pride (The Last Best Place For Love #5)

Chapter 1

ELLIE

The loudest quiet ever is the shattering of a heart being broken.

I couldn’t remember where I had heard that phrase before and I could be misquoting it, but it was so true. I nodded my thanks to JR as I picked up my martini and drank back half the glass, doing my best not to stare at Liam and his wife, my former friend, Bailey.

I should never have gone along with his stupid plan. Yes, it helped him, but it broke my heart and cost me a friend in the process. The guilt of it all was overwhelming, and people around town still thought I had slept with Liam.

How little they knew.

Those few kisses in the bar meant more to me than anyone would ever know, but to him, I was nothing more than a means to an end. He felt nothing when his lips were on mine. Those hands that roamed over my body so easily felt like they were memorizing a path for the future.

Sadly, they didn’t care at all.

Every grope, every caress was nothing more than a man doing everything possible to save the woman he loved.

News flash, I was not that woman.

I never would be. Not for any man, and not because I wasn’t pretty or was boring. But because there was something defective about me, every man within a hundred-mile radius could sense it.

I tossed back the rest of my drink, nearly spilling it when Josie bumped into me as she sat on the stool next to me.

She was one of my only friends who hadn’t abandoned me when the whole town turned on me and called me a whore.

Maybe it was in her nature—after all, she did run the apothecary shop in town.

Or maybe she was just the type of friend who stood by you through thick and thin.

“Okay, you can’t drink like that. Then JR will have to drive you home, and trust me, he’s not the happiest person when dealing with drunk people.”

“I’m not drunk,” I argued. “I’m pleasantly tipsy.”

“Tipsy or not, I’m cutting you off.”

I gasped at her, “You’re not serious.”

“Oh, I am so serious. Girl, there is no way I can ask JR to haul you out of here. Besides, my brother is at it again. I can’t worry about two of you.”

I spun on my stool and stared at the darkest corner of The Beaver and Boot, sighing heavily when I saw my good friend drowning his sorrows in a bottle of brandy.

“Who was it this time?”

“Marissa.”

“From town?” I thought hard for a face to go with the name, but nothing came up.

“Nah, she’s off this dating site he’s trying.”

“Given up on just the natural meet and greet, huh?”

“I think he’s gone through all the women in town who would possibly date him.”

Sighing, I shook my head. “He’s such a good guy. I don’t get why women don’t like him.”

She nudged me playfully. “You know, you might—”

“Don’t even go there. I’ve been around his moping one too many times. There’s no way I could date the man after I’ve held his hand while he cried. Besides, he needs someone like him.”

“A crier?”

“Someone sensitive. Someone who loves just as hard as he does.” I turned and smiled at him. “An optimist. And I am most definitely short on optimism these days.”

“Yeah, well, if he doesn’t find Mrs. Right soon, his liver is gonna fail.”

I turned and waved down JR—my new best friend. “Another!”

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough?”

I plopped my chin in my hand, grinning up at him. “Not nearly enough. I can still make out the bar clearly, and every time I look toward the windows, my heart breaks. So, unless you want to hear my sad, sad tales, pour me another.”

He was on it faster than any bartender I’d ever seen. If there was one thing a man never wanted to hear, it was about a woman’s broken heart. And JR was the least likely to sit around listening to my woes. The only woman he tolerated was his wife. Other than that, he was kind of a loner.

“You know, you really need to do something to get over Liam,” Josie whispered. “He’s married.”

“I’m well aware.”

“But you’re still pining for him.”

I sighed heavily. She just didn’t get it, and she never would. “The heart wants what the heart wants.”

JR slid my drink in front of me, narrowing his eyes as if to warn me. Warn me about what, I wasn’t sure.

“You know, you never told me what really happened with him.”

“Yes, I did. In fact, I told you everything.”

“Everything except how you ended up with the life-altering, forlorn love.”

Yeah, I hadn’t mentioned that part. “Just call me Susy-come-lately. It’s the age-old tale of man meets woman. Man falls for woman. But another woman fell in love at the same time, only he never knew.”

“You never told him?”

“When?” I snorted. “See, it all started a long, long time ago in a land called Montana. We were kids on the playground. You know the story. Bailey got stuck on the monkey bars and Liam climbed up there to get her down.”

“Yes, but what does that have to do with you?”

“Well, that very same day, I was playing and this kid walked up to me, calling me fat and ugly, and then he pushed me down. I scraped up my hands and knees. And as I sat there, I cried in the gravel, wishing someone would beat up the jerk.”

“But no one did.”

“Liam saw the whole thing,” I said, remembering the incident. “As I recall, he told the kid to knock it off, and then he walked away. Not exactly the shining hero I’d wished for. He didn’t even help me up. But then again, he only had eyes for Bailey.”

Josie stared at me, her eyes wide as she sipped through the pink straw in her margarita. “He did nothing?”

“Nope. He didn’t know I had a crush on him.”

“And you didn’t tell him.”

“There was no point. He was always staring at Bailey.”

She took a long sip of her drink, then pulled back, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Brain freeze.” Shaking out her head, she took another sip. “So, that’s it? After that, you just gave up?”

I let out a humorless laugh, sipping my own drink. “Oh, no. I watched him from afar, always wishing he would look at me, but he never did. Not in middle school when someone shoved all my clothes in a locker while I was changing during gym.”

She gasped in horror. “What?”

“You never heard about that?”

She shook her head vigorously.

“Yep. I had to go to the bathroom, and I was mid-change. Time of the month was calling, so I was only in my bra and underwear. I ran to the bathroom, and when I got back, my clothes were gone. So, I stood there, fat rolls and all, while everyone laughed at me.”

“You didn’t have fat rolls,” she argued.

I let out another laugh. “You don’t remember me much from when we were younger, do you?”

“Not really. I’m two years younger than you.”

“Well, I was the fat kid. Always have been.”

“You are not fat!”

“I’m heavier,” I corrected. “And I’m fine with how I am now, but back then, it was hard to be the fat kid in school. And it didn’t get any better when I hit puberty, or when I went to the homecoming dance and my mom made me wear a dress that had sleeves.”

“It couldn’t have been that bad.”

I laughed just thinking about it. “God, it was hideous. She made it for me because it was a hard year for them. Imagine this…bright colors, every shape you can think of, all scattered on a black dress. I was like a walking neon sign,” I laughed.

“It was so horrible. And my poor mom thought it was the most beautiful dress she’d ever seen. ”

“Did you tell her how horrible it was?”

“God no. She wanted to make sure I could go to homecoming. She was trying to do something nice for me, and there was no way I was telling her it was ugly.”

Her eyes popped wide as she sat upright. “Is that why you have the shop? Because your mother dressed you in ugly clothes?”

“Shh!” I glanced around, hoping no one had overheard. “My mother didn’t know then, and she’s not going to know now just how horrible her fashion sense is. Someone else can tell her, but it’s not going to be me.”

“You have to have pictures of this.”

“Unfortunately, I have many of them,” I sighed. “And my mom has one over the mantle in her house. She’s so proud of that damn dress.”

Josie stared at me a moment, then burst out laughing, tossing her head back.

“That’s right. Laugh it up, but one day, you’ll be in the same position as me, picking out clothes for your kid. And she’ll hate them. Just you wait and see.”

JR appeared out of nowhere, his eyes laser-focused on Josie. “You’re pregnant?”

“I—what?” she asked, her chest still shaking with laughter.

“She said something about picking out clothes for your kid.”

Josie slid her hand over JR’s, patting it delicately. “Someday, she said. Meaning, in the future. Not right now.”

I blushed as his gaze trailed from her head, down to the top of her stomach. That was really all he could see from how she was sitting, but it was enough to give me a pretty damn good clue about where this was all headed.

Snatching my drink, I hopped off the stool. “I think I’ll go check up on Sawyer. It looks like he could use a friend.”

If I stayed around them too much longer, I’d have an orgasm just by the heated looks they passed between each other. And while it had been a good year since Mother Nature had passed me an orgasm, it had been years since I’d had a life-altering one.

And I wasn’t settling for anything less.