Chapter 17 #2
Her sister’s words landed hard. Aisha sat with them, remembering her conversation with Tariq on their return trip from Ashwaq. She had felt so used at the time, but perhaps he had felt that way all along. Tariq had been speaking the truth, and she didn’t want to hear it. The question was why?
Because somewhere along the way, she had developed feelings.
Maybe as early as the journey to Gruisea, when he took care of her during the storm, or the night of the banquet, when she felt his stare like physical touch. Or the kiss in Ashwaq—the one she replayed in her mind over and over…
‘Are we realising some things?’ Lilah asked in a teasing tone.
Safiya sat up at that. ‘Hopefully smart things.’
Aisha was realising that it didn’t matter how much she pushed her feelings down to protect herself and their arrangement, they just kept rising to the surface every time she caught sight of him or he said something or did something.
‘We kissed,’ Aisha blurted. ‘We slept together, and we kissed.’
Lilah’s expression fell. ‘Aren’t you supposed to wait until after the wedding?’
‘Isn’t kissing just part of sleeping with a man?’ Safiya asked. ‘Wouldn’t it be strange if you did it without kissing?’
Aisha pressed her eyes shut. ‘We didn’t sleep together, we slept together.’
Lilah blinked. ‘I’m quite lost.’
‘We shared a bed,’ Aisha said on an exhale. ‘We slept next to each other.’
A look of disgust settled on Safiya’s face. ‘Why?’
‘It’s a long story.’
‘Did you kiss in your sleep?’ Lilah asked.
‘Obviously not,’ Safiya said. ‘Did he snore like an old dog?’
Aisha frowned. ‘No.’
‘Remember that hound Yasmin had a few years back with the cataracts?’ Safiya continued.
Aisha rolled her eyes.
‘If he took advantage of you,’ Safiya said, ‘it would be grounds enough to call off the wedding and return home with us.’
‘He didn’t take advantage,’ Aisha said calmly.
Lilah clicked her fingers. ‘Rufun.’
Aisha and Safiya looked at her with confused expressions.
‘The dog with cataracts,’ Lilah explained.
‘Oh, that’s right,’ Safiya said. ‘She kept that thing alive way past its expiry.’
Groaning, Aisha covered her face with her hands. ‘I regret saying anything.’
Lilah pulled her hands away, forcing Aisha to look at her. ‘I’m relieved there’s something between you. You deserve some happiness for the sacrifice you made.’
Aisha felt herself relax.
‘It’s your turn next,’ Safiya said, shuffling over to play with Mira. ‘There will be royalty coming from all over the empire for this wedding. Zara will be hunting husbands left and right.’
Lilah crinkled her nose. ‘You make it sound so predatory.’
‘It’s about time men had a turn at being the prey.’ Safiya winced when Mira bit her mid-play. ‘Even Mira agrees. Her mother also died at the hands of a man.’
Aisha sighed. ‘A man who was saving me.’
Lilah climbed off the bed and walked over to the table, plucking a fig off the tray of food Maryam had brought them. ‘Have you prepared for the Promise Exchange? Chosen a dress for the Binding Feast?’
She was referring to the Gruisean traditions that took place ahead of the official ceremony. Lilah had learned all about them before Tariq’s visit, because she was supposed to be leaving with him. Thankfully, Maryam had explained them all in detail to Aisha.
‘These happen before the wedding?’ Safiya asked.
Aisha nodded. ‘First, we have the Promise Exchange, where we each ask a promise of the other. It’s engraved onto a silver token and exchanged before witnesses. We wear them only if we’re prepared to keep that promise.’
That tradition seemed simple enough.
‘Then comes the Binding Feast,’ Lilah said. ‘The couple interact only with each other under the watchful eyes of the nobility. Any disconnect, arguments, awkward moments, or unhappy expressions reflect poorly on the union.’
Safiya laughed. ‘How ridiculous.’
Lilah continued. ‘At the end of the evening, the guests confirm whether the pair are a good match.’
‘So, an evening of fake smiles,’ Safiya said. ‘Welcome to the life of a queen.’
‘And there’s a dance,’ Lilah said. ‘A symbol of how in sync they are.’
Safiya looked over at Aisha. ‘Dare I say no one will be watching your feet closer than the queen.’
‘Thanks for that,’ Aisha said drily.
‘Have you learned the dance?’ Lilah asked.
‘Maryam showed me all the steps.’
‘That’s not enough,’ Lilah said. ‘You need to practise.’ She rose and straightened out her dress. ‘Come on. I’ll do it with you.’
‘And I’ll play the role of the queen,’ Safiya said, moving to the edge of the bed.
Aisha shot her a tired look.
‘Lilah, I’m surprised you still remember the steps,’ Safiya said.
‘When Zara is your teacher, you don’t dare forget.’ Lilah dragged Aisha to the centre of the room. ‘You begin like this.’ She positioned Aisha. ‘Imagine I’m Tariq.’
‘But try to refrain from kissing her,’ Safiya said.
‘Chin up,’ Lilah said. ‘There you go.’
They bowed to each other, then began to step, with Lilah counting, ‘One, two, three, four. Back, side, forward, side.’ She smiled. ‘Good.’
Aisha tried to make her movements graceful and effortless, like Maryam had told her to.
‘Look at those narrow hips,’ Safiya said with an exaggerated accent. ‘How on earth will she birth my son’s large-headed sons?’
Aisha stopped dead and turned to her.
‘What?’ Safiya said. ‘I told you I was playing the role of queen.’
Lilah tutted. ‘Ignore her. Your children’s heads will be perfectly average. Keep your eyes on me.’
As they continued, Mira grabbed hold of Aisha’s ankle mid-step, causing her to lose her balance and fall into Lilah. They both went down.
‘Is this part of the dance?’ Safiya asked.
Aisha and Lilah both burst out laughing. Gods, it felt good to laugh again. And laughing with her sisters was a special kind of good.
Rolling onto her back, Aisha caught her breath, one side of her ribs aching. ‘I’ve missed you both so much.’
Lilah reached out and took her hand, and Safiya came to join them on the floor.
‘I hate that our reunion’s here in this strange place,’ Safiya said. ‘And I hate that our next reunion will probably be in another strange place.’
It was true. The next time they were all together again would likely be Lilah’s wedding.
‘I just wish we were all at home,’ Safiya continued.
For all of Safiya’s bravado, she was actually a big sentimental softie at her core.
‘This was always the plan,’ Aisha said. ‘We do it for Avanid.’
‘And for Mother,’ Lilah added, ‘who couldn’t.’
They fell silent.
Outside, the sun was setting and darkness crept in. With her sisters there, she was in no rush to light the lamp.
‘This will all be worth it, won’t it?’ Lilah asked. ‘Dispersed across the empire. Separated from one another.’
Aisha swallowed. ‘Yes, it will be worth it.’
More silence.
‘Aisha,’ Lilah said.
‘Mm?’
‘Don’t forget there’s a kiss at the end of the Promise Exchange. The two of you should practise since the king and queen will be present. You want it to look as effortless as the dance.’
Aisha turned her head to her sister. ‘Maryam didn’t mention anything about a kiss.’
‘I’m certain Zara told me it takes place at the end.’
Aisha looked back at the ceiling.
Safiya held her stomach. ‘I don’t think I can watch.’
Aisha laughed softly.
That evening, despite the rooms across the corridor all made up for Lilah and Safiya, the three sisters slept in Aisha’s bed, like they had done so many times throughout their lives.
It was the best sleep Aisha had experienced since arriving in Gruisea.