For Keeps

17. Thirteen

Thirteen

Jake

W atching Fallon’s interrogating eyes flitter over Beau while he chatted with a group from Woodburn should have pissed me off. Should have made my blood boil with jealousy or my heart thrum with anger.

But it didn’t. It intrigued me.

I fixed my gaze on her as she laughed and joked, hiding that tight grip on her beer.

Beau ducked away, but Fallon continued chatting like she wanted to be there. She didn’t. Clear as day, even in the dark. Despite her enormous heart, my social butterfly held little affection for Chloe Parker, the girl clinging to Beau’s arm at any opportunity.

Trevor kissed Tori’s cheek and left the girls. Fallon probably wanted to pummel Jenny for catching a stomach bug and missing the party. Her amber eyes darted to mine. It wasn’t guilt on her face this time—maybe uncertainty more than anything.

“Then there ’s nothing wrong with hot and fun.”

I meant it. Fallon could have her fantasies. Joining her in those fantasies got me hard. Nothing more to it. So long as we enjoyed them together, it could be fun.

Besides, Beau hadn’t moved back. He lived… Shit. He was homeless. But still, Windmere wasn’t his endgame, and Fallon was mine.

The jerk was hardworking and honest.Good-humored. Self-effacing at times, playful, and respectful of others, despite his blustering and dumb jokes growing up.

The goofy prick made things fun, even when he had plenty to complain or whine about. He laughed even though his life was presently a heaping pile of shit. Joked even when he had an abundance of reasons to cry.

So very different from me.Maybe I wanted to be like him for a minute—fun.

“Beer?” Beau asked, approaching as he finally put on his hoodie. The guy spent all day shirtless, like the worst humble brag.

I watched Fallon for a beat longer before turning away. “Nah. I’m good.”

He smacked my shoulder. “You misunderstood. I was asking if you’ll grab me one.” His chin jutted to where Trevor hovered.“I’m dying for a drink, but every time I go for one, Trevor lurks by the cooler, hoarding his treasure like a dragon.”

I laughed, crossing my arms over my chest. Assessing Trevor, I leaned closer to Beau. “He that hard up to share his beer with you? What’d you do to piss him off? And how come his tactics end in your avoidance and mine don’t?”

“You love our blossoming camaraderie, dick face.” Beau sighed, turning his back to the cooler. “He’s hard up to punish me, yes. Secret time, buddy?”

Dumbass.

“Hit me with it,” I said, rubbing a hand over the rough stubble on my neck.

He lowered his voice, subtly gesturing toward Tori. “They invited me for a sleepover .” His eyebrows raised suggestively.

My teeth clicked together as I clenched my jaw. I hadn’t expected that to pop out of his mouth. Not that I cared.

Not my business. Not my interest, either. Leave it be.

“Not a fan of pillow fights?” I grumbled, my skin tight and agitated. Probably irritated by the minerals in the river water. Fresh springs, my ass.

He grinned, elbowing me in the ribs. “No problems being smothered in soft pillows.”

“Dumb joke,” I muttered, giving Trevor a final look before glancing away. “I’m not grabbing you a beer.”

I turned on my heels, done with secret sharing. It was getting late, and Beau could sort out his personal issues on his own.

“Hey,” he called, trotting behind me like a puppy. “You okay?”

“Yep.” I waved over my shoulder. “Enjoy whatever the hell you’re doing tonight with your friends.”

My fingers flexed at my side, my hands balling as I paced at the edge of the woods opposite of the parking lot, trying to get a grip on my aggravation.

No reason to be upset. None.

Catching up, Beau tugged on my arm. “Hey, comrade, why the—”

I shoved him, causing him to stumble back as he rubbed at his chest.

“Ow,” Beau mumbled. “You’ve got some bear paws there. What gives? Did I say something to piss you off? More than usual?” He continued rubbing his chest, a confused pinch around his eyes. “Scared I might replace you with a new best friend? I mean, you have Adam, and I’ve yet to comment, but—”

“Shut the fuck up,” I muttered. With a heavy sigh, I gestured toward the party. “That guy was such an asshole in high school.”

A joyful smile adorned his idiotic face. “So were you, bud.”

I fidgeted with the drawstring on my trunks, glancing away and unable to meet his eyes. “I know, but not… not like him. Not like that night.”

Beau stilled, his smile slowly dying. “What night?” he asked carefully.

“A couple of months before we graduated, after a shit game with Woodburn that I threw away because I was pissed at the world and hating life. Adam had a bonfire. We were all there. Trevor Parker screwed him over. Did you know that? When Adam got arrested—that was Trevor’s fault.”

He swallowed. “I had no idea.”

“Right. Well. It ruined Adam’s life.” I wiped my hand over my mouth. “I followed you when you disappeared. I shouldn’t have.”

Beau’s expression was difficult to read in the light of the moon. Maybe the revelation upset him. Perhaps it embarrassed him.

Because never in my wildest dreams did I expect to see Trevor on his knees in front of Beau.

And Beau… the way he gripped Trevor’s hair and dropped his head back, groaning and saying filthy shit to Trevor…

I stared, transfixed by the entire encounter. I’d never seen two guys together like that. I watched pretty hetero-vanilla porn at the time. I thought anal was the dirtiest shit I could do with a girl back then.

But seeing that?It caught me off guard.

“Take it all, you fucking prick. You belong on your knees.”

The groan Trevor released with every degrading and salacious taunt told me he had no problem with Beau’s dirty talk.

I hadn’t expected that. Guess I assumed Beau would be some fumbling dickwad who didn’t know how to handle another person. But from how he managed Trevor, it was apparent he was comfortable being in control.

“So?” he shrugged defensively. “Bothers you that I fuck men, too? Why? Don’t like there’s one thing in this world that we can’t compete over?”

“What? No?” I practically spat, taking a step forward to… shit, I don’t know. Hit him or something. Registering my agitation, he backed up.

“I don’t give a shit if you’re into dicks or cunts or asses or nothing at all, Beau. It bothers me that you would entertain being friends with that guy given…”

“Given what?” Beau asked, cocking his head. This time, he stepped forward, sending me back on my heels. “What, Jake? Given what?”

My eyes shut. I didn’t want to say it. I didn’t want to think about it. I’d spent too many nights thinking about it afterward. Wondering why it fascinated me so much. Wondering why it made me hate Beau a little less when I only wanted to hate him more.

Beau fucked girls. That was not his first blowjob, but judging by his grin that night, it might have been his first from a guy.

“That was amazing. Do you want to hang out next weekend? Go to the batting range or something? You drop your elbow when you wind up. We could catch a movie after if you want.”

Pitiful how much Beau wanted to be liked.

Tucking himself away, Beau had zipped his jeans and made to leave, but Trevor caged him against the tree.

“What do you think you’re doing? I swallowed for you, Beau. Now you’re going to take me.”

Beau had given a shy smile, his hand feathering through his hair. He wore it messier back then, longer. Nervous fingers combed through those chestnut locks. It was the first time I’d ever seen him look anything other than overly confident.

“I’ve, uh, never blown a guy. So. Don’t laugh, okay?”

I should have left at that moment. All the moments before, but I couldn’t stop watching. Like this peek into a world where Beau wasn’t blowing smoke or boasting or congratulating himself for all the shit that made him so fantastic. He looked vulnerable.

I couldn’t make sense of it, and I lingered, trying to understand.

“I said you were going to take me. I didn’t say anything about a blowjob. Have you been fucked?”

“N—no,” he whispered. “I don’t… I’m not… I don’t know if I even want to bottom. I’m not ready.”

“I’ll get you ready. A few fingers, and you’ll be begging for it.”

“No, I mean here.” Beau pointed to his head.

Trevor gave a mocking smile. “I expected to fuck. I don’t want a second-place mouth or some shoddy hand job.”

His fingers flexed against the bark, and in one breath, I was on the balls of my feet and tearing along the path to step in. But Trevor pushed off, shaking his head.

“You waste my time. Don’t be a fag that teases. No wonder nobody takes you seriously.”

Beau’s face crumpled, but only for a moment. He pasted on a grin. “Got it. Guess that’s a no for hanging out, huh?”

“See you around, Beau.”

As soon as Trevor was gone, Beau slunk down the tree, his head in his hands, as he mumbled, “Fucking idiot. Fucking, fucking idiot.”

After a few deep breaths, he got up, that determined smile hanging on when he returned to the party.

Joining his friends, he acted like nothing was out of sorts. But I caught the nearly imperceptible tremble of his hand as he sipped his beer—a slight lag in his laugh after each joke.

“Given what, man?” Beau prodded, waving his hand in my face to flag my attention. “What’s your problem with him if it’s not the dude-on-dude action?”

He scared you, and he was cruel to you.

I’d been mean plenty. Growing up, I probably held the lion’s share of contempt in our rivalry, but I was never cruel. It bothered me that Trevor had been, and Beau either didn’t notice or didn’t care enough to be bothered by it.

Beau’s eyes scanned mine, smiling like reading my mind was the most fun game. But some things I wouldn’t share. I just couldn’t.

I cleared my throat. “I have no problem with your dude-on-dude action. I’m just blown away that you think you can handle two people at once when you can hardly manage yourself.”

“Christ,” Beau groaned, shaking his head. “I haven’t even managed myself in the last month. Some serious blue balls crashing with my folks.” He sighed, cupping his chin and staring contemplatively at the ground.

“While I’ve no desire to fuck or be fucked by Trevor, given what a tremendous bitch he is, I’m relieved you’re watching my back, buddy.” His hand grasped my shoulder. “For a moment, I worried you were a real homophobe, and we might have to break up.”

“I literally do not care who you fuck, Beau.”

The wicked grin on his face made me immediately wish I could take the words back.

“Oh, Jake. That’s not true,” he said in a hushed voice.

“You’re going there, huh?” I sniffed, thumbing my nose and standing tall. There wasn’t much of a difference in height between us, and Beau was broader, but he had those T-Rex arms. I’d fight him if it came to it.

He lifted one shoulder. “I could, but I won’t. Can’t stomach making my best friend cry.”

A teasing smile played on his lips. His eyes fixed on mine in a challenge I was unsure I wanted to accept.

A loud cheer in the distance split the night air, and I glanced away. My gut danced wildly, and my breath went shallow. I shouldn’t provoke a sensitive situation, but I couldn’t stop myself just like before.

Avoiding his stare, I said, “The only one crying would be Fallon when you flounder between her legs.”

Beau’s head dropped back, and he clutched his stomach, laughing—such a drama queen.

Settling, he wiped fake tears from beneath his eyes. “Yeah, okay. Guess I’m the one crying; you got me laughing so hard.”

I should have let it go. The blood rushing through my ears told me to. The flutter in my chest agreed.

“What’s so funny? You think you know what my girl wants?”

He headed for the party. “Har fucking har, buddy. Let’s go raid that beer. You’ll distract, and I’ll grab—”

“Did she come when you ate her pussy?” I swear, the words were out of my mouth fast enough to bowl him over.

Beau choked on his spit, patting his chest. “Excuse me?”

I licked my lips, in for a goddamn penny, out for a fucking pound.

“You heard me just fine. Did she come when you ate her pussy? Takes her a while. You have to stay steady. Move or change pace or pressure, and you gotta start over.”

He cleared his throat, tugging at the collar of his hoodie. “Yeah, I know,” he said quietly.

“Do you, now? What else do you know about pleasing her?”

“Jake,” he whispered, possibly a plea. “This isn’t a good idea.”

I brushed past him, feigning indifference to the fact he stopped to gawk at me. “Not my fault you’re mediocre.”

He bristled. “I’m not a mediocre pussy-eater.”

As if that were his line in the sand after weeks of taunting.

“Sure,” I called over my shoulder. Somebody started a small campfire along the bank, a group holding sticks and roasting marshmallows. Sweet. I hoped they had chocolate and graham crackers, too.

He caught up, shoving my arm. “Dick. I’m not a mediocre pussy-eater. You think because I’m into dudes too that I can’t eat pussy?”

“No,” I corrected. “I think you can’t eat pussy because you’re a mediocre pussy-eater. Nothing to do with your interest in men.” I clapped my hands, rubbing them together. “Grab a stick. We’ve got some roasting.”

The irritated scowl on his face told me it wasn’t only marshmallows to roast. Damn, he looked mighty pissed.

“I eat pussy better than you, Jake. Guaranteed. Don’t make me tell you how I know, but I know.”

The balls on him.

“You love sharing your secrets, you cryptic clown. You’re trying to provoke me, and fuck you for it.”

Beau cackled like a witch over her cauldron. “ I’m trying to provoke you ? You started all this shit!”

The shadows crossing over his face gave him a slightly sinister glare. Or maybe I really had pissed him off. Finally broke him.

“You’re lying to piss me off. Tell me how you know,” I demanded.

“No.” Beau shook his head, his arms crossed guardedly over his chest. “No way.”

I shrugged, resuming my retreat. “No shame in backtracking on your bold and inaccurate claims—”

“Your girl can squirt.”

I halted, turning with a slow blink.

Beau’s eyes squeezed tight. “Your girl can squirt. I know because I made her.”

“No fucking way,” I whispered, stalking toward him and thrusting a finger into his chest. His eyes popped open. “Tell me the truth, Beau. I’m not fucking around. No antagonizing.”

He puffed an exhale, nodding. “It’s true. I gave her head one night so good that she squirted. She said it was the first time it had ever happened.” He gestured up and down at my startled state. “Guessing it hasn’t happened since.”

“A fluke!” I cried, unsure if it was disbelief, jealousy, inadequacy, admiration, or —

“Hey, guys!” Spotting us, Fallon chose the absolute worst time to bounce over. “Whatcha doing?”

I gaped, pointing at Beau. “He says he eats pussy better.”

“Nope.” Fallon held up her hands, backing away. “See ya, fellas.”

I grabbed the hem of her shirt just as she turned to flee, pulling her over. “Not so fast, baby. Where do you think you’re going?”

“To hell,” she squeaked, burying her face in her hands.

Laughter bubbled from Beau’s lips. The proud bastard was plenty pleased to snare this catch. “You like it hot. Seems the right fit.”

“Not helping,” she hissed at him, her eyes shifting to mine. “I get it. You boys have this energy, and you need competition or dick-slinging or shit-talking to fuel it, but as a social worker, the laws of confidentiality bind me—”

“Bullshit, but you are a state-mandated reporter, and you’re about to witness a crime if this fucker is lying to mess with me.” I lowered my voice, ignoring the delighted grin on Beau’s face. “Baby, did you squirt ?”

She glanced at Beau, then back to me. “Um. Could have been pee?”

Beau grinned wider. “Definitely wasn’t.”

“Beau!” Fallon snapped as I grunted, “ Motherfucker .”

Running a hand along my jaw, I considered that Beau Dalton made my girl squirt. I never got her there. I got her to come plenty, until she passed out when she was up for it, but never squirt.

Inadequacy didn’t drive my wonderment. Not jealousy. Okay, maybe a little jealousy. I mean, she squirted! But again, it was that insatiable curiosity. Beau did something I couldn’t.

But I wanted to.

I tugged her closer, her back against my chest, as I kept my eyes on Beau and walked us backward to the woods and into the obscurity of the darkness.

Beau’s eyes didn’t leave mine, registering my intentions. Far too in sync, but I tucked the thought away with the rest, my body leading.

“What are you doing?” Fallon’s breath stuttered as she glanced between Beau and me, a couple of hungry wolves ready to devour their prey.

Every step back was met with a forward launch from Beau, stalking on our trail with his eyes alight as he took her in.

“He wants me to prove it,” Beau answered with a dark chuckle. “Another contest, buddy?”

My dick ached, uncomfortably pressed against my shorts and the cleft of her ass.

I didn’t stop until I backed against a boulder just inside the woods. High enough to lean on for support, this spot would do.

“You’re more perceptive than I gave you credit for, Dalton. Prove it. Make her squirt.”

Show me how is what I wanted to say, but it got stuck in my throat. Because Fallon was right, this is how the energy existed between Beau and me. It charged and charged. We turned it into a competition, the only way to expel it.

Or so I thought.

“Don’t mind me,” she said. “Why ask the woman stuck between two cocksure baboons how she feels about some stupid—”

My eyes remained on Beau’s as I murmured into her ear, “How do you feel about him eating your pussy while I watch and call him a filthy liar when he can’t do what he says?”

“Oh,” Fallon breathed. She craned her neck to look at me. “How do you feel about it?”

“Depends,” I said. “Is he a mediocre-pussy eater?”

She bit her lip, uncertainty etched on her face, not with her answer, but whether it was okay to give it.

“Go on,” I whispered encouragement. “It doesn’t upset me. Hot and fun, right, baby?”

She nodded and took a deep breath. “No,” she said, loud enough for him to hear. “He’s not mediocre. Expert level.”

Beau clapped his hands once and whooped.

“Keep dancing like a fool, and I’m revoking the offer and carting her off to fuck in the cab of my truck.”

Beau immediately stopped dancing.

“Animal,” he muttered. “Looks like I’m not the mediocre pussy-eater. ”

“Oh, he’s not either,” my girl said, making my chest swell with unbridled pride. “Jake is also expert level.”

“Whose fingers would you rather have playing with your clit?” I murmured.

“Who’s a better kisser?” Beau stepped closer, gesturing between us. “He uses too much tongue, right? I’ve seen him maul you. Blink twice if you need a safe van to escape this monster.”

Her eyes widened. “Oh my god, you guys are insane.”

I stared, mouth agape. “She loves my tongue!” The goddamn nerve of this guy. “Baby, tell him.”

My girl gave an exasperated sigh. “I do love his tongue.” When Beau’s eyes sank, she hurried to add, “Yours, too, Beau. You dumbasses don’t deserve the praise when you’re acting so dumbassy. You had your fun. Let’s go.”

I held her in place, pinning her arms to her side.

Beau’s eyes lit up so bright we didn’t need the moon’s glow.

“You want to kiss her, don’t you?” I taunted.

She didn’t protest when I bracketed beneath her jaw, exposing her nape and kissing up the column of smooth skin.

Beau licked his lips, his eyes focused on her mouth. “So much.”

Pleasure shot through me, everything lighting up with the satisfaction of his desire for my girl—this thing he wanted and could only have with my permission.

And maybe I was a fool for it, but I wanted to see how he kissed her. How beautiful she looked when she licked inside his mouth and moaned through breathless kisses.

“How much?” I rasped, my voice hoarse and my dick agonizingly hard. I rubbed against my girl’s ass, and when she whimpered, it was like a call to attention for Beau.

He stared at her for a moment before his gaze flickered to me. “I’m aching to kiss her. Always aching to kiss her. I wish I could say I’m sorry for it.”

Fallon’s eyes fluttered shut as she released an unsteady breath.

“What would you do to kiss her? Mmm. She tastes so good.” I licked her skin, pressing tiny, open-mouthed kisses where I swirled my tongue.

Beau’s eyes pinched with a pained groan. “Anything. I’d do anything.” No hesitation. He meant it.

Approval rumbled low in my throat. My girl deserved the best.

It should have killed me that he wanted her when she still wanted him.It should have torn me up inside, splintering my heart.

But it didn’t.

“Would you get on your knees and beg?”

Without breaking eye contact, Beau slowly lowered until his knees hit the ground. “Please,” he groaned. “Can I kiss her? ”

My lips brushed the shell of her ear. “What’s it going to be, baby? That good enough?”

“Jake,” she breathed, her fingers flexing into my thighs as she gripped to hold steady. “Don’t be mean.”

“Nobody’s being mean. He said he’d do anything.”

Panic flashed in Beau’s eyes, a dawning horror that I was in a vicious mood.

And he was right.

“Earn it. I want to hear begging.”

His brows furrowed. “I don’t—”

“Earn it. Do you want her? How are you going to get her?”

I expected him to pout or huff and storm off—fear of ridicule or an unwillingness for games when plenty of women wanted him just down the river.

But Beau liked games.

“Fal, sweet girl,” he practically purred. “Can I touch you?”

She glanced over her shoulder, her hesitant eyes seeking mine.

I gripped her chin, guiding her to face forward again.“I’m not here. I support whatever you do or do not want to do. All clear for me if you’re enjoying yourself, baby.”

“Jake, I won’t—”

But she would because she wanted to. And I… I wanted her to.

“I want to watch you. You love me?” I breathed against her neck.

“So much,” she panted, her chest heaving.

“You know I love you?”

“Yes.”

Nipping her heated skin, I murmured, “Make him beg, then.”

Her gaze snapped to Beau.

He hardly glanced at me, shaking his head. “You wanted this just as much as me. Remember that later.”

I wouldn’t forget.

Tenderly, he cupped her ankles, his thumbs padding the balls of them. “You’re so pretty, Fal. Look so good reigning over me.”

It was already apparent that we touched her differently and spoke differently. What would he do?

His palms smoothed up her leg, massaging her calf. With only an old t-shirt over her bikini, plenty of skin remained free to touch. What would he do with it?

“Remember that night in the garage just before Christmas?” he murmured, brushing up and down her legs. “How we used my dad’s shop to hook up since we were both staying with our parents?”

I fucked Fallon in her childhood bed regularly when she lived with her parents, but not the right time for that flex.

She smiled. “Yes.”

“I still think of you riding my face. Remember? We’d just fucked, and I told you I always wondered what we’d be like together. And you, you determined little tease, said, ‘Why wonder when you can know?’ and climbed up my chest and straddled my face. Seated yourself like a queen so I could taste the mix of us.”

I adjusted myself. My girl was something else.

“That’s hot, baby. So fucking bossy,” I groaned in her ear. Goddamn, the thought of her having power over him had my balls aching.

“Yes,” she whispered, her head dropping onto my shoulder as she reached behind to stroke me. “I remember that.”

Beau slid his hand along the inside of her legs, rubbing over her knees and rising to her thighs, opening them wider.

I couldn’t look away. Didn’t want to. Inconceivable that Fallon slumped against me with her eyes closed. Why wasn’t she watching this?

I hated how hot this was. No, I think I hated how much I didn’t hate how hot this was.

Rarely did I get to see Fallon turned on when I was not responsible for touching or talking to her. But this was different from the times she let me watch her touch herself. Flushed cheeks and glassy eyes. She relaxed and spread her legs wide.

Intoxicating—the only way to describe the sound of her breathless gasps or the tiny flutter of her long lashes.

I studied his touch and compared it to my own. Not with judgment, but interest. He took his time and was patient in working her up. The erection tenting his shorts was evidence of his excitement, but he rushed nothing.

“I can still taste you,” Beau whispered against her thigh. “When I dream about it. Still hear your breathy whimpers. Still feel your thighs rubbing my skin raw and not caring because you fucked my face into oblivion, and I’d have died just to watch you fall apart like that. Thought maybe I had because you are heaven, sweet girl.”

Jesus. I wanted to touch myself thinking about it. Fallon, blissed out in arousal, had stopped stroking me.

“Remember that night?” he breathed, squeezing the back of her thighs, just beneath her ass.

“Yes,” she whimpered, squirming when Beau loosened the strings of her bikini bottoms.

My breath caught as I watched with rapt attention.

“Want to do that again?”

“Please,” she moaned, her back arching as he lowered her suit. “Please, Beau. Please.”

Beau shot me a grin and winked. “You said you wanted to hear begging.”