For Keeps

CH 14 - #oursecret

Riley

Song: “Give It All We Got Tonight” by George Strait

RHYS AND I had been at Gallagher’s for only a few minutes. It was my favorite restaurant in Cypress Hills because of its delicious food, rustic décor, relaxed atmosphere…and ghosts. They’d been pulling pranks since the building’s construction in the 1800s.

While it’d been Gallagher’s, things like the ceiling lights flickering and a beer tap pull handle being invisibly pulled and leaving a mess for the bartender to clean up were common. So was hearing the faint laughter of a woman and the paper towel dispenser in the bathroom dispensing on its own while a patron sat on the toilet. No wave of their hand beneath the electronic device was needed to activate it.

“Well, hello, Riley Martin and Rhys Silverman! It is so good to see y’all!” Mrs. Jenkins said when she reached our table.

“How are you doing, ma’am?” I asked her.

“I’m peachy, honey. I heard about both of your broken engagements,” she said, looking at Rhys and me. “How are you two holding up with everything?”

Rhys and I cut our eyes over at each other. Then he answered for both of us, saying we were doing fine.

“Are y’all back together?” the robust, mid-50s waitress continued.

“No, ma’am, we’re not.”

“The happiness showing on your faces made me think otherwise. Selfishly, I’d love to see you two high school sweethearts reunite.”

I didn’t know how to respond, and Rhys didn’t either. We both just kept staring at Mrs. Jenkins. She grinned again and asked us what we’d like to drink.

“Two sweet teas with lemon, please,” Rhys told her.

“Got it!”

“Riley and I already know what we want to eat, too, if you’d like to write that down.”

“What’ll you have?”

“Irish nachos.”

“One or two orders? You know how big they are.”

Rhys looked at me and shrugged.

“No, I cannot eat a whole order by myself, but leftovers are amazing,” I told him.

“You’re right about that!”

“Then two orders, it is,” Mrs. Jenkins said. “I’ll be back in a jiffy with your teas, cutie pies.”

After she walked off, I turned to Rhys. “My gosh, she hasn’t changed at all. Still direct as ever.”

“Yep.”

“Something that I hadn’t thought about is how shocked the folks who know us around here will be whenever they see us together.”

Rhys nodded. “They’re all likely to assume we’re a couple again. It’ll be difficult for them to imagine us being just friends.”

“Is it that way for your family?”

“The only thing they’ve said is they’re happy for us.”

“That’s what mine said, too, and Macie, of course.”

“My mom and dad mentioned how much they’d love to see you before you leave town.”

“I would love to see them. I’ve really missed them.”

“Then go. You’ve always been welcome, Riley.”

“Even after…”

“Yes. Even after we were over.”

I took a deep breath. “Okay. I’ll stop by sometime this weekend. I also want to see my grandma, but it’s hard. You know?”

“I’ll go with you if you want.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely. Just let me know when.”

“You’re the best.”

“I think you are you, too.”

Rhys kept looking at me, making my heart flutter and a rush of heat race through my body. Then Mrs. Jenkins returned to our table with our glasses of tea. Once she’d walked off again, I told Rhys that my grandpa was coming over to eat supper with my parents and me later.

“That’ll be a good time,” he said.

“Rachel and Jackson are also coming. Would you like to join us? You know my momma and daddy would be thrilled.”

“I appreciate the invitation, but I’ve got to get three of the B&Bs ready.”

“Another time, then?”

“Of course.”

“Speaking of time… I’m running out. I wish I could stay in town longer.”

“You could.”

“No, I can’t. I have rent to pay, which requires me to work.”

“What if I paid your rent?” Rhys winked at me.

“You’re something else.”

“I’m serious. If I did, would you stay for another week? We could keep having fun.”

“My need to leave on Sunday isn’t only about my rent, which I can pay. It’s also about my boss. He’s understood my absence for a week, but I don’t think he would for another one.”

“I know. It’s just that I hate for you to leave.”

The words between us stopped, but Rhys and I kept staring into each other’s eyes. The wanting look in his made another rush of heat race through me, settling between my thighs this time. Then, a song began playing on Gallagher’s sound system that Rhys and I knew all too well, just like the memory attached to it.

Hearing it sent him flying back into the past like it had me—evidenced by the matching “Oh God” looks on our faces. A moment later, Rhys grabbed my hand and held it while running his thumb over the heart-shaped locket tattooed on my ring finger.

As George Strait’s “Give It All We Got Tonight” continued playing, I fully recalled a summer night after Rhys and I graduated from high school. We’d finished eating supper at Gallagher’s and decided to cruise the backroads.

The day’s heat had dissipated, so Rhys rolled down the windows on Black Betty and turned up the music on the radio. We sang along with several songs while enjoying the scent of honeysuckle in the air and just being together. Then I leaned over and started running my tongue up and down Rhys’s neck, tasting his warm, salty skin.

It wasn’t long before he pulled over and parked on the side of the dirt road. I straddled his lap, and we kissed until we were breathless. Taking off our clothes came next, followed by us having sex in the front seat as this very George Strait song played.

Rhys’s condom broke that night, causing us both to panic. A few weeks later, we both smiled when the pregnancy test I took came back positive. For some reason, our fear of becoming young parents went away at that moment.

Rhys and I discussed telling our families about our exciting news and decided to do it three days later, after church—but I miscarried early that Sunday morning in my bathroom at my parents’ house. Rhys and I both cried when I called him to let him know what’d happened. Then he told me that he was on his way to see me.

I went downstairs long enough to tell my momma, daddy, and Rachel that I’d started my period and wouldn’t be going to church with them because I was cramping too severely. I also told them that I’d asked Rhys to come over to help me feel better. Under the same monthly circumstance, I’d done that many times before, so no red flags were raised.

Half an hour later, Rhys walked into my bedroom with a bouquet of freshly picked wildflowers, a large cherry limeade from Sonic, a brand-new heating pad, and a bottle of Advil dual-action pain reliever. I mirrored his weary smile, and then he stretched out beside me on my bed and held me in his arms—both of us grieving what we’d lost.

Sitting here inside Gallagher’s with “Give It All We Got Tonight” still playing and the memory of my miscarriage at the forefront of my mind as much as it was Rhys’s, he let go of my hand and pulled my chair up next to his. Then he hugged me and rested his head against mine until the song ended. That was when Mrs. Jenkins walked up with our lunches.

“Oh my! What’s wrong?” she asked us.

“Riley and I just remembered something,” Rhys said, wiping his eyes like I was.

“Is there anything I can do to help y’all?”

“No, ma’am, but thank you. We’ll be fine.”

After Mrs. Jenkins walked off, Rhys and I looked at each other.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

I nodded. “Because of you.”

He pressed his lips against my temple and held them there. I closed my eyes while taking in his comfort and appreciating his loving and giving ways. A couple of minutes later, we started eating and enjoyed our meals.

When we were done, I got a to-go box, but Rhys didn’t need one. He’d cleaned his whole plate and rubbed his belly afterward, so proud of himself. I just giggled at him.

While returning to his truck, I asked him if he had to take care of the B&Bs right away.

“No, I’ve got some breathing room,” he said. “Would you like to go do something else?”

“Cruise around for a little while. Maybe stop at Cypress Hills Outpost for some ice cream.”

“Sounds good to me.”

He opened the passenger-side door, and I hopped into Black Betty. After placing my leftovers on the console, I reached for my seatbelt.

“No, ma’am,” Rhys said, taking it from me. “That’s my job.”

I grinned, and he fastened me into my seat. He didn’t close my door afterward, though. He kept leaning against my right thigh, gazing directly into my eyes.

I didn’t know what he was thinking, but I knew what I was imagining with his ruggedly handsome face so close to mine. Then I gave in and did what I’d been wanting to do. I kissed Rhys. I pressed my lips against his and breathed him in, but only for a moment because he pulled away from me.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that,” I said.

“Don’t be sorry. I’m not. You just surprised me.”

“I’ve wanted to kiss you before now, Rhys.”

“I’ve wanted to kiss you, too, but wasn’t willing to risk ruining our friendship.”

“That’s why I held back. But I’m not doing that anymore.”

“Neither am I.”

Within seconds, Rhys had my seatbelt off me, my face in his hands, and his lips on mine. We were all breaths, tongues, teeth, and moans. We’d been starving for this, and finally, it was happening.

Then someone said, “Get a room.”

Rhys and I stopped kissing, looked in the direction the voice had come, and saw a guy walking across the parking lot. I didn’t recognize him, and Rhys’s lack of response let me know he didn’t recognize him. But the guy was grinning and gave us a “no offense” wave. When he got to his car, Rhys turned to me.

“I wish I could start this moment over with you,” he said.

“I don’t. It was all I imagined it would be. Why don’t we pick up where we left off?”

“Not here. I’m taking you home.”

In the few minutes it took to get to my momma and daddy’s, Rhys and I were quiet, anxious to touch each other again. Would it be just another kiss? Or would it be more? I knew what I wanted to happen.

Walking up the porch steps, I asked Rhys if he’d grab the mail. He nodded, and as I unlocked the front door, he reached into the black metal box beside it. After we went inside, he set the stack of mail down on the kitchen counter.

I had just turned around from putting my to-go box of leftover Irish nachos into the refrigerator and bumped into Rhys’s chest. He steadied me and stared into my eyes. The sexual tension between us was heated and thick, and we desperately needed relief. Rhys was waiting for me to take the lead, though. So I took him by the hand and led him upstairs to my bedroom.

After closing and locking the door behind us, I walked up to him, standing a few feet away. “I want to be with you, but not if it’s going to mess with your head,” I said.

“I don’t care if it does.”

He grabbed my face and started kissing me as passionately as he’d done less than fifteen minutes ago. Then he walked me backward to my bed—both of us falling across it and Rhys laying on top of me.

We started kissing again and also slow-grinding each other. Rhys’s hard cock pressing against my pussy, through his jeans and my shorts, had my panties soaked.

It didn’t take long for things to become even more heated between us. We were all over my bed, and then Rhys stopped everything he was doing to me and buried his face in my neck.

“What’s wrong? I asked, alarmed.

He slowly raised his head and struggled to look me in the eye. “I couldn’t wait, Riley. I wanted you so badly. I’m sorry.”

He had cum, and I had no idea because he hadn’t made a sound.

“It’s okay,” I said, touching his cheek.

“No, it isn’t. I’m embarrassed. This has never happened to me before.”

“There’s no reason to be embarrassed. You’re with me.”

“I’m not leaving here until I’ve satisfied you, and I know another way to do it.”

Rhys got up off my bed and started undressing me. My New Balance running shoes came first, my ankle socks followed, and my Lululemon T-shirt and sports bra came next. The last of my clothing was my shorts and panties.

I watched Rhys’s face as he stripped me bare, loving the laser focus in his eyes. I also loved seeing the flare of his nostrils, his clenched jaws, and the smooth swiftness of his hands as they moved over my body.

“You still take my breath away,” he said, looking me up and down. I was lying on my back, as vulnerable as Rhys, even though he still had his clothes on.

He walked over to the end of my bed, grabbed my ankles, and pulled my legs apart. Then he started making his way up them by kissing my skin. When he reached the upper part of my right inner thigh, he started sucking on it like he used to do.

During all the years that we were together, he’d never left a hickey on me anywhere but between my thighs. Not on my neck or any other easily seen place. If he had, we both knew we would’ve heard the grumbling disapprovals of others and didn’t want to deal with them. Rhys just wanted to leave his mark on me as much as I wanted him to.

After leaving one on my skin just now, he rose up onto his hands and knees and began planting kisses on me. The first landed on my lips, and the second was on the diamond piercing on the side of my nose. Rhys then covered my neck, breasts, and stomach—not missing the matching diamond in my belly button.

Once he’d covered my lower abdomen with his soft, tickling kisses, his lips landed on top of my pubic bone. Then he began running his nose back and forth across the trimmed hair.

“Goddamn, the scent of you drives me wild, Riley,” he groaned.

Seconds later, he spread me apart with his fingertips and licked me with his velvety tongue. My pussy felt like it had a heartbeat. It was pulsing. It was also dripping in need of what Rhys would do to me next.

When he began swirling the tip of his tongue around and over my swollen clit, I let out a string of gasps because the sensation was so intense. Then Rhys sucked my clit into his mouth and started finger-fucking me, making my whole body shake.

I’d been chasing my orgasm and was on the verge of catching it when Rhys started flicking my clit with his tongue, sending me over the top. I knotted my fingers in his hair, closed my eyes, and whimpered, feeling as if my body was in a free fall.

When my orgasm ended, I looked down at Rhys. His face was still between my legs, and the lower half was glistening with me on it.

Rhys didn’t speak a word. He only stared at me with his beautiful blue eyes, which said so much. Right now, they were telling me what I already knew: my high school sweetheart had just owned me again by using his tongue and fingers, and he was proud of it.

“You’re not done with me yet, are you?” I whispered.

“No. I still need to feel you deep inside.”

“Then take off your clothes.”

He got up, stood next to my bed, and began stripping down to nothing. Using his sports briefs, he wiped his cum from earlier off himself, no longer seeming embarrassed about what had happened. Just fully a man whose masculinity spoke to every feminine inch of me. So did seeing his erect cock. It was porn-perfect: long, thick, and veined.

When Rhys reached for his jeans on the floor, I told him that he didn’t need a condom because I had an IUD. He nodded, dropped his jeans, and moved his body over the top of mine.

Holding himself up with his strong arms on either side of me and his knees between my legs again, he searched my eyes. “This is going to be the first time I get to feel all of you, Riley.”

“Likewise.”

He leaned his head down and kissed me.

“I can smell and taste myself on you,” I said.

“Your sweet scent and taste are two of many things about you that I can’t get enough of and never will.”

After giving me another deep kiss, Rhys grabbed his cock and lowered it, dragging the tip across my still-swollen clit in the process. Then he started running it up and down the inside of my pussy, wetting himself.

What was happening reminded me of the moment right before I gave my virginity to Rhys when we were sixteen. He was looking at me in the same heated way and touching my body in the same gentle manner, preparing himself to take all of me and me to take all of him.

I suddenly felt nervous because Rhys and I were about to cross a major physical and emotional threshold with each other once again. Things would be different between us once we had. But to what degree?

Although Rhys had said he didn’t care if our having sex messed with his head, I was still concerned about it happening. I wonder if he’d want us to be more than friends after we slept together. I hoped not because I wasn’t ready for that. I didn’t know if I ever would be, either. So much had happened since I came home to Cypress Hills this time, and my heart was tripped up.

As Rhys pushed his hard cock inside me, we both moaned at how good it felt. Then, he started pumping his hips. His touching me so intimately after over a year made my head spin. I felt drunk even though I hadn’t had one drop of wine.

“It feels like you’re inside me as much as I am you,” Rhys whispered.

Hearing his tender words and still looking into his beautiful blue eyes made my emotions begin rising. Not wanting him to see me in this state, I pulled him down on top of me to hide my face. The warmth of his chest on mine made me get even more choked up, but I kept quiet.

Rhys continued fucking me slow and easy, and I fucked him the same. When he began moving his body faster and grunting with every hard thrust of his cock into me, I knew he was about to cum, so I dug my heels into his ass and pulled my nails down his tan back.

“I feel you tightening up,” he breathed into my ear, and I nodded. “Cum with me, baby. Cum with me.”

Baby. The remaining name Rhys used to call me.

Yesterday, while mentioning the other names to him, I purposely hadn’t listed this one because of its sole connection to the sex we used to have. I knew that was why Rhys also hadn’t mentioned it. If either of us had, it would’ve made things awkward. That wasn’t the case any longer, though.

Hearing Rhys call me “baby” again did the trick. I started coming, and he fucked me harder and harder and harder. I was going to feel him every time I walked for the rest of the week.

He came only seconds behind me, lifting his upper body and holding himself up with his arms on either side of my shoulders when it began. Then he closed his eyes, threw his head back, and groaned deep within himself as the veins on the sides of his neck pulsed and his chest heaved for air.

When it was over for him, he looked down at me. That was when I noticed his emotional state. Tears were brimming in his eyes. Then, one landed on my cheek, making mine stream down the sides of my face and into my hair.

The intimacy that Rhys and I had just shared reopened the vault of our deepest feelings toward one another. The only thing I knew to do was hold Rhys, so I pulled him down on top of me again and encircled him with my arms and legs. He was trembling, I was trembling, and we both fell apart even more.

After we’d calmed, Rhys softly kissed me, moved his body down mine, and rested his head on my breasts while I ran my fingers through his hair.

“I was worried about our having sex messing with your head, but it’s messing with mine,” I admitted.

“In what way?”

“It feels like a year and a half ago when everything was perfect between us. Rhys, I don’t know how to navigate these friendship waters with you now. Everything is complicated, and that’s the last thing I wanted.”

He looked up at me. “Things aren’t complicated, Riley. We’re staying on course with being friends.”

“I just thought that—”

“I’d want more with you after we had sex?”

I sighed. “Yes.”

“I can’t lie. I’ll always want you to be mine again, but I’m also logical. I know where you are in your mind and heart after all that’s happened in the past seven days. You’re not ready for anything serious with me and may never be. I’m okay with that, too. I’d rather have you as a friend than not have you at all.”

I outlined his lips with my fingertip and then traced his rugged jawline. “I’ll always be yours to a big degree because of our pasts and also because our hearts are so intertwined.”

Rhys nodded and kept gazing into my eyes. I felt such a sense of peace and security lying here with him like this and talking openly. He’d always been the calm to all of my storms.

“I have a question,” I finally said. “Are we going to keep…you know?”

“Having sex?”

“Yes.”

The corners of Rhys’s mouth curled up. “I wouldn’t object.”

I tried to stifle my laugh, but it was pointless. It came rolling out, and so did Rhys’s.

“I take your question as your desire to keep getting it on with me,” he continued.

“You know I want to.”

“Then tell me.”

“I want to keep getting it on with you.”

“Now tell me why.”

“Because being with you heals me. Because being with you makes me feel alive. Because being with you makes me feel free. Because being with you feels like heaven.”

“You make me feel the same way, whether or not I have sex with you.”

I kissed my fingers and pressed them against Rhys’s lips. He kissed them in return, and then I touched my lips.

“This may be more than you want to know, but Chad never came close to being the kind of lover you’ve always been,” I said, hoping I hadn’t revealed too much.

“I like knowing that. I also like hearing you refer to me as a lover. You’ve never called me that before.”

“Well, you are my lover.”

Rhys’s eyes danced across my face. “You’re mine too.”

“Can I tell you something else about Chad?”

“Tell me anything you want.”

“He was mostly about his sexual gratification and getting it as quickly as possible. Usually in under two minutes.”

Rhys’s eyebrows shot up. “That had to be frustrating for you as a woman.”

“It was. To lessen my frustration, more times than not, I imagined you fucking me instead of Chad. When he was done, I’d go into the bathroom and finish myself off while imagining you again.”

Rhys stared at me for a long moment. “The next time I get you alone, this is what’s going to happen, Riley. I’m going to fuck you like Chad is watching us. I’m going to make you cum repeatedly until you scream for me to stop. Then, I’ll cum.”

When I heard Rhys’s plan, my body flushed with heat, making me tingle from head to toe. I could easily imagine him doing to me exactly as he’d said. It was also easy for me to imagine another thing: Chad watching Rhys fuck me and losing his shit. This was going to be revenge sex at its finest.

Rhys and I woke up in a panic because my parents were due home from their school district jobs at any minute.

“Shit, shit, shit!” I said as we hurried up off my bed.

Rhys’s eyes were frantic. “When did we fall asleep?”

“I don’t know! But my momma and daddy cannot see us coming downstairs together. They’ll know what we did.”

We kept glancing at each other and grinning while rushing to put our clothes back on. What was happening especially felt like old times. We’d nearly been caught like this more than once when we were still a couple. It happened at my parents’ house and Mr. and Mrs. Silverman’s.

Before Rhys and I went downstairs, we straightened my bed and dried the wet spot on the comforter. Then he came up to me, smoothed my hair with his hands, and gave me a quick kiss.

We’d just sat down at the kitchen table when my momma walked into the house through the garage. When she rounded the corner and saw Rhys and me, she smiled and greeted us.

“How was your day?” I asked her.

“Smooth sailing.”

“Good. Where’s Daddy?”

“He’s at a meeting but will be home shortly.”

While my momma was thumbing through the stack of mail Rhys had laid on the counter, I looked at him. We bugged out our eyes at each other and smiled. Then he mentioned the B&Bs. He needed to get them ready for the scheduled renters.

“I’ll walk you out,” I said.

“Okay.”

“Thanks again for lunch.”

“You’re welcome. Enjoy your leftover Irish nachos.”

“Gosh, you know I will!”

After my momma hugged Rhys and told him goodbye, he and I headed for his truck parked in the driveway. When we reached it, he opened the driver-side door and climbed inside the cab. I stood between him and the door, looking up at him as he looked down at me.

“Will you text or call me after you eat supper with your family?” he asked.

“Yes. I kinda like you.”

He smiled. “I kinda like you, too.”

“I really liked hearing you call me ‘baby’ again.”

“Is that so?”

“It is.” I pointed at Rhys’s jeans pocket. “Don’t forget your sports briefs.”

“I won’t. They’re going into the washer when I get home.”

We both paused and stared into each other’s eyes. Rhys’s were sparkling.

“I wish I could kiss you goodbye,” he said.

“Just kiss me twice the next time you see me.”

“When is that going to be?”

“When do you want it to be?”

“Tonight.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

Rhys glanced at my momma and daddy’s house and then reached out and ran his thumb across my bottom lip. We reluctantly said goodbye, but he didn’t pull out of the driveway until I had reached the front door.

I kept watching him, thinking he was about to take off, but he didn’t. He stopped on the street, rolled down his driver-side window, and looked at me. Instinctively, I knew what he was thinking about doing but didn’t know if he’d do it, considering our relationship status. It was making heart-hands at me.

Rhys started doing that after telling me he loved me the first time. Whenever we parted ways, he’d flash his hands and dimpled smile, making me melt on every occasion.

I walked back to the edge of the porch and shrugged my shoulders. Then came Rhys’s hands in the shape of a heart and his smile. I grinned, thinking to myself how adorable he was. I also thought about him telling me he was still in love with me the other day while he and I sat on his patio.

Reminding me with his hands that his heart still belonged to me just now wasn’t surprising. He had always been transparent, and I knew he would keep reminding me of his feelings toward me. Our friend-lover relationship status didn’t matter.

I waved at him and he drove off. After returning to the house, I stood in the foyer, processing my complicated and overwhelming feelings toward him.

Knowing my momma was waiting for me to rejoin her so that she and I could chat more, I took a deep breath and headed her way. When I walked into the kitchen, I saw her sitting at the table, sipping on a glass of tea.

“It sure was sweet of Rhys to take you to lunch,” she said, grinning at me.

“Yeah, it was.”

“Are y’all going to do that again?”

“We haven’t talked about it or any other plans. Just going with the flow.”

“Before your daddy gets home, you might want to get those feathers out of your hair.”

I looked down at it. “What feathers?”

My momma got up from the table, stepped over to me, and twirled her finger for me to turn around. Once I had, I felt her gently tug on my hair.

“Here you go,” she said, handing me three little white feathers.

My cheeks bloomed bright red because they’d come from the pillows on my bed. My momma knew Rhys and I had done more than hang out in the kitchen after eating lunch at Gallagher’s.

“I-I don’t know what to say,” I whispered, mortified.

“Honey, you’re a grown woman, and Rhys is a grown man. But tell me something. Now that you two have been intimate again, where does it leave y’all?”

“Right where we are. We’re just friends.”

“You and Rhys having sex is going to complicate matters.”

“No, it isn’t. He and I discussed it, and we’re on the same page. We have no expectations. We’re just enjoying each other’s company while I’m in town.”

“When you leave, will you and Rhys stay in touch?”

“I hope so.”

My momma nodded and then pointed at the counter. “You have some mail over there.”

I walked over to the stack and thumbed through it. Chad’s card was at the bottom.