Chapter 38 Rem
REM
Lena pushes pasta around her plate but doesn’t eat.
“You said you were hungry, piccolina.”
“Yeah, well,” she answers caustically, “lots of people say lots of things, it doesn’t mean they’re all true.” Almost immediately she gives me a sad smile. “Sorry, Rem, I’m just—”
“Freaking the fuck out? Feeling like the world has been flipped upside down? Overwhelmed by the insanity that is your life right now?”
“Yes, to all of the above.” She stabs a single piece of pasta with her fork, pops it into her mouth, chewing elaborately for my benefit. A drop of sauce lingers on her lower lip. I reach across the kitchen island, wipe it away with my thumb. Suck it clean.
Flustered, Lena grabs her napkin and swipes her mouth. “Um, thanks.”
“No problem.”
We left Aldo’s office not long after he made his declaration about Ari. More like we were evicted. My uncle said he had work to do and that I needed to follow through on my promises to Lena: food and rest.
This late at night the kitchen is quiet. Aldo’s staff went to sleep long ago. We have it all to ourselves, no prying eyes or ears as Lena eats—well, pokes at—the carbonara I made her. “It tastes better when it’s hot.”
With a sigh, Lena eats a few more bites then pushes the plate away. “It is good, Rem, thank you. I’m just not hungry anymore.”
“Yeah.” I look at her practically full plate. “Me neither.”
The pendant lights over the kitchen island throw a warm glow into the room.
The kitchen is restaurant-quality and enormous, large enough to handle a full cooking staff and the various men who are always wandering through to grab a meal.
But with the only light coming from the hanging fixtures above us, it feels like we’re in our own private bubble.
A quiet pocket away from the rest of the world.
Lena breaks the silence first. “So, um, are we going to talk about all of that?” She waves her hand in the direction of Aldo’s office.
“Which part? About you being Aldo’s daughter? About him not knowing about the hit ordered on you? Or the part where he thinks Ari is trying to kill you?” My mouth tastes like metal. A sickening combination of betrayal and rage.
Lena’s only answer is a pained fuck.
“Yeah. Exactly.” I scrub a hand down my face, wishing I could wipe away the last hour.
“I can’t begin to understand what it must be like for you to learn about Aldo and your birth mom.
I don’t think that’s something you can process quickly, and you shouldn’t have to.
To have your entire origin story dumped on your lap like that… ” I trail off.
Lena doesn’t miss a beat. “By a guy we both thought, until very recently, wanted me dead. Not just that. By the guy who is my husband’s adoptive uncle and surrogate father.” Lena plants her palms on the counter, bracing herself against the insanity of it. “That’s just un-fucking-believable.”
Whether due to emotion or stress, or maybe both, Lena is trembling.
She’s dressed the same as when she left the penthouse earlier, a soft sweater over faded jeans, her thick dark hair in loose curls over her shoulders and down her back.
She’s gorgeous, and exhausted. Dark smudges shadow her eyes and her cheeks have lost their usual rosy color.
Coming to her side of the island, I stand behind her, placing my hands on her shoulders. “We don’t need to talk about this now,” I murmur. “All of it can wait until tomorrow, after we both get some sleep.”
Lena sighs. “No, not all of it can.” She turns in my hands, resting her palms on my chest. “What about you? What Aldo said about Ari…do you think he’s right?”
I want to scream No, but the word won’t come out. Instead, I cling to logic, try to rationally pick apart why my brother would do something like that. “Why would he? Outside of the Pagano shit, which is clearly fabricated, what motive does he possibly have for wanting you dead?”
Lena rubs small circles on my chest. It’s not lost on me that she’s offering me comfort while we’re discussing the real possibility that my brother is trying to kill her.
“I don’t know, Rem, but setting aside motive for a second—does the rest of it track?
Everything about the conversation we just had in Aldo’s office implies your uncle had no idea what Ari was doing.
Aldo said it himself—he didn’t know anything about me specifically, a woman named Lena Haywood, until Agata connected me to Maria’s necklace.
He hadn’t heard my name until that moment.
So, he couldn’t have been part of the entire Pagano conspiracy theory or the one ordering you to kill me. That all came from Ari.”
Lena is connecting the dots, drawing a picture as infuriating as it is horrific.
Especially when I realize: “I never discussed you, your alleged connection to the Paganos, or the hit with Aldo directly. He left for Italy before the issue came up and, while he was away, my conversations with him were limited to the search for Maria. He trusted Ari and I to run the rest of the business while he was dealing with his own matters in San Luca.”
No matter how much I want to deny that Ari is behind all of this, I can’t stop the details from making sense.
Can’t stop piecing together the puzzle now that we’ve started.
“I just assumed that Ari was telling the truth about Aldo’s orders and involvement.
I didn’t have any reason not to believe Ari.
I’ve always trusted him, Lena. He’s my older brother, my family.
We’ve watched each other’s back, protected each other for as long as I can remember. If I can’t trust him…”
I can’t finish the thought, a crippling pain in my chest making it hard to think.
Lena goes up on her tiptoes, wrapping her arms around my neck.
I tug her close, crushing her in a hug and burying my face in her neck.
One deep breath. Two. Her scent trickles through my airways and slowly the clamp around my ribs lessens just enough that I can inhale properly.
“Your brother must really hate me,” she murmurs.
“Non ne posso più! He doesn’t have any reason to!
How are you a threat to him? Seriously, Lena—what could you have possibly done to make Ari fabricate evidence of crimes against our family, lie to me about Aldo ordering a hit, and go behind my back to try to kill you when I refused?
” I pull back, clasping her face in my hands, searching her features as if I’ll find the truth stamped there. “Why the hell would Ari want you dead?”
“Because—” Lena stops. I can practically see her weighing and measuring all the secrets and lies that have been exposed today. “What if he wants me dead because I’m Aldo’s daughter?”
I stare at her, dumbfounded.
“Back when this whole thing started, no one knew I was related to Aldo. No one in your family knew he and Maria had had a kid. So, the biggest hole in that theory is: how would he know? But, say, somehow, Ari figured it out before anyone else—would that be a good enough reason? Would a surprise daughter, a child related to Aldo by blood, be a threat to Ari?”
I don’t have to think before answering, “Yes.” That corrosive metallic taste in my mouth gets even worse.
“As Aldo’s daughter, you trump everyone else as heir to his fortune, his business, his position as head of the Family.
Before you, Ari was set to take the role as capo when Aldo retired, a job Ari has craved since we were teenagers.
But now, if Aldo’s claim that you’re his child is true, everything Ari’s been working toward for decades is in jeopardy.
You could be the biggest threat he’s ever faced in his life.
That’s a pretty solid motive for murder. ”
For a moment, we just look at each other. The truth—if that’s what it is—is catastrophic. For me, my brother, Lena and Aldo, our entire family. The kind of shit that can tear us all down. The kind of shit that will get some of us killed.
“Che cazzo.” The harder the truth hits home the more violently I curse. “If Ari really uncovered that you’re Aldo’s daughter, he could easily want you dead. Especially if he was able to kill you before Aldo tracked you down.”
My brother is trying to murder my wife.
The person I trust most in the world is trying to kill the one I love most.
I don’t realize I’ve sagged against Lena until I feel her hands running up and down my spine, her voice soft in my ear. I wrap my arms around her hips, fisting her sweater at her lower back, dizzy from the war waging in my head. “I’m so sorry, mia amata. For everything. I’m just so fucking sorry.”
I don’t have the right words to make up for everything that has happened to Lena since my family invaded her life. There aren’t enough apologies in English and Italian combined to make up for how the Cerretis have burned her world to the ground.
Lena runs her fingers through my hair, murmuring sounds of comfort as I shake in her arms. Slowly, the noise in my brain fades.
The ability to think returns. I reluctantly pull away, cutting myself off from Lena’s warmth as I say what needs to be said.
“I’ll get you out of here. Somewhere safe. Tonight.”
“What?”
“By sunrise you’ll be somewhere Ari will never find you.
Come on.” I wave toward the door, not trusting myself to touch her and let go again.
“We have to get you somewhere safe, away from my family, as fast as possible. Now that Aldo’s back and he’s aware of what’s been going on, things are going to get unspeakably hellish for everyone.
You need to be as far away from the carnage as possible.
Come, piccola, let’s get your stuff and—”
“No.”
“What?”
“No,” Lena repeats, jaw set. “I’m not leaving.”
“You have to. You said it yourself. It makes sense, Lena. Now more so than ever. We have to get you as far away from here as possible. I’ll get you a new identity, a new place to live, a new life. Anything you want, as long as it’s away from here.”
“You’re not listening to me, Rem.”
“No, you’re the one who isn’t listening.
” I’m practically growling, my fear for her safety like talons ripping me from the inside out.
“If Ari is behind everything that’s happened, our family is about to go through the bloodiest fucking war we’ve ever seen.
No one will be safe. I won’t be able to keep you safe.
The only way we can keep you alive is if we get you the fuck out of here.
So get your sweet ass in line and do as you’re told.
For once.” I grab her hands, caving into the need to touch her one last time. “Please, amore mio. Please.”
Lena looks up at me. Seconds tick by. Then, she tips her chin in the most subtle, powerful look of defiance I’ve ever seen.
I want to kiss her as much as I want to scream.
Because, before she says anything, I know that, yet again, my defiant little one is not going to be pushed around. Least of all by me.
“I’m not leaving, Rem.”
“Lena—”
“Stop. Just stop and listen.” She pulls me forward until her breasts brush my chest, physically grounding me to her.
“I can’t pretend I can make sense of how I’ve gotten here, of how I went from being a broke music student with few friends and almost no family to being the most popular girl on every hitman’s to-do list.” I groan and Lena gives me a weak smile.
“But,” she says, “no matter how insane my life has become, I have to be honest with myself about at least one thing. That, for better or worse, I’ve also gained something I’ve never had before: someone willing to fight for me, to stand beside me, to protect me and love me, no matter what.
For the first time in my adult life, I feel like I’m not on my own.
And that’s not something I’m giving up without a fight. ”
I stare down at Lena, dumbfounded. She touches one finger to the corner of my mouth, a promise of a caress that lights up my veins.
“You’re my family, Rem. You’re mine just as much as I’m yours. I love you. And I’m not giving you up without a fight.”