Thirty-Five
Kaiden
The past couple of months with Aspen and Kai have been as close to perfect as I could hope for.
My wife is still a little skittish. Still a little commitment shy, but between my son and I, we’re slowly eroding the sharp edges of her suspicion and doubt.
I don’t blame her for being cautious when everything in my past screams beware.
Still, I’ve regained my place in her bed, and Kai’s happy acceptance of our relationship seems to be enough for her to give us a chance. That’s a chance I grasp hold of and run with, and will continue to nurture until she knows, without a doubt, that I’ll never let go again.
This time, my wife and child will have to be pried out of my cold, dead hands. And while Aspen might imagine that to be a distinct possibility, I plan to live a long and happy life from here on out.
Thankfully, Mika seems content to allow me all the time I need to solidify my relationship with Aspen before I orchestrate the meeting between the two of them. I guess it was a good thing I confided our marital status to him.
I’m grateful for his patience. More grateful than he’ll ever know.
The last thing I need right now, while things are in such a fragile status quo, is to spring my boss’s not-so-innocent interest in her artwork on her.
I’m still uncertain exactly what he wants with her, although it’s not rocket science to put two and two together and come up with money laundering through Aspen’s paintings.
What I can’t work out is why he wants to connect with her.
Normally, the artist never has any idea their work is being used to clean illicit funds.
The pieces are bought through galleries or dealers, by shell companies and offshore trusts.
Layers of careful, confidential transactions through several third-party intermediaries with items changing hands without the artist ever being any the wiser.
Or maybe I’m completely off track, and his interests have more to do with Milo. Does Mika also suspect the teenager is his half-brother? Is that what this is about?
But then, why not approach Helene?
On second thought, Aspen’s mother would never entertain such an approach, so perhaps Aspen is the obvious choice if he’s digging for information.
I push the thoughts aside. There’s no point in speculating.
All I can do is ensure the situation doesn’t compromise my relationship with her.
That’s where I draw the line. It may not be the line the higher-ups want to see, but my family is my priority, and I’ll do whatever it takes to ensure that, even if it means going head-to-head with the syndicate.
Not that I think it’ll come to that. Mika has a much more forward-thinking approach to the business than the Dons of old.
I’m banking on his progressive mindset now more than ever.
My phone buzzes on the kitchen counter, pulling me from my thoughts.
I’m helping Aspen make breakfast. Pancakes, because Kai requested them with an enthusiasm that makes it impossible to refuse, and because there’s something about this oh-so-normal domesticity that makes me feel like maybe I’m finally getting this right.
I reach for it, but not before Aspen reads Kitty’s name as it lights up on the screen.
She says nothing, but the tightening of her features and the way she presses her lips together tells me she’s noticed, and she’s not happy about it.
I swipe to dismiss the notification without reading it, keeping my attention on the pancakes that are starting to bubble on the griddle.
“Just work stuff,” I say lightly, even though I’m aware any mention of Kitty has become a sore point ever since Aspen pushed me to talk about the women, or lack thereof, in the years we’ve been apart.
I knew that conversation would cause problems, but Aspen is reading far too much into it. It’s true, I’m fond of Kitty. We’ve been through a damn lot together, and I consider her a friend; one of the very few people I truly trust.
I suppose a bond was created between us the moment we both were forced into intimacy by the Viper. I could have said no. I’d have taken the beating, but I didn’t want that for Kitty. She reminded me too much of Aspen, and over the years we’ve become… something.
It would surprise a lot of people to know she’s the only woman I’ve had sex with other than my wife. In another life, we might have meant more to each other, but not while the ghost of my one true love lived as a possibility in my soul.
I hesitate in trying to explain that to Aspen, though, because I doubt she’d understand, and I don’t want to make things any worse.
I’m very aware that I’m walking on eggshells; considering every word, every action, anything I say and do. Honestly, it’s exhausting… but worth it if it eases Aspen’s mind. I don’t want there to be anything that makes her believe I’m not one hundred percent committed to her and Kai.
My family.
Considering my past, Aspen, of all people, should know how much family means to me. Mine’s been stolen from me repeatedly.
It’s not happening again. Not now. Not ever.
I refuse to be denied any longer, and I will destroy anyone who tries to stand in my way.
When breakfast is finished, I try to surreptitiously check my phone. Kitty doesn’t text for the hell of it, so I’m already antsy from leaving her message this long.
I slip it from my pocket and angle myself away from Aspen’s line of sight while Kai chatters about some video game he wants. The message from Kitty is brief, but it sends ice through my veins.
Need to see you. Please get here as soon as you can.
And of course, Aspen spots me and narrows her eyes.
Fuck!
But if Kitty is sending a message like this, it’s urgent.
It’s also my job. As much as I’ve delegated in order to spend time with Aspen and Kai, some things have to be dealt with in person, and I’ve been lax about that lately.
Looks like I’m going to pay for it.
With a sigh, I stack the dishwasher and head upstairs to change my clothes. I’ve gotten used to dressing down, so to speak. My usual business attire of suit and tie getting less and less wear.
“I need to work for a little while,” I tell Aspen when she follows me into the bedroom, where more and more of my clothes have been finding their way into her closet.
Grabbing the one suit I have here, a relatively new one that’s been properly tailored to fit, rather than the ill-fitting off-the-rack items Vito used to supply, which always hung awkwardly on my muscled frame, I empty my pockets and head into the ensuite bathroom.
“How long will you be?” Aspen asks from the other room.
“I don’t know.” I have to raise my voice over the noise of the shaver.
She’s quiet, and I’m not sure if her silence is a good or bad thing.
Poking my head back around the door to judge, I frown as Aspen startles as if she was doing something she shouldn’t.
I finish getting ready quickly, the familiar weight of my shoulder holster settling into place beneath the expertly tailored jacket, which renders it invisible.
“Well, I guess we’ll see you later then,” she says hurriedly as she heads for the door.
I’m still trying to piece together her response when she looks back, and the expression on her face makes me pause. It’s pleading and vulnerable, and it guts me to know she’s still so uncertain of her place in my life.
I reach her in two quick strides and pull her into my arms. “I’ll be back as soon as I can,” I promise, holding her tight and tipping her chin up for a kiss. Capturing her lips and pouring all the emotion I feel into it, hoping she’ll feel what she refuses to believe in words.
She melts against me for a moment before pulling back, her seafoam eyes searching mine. For honesty? For commitment? I don’t know if she’ll recognize them, but she certainly won’t find anything else.
“I love you,” I remind her, even though Aspen never says it back.
Instead, she presses her lips together like she’s holding something in. “Be safe,” she finally says, reluctantly moving away.
“Always am,” I reply, though we both know that’s not her real worry.
Her real worry is Kitty. But since she refuses to accept my assurances, all I can do is prove myself by being here.
I really hope whatever Kitty wants isn’t too serious.
But because the universe can’t seem to stop meddling, my hopes fall on deaf ears.