Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
AHKEEM
I fucked up.
I fucking snapped, and there was no coming back from it.
Brooke and I had our fights, but it never got to the point where I ended up in handcuffs.
She always knew what to say and what to do to trigger me.
She knew Saphir was my fucking kryptonite, which was why she insisted on using my son as a pawn whenever she felt like it.
As much as I used to bad mouth her behavior while she was in front of Saphir, now I was no better.
I allowed my anger to take over and show my son a side of me he didn’t even know existed.
I didn’t want him thinking what I did was okay. I put my hands on his mother. It immediately turned me into a hypocrite because I spent so much time teaching him how to be his mother’s protector and to never disrespect women, only for me to do the complete opposite.
I sat in a holding cell all day thinking about how awful of a father I had been.
The shootout at the church had me feeling like shit.
My son was fucking traumatized because of it.
Jazzlyn suggested that I keep him from school, just for a few days, but Saphir assured me he was fine.
I wish I listened to Jazzy when I had the chance.
If I had, Saphir wouldn’t have been triggered in school when his teacher accidentally dropped her clipboard.
The loud noise instantly took him back to the drive-by, and he opened up about it to his school counselor.
I wasn’t planning on telling Brooke shit.
I just knew she was going to use the situation as a reason to take Saphir away from me.
Had she brought her concerns about his safety and wellbeing to me like an adult, she wouldn’t have gotten snatched up, and I wouldn’t have gotten locked up.
My bail was posted immediately, and I was processed out the next day. I could only imagine how worried Saphir was. My anger got the best of me, and I snapped. Brooke always pushed this narrative to have my son thinking I was the bad guy. I fell right into her bullshit.
My wife wasn’t answering any of my calls, so I knew she was pissed.
I got in contact with Jersey, and after he laughed his ass off over the phone, he handled up and posted my bond.
If it was up to my wife, I knew she would have let me sit for a little while longer just to teach me a lesson.
I ain’t gonna lie. I fucking deserved it.
“You look like shit,” Jersey laughed as I slid into the passenger seat of his car.
I smacked my lips. “Fuck up.”
“You and that baby mama gone end up on an episode of Snapped if y’all don’t get y’all shit together.”
“I’ll probably smile in my fucking mugshot again,” I muttered while shaking my head.
“Y’all did all that fighting in front of wifey?”
A deep sigh drifted out of me. “Yeah, son. She not fucking with me at all right now.”
“I would hate to be your stupid ass right now.”
I cut my eyes at him as he laughed like the drama in my life was some funny-ass movie he was watching play out.
I loved my son with everything in me, but the day I nutted inside Brooke was the worst day of my fucking life.
It was like she was placed into my life solely to give me hell.
I was sure if I told her today that I would be divorcing Jazzy and that I wanted to work a relationship out with her, she would clean up her act.
It was fucked up how she did shit out of spite just because I didn’t want to be with her.
Once we arrived at my penthouse, I dapped Jersey up and thanked him for coming through for me.
“Good luck in there, nigga. Remember to duck and dodge. Sis got a mean-ass right hook.” He cackled obnoxiously as I slammed his door. “Aye, nigga! Your jailbird ass better off not slamming my shit! I could’ve let your ass sit in there!”
I stuck him my middle finger as I got onto the elevator.
Once the elevator doors glided open, I stepped inside the penthouse, looking around for my wife and son.
As I furthered down the hall, I heard music being blasted from the room we converted into a private gym space.
Jazzy always had a nice body, but two years ago, we really locked in at the gym, and now she worked out every chance she got.
The door was wide open, and I could see her running on the treadmill in her sports bra and leggings.
She had her back facing me as she overlooked the view from the wide pane windows as she continued to run.
If I was in her good graces, I would’ve slapped her on her ass, turned the treadmill off, and had her bent over, but I knew I had to approach with caution.
I walked over to the speaker she had Cardi B blasting from and turned it off.
While still keeping up her speed on the treadmill, she looked over her shoulder at me.
I ain’t never seen her so unhappy to see me through the entire length of our relationship.
“Hey, Alexa, resume music!” She paid me dust.
I didn’t know what the fuck I was expecting. She straight up told me if I got locked up, I would have issues with her.
The music resumed, and she continued running. I cut the music off again; this time, she decided to stop the treadmill. She grabbed her towel and wiped away her sweat before drinking some of her water.
“You did our morning workout without me?” I asked while eyeing her up and down.
“Yeah ‘cause I stayed up all night comforting our worried son while you were bending over and coughing to make sure you weren’t smuggling shit inside the jail.”
“That was foul, Lovey.” I shook my head.
She slammed her water jug down while scoffing.
“No, you wanna know what’s foul? Doing what you did in front of your fucking son.
I told your ass to calm down and just think, but fuck what I say.
Right? The drive-by, you couldn’t control that.
But strangling his fucking mother then getting taken away in handcuffs is on fucking you, Ahkeem.
If you’re looking for a bitch to make excuses for the shit you pulled yesterday, you married the wrong one. ”
I made my way over to her. She was sitting on the weight bench, and I got on my knees in front of her. “Get your stupid ass up, Ahkeem,” she snapped with her arms folded against her chest.
I shook my head. “Get however you feel off your chest. I know I fucked up. When you done, I’m still gone be here to apologize.”
“I ain’t the one you should be apologizing to.”
“You’re a start. I should’ve fucking listened to you, Lovey.
I was too heated, and I let that shit consume me.
I been going back and forth with shorty for a minute now, and I lost my fucking cool the one time I should’ve kept it.
” I wrapped my arms around her. My little tactic wasn’t working for me as well as I thought it would.
She kept her mean mug on her face and brushed my hands off her.
Her face screwed up in disgust. “You smell like jail.”
“Ain’t nobody said that shit to you when I picked you up from your bid.” I screwed my face up right back at her.
“I went to jail for popping a nigga, and I’ll do it the fuck again if you keep on being stupid.”
I took heed to her threat ‘cause I really couldn’t put much past her. She was sporadic as fuck and really would bust a cap off in my ass. “My fault, Lovey. I’ll listen to my wife from now on.”
She smirked. “Forever?”
“Forever.”
I leaned in for a kiss, and she pulled away. “Not too motherfuckin’ fast, you hot breath jail bird.”
“Damn! It’s like that now?”
“Very much so. Go clean up.”
I got up. “Blue still sleep?”
“Yes, and I would love for you to let him sleep. He’s been up all night worried sick about you. You really scared him, Ahk.”
“I know that. We probably won’t have him for a while after this. Brooke gone do whatever to hurt me.”
“It shouldn’t be like that.” She shook her head.
“You guys gotta get it together. Blue shouldn’t witness all this shit go down between you two.
Y’all don’t have to be friends, but at least have some sort of respect for each other and enough decency to not let shit go down in front of him.
You can’t point the finger only at her. You played a part in this as well.
She may be petty a lot of the times, but I think she was genuinely concerned about Blue yesterday.
She had to find out her son was in a drive-by from his guidance counselor.
Same way you want her to be transparent with you about everything involving him, you have to do the same. It’s only right.”
Hearing the shit my wife was telling me was rough, but I knew I deserved it. She was keeping it real, and I needed to hear that shit. Not having a solid-ass woman in your corner could definitely be a nigga’s downfall. Luckily for me, I had that. I just needed to fucking listen when she spoke.
“I hear you, Lovey. I’m gone make shit right with Brooke.”
“You better before she files for full custody. I love Blue like I made him. I can’t imagine not being able to see him.”
She wasn’t one of them evil-ass stepmoms who was mean and unfair. I watched her love on and accept Blue like he was hers. From the outside looking in, people always assumed that she was Blue’s mother based off the way they interacted. I was forever grateful for that.
Knowing Brooke, her ass had already hit up her lawyer and was looking into disputing the current terms of custody—the same lawyer she had on payroll because I was shooting her mad money and assuming she was using it for my son.
It was no secret that once I found out Saphir was mine, Brooke’s whole life upgraded.
Jazzy and I lived a certain type of lifestyle that I didn’t want to deprive my son of when he went over to his mother’s house.
I got her a nice brownstone and even gave her a Mercedes fresh off my dealership’s lot.
She was living good off my son and still found it in her spirit to be an evil-ass bitch.
I thanked my wife for holding it down with our son while I was in jail.
I did as she told me and got cleaned up.
That jailhouse smell wasn’t nothing to fucking play with.
Even after I showered and got dressed, Blue was still sleep, which meant he went to bed late as hell worried about me.
I went into his room and gazed at him for a little minute.
I loved him with everything in me, and there wasn’t shit I wouldn’t do to keep him happy and safe.
I appreciated the fact that we skipped the whole toddler-bed phase and got him a queen-sized bed.
I got in next to him and pulled him into my arms. He shuffled around a little bit before growing comfortable in my arms. I kissed all over his face, and he managed to wake up.
Upon seeing me, his eyes widened, and he threw his arms around me.
“Daddy!” He squeezed me as tight as he could.
I chuckled. “What’s good, Blue?”
“Are you okay? You’re not mad anymore, right?”
“Nah, man. I’m good. I wanted to apologize to you.”
“Okay.” The fact that he didn’t ask why I wanted to apologize let me know that he knew what I did was dead-ass wrong.
I sighed deeply before maneuvering him so he was laying on my chest just like he used to when he was a baby.
“Me putting my hands on your mother was and will always be unacceptable. I was angry, but there are better ways to communicate than getting physical. I don’t want you thinking what I did was okay just because I’m your dad.
What I did was wrong, which is why I went to jail. ”
“Was it scary?”
“It’s a place I don’t ever wanna see you go, so hell yeah, it was scary.
” Whatever I had to say to get him to pick a path better than mine was what I was gonna do.
“But it ain’t about that right now, Blue.
I want you to be better than me, and that means you can never do the same stuff I did.
I promise you I’m gonna work on the way I treat your mother and talk to her.
At the end of the day, I want you to have the utmost respect for her.
She loves you, and despite our differences, she’s a good mom. ”
“I love Mommy too.”
I smiled before dropping a kiss on top of his head.
“Good. I don’t know how things are gonna go with me and your mom, but just know I love you more than life itself.
I’m always thinking about ways to be better for you or give you a better life.
You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.
Being your dad is the only thing I need in life. ”
“I love you too, Daddy.”
He may have forgiven me, but I was still working on forgiving myself for what I put him through. It was a work in progress.