13. #2
I knew that wasn’t realistic, though. I’d been married before and vividly remembered some of the things about my ex that made me crazy.
There were times when the sound of his breathing pissed me off, and don’t even get me started on what he sounded like when he chewed.
God, and when he sneezed? I shuddered at the thought and yanked myself back to the here and now.
Yes, Zane was doing all the right things, but if I had a brain in my head, I would realize that couldn’t last forever.
I had a feeling that his sister and some of their friends could tell me stories that would put him in a more realistic light for me.
I wondered when I’d meet them. Hopefully, it would be sooner rather than later because it was getting very difficult to see the world around me for what it really was with all these stars in my eyes.
Once we crossed the street and Zane caught sight of us, he headed our way with a big smile on his face. The young woman with him seemed confused and hesitant, but the second Zane called out my name, her expression changed to shock.
Zane pulled me into his arms for a hug and a quick peck on the lips - something I wasn’t sure I was comfortable with yet. I mean, I’d just been thinking about how happy I was that he seemed okay with not having public displays of affection, yet here we were.
As if he’d read my mind, he whispered, “He didn’t even notice. He’s too busy staring at my cousin.”
I glanced over at my brother, and sure enough, the beautiful young woman who was shaking his hand had him mesmerized.
“Were you guys having ice cream?” Zane asked.
“Yes. I pulled Dayton out of school a little early so we could hang out.”
“How did that go?”
“It went great! Even better than I’d hoped.”
“Good,” Zane said as he hugged me again.
My eyes closed as he held me in his arms, and I sighed as I opened my eyes, ready to pull away and ask him . . . something. Whatever I’d been about to say went right out the window when my eyes landed on the shell of a vehicle I saw attached to his tow truck.
“Holy shit,” I whispered in shock.
Zane pulled back far enough to look down at my face before he asked, “What’s wrong?”
“That’s my car,” I said in a weak voice.
“What?” Zane asked as he turned around and followed my gaze. “Are you sure? We haven’t had a chance to run the VIN yet.”
“I know it’s mine.”
“Honey, it’s been stripped. How can you tell?”
“The crack in the windshield came from Beau and Leo. They couldn’t find their baseball and wanted to practice batting, so they used river rocks from the front flower bed,” I said sadly, even though the memory of the look on the boys’ faces when they realized what they’d done was pretty comical.
“When it cracked, Alana said it looked like a shark. Every time I looked at it, I couldn’t decide whether to be proud of Beau for getting such a good hit and Alana for having such a great imagination or mad because I really needed to get the damn thing replaced. ”
“Shit,” I heard Dayton whisper loudly. I looked over and saw him staring at the vehicle with tears in his eyes before he looked my way. “I’m so sorry, Courtney!”
“I’ll run the VIN to make sure, and then I’ll get in touch with the cops,” Zane said as he squeezed my shoulders, his big hands trying so hard to comfort me gently. “You guys can go, and I’ll call you to let you know what they say.”
“Thanks.”
“I’m sorry, babe.”
“It’s not your fault, and it’s not really Dayton’s fault either, but I know exactly whose fault it is.
” I gave Zane a peck before I walked over and extended my hand toward my brother.
He took it and followed me back across the street to my new SUV, but I could feel him looking back at the discarded body of my old one a couple of times.
Once we had gotten in, I started it up and then reached across the console and took his hand.
“Dayton, this isn’t your fault. Yes, it’s true that you shouldn’t have taken my car, but she shouldn’t have convinced you to do it. ”
“She said that her friend . . . She told me it was okay and . . . How could she do this to us, Courtney?”
“Baby, I hate that this is happening right now because I’d like nothing more than to let you believe that everyone has some good in them. Unfortunately, this is the perfect example of what can happen when you let Jill into your world.”
“She knew that was your car, and that’s how you got us around to where we needed to be.”
“Right, but she didn’t think about that.
She only thought of the money she could get for it and never even considered the repercussions that would have.
She didn’t consider how much trouble you might be in for taking it without permission or driving without a license.
She didn’t think about how hard it would make our lives to be without a vehicle or how much it would cost for us to get a new one. She only thought about herself.”
“How could she do that?”
“Sweetie, I’m going to make a comparison here, and I want you to really consider what I’m saying, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Remember how our SUV looked before? It was clean, dependable, and always full of singing and laughter. We even took several trips in that car. Remember when we went to the movies and Alana ate too much popcorn and then threw up all over you on the way home? She was screaming, you were screaming, and the boys started screaming. That lady at the red light thought I was murdering all of you!”
“She called the cops on us!”
I giggled before I said, “Remember how that cop kept trying not to retch?”
Dayton laughed and then shook his head as he gagged at the memory. “It was so gross.”
“We have a million memories of our time together in that thing, but all it took was letting Jill in just a little and now look at it. It’s nothing like it was.” I squeezed Dayton’s hand before I said, “That’s what she’ll do to your life if you let her.”
“She’s done this to you before.”
His sad voice wasn’t asking anything. He was making a statement. As horrible as it was to rip away his hope of having Jill in our lives, I knew that the only way to save him from even more heartbreak was to make him see the truth.
“She’s done so many things like this that I can’t even list them all. In just the little time that you’ve been in contact with her lately, look at all the things she conned you into doing and all that you’ve lost because of her lies.”
“I believed her.”
“I know, honey, because I’ve made sure that you’ve had a life filled with laughter and happiness.
I tried so hard to make sure you weren’t jaded like me and the older boys, Dayton.
Ben, Liam, and I - and even Dawson - have done everything in our power to keep you and the other kids from knowing what it’s like to live like we did when we were kids, but unfortunately you know now anyway. ”
“I’m sorry I doubted you and said all those horrible things, Court.”
“I forgive you, Dayton, and I’m sorry you had to learn this lesson. I just hope you don’t let her pull you in again.”
“I won’t,” Dayton assured me. “She’s never going to be the mom I want her to be.”
“No, baby, she’s not.”
I sat back in my seat and squeezed his hand before I let it go so I could put the SUV in gear, and I managed to hold in my own tears until I heard his first sniffle.
And, as family does, we cried together for a little while and then put our shoulders back to face the rest of the day with the knowledge that we could make it through whatever else life decided to throw at us if we could just stick together.
And while I did that for the millionth time in my life, I plotted my mother’s painfully slow and horrific death.