34 Lactose Intolerant
“Isobel?” Jace's voice had my head snapping up. The one eye that isn't swollen shut is blinking, like he’s trying to force clarity back into his vision
“I'm here.” I move into his line of sight. “Do you need water?”
“Please.”
I grab the cup the nurse left and guide the straw to his lips.
“Thank you.” He rests his head back against the pillows.
“Of course.” I set the cup on the tray, running my hands down myself.
The silence stretches, full of everything we’re not saying.
“So…” I shove my hands in my back pockets, “I'm glad you're okay.”
“Thanks to you.”
The anger that's been dormant since he collapsed flares back to life.
“Actually, don't you think Lucian would be the one to thank?” My voice hardens.
The chasm seems to grow between us. Jace exhales slowly.
“I knew you’d be mad.” He at least has the decency to look sheepish.
“You're damn right, I’m livid.” I throw my hands up, voice rising. “You went off without talking to us, AGAIN!”
“I told Lucian it needed to look realistic. Gideon is too careful. He was never going to go for it if it didn't look right.”
“That's not the point, Jace.” I take a steadying breath. “The point is, you didn’t bother to tell us. It doesn't matter that you told Lucian, because it's not you telling us.”
“But it worked!” He winces as he shifts upright, stubborn even in pain. “Gideon is now in Guild custody. His empire is in shambles, and now we can focus on Daniel and your mom. He doesn’t have Gideon’s money bankrolling him. It should be easier to find him.”
I study him. He believes every word, truly believing that the logic shields him. But it's just not enough.
“Results don’t erase the process,” I shoot back. “If someone runs a study using shady methods, the outcome doesn’t magically make it ethical.
“You still came for me, though,” Jace points out.
“Well, of course I did. I can be furious with you and still care.”
His shoulders sag, some invisible tension releasing.
“Please, Isobel, I did this for you. You've seen now what Gideon is capable of, what I've sacrificed to keep you safe.” He reaches for me, slow and hopeful. “Please, come back to me, let me make up for all my mistakes.”
I stare at his hand, reaching for me. The hand that held mine when I cried over Tex, the hand that cupped my face while we kissed, the hand that placed me in Gideon's clutches for five months.
“I can't.” I lift my eyes to his.
Jace's face falls, “What?”
“I can't,” I repeat, eyes burning with tears, “I can't just… pretend like everything’s okay between us. You broke us, Jace. You broke the trust we built. Some part of me was really starting to fall in love with you, maybe that part will always be there, but I can't trust you.”
“Is—”
“No, please let me finish.” My voice wavers, heart splintering in my chest. “I can't trust you to talk to me.
I can't trust that you won't go off script and go rogue, thinking it's justified because it's all for the sake of keeping me 'safe'.
You ask me to let you make up for your mistakes, but you and I both know you don't see them as mistakes.
Your actions are justified in your eyes.
You haven't apologized once for anything.”
Tears flow freely now. I gasp as a sob threatens to tear from me. “Which is why we can't be together. It's not going to work.” I turn, not bearing to look at him for a second longer. The pain in his face.
“Isobel, please, I love you. I'm sorry.” Jace pleads, desperation thick in his throat.
My eyes squeeze shut. The pain in my chest is overwhelming, choking me. My feet are rooted to the ground. Gathering every bit of strength within me, I walk out of the room, leaving a piece of my heart with him.
When I make my way to the waiting room, the tears have slowed but the ache is persistent.
Luca and Noah are waiting in the waiting room. As soon as they see me, Luca jumps up and runs over, enveloping me in his arms.
“Oh, Iz, he's going to be okay,” Luca murmurs, his voice vibrating through his chest.
The words won’t come. But the safety I feel gives me relief, and I let everything go.
“Sh…” Luca soothes, running a hand up and down my back, “I'm right here.” Luca's arms tighten around me.
“I'll go check on him,” Noah says. Then his steps are fading down the hall.
Luca and I stand there for a few minutes, with me just crying into his chest, my hands fisting the back of his shirt like he's my only lifeline.
“I got you.” Luca continues to repeat.
I wipe my eyes on the back of my sleeves, sniffling,
“I'm sorry, Luca,” I push the words out, “I'm such a mess.”
Luca guides me with a hand on my back to one of the chairs, grabbing a handful of napkins from the coffee station. I take them, wiping my eyes and blowing my nose.
“Hot,” Luca jokes, and a choked laugh comes out before I can stop it.
Luca sits beside me, his arms wrap around me once again.
I rest my head on his shoulder, gripping the tissues in my hand.
“This isn't fair to you.” I stare at my hands and pick at the edge of an unused napkin.
Luca forces air through his lips.
“So, you're getting back with him?”
Luca mistakes the tension in my body as an answer.
“Just tell me how. How can he hurt you so thoroughly, and you're just willing to take him back?”
I lift my head. “Luca…”
He stands up, beginning to pace.
“He lied, Iz! He lied to you, lied to us. He kidnapped you!” He's running his hands through his hair as he rambles.
“Luca—”
“He literally left you in a basement to be tortured for five months. FIVE months!”
“Silvain—”
“And he goes off and does the same thing, lying to us, hiding the real plan, and he gets hurt, and all is forgiven?”
“No, he's not—”
“I know you're going to say that it's going to take time to rebuild what you had, but I can't just stand by and let you do this.
I can't just let you go back into his arms and wait for him to hurt you again.
Not when I know I could keep you safe. I would never hurt you.
I would tell you everything. I know that no matter what, there's a way for us to work through everything, as long as we do it together.”
I push myself up from the chair, tissues falling to the floor. I cross over, stopping him in his tracks.
“He says he loves you, but does he really? Who lets a crazy bitch inject something into the person they 'love' so they can take them to their dad's evil lair to get chained up and—”
“LUCA, Shut. Up.” I grab his face in my hands, forcing him to look at me.
“Isobel—”
“Luca, hear my words. I'm not getting back together with Jace.”
He blinks.
“Y-you're not?” He brings his hands up to mine, taking them and peeling them from his face.
“No.” I shake my head for emphasis.
“When you came out crying and everything… I just assumed.”
“Well, that's what happens when you assume, you make an ass out of you and me.”
Luca smiles, then frowns. “Then why were you crying?”
“I told him it's over. I can’t be with him. I can't trust him. I can't accept his actions or his reasoning for them. It's just not going to work.”
Luca blinks at me, his eyes wide. “Go out with me.”
“Did you even hear what I just said?” I try to push him away.
“Yes, did you hear what I said? I’m serious.” Luca catches my hand, pulling me to him. “Give me a chance. I think we’d be so good together. Let me be your safe harbor.” He grins.
“You’re relentless.”
“Go out with me, pretty girl. Just once. Let me prove it.”
“I just told you Jace and I are over and you decide to ask me out?”
“You’ve been over from the moment the needle touched your skin.”
I scoff, but Luca doesn’t let me hide behind it.
“You think I’m all jokes and sex appeal, but I see you,” he murmurs, stepping closer, “I’ve always seen you. You’re strong, even when you’re exhausted. Let me be the place where you can take the armor off.” He steps closer, his forehead nearly touching mine.
“I want to be the only one holding you and keeping the nightmares away. Admit it, you sleep better when I’m around.”
His thumb brushes my cheek, and I huff out a laugh.
“I know you’re hurting. But I’m not going anywhere,” he whispers.
“Luca…” My voice cracks. “I’m being held together with some chewing gum and scotch tape. I’m broken. I don’t want to… inflict that on you. You deserve more. Someone whole.”
“See, that’s where you’re wrong. We’re all a little broken, in one way or another. I’ll supply you with the chewing gum and scotch tape. Because the truth is, you’ve been gluing me back together.”
“That was so cheesy,” I whisper, a smile tugging at my mouth
“I know, I felt it.” He chuckles, low and warm. “When it comes to this cheese, you’re lactose intolerant.”
I laugh. “It’s tolerable… coming from you.”
“Now that was cheesy.”
I shove at him again, but Luca laughs, the sound bright and full, lighting something in my chest.
“Okay.” I squeeze his hand.
“Okay?” his brows lift.
“Okay, I’ll go out with you.”
Luca scoops me up, spinning me in a sudden burst of joy. I shriek, laughing as he sets me back down.
“You just made me the happiest man on Earth.”
“You make it sound like I said yes to a proposal, not a date.” I brush my hair from my face.
“Technically, it was a proposal of sorts,” Luca smirks.
I’m sitting in the Guild lounge, sifting through everything they’ve gathered on Daniel when the doors swing open behind me.
“He looks like he got hit by a truck,” Maeve announces.
“Not helpful.” Noah deadpans.
“It was an observational statement.” I can hear the smile in her voice.
“A rude one.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, would you like me to pretend his face isn’t fifty shades of purple?”
“I’d like you to have tact, just once,” Noah almost pleads.
“It’s not like he can hear me from here.”
I laugh as I turn. “God, I’ve missed you two.”
“Iz!” Maeve skips over and crushes me in a hug. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m alright.” I hug her back.
They drop into the seats on either side of me.
“Well, hello, stranger.” I turn to Noah.
He chuckles. “Hello yourself.”
“I feel like you’ve been avoiding me.”
“It does feel like you’ve been avoiding her,” Maeve chimes in.
Noah shoots Maeve a look, then turns back to me with an easy smile, “No, I just figured you had your hands full with all the bullshit, so I was helping where I could.”
“I appreciate it. Really.”
Noah gives me a large, cheesy smile. Maeve laughs.
“So, what are you looking at?” Noah leans in, glancing at the screen.
I slump back, huffing out my annoyance.
“Daniel. I’m trying to sort the real intel from the crap Gideon planted.”
Maeve hums. “How can you tell?”
“Gideon had Jace sabotage certain missions. He told us which ones to ignore.” Noah pulls the laptop over to him, his fingers going to work.
I turn to face Maeve. “What have you been up to?”
She forces air through her lips. “Nothing really. Just hanging around, classes and stuff.”
“You should do some of the training we do for the Guild.” I nudge her.
“Nah, then what do I need my bodyguards for?” She giggles. “You worry too much. You’re going to give yourself an ulcer.”
I roll my eyes. “Whatever. Where are Felix and Kellan anyways?”
“I think they went to the gym or something. Since Noah was taking over babysitting duties.”
Noah scoffs. I raise an eyebrow at him.
“My talents are being wasted on babysitting brats.”
“I am not a brat!” Maeve huffs, crossing her arms.
“Oh, you are indeed a brat.” Noah’s voice is low as he looks at her over his glasses.
Pink tints her cheeks as she turns away. I’m about to open my mouth and ask when Noah breaks my thoughts.
“So, what’s going on with Jace and Luca?”
“Look at you, asking for the tea.” Maeve grins and rests her elbows on the table.
Noah rolls his eyes. “I’m asking to know if I need to ask Lucian for another room to separate them.”
“Fair.” Maeve shrugs.
“Jace is… that’s done. I mean, I’m sure we’ll learn how to be around each other in time, but for now…” I take a deep breath, trying to work around the ache in my chest. “For now, I just don’t trust him.”
“Thank goodness.” Maeve slumps on the table, “I was prepared to give you a whole lecture if you were going to go back to him after everything.”
Noah nods slowly, “I’m sorry about how everything went down. I understand where you’re coming from. I wasn’t happy with Jace hiding things from us either. We’re supposed to be a team, and he just decided what would happen to everyone.”
I can feel the tension leave my shoulders.
“I know I’ve been with Jace for most of the time since you’ve been back, but I didn’t want him to be alone.” Noah continues. “I made it clear to him that even though I didn’t agree with his actions, we weren’t abandoning him. Luca shunning him was enough. He didn’t need to be isolated.”
“Maybe he should’ve been.” Maeve mumbles, “Would’ve taught him something.”
I giggle. “He’s stubborn too, Maeve. I’m not sure that would’ve helped him see his actions were wrong.”
“Well, does he think his actions were wrong now?” She arches an eyebrow.
“No, he still thinks it’s justified.” The reminder still aches like a bruise I keep pressing.
“I’ve known Jace for years. It’ll just take time.”
“And Luca? Is he done shunning him?”
“For now, but… he did ask me out.”
“WHAT?!” Maeve shouts, lurching forward. “Fuck Jace! You should’ve led with that! What did you say?” She bounces excitedly in her seat.
Noah shakes his head, giving Maeve a look over the rim of his glasses. “I saw this coming.”
“Of course you did.” Maeve sticks her tongue out at him. “So?” She looks at me expectantly.
“I said yes.” A small smile tugs at my lips before I can stop it.
“I KNEW IT!” Maeve jumps out of her seat. “You owe me twenty bucks.”
“Wait, what?!” I look up at her, then to Noah.
“I never agreed to anything.” He lifts his hands.
“He’s no fun.” She pouts.
I laugh as she lowers herself back into her chair, still buzzing with energy.
Noah shakes his head. “You two exhaust me,” he mutters.
“You love us,” Maeve sings.
He doesn’t argue. He turns the laptop toward me. “I cleared out the obvious plants. What’s left…isn’t great.”
The lightness from the conversation leaves me as I’m brought back to our current reality. Daniel, Gideon, everything waiting outside the room rolls back in like dark clouds from an incoming storm.
Noah reaches over, squeezing my arm and grounding me. “We’ll figure it out.”
Maeve nods. “All of it.”
I swallow hard, nodding slowly.