Chapter 35
THIRTY-FIVE
brINLEY
My mind spun through the horror of memories while I lay there in the sanctuary of Silas’s arms. I wanted to give it all to him, but I wasn’t sure that I could force the details from my tongue.
I wasn’t ready. I didn’t know if I’d ever be.
But I had to give him something.
I wanted to.
My mouth felt sticky and dry, but I managed to force out, “Dereck owed these guys money…”
I guess those few words were loaded with enough implication that Silas felt the full force of them.
Because he flinched then pulled me closer, hazel eyes waiting. Searching my face.
“They used me to punish him.”
“Fuck. Brinley.” It was a brutal grunt. Every muscle in Silas’s body curled with aggression.
His arms were locked so tight, and I got the sense he was desperate to make me understand that I wasn’t alone.
Or maybe that he was willing to crush anyone who’d ever hurt me in my past.
Tears blurred my eyes. I hadn’t had someone care for me this way in so many years. And then? It’d been my mother. Which was a whole different experience from this.
I felt overwhelmed by it.
Struck.
Like I could maybe…let go.
“It’s okay, baby, I’m right here,” he murmured, then hedged, “What happened?”
“All three of them attacked me, used me, and I think they had the intention of killing me…”
I couldn’t believe that I let that much out. That I trusted this man who was supposed to be the last person I could trust with my darkest secret.
My chest stretched as he somehow gathered me closer.
Rage blistered through him while this tender care soaked right through the middle of it.
“I actually lost consciousness,” I told him, “which I guess was a blessing.”
I choked over it, so awkwardly. Giving this part of myself to someone felt foreign.
Strange.
Even the fragments that remained jagged in my mind.
“I woke up in the hospital. I don’t even know how I got there.”
“Who were they?” Fury curled around his growl, and his massive hands fisted at my back. No question, it caused him physical pain not to get out of this bed and release it.
My head barely shook. “I don’t even know.”
I’d woken up to Dereck at my side. Holding my hand and promising it would never happen again.
They’d stolen his phone and used it to lure me. He swore he had no idea they would do something so despicable. Swore he was sorrier than he’d ever been. Swore that he would never get himself into that kind of trouble again.
But he’d also begged me not to give the police details or else he was dead.
It was the hardest thing I’d ever done. Protecting him after what he’d caused.
But I couldn’t be the reason for his death sentence.
And after that, he’d been…better.
Still a mess. Constantly losing jobs and not having enough for rent. But that was minimal in comparison.
We’d been halfway normal until now.
“But Dereck knows,” Silas seethed. It wasn’t even a question. It was a straight shot of judgement.
I swallowed around the tears. “Yes. But I didn’t want to know. I didn’t want the burden of knowing who they were and knowing they were out there if I couldn’t do anything about it. Dereck was dead if I went after them.”
“I can do something about it.” There was a promise behind it. Like that was exactly what he intended.
My head barely shook. “It’s in the past, Silas. I just want to live. Put all of this behind us. Ensure my brother is safe, then I want to live life. Finally, truly live it.”
He didn’t look convinced. I was pretty sure the next chance he got he was going to shake the names out of Dereck.
Probably right before he put a bullet in my brother’s brain.
I scratched my fingertips over the stubble on his cheek. “I need you to promise me that you’ll let this go.”
His jaw clenched. “Not sure that I can. Idea of someone hurting you makes me want to go on a rampage. I want to end anyone who’s ever hurt you. Destroy them the way they deserve to be.”
He brushed back a curl from my face, twining it around his finger as he stared at me through the dancing shadows.
“You want to fight for me, King?” I meant for it to come out playful, but it was brimming with emotion.
The pad of his thumb stroked my cheek. “Yeah, Brinley, it’s become blatantly apparent that I do.”
“I just want this all behind me.”
He inhaled a cleansing breath like he was packing away the little I revealed, but I had the sense he planned on ripping it wide open later.
“And what does that look like, Brinley? If you were fighting for you? Living a little for yourself and not sacrificing everything for your brother?”
I shrugged a little. “I don’t know. Maybe I’d go back to school. I always had this dream of being an accountant.”
His soft chuckle was surprised. “An accountant? I thought most girls dreamed of being librarians or doctors or, if you’re Elena, opening an adorable store.”
His eyes widened a smidgeon with the tease.
I could feel the redness pink my cheeks.
It seemed once I let a wall down, the vulnerability came flooding out.
“I don’t know…I just…like piecing numbers together.
It’s like a puzzle that I’m solving. And I like the idea that I might be able to help people save money, maybe?
Take some of the strain off their lives. ”
“Which is why you’re taking that job out in the office so seriously?” he surmised.
I sent him a playful glower. “I don’t do anything half-assed. What did you expect?”
He shocked me by suddenly rolling onto his back and pulling me on top of him. His fingers weaved into the fall of my hair as he gazed up at me. “What I didn’t expect was you.”