Sevastyan
The next morning came with a message from Alexi on Sevastyan’s phone:
Sevastyan texted back:
Then he lay in bed for several long minutes, arm thrown over his eyes. On either side of him, Lisa and Rei slept on. Or at least Rei felt like he was asleep. Lisa lay with a stillness that gave rise to doubt.
“Lisa,” he murmured.
Lisa’s eyes opened, meeting his gaze, then dropping.
“Alexi is coming the day after tomorrow.”
Lisa stayed still, giving nothing away.
“We’ve gotten lax with how we interact. Alexi will notice.”
Lisa subtly tightened and pulled away without any outward movement.
He turned on his side, facing the taller slave, and lifted his hand to slide his palm around the back of Lisa’s neck. Lisa closed his eyes, breathing through his nose. Sevastyan held the pose, waiting for Lisa to give. And he did, by degrees, softening into the commanding touch.
He rewarded him with a soft stroke of his thumb against his cheek. “I want you to stay.”
“Permission to speak,” Lisa whispered.
“We’re talking as men right now, so speak. We have to decide what we’re going to present to Alexi.”
Lisa closed his eyes, an internal struggle going on inside his thoughts. Sevastyan left his hand in place, giving Lisa a taste of what he might be submitting to.
“Want to stay,” Lisa said. “But have to give him something.”
“Do you have something in mind?”
Lisa’s chest rose and fell. “Faking doesn’t work with him. That’s how he got as much of me as he has.”
“I’m not forcing you. Whatever we show him, you have to agree to.”
Lisa nodded. His eyes were screwed up tight and his breathing came faster. “Bind my hands.”
Sevastyan blinked. “What?”
Lisa held his hands up between them, wrapping Sevastyan’s fingers around his wrist, then working the second wrist in. Sevastyan brought his other hand upward and held both of Lisa’s wrists.
Lisa made his hands into fists. “It has to be real. He’s going to watch for the tells, to see if I’m actually submitting. If I’m used to being handled. If you have control, more than just a leash. So bind my hands, wrap them up with bandages, no fingers.”
Sevastyan swallowed. Lisa would be mostly helpless. Eating, drinking, toiletry activities, all of it would require help. Humiliating help.
“It’s the one thing that almost broke me. It will fuck with my head. I’ll need you, and you’ll be providing care. Don’t . . . don’t let Rei help me. Just you. It will . . . make me look for you.”
Sevastyan closed his eyes. What Lisa was proposing, it would work.
Lisa was already vulnerable with his hurt ribs, extensive bruising, and the serious cut in his thigh.
Taking his hands and making him reliant on Sevastyan for everything would bring him down hard and fast.
The small things Alexi looked for, like the direction of a slave’s eyes and the subtle ways their bodies opened or closed towards their handlers, would show up quickly, more quickly if Lisa continued complicit in his own conditioning.
“Any ‘trying’ Alexi reads in you he’ll ascribe to how much you want to stay with Rei,” Sevastyan said.
Lisa nodded, eyes on where Sevastyan held his hand. “Some flinching will be reasonable after the attack, right?”
“Yes. I’ll go get bandages,” Sevastyan said.
If Lisa was willing, waiting would only make giving up his autonomy and dignity more difficult.
Rei never wanted to wait if he knew he and Sevastyan were training for a public display.
If it was humiliating or difficult, he didn’t want to know until it was time, and then he just wanted to be in it.
Lisa had stayed where he left him. Sevastyan sat against the headboard and pulled Lisa in between the V of his legs, his back to Sevastyan’s chest.
He took Lisa’s hands, already bruised and hurt, and turned them this way and that, studying the injuries.
“We’ll tie your wrists at night and unwrap your fingers then, so these get some air,” he said.
Lisa said nothing. He held still as ointment was applied and the binding started. It took time, bending in one each of Lisa’s fingers, creating soft fists and wrapping them until they resembled paws more than hands. Lisa looked at them and shuddered as the last of the bandages were set aside.
Sevastyan moved, bringing his hands to Lisa’s arms and stroking. Lisa curled in on himself. Sevastyan drew him in against his chest, raising his knees and caging him.
Lisa braced himself, forehead against Sevastyan’s shoulder for a long time. When he spoke, it was low and slow. “Alexi is going to wonder why I’m not fighting you.”
“Tell him the truth,” Sevastyan murmured into Lisa’s hair, stroking the other man’s back gently, mindful of the bruising.
“Tell him you cracked and threw things and that I punished you, that you were tired. That I’m taking credit for killing Dirk’s men instead of you. That I’m letting you be with Rei.”
Lisa took a shuddering breath. “It would have been enough. I hate that it would have been enough.”