Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Karen
As much as I tried to get my breathing to level out, I couldn’t.
My chest heaved. I had no claim on Gav whatsoever, and I had no idea what was between them, but I’d heard how she spoke to him when I’d been working.
I sighed heavily and turned away. You couldn’t miss her hands on him.
The way they rested on his body, the way she looked up at him.
Fuck! What is wrong with me? I watched as he fought through the crowd and slipped through the door.
As I looked back to where they’d both stood, Nikki had disappeared now, too.
I needed a drink. My head was a mess, I was so confused.
Surely, he wouldn’t have kissed me the other night if he was with someone, or had I really got this wrong?
I blew out a breath and headed for the table with a smile fixed to my face.
I picked up my vodka and knocked it back in one gulp.
“More shots?” I asked the others with a forced smile.
Everyone agreed except Gav, who was outside.
I wanted to go outside to him, but I was scared.
I couldn’t take rejection, I’d never been able to, so my motto was if I didn’t try, I couldn’t get hurt.
Lifting my arm up at one of the servers, she nodded at me and came straight over.
I could have gone to the bar. There’s only me that can do that, but only because of Holly being bar manager and everyone knows me.
She reached me with her arm up and a tray balanced on her hand. “What can I get you all?”
“Round of tequila, please? Put it on my tab though.” I made sure she knew not to place it on Roman’s.
“No.” Roman interrupted as he waved me off. “Put it on mine, and get one for yourself.” He smiled and gave the waitress a wink, I just knew the way his eyes smiled that he’d used that charm more than once. I shook my head and looked back at the front exit.
“Are you okay, Karen?” Paisley asked as she touched my arm to get my attention. My head snapped back her way and I forced another grin.
“Of course.”
A small frown twitched at her forehead, “Are you sure? You don’t look okay.”
I breathed a gentle sigh, and tried to keep it together. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course…” she patted the leather bench she was sitting on, and I slid in behind the table.
“I’m not sure I should be asking this; I mean it’s really none of my business…” I rambled.
“Just ask, whatever it is.”
“Are Gav and Nikki like, together?”
“Together? What, you mean a couple?”
I nodded at her; I suddenly couldn’t find my voice.
“Those two… ugh, they had something going on, but they’re about as different as chalk and cheese.” I didn't know how to feel about that. The way she put her hands on him though, I knew. “Why do you ask?” Paisley’s voice broke me from erratic thoughts.
My head shook, “Oh, just something I saw earlier, I guess. I just wondered.” I shrugged and Paisley studied my eyes.
Just then the waitress brought the tray with our tequila on.
Nothing like a distraction, “Cheers, guys.” I picked up the small glass between my finger and thumb and lifted it to my lips.
Nikki slid up beside me, looking completely unaffected, I wanted to ask her.
I wanted to know what was going on, but there was no way I could ask her.
If I wanted to know anything, it was going to have to be Gav.
I tipped the liquor back, my throat was on fire as it slid down and when it hit my chest, I thought it was going to crumble.
“Fuck!” Paisley laughed and Nikki picked up hers, too.
I watched her down it, then I excused myself and went in search of Gav.
It’d been a good ten or fifteen minutes since he’d left the bar, I’m sure he’d calmed down a little bit now.
I pushed through the door and looked one way, then the other. I couldn’t see him, though, so I stepped out onto the sidewalk and made my way to the parking lot at the back. As I rounded the corner, I saw someone with his back against the wall, “Gav?”
He looked across at me and he stood up straight, now I knew it was him I went over. “Are you okay?”
He smiled, “Yeah, I’m good,” but even I could tell it was forced. “What are you doing out here?”
“Looking for you?” He lifted his chin in answer, but no words came out. “I saw you with Nikki?” His brows furrowed over his eyes.
“Okay… I’m not sure what you’re getting at though. There was nothing to see.”
“There was plenty to see if you know what you’re looking at. So, I’m going to ask you this. Are you together?”
“Why do you want to know?”
“Why can’t you just answer the question?”
His cheeks puffed out as he breathed deeply, irritation lining his face as he scowled. “No.” His answer was short and sharp, “No, I’m not with Nikki. What you think you saw, you didn't see.”
“I’m not stupid, Gav. Don’t treat me like I am. Also, I know we’re not together in any sense of the word, but maybe if you’d told me a little about yourself, I would’ve understood.”
My head shook, but I wasn’t going to question him anymore.
Whatever was going on between them they could have, they could keep it.
I should’ve known not to get too close, but my stupid heart wanted other things.
I whirled away from him, but before I could even take a step his hand had captured my arm in a tight grip and spun me back around.
“I would never treat you like you’re stupid.”
“You just did.”
His jaw tensed as he briefly glanced away, “As for what you saw,” he brought his gaze back to mine, “that was me telling Nikki I wasn’t interested. Fuck!”
He released my arm and moved to pace in front of me, his hands balled into fists and hung at his sides. “Fucking women think they have the right to hold shit over me.”
“Gav, I don’t think that at all.” I stopped him with my hand on his arm.
“But if there’s something between you and Nikki, you need to tell me right now.
This is my job. And you know what, I happen to like you, a lot.
But I won’t be the woman to break something up.
” Then like a thunderbolt, out of the blue, it hit me.
“Hang on, fuck this, if there was something between you and Nikki, why the fuck haven’t you told me!
Why have you led me to believe you’re single?
You’re no fucking better than the rest.” For the second time, I whirled away in temper, my heartbeat thundered away in my chest as I tried to breath.
My feet stamped on the asphalt as I marched away from him, but his arms wrapped around me from behind and my feet lifted from the ground as I was carried back to the spot we’d been in.
“If I put you down, are you going to listen to me?” He whispered against my ear.
“Just put me down.” I gritted out.
“Aren’t you’re a little fireball,” he chuckled, but that just made me more pissed. “Are you going to listen to what I have to say?”
I moved my head to the side, “Put me down and find out.”
My feet found the ground again and I turned to face him but I kept some distance between us.
“I won’t lie to you, I promise. I mean, I’m not the most forthcoming or even truthful man, but I swear I’ll tell you the truth about me and Nikki.
” I nodded and let him go on. “It was just sex. That’s all it’s ever been. ”
My brows lifted at his brutal honesty but I didn’t know what to do with that information. “Well, thanks for that, but I’m not sure I feel better or worse.” I knew, either way, I was way out of my depth here. “I just wanted the truth. But I won’t stand between you.”
I turned away again, tears pricked at my eyes for the thought of what could’ve been between us, even though I knew absolutely nothing about him, I was ready to find out along the way. “Were you not listening to me, K? It was just sex.” I turned back and swallowed before I licked my dry lips.
“I know. And I was listening, but I’m no competition, not where someone like Nikki is concerned.”
He stepped forward and walked me backwards, my back hit the wall with a soft bump and I breathed heavy.
“What do you mean? You’re not competition.
” I couldn’t answer him, there was no reasonable excuse to use.
He was in my face, everything about him surrounded me.
His scent, his strength, his arms caged me in until his chest was just inches from mine.
I couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to have his weight bearing down on me.
I couldn’t concentrate. I couldn’t see the light of his blue eyes as it was so dark out here, but his intense stare was so overbearing.
“Don’t ever put yourself down.” His lips brushed mine, and the short stubble on his face tickled my chin.
“You have so many amazing qualities.” His fingers were soft as he brushed the hair from my face, “Why don’t we get out of here and we can work on those qualities. ”
“We can’t,” I steadied my voice but I was far from confident, “if we both leave the others will talk. And honestly, I’ve seen Nikki pissed, I don’t want to be on the end of that wrath.” I dipped under his arm and moved away.
His hand gripped my arm, “Stop running from me.” He sounded exhausted as he tugged me back. I noted mentally that he even looked tired as he rubbed his eyes and forehead with his free hand.
“Look, I’m going inside and I’ll find an excuse to leave. They’re your friends, you should be with them. I don’t want to make it awkward for you.”
“Make it awkward? Fuck K, why?”
“Because I’m not the type of person that makes life hard.”
He stared at me for the longest time and stepped forward, I moved back, here we go again I thought, but I was wrong.
My gasp was loud as his hands framed my face in a firm hold and with a slight tilt of his head, he put his lips on mine.
They were firm as he pressed, his hands tight as they held me rigid, but as he kissed me, I couldn’t help but let my body melt into his.
He held me up when my knees turned weak, and as his hand delved into the back of my hair, I let him consume me, again.
He pulled away and licked his lips, “You don’t want to know how hard I am right now.
So, we’re going to go back in there, stay for a little bit longer, and then you are coming back to my place and we’re going to talk.
Yeah?” I agreed. My head was fuzzy, my mind filled with him, he was all I could think about in that instance.
“And when we’ve talked, maybe we can set about getting rid of this fucking tension between us. ” He grinned a one-sided smirk.
“Is that your way of telling me you want to have sex, Gav?”
That smirk was still there as he looked down at me, “Oh, hell no. That’s my way of saying that you and me are gonna fuck.”
“Such a gentleman.” I rolled my eyes, “I guess this is the best time to tell you I don’t do one night stands usually.”
“How did I know you’d say that?” His lips pushed into a boyish pout, but his gaze didn’t falter.
I had no clue how tonight would end, but truthfully, one night stand or not, it wasn’t going to change how I already felt about him.
Talk about falling in an instant. “Come on, let’s go back in.
” His arm slid around me and rested on my shoulders as we walked together.
“Gav, where the fuck have you been?” My body tensed when I heard the deep baritone of Rhys’s voice from just up ahead. He must’ve come looking for him.
His arm fell from around me; I kept my head hung and focussed on the sidewalk. from around me. “I’m here. I’m coming now.” He looked between me and Gav.
“Everything okay?” I looked up but I wasn’t sure who he was asking, I answered with a quick nod anyway.
I smiled as I passed him by and went back inside. I breathed in and blew the breath out slowly. I’m sure Gavin Wright was going to my downfall, in fact I knew it, but at the same time, there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to stop it.