Chapter Eleven #2
He flinched as if he hadn’t wanted me to know that part—as if he hoped I would be different and would happily devour the meal. Hunger ached in both of us. A hunger that didn’t just grumble in my belly but in every limb, cell, and beat of my sickly heart.
I sagged on his lap, recalling yet more notes my parents had taken—typing furiously on their laptops when they thought I was fast asleep on the couch in their office, waiting to go home.
I’d read those notes in secret.
I knew that the lab animals nearing the end always went off their food.
Nothing could entice them, and if the lab technician took matters into their own hands and forced them...everything came back up again.
Lucien followed those thoughts too. A flash of pain at the thought of me leaving him was quickly smothered with savage determination not to let that happen.
Tossing the apple away, he snatched up a bottle of water.
Cradling me against him, he twisted the top off and held it against my lips.
“I’m not taking no for an answer on this.
Who knows how long we’ve been unconscious.
If we stand any hope of getting out of this place, you need to at least sate your thirst.”
Without a word, I forced my arms up and clutched the bottle. I trembled, weak beyond belief. Never looking away from me, Lucien supported the bottom as I tipped it back and drank.
I grimaced at the wet, uncomfortable sensation as if my body had already abandoned the ability to eat or drink. It wasn’t soothing, nor did it quench my thirst. But I drank another mouthful for him, squeezing my eyes tight as my stomach roiled.
I tried to push it away after my third, but Lucien didn’t let me. “Another. Even if those lab animals you were thinking of went off their food, we don’t have to. Sure, it’s a struggle, but as long as we actually eat and drink, our bodies won’t break down and—”
I retched.
Flinging myself over his arm, the three mouthfuls came back up again, splashing onto the ground.
“Fuck.” Lucien gathered my hair back as I retched and retched. Nothing else came up. I had nothing inside me for days and days, but that didn’t stop the sickness making everything miserable.
Only once the nausea subsided did I have enough strength to cringe with embarrassment. My gaze locked onto the tiny puddle I’d caused, grateful it was only water, minus the chunk of unchewed sandwich.
Lucien shifted me off his lap. The black-covered mattress rustled as he laid me down beside him, spreading my hair above my head.
His eyes held a hundred worries as he pressed the back of his hand to my forehead. “You’re burning up.” His voice shook a little. “You’re normally so cold...”
“I’m fine.” I grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand away. The prison cell swam with my efforts. “Really.”
He scoffed and shook his head. “You’re not fine. None of this is fine.” His voice cracked as he looked away. His jaw locked so tight, the muscle jumped, trying to hold himself together.
With a curse, he snatched the other water bottle, unscrewed the cap, and chugged it all in one go. Water spilled down his chin, soaking into his black shirt as he swallowed. His chest strained and he groaned as if it took all his willpower, but...he finished it.
Grimacing, he rasped, “I’ll eat everything.
I’ll get my strength back.” Grabbing the apple, he held it to his lips but didn’t take a bite.
“It must be night right now. I can’t hear any of the reactors running.
There aren’t any heartbeats either. There’s no one around which means I have time to let this food grant me energy, and then I’ll break us out before they return. ”
He sank his teeth into the apple; the crunch and sweetness almost made me gag again.
I wanted to believe him as he chewed with single-minded determination, but the world kept fading in and out. Sharp pains crawled through my insides as if a thousand tiny bugs devoured me.
And the dead started singing again.
Come back...
It’s peaceful here...
No more hunger. No more pain...
Become one of us...
I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing desperately that I could reverse time. Go back to the last peaceful moment before Lucien had stupidly gone up the mountain without me.
The sound of him tearing into the apple filled the silence. I opened my eyes, and for three stressful seconds, he looked triumphant—as if all it took to overcome the disgust for food was sheer willpower, but then...
His body revoked everything.
Lurching off the mattress, he slapped a hand over his mouth. The half-eaten apple rolled across the floor as he staggered to the far corner of the cell. He barely made it before he vomited. Everything he’d just forced down came roaring back up in violent, gut-wrenching heaves.
“Lucien!” I tried to sit up and go to him. I fell back down instead.
I hated, hated being so weak.
He continued retching, bracing one hand against the wall, shoulders shuddering. When he finally straightened, he looked so much worse than before. Grey skin, glassy eyes, his chest heaving as if the dregs of whatever energy he did have were now completely gone.
“Well shit,” he sighed, half swaying, half stumbling back to me.
I attempted to catch him as he collapsed beside me.
For a long moment, we just held each other, shaking and hurting and breathing each other in. The bond felt paper-thin—every fear, every regret, every scrap of love laid bare.
“I’ve already gone through the pain of almost losing you,” he whispered. “How am I supposed to survive it again?”
“Don’t live in the future. We’re both still here...for now.”
“Barely.” Rolling onto his side, he brushed my bottom lip with his thumb. “We’re both barely here. And if we stay here, who the hell knows what they’re going to do to us come morning.”
The stacked bones and echoes of the dead tried to trap me in their memories again.
What would happen when they came for us?
Would they bleed us like they had with Lucien in Cinderkeep? Would they torture us? Maim us?
“I won’t let them,” Lucien hissed. “I’ll kill every last one of them before they lay a single finger on you.” His voice tightened with promise, even as his weakness festered like an open wound.
I could feel how close he was to breaking. How close we both were.
We might not even make it until morning...
Lucien sucked in a breath, his eyes widening with horror.
I scrambled to make him feel better—to change my thoughts so I didn’t make us morbidly depressed before the sun came up. “Ignore me. I don’t—”
“You truly don’t think we’ll survive, do you?”
I flinched.
I had no reply.
All I had was the comforting knowledge that I wouldn’t die alone. I’d met him, loved him, and had him for such a short while, but...it was enough.
“It will never be enough,” he snarled. “I will never stop wanting more of you.”
Same. I smiled, resorting to talking without words because it took less energy. If I’d known how quickly it would all be over, I would’ve gotten you into bed back in Cinderkeep.
I waited for him to chuckle at my lame joke, but his eyes turned stormy.
Sorry... I cupped his cheek with trembling fingers. I didn’t mean—
“Fuck it.” He captured my hand and pressed it against his face. “If you think we might be dead by morning, then....”
Falling over me, he kissed me.
Sweetly, deeply, desperately.
The moment our lips met, our hearts slammed wide open. Our souls crashed together with all our love and pain and need.
The scent of apple surrounded us—
And the cell vanished.